by Eva Luxe
“I’m so glad you told me,” I said to Kyle later that night when we sat together on the couch, his arm was around me, my head on his shoulder.
“I’m sorry it took this long,” he said.
I shook my head. “Better late than never, right?”
Kyle shrugged so my head moved.
“I want to say one more thing,” he said.
I tilted my head to him. It was the night for confessions. Whatever he was about to tell me, I wanted to be sure we could get through it. I wanted us to be okay again.
“Yeah?” I asked.
Kyle looked at me, and his eyes were a brilliant blue, the color of a fall sky, the color that went on forever.
“I love you.”
It took me a moment to process. Warmth rushed through me, and I smiled, shifting so I could put my arms around his neck.
“I love you, too.”
God, it felt good to be able to say that. There had been a time when we’d said those words to each other every day, but when we’d met again, it had been the one thing we hadn’t been able to pick up again.
Kyle pressed his lips to mine, kissing me like he was never going to let me go. He wrapped his arms around my body and pulled me flush against him. This was where I wanted to be, so close to him that I didn’t know where my body stopped or where his began.
Kyle’s hand moved to my hair, holding me at the back of my head, and it made me feel small and delicate, beautiful when he balanced me between his hand and his mouth like that. The other hand slid over my shoulder and onto my chest. His hand was on my breast, and he squeezed it, massaging me. My nipples hardened against the material of the bra.
I wanted him to undress me. I wanted him to touch me inch by inch, claiming every part of me.
Kyle broke the kiss and took my hand. He pulled me up with him and led me to his bedroom. He turned around, facing me again, and kissed me. Kyle kissed me in a way he hadn’t in a long time. It was sensual and loving, as if nothing else in the world mattered. And it didn’t.
We took turns, undressing each other bit by bit, taking care to remove an item of clothing before kissing again, touching, sliding our palms over each other’s naked skin. We were relearning each other, getting to know the person we had once known and somehow lost along the way.
When I undid Kyle’s pants I kneeled before him and pulled his pants down over his leg, taking his jockey shorts with them. It was a struggle over his thighs— he might not have played football for a while, but he still had thunder thighs. When I succeeded, his hard cock sprung free, erect and glistening with his desire for me.
I kissed his abdomen, kissed him down each thigh and around his groin. I kissed him everywhere but his sex, driving him crazy, denying him the one thing he wanted.
“God, Maya,” Kyle said through gritted teeth. He touched my hair and played with it. I looked up at him before I closed my lips around his cock, sucking him into my mouth.
Kyle groaned, closing his eyes. I moved my head back and forth, sliding my lips over his shaft, meeting my lips with my fist around the base to close the distance that I couldn’t cover. Kyle wasn’t a small man.
I cupped his balls with my other hand, massaging them in time with my sucking. Kyle’s hands in my hair encouraged me, and I bobbed my head faster and faster until Kyle pulled out with a pop. He took my hand and pulled me up, kissing me. He was breathing hard.
“I want you,” he said. And I felt the same.
Kyle helped me out of my underwear before he led me to the bed and lay me down. He quickly grabbed a condom and crawled over me, his eyes on mine all the time. When he settled himself between my legs, it was all as it should be.
Kyle positioned himself at my entrance and pushed into me. I gasped; the feel of him so familiar. It was always better than I remembered— every time. Kyle stroked slowly in and out of me, his face inches from mine, our breathing in sync. It wasn’t fucking this time. We were making love. Kyle’s body covered mine, and we moved together, his cock deep inside me, his thrusting thoughtful.
Slowly, he picked up the pace, bucking his hips faster and faster. He kissed me, a quick peck before he sped up more, and I cried out and moaned as he thrust into me. He worked me toward my first orgasm, and in no time, I toppled over the edge, coming undone at the seams.
When I opened my eyes again, Kyle was looking at me with a smile on his face.
“What?” I breathed.
He ran his hand down my cheek, ran his fingers through my hair, and kissed me.
“I love it when I do that to you.”
I smiled, “Then do it to me again, baby.”
Kyle chuckled and bucked his hips. I was tighter now, more sensitive after having an orgasm. After a while, I tapped Kyle on the shoulder, and he stopped.
“Roll over,” I said. Kyle did as I asked, pulling out and lying on his back on the bed. I clambered onto him, straddling his hips and lowering myself onto his dick.
We both sighed with pleasure when I did.
I started moving back and forth, my hands on his chest, my pussy sliding up and down his cock. When I was on top, I could control every part of me that Kyle reached, and I shivered with the intensity. My clit rubbed against his pubic bone when I leaned forward, and I started bucking my hips, riding him harder and faster. I wanted to push him over the edge, to bring him to orgasm. I fucked him harder and faster, my knees becoming hot on the sheets, my breasts swinging in his face.
Kyle’s hands were on my hips, helping me, pushing me faster and faster. His fingers dug into my hips, but it was hot, pushing me closer and closer to another orgasm. My hair hung over my shoulders, and I leaned down enough that it brushed Kyle’s chest. I knew he loved it. He moved one hand to my hair and tangled his fingers in it. I put everything into it now, riding him until a wave of pleasure washed over me, starting at my core and spreading through my body like an all-consuming fire.
When my walls clamped down on his cock, milking him, contracting and releasing, Kyle released, too. I sat down hard on him, burying him deep inside as he pumped into me, emptying himself. I collapsed on his chest as my orgasm pulled me apart, and I was reduced to the rawest version of myself. It was this side of me that only Kyle knew, and it was beautiful that we had it back again.
“That was amazing,” Kyle said, gasping for air when we were tangled in the aftermath of our sex.
I stiffly climbed off Kyle and lay next to him on the bed. He rolled onto his side, facing me so that we mirrored each other. Kyle hooked my hair behind my ear and smiled at me.
“I know I apologized for what I did and explained myself to you,” Kyle said. “But I want us to know where we stand.”
I blinked at him. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, I want you to know that you are mine and I am yours, and there aren’t any misunderstandings.”
He traced my profile with his fingertips before he looked me in the eye again.
“Will you be my girlfriend?”
I smiled. He was asking me the way he had asked me in college so many years ago. He was making it official, so we both knew what we were to each other. It was the sweetest thing he’d done since we’d run into each other again.
I nodded. “I would love to.”
Kyle kissed me before he took my hands and played with my fingers, interlacing them with his own. His face became serious again.
“What are you thinking about?” I asked.
Kyle took a deep breath. “For so long, I’ve held on to jealousy and resentment over what happened. I want that to change, but if I’m being honest, I don’t know who I am without that.”
I frowned. “I do,” I said. “You’re still the guy I dated I college. You’re still cocky and full of shit sometimes. I know you still love football. You’re not empty by any means. You replaced football with that anger and bitterness, but that was never really you.”
“I do love football, but I don’t know what to do. I want to be close with Jacob again, but the thoug
ht of seeing him play makes me worried that I won’t be able to deal with it.”
“Just because you’re not playing doesn’t mean you can’t be involved with football somehow, you know. Why don’t we talk to Jacob and see if he can put you in contact with a few people? You can do something like coaching or coordinating. There has to be something.”
Kyle blinked at me. “I never thought about it like that,” he said.
“Because you were hurting so much you pushed football and everything connected to it away,” I said.
Kyle nodded. “Well, no more of that. I really do love football.”
“I know,” I said. “And we can make it work. If we do it together, we can do anything.”
Kyle smiled and pulled me against him so we were pressed together. There was nothing between us, no clothes that separated us and no secrets that kept us apart. It was just Kyle and me, and the two of us would be inseparable.
Once upon a time, I had been sure he was my soul mate, my forever. When we had broken up I had been shattered, feeling like I had been wrong, but we had been brought together again and this time, I wasn’t letting him go.
Chapter 21 – Kyle
I decided to go to the football practice at the training center. Jacob had said I was welcome anytime. I hadn’t told Maya or Jacob I was coming; I wanted it to be a surprise to both of them.
For some reason— and I had no idea what it was— it was as if after my conversation with Maya, everything looked different. Maybe all I had needed was to talk to someone about it, to say what bothered me out loud. When I looked back, I knew that I’d felt horrible, but it didn’t make sense anymore. I couldn’t find it in myself to feel that way any longer.
Parking, I walked to the training grounds where the girls were already warming up. When Maya spotted me, her face split into a grin. Some of the others noticed me, too, and whispered. They asked Maya questions, and she was nodding and smiling. I liked that they knew I was with her and that they were talking about me. Such a good reaction from here would make any man proud.
She was elegant and graceful as she had always been. Maya moved as if she had music within her. She was strong, a lifetime of fitness had made her graceful and able, and she was a reliable, full-fledged member of the squad. She was one of the latest additions, but it wasn’t hard to see that the cheerleaders all respected her and saw her as one of their own. It was beautiful to see unity like that.
I knew what that felt like. When a team worked together well, the chemistry itself was intoxicating. I had experienced it a few times in my life, too.
When the cheerleaders were done, Jacob and his team emerged from the locker room. When he spotted me, a question flashed over his face. I grinned at him, and he grinned back. He understood.
“I’m glad you could make it, man,” he said, walking up to me.
“Glad I could be here.”
We shook hands, and in the connection our palms made was a world of unspoken words. We didn’t have to say anything to each other to know. We were best friends. We always had been, and we always would be. I had been a dick, but I was back with Jacob as the saint who forgave me.
When he walked out onto the field with his team, Maya came to stand next to me.
“It’s great to see that you’re friends again,” she said.
I nodded.
The Sharks were a fantastic team to watch. They were preparing for a game to kick off the new season, and watching the dynamic between them was something else. When they played in the leagues and I saw them on TV, it was a thing of poetry to watch, but no one saw the relationships between the players or the true dynamic of the teams. From where I stood on the side of the field, I saw for the first time how well they worked together, how close they were to each other and how perfectly Jacob fit in.
I couldn’t believe I hadn’t been happy for him. I had been so bitter that I hadn’t been chosen to play professional football that I had forgotten about the happiness of the people I loved.
Maya looked at me. “How are you doing?” she asked.
“Much better,” I said.
It was true: it was hard for me to watch them play, because I knew what it was like to be a part of a team. But I could see passed that now. I would get used to standing on the sidelines, because I had realized that it was better than not being a part of football at all.
Maya and I stayed to watch the full training session. When the guys finished, they trailed off to the locker room in twos and threes. Jacob stayed behind to chat with the coach first before he walked toward us.
“What did you think?” Jacob asked me.
“You looked great out there,” I said. “It’s a great team.”
Jacob nodded. “It is. It was a little sticky when I first joined them, but it’s different now. I finally feel like I’m one of the boys.”
“It shows,” I said. “You’re all set for the game.”
Jacob nodded, looking out over the fields.
“I have a box reserved at Hard Rock if you’re interested in watching the game,” Jacob said. He glanced at me, unsure.
I looked at Maya, who nodded encouragement.
“That would be great,” I said.
Jacob smiled, relieved as if he’d expected me to say no. Until now, it was all I’d done, but this was the first step to changing that.
“Kina will be there with a few of our friends, if you don’t mind,” Jacob added. Again he looked unsure. I had been a recluse lately.
“It’s not a problem,” I said.
Jacob grinned at me, ecstatic. This was the first step forward. No more being alone, no more being a dick about everything I couldn’t have, no more punishing Jacob for something that wasn’t his fault. It would take a while for everything to go back to normal, for me to fix the damage I had caused, but I could make it happen. Everyone was on my side, eager to help me out. It was all I needed. I was so grateful I had people in my life that wouldn’t give up on me, no matter how much of an asshole I had been.
After training, I had to get back to work. I had taken a few hours off, but I had to make them up. I stayed later to make sure I caught everything up before I headed home. After that, the drive home didn’t take long since it was well after the rush hour traffic was gone, so the roads had quieted down. Where usually I was in a bad mood after a long day’s work, I was in a good mood now. Maya was at home, waiting for me. For the first time in years, I had something to look forward to.
I wasn’t going to go home and drink, either. I had better things to do with my life now.
When I arrived home, I noticed Jacob’s car in a parking space. It was unexpected, but I didn’t dread the idea that he was waiting for me. I walked to the front door and opened it.
Maya, Kina and Jacob were in the living room, drinking coffee, talking and laughing. When I stepped into the living room, the conversation died down. Maya stood up and walked to me, kissing me full on the mouth.
“I invited Jacob and Kina to stay for dinner,” she said. Her eyes asked me if I minded.
“That sounds great,” I said.
Maya smiled, relieved. She nodded and walked to the kitchen. With the open plan layout, she could prepare dinner and still be a part of the conversation.
“I’m glad you’re here actually,” I said to Jacob and Kina when I put down my briefcase. “I wanted to talk to you both anyway.”
Kina and Jacob glanced at each other, a look I knew all too well. What is he going to do this time?
“I want to apologize,” I said.
They both looked at me. Kina was surprised, and Jacob wasn’t far behind.
“I know this isn’t the first time,” I soldiered on. “It looks like I make mistakes a few times before I learn my lesson. But here I am, again, trying to tell you I’m sorry.”
“You don’t have to apologize,” Kina said.
I shook my head. “No, I do. And I want to. I have been horrible lately. I tried before to be civilized about it and failed. But this time
, everything is different.” I looked at Kina. “You didn’t give up on me. Since the moment everything crashed down around me, you were there for me, helping me out of a hole no matter how far I sank. I can’t tell you how much you mean to me and how happy I am to call you my sister.”
Kina smiled at me. She was getting emotional. “You know I’ll never give up on you,” she said.
“I know. I saw. And I’m sorry I gave up— on me and on you. That won’t happen again. You saved me from a very dark spot when I didn’t know how to get myself out of it.”
Kina stood and walked over to me, giving me a hug. I held onto my sister and realized how lucky I was. I glanced at Maya over Kina’s shoulder, and saw she was smiling at me.
“Jacob,” I said when Kina had let go and made her way back to her seat again.
“I’ve been a shitty friend. I’m sorry. I should have been happy for you when your dream came true. Instead, I was a complete dick about it. You have been the best friend a guy could ever ask for, and I appreciate that you never stopped trying, no matter how much of an ass I was.”
“Hey, we stick together, right?” Jacob said.
I nodded. “We do. From this moment on, I won’t let you down again.”
“I’m just glad to have you back,” Jacob said. Kina reached for Jacob, and he took her hand, squeezing it.
Maya was done in the kitchen, and she joined us in the living room again. I lifted my arm, and she took her place next to me, her body pushed tightly against mine. I dropped a kiss on her hair.
“And Maya,” I said. “Thank you for holding on even when there was no reason to. You’re my light. You have no idea how dark my world was before you stepped into it. Both times.”
She smiled, and I kissed her.
“Get a room,” Jacob called, and we laughed. It was great having my family with me again, to have them back. I hadn’t realized how lonely I had become, how isolated I had made myself. No one deserved to be as lonely as I was, and no one deserved to be treated the way I’d treated my friends and family. It would still take some time before I was back where I needed to be, but with people like Jacob, Kina and Maya in my life, I knew I would make it through. When they refused to give up on me, who was I to give up on myself?
