by Mary Monroe
“Y’all don’t eat none, then. That means more for us,” Janet said, speaking for the first time since the night before.
Ernest speared the other hind leg. He didn’t talk much, but he had been smiling a lot in the past couple of days. Mainly because Seth had made so many attempts to include him in the various conversations.
Seth and I left the table first. We had to leave for the airport soon after breakfast tomorrow morning, so we had a good excuse to turn in shortly after dinner.
Right after I entered my bedroom, my cell phone rang. It was Uncle Albert calling from Berkeley.
“I meant to call you sooner,” I told him. “But we’ve been so busy since we got here.”
“Did Seth freak out when he met Ernest and Janet?”
“Not at all.”
“You sound mighty odd. Is he nearby?”
“That’s right.”
“Then let me do most of the talking. He seemed all right with them, huh?”
“Oh yes.”
“Neither one of them did anything strange in front of Seth?”
“No, and I’m sure they won’t. Now I have to go so I can get some more of my packing done.” I didn’t give Uncle Albert time to say anything else before I hung up.
“Who was that?” Seth asked.
“Uncle Albert. He just wanted to say hello.” I shut the door before I continued. “Uh, he doesn’t speak to Mama or anybody else down here, except every now and then. I don’t think him and Mama have spoken since last year, when he called to wish her a Merry Christmas. It’s a damn shame. He’s the only brother she has left. I guess you noticed that his name didn’t come up much.”
“No, I didn’t notice. Why does he not get along with the family?”
“Honey, my folks are so old school, they can’t deal with gay people. They don’t think being gay is normal.”
Seth let out such a profound gasp, it sounded like somebody was strangling him. As soon as he composed himself, he looked at me and shook his head. “They can’t deal with gay people? But what about . . . I mean, uh, your sister and brother are not exactly normal, either.”
“That’s true. They can’t help the way they are, but my family is convinced that Uncle Albert chose to be gay.”
“I don’t think Albert chose to be gay. And the same goes for Janet and Ernest. They didn’t choose to be, uh, the way they are, either.”
“Honey, I’m glad you and I are on the same page. Thank you for being so nice to my family and for not freaking out over Ernest’s and Janet’s behavior.” I gave Seth a quick kiss on his cheek.
“I have to say that this has been an interesting experience,” he said, raking his fingers though his hair. “It’s almost like being in a foreign country.”
“I know what you mean. I felt that way about California until I got used to it. But I hope we’ll visit Alabama at least once a year after we get married. That’ll help you get used to the lifestyle. You just might want to move down here for good when we get old and retire.”
The next morning, around eight, we all gathered at the kitchen table for our last breakfast together. A few minutes later, Aunt Hattie arrived so she could spend a little more time with Seth and me. Janet ate in silence and scowled at Seth across the table every few minutes.
“Janet, it’s not nice to give folks dirty looks,” Aunt Hattie said, shaking a finger at my sister. But Janet ignored her and continued to stare at Seth with that unpleasant look on her face. I could tell it was making him very uncomfortable by the way he kept shifting in his seat and clearing his throat. “Seth is going to be part of the family soon.”
“Uh-uh! No, he ain’t! He ain’t going to be no part of this family!” Janet shrieked.
“Janet, if you can’t behave, you can take your plate and go finish eating in your bedroom or out on that porch, with them gnats buzzing over your plate,” Mama said. Then she turned to Seth. “Son, she’s on a new medication, and it makes her talk crazy sometimes. Don’t pay her no mind, you hear?”
Seth gave me a helpless look, but he managed to nod and smile.
Our flight was leaving at 12:30 p.m., and we had about an hour’s drive back to the airport, so we left the breakfast table to get ready. It was raining out, so Seth insisted that we leave a half hour earlier than planned. “In case we have car trouble or run into heavy traffic because of the weather,” he said as we finished our packing. What he said next stunned me. “This whole experience of coming down here to these backwoods and being around people who eat possums and duck eggs has been too strange for me. At first, it was like visiting a foreign country, but now it feels like I’m on another planet. I . . . I can’t wait to get up out of this place.”
“Oh. I didn’t know you thought it was that bad,” I said, folding my arms and moving toward the bed. His comments were harsh but honest, and that made me sad. Apparently, the culture shock he had been experiencing was more severe than I’d thought. “If you had said something before now, we could have left a day earlier. I guess we won’t be moving here when we retire, huh?” I sat down, and Seth quickly sat next to me.
“I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings, baby. I didn’t mean to. It’s just that, well, I’m a city boy.”
I nodded. “I know you are, Seth. And I don’t want you to change. I want you to stay just the way you are.” When I put my arms around him and kissed his lips, his body stiffened like a piece of wood.
Chapter 6
Seth
IT HAD BEEN ALMOST A MONTH SINCE RACHEL AND I HAD RETURNED from Alabama.
I waited until the second day in April to tell her we should not set a definite date for our wedding. Just as I had expected, she agreed with me. I had used “I want my fledgling ad agency business to be a little more secure first” as an excuse. It pleased me to know that I still had Rachel in the palm of my hand and that I was still very much in control.
“You have a point, honey. Starting a marriage and a business too close together could cause some problems,” she said. “Don’t worry. We’ll know when the time is right for us to get married.”
While everything appeared to be normal, that could not have been further from the truth. I had decided to end my relationship with Rachel, and I knew it was going to be hard. But I had convinced myself that one way to make things easier was for me to focus my attention on another woman. A brand-new relationship would ease my pain. It didn’t take me long to find a replacement for Rachel. My new woman literally landed in my lap.
I rarely used public transportation, but on this particular day I had a breakfast date with an old friend from school who worked in downtown Frisco. I knew from experience that driving across the Bay Bridge during the commute hours, then having to find a decent place to park, was not a pleasant experience. Since my buddy worked in the financial district, one block from a rapid transit station, I decided to take the Bay Area Rapid Transit train, better known as BART, into the city. I boarded at the North Berkeley station.
At the very next stop, a petite young woman with skin the color of honey got on, and I noticed her right away. She wore a navy blue suit with a white silk blouse, and she had a briefcase in her hand. Her short auburn hair was in a cute pixie style, complete with bangs, which made her heart-shaped face look almost angelic. After a couple more station stops, the train got so crowded, people were pushing and shoving like nobody’s business. When the train stopped suddenly, the lovely woman I had been admiring stumbled backward and landed in my lap!
“Oh, I’m so sorry,” she said, immediately rising. She was not the only thing “rising.” I got an immediate hard-on.
“I’m not,” I told her, smiling as I looked into her big brown eyes. “I’m getting off at the next stop, so you can stay right where you are.”
“I don’t think so,” she said, giving me the kind of look my mother used to give me when I said something inappropriate.
“Then why don’t you sit? I’ll stand the rest of the way,” I said, already on my feet.
“Thank you.” She sat down and immediately began to read a newspaper, which was what almost every other person was doing. For the next few minutes, I was so engrossed in the sports section of the San Francisco Chronicle newspaper, I didn’t realize that the train had reached my destination.
“Isn’t this your stop?”
I turned to see that it was the beautiful young woman who was talking to me. “Oh! Thank you.” We both got off the train and began to walk toward the same escalator. “Um, I hope I didn’t sound too forward back there.”
“You did, but that’s all right.” She chuckled. “I’m Darla Woodson.”
“I’m Seth Garrett. Do you work nearby?”
She nodded. “The savings and loan a block from here.”
“Are you a bank teller?”
“I’m a loan manager. Well, it was nice talking to you.” I was surprised when she grabbed my hand and shook it. “Maybe I’ll see you around again.”
“I’m having breakfast with a friend, but I sure would like to see you again. Maybe we could meet somewhere for coffee someday? Do you live in Berkeley?”
“I live on Alcatraz Avenue, and yes, I would like to meet for coffee someday.”
Darla and I exchanged phone numbers, and I called her the next day. One of the first things she told me was that she was not involved with anyone.
“I wish I could say that,” I began. “You see, there is someone, but I’m going to end the relationship very soon. She’s . . . she’s got some emotional problems, so I have to ease out of the relationship very slowly and very gently.”
“I see. The guy I just broke up with had some emotional issues, too, so I can relate. It took me a whole year to break it off with him. And it is one thing I hope I never have to go through again.”
“I feel you. My lady friend is so fragile, I’m afraid she might try something desperate if I don’t handle things right. But life goes on.”
Life did go on for me. And in a way that I had never expected.
Within a month, I was madly in love with Darla. Unfortunately, the first time we made love it was a letdown, because I couldn’t remain erect long enough to please her, or myself. I knew it was the guilt I was feeling. Each time Rachel said or did something I didn’t like, I didn’t feel as guilty. By the end of the third month, I was so into Darla, I knew that she was the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I had told her about Rachel’s nutty family and about how Rachel had kept that information from me for so long. Darla understood my concerns completely. Was it possible that she was just as docile and as willing to please me as Rachel? I wondered. If so, I had hit the jackpot twice.
It had been four months since the trip to Alabama, and not once had Rachel or I brought up the subject of her family’s problems. She was so busy planning our future that she hadn’t noticed how my demeanor had changed.
Other people had noticed that I had begun to act differently. Last night, when Rachel’s uncle Albert came to the apartment, he’d made some disturbing comments.
“Seth, what’s up, dude? You haven’t cracked a smile since I came in that door two hours ago. With that long face and those bags under your eyes, you look like dog shit! Running a business must really be hard on you.”
“Yeah, running a business is not easy,” I’d replied, wishing he’d leave or mind his own business. “We’re still smoothing out some rough edges.”
“He’s just working too hard,” Rachel had said, caressing my neck. Albert was so brazen, he always made himself at home when he made one of his unexpected visits, which were too frequent and too long for me. He had just poured himself his third double shot of vodka and had flopped down on the love seat, facing Rachel and me on the couch. She’d refilled my wineglass. “But don’t worry about my boo, Uncle Albert. I’m taking real good care of him.”
“Well, excuse me,” Albert said with a neck roll. This man went out of his way to let the world know he was gay. On this particular night he wore a black cape over a skintight red jumpsuit. With his big brown eyes, high cheekbones, and bow-shaped lips, he was just as “pretty” as Rachel. He smoothed back his wavy brown hair and took a long drink. After he let out a mild belch, he continued. “Dude, I have a friend who works for a real estate company on Shattuck. They have been listing some fantastic properties lately. One in particular has a two-car garage and a huge backyard for the future kiddies to roam around in!”
“We can wait,” Rachel said. “Things are really heating up at my job, so I’m not sure I want to start a family too soon. I just got a promotion, and it wouldn’t do me much good if I had to take off on maternity leave too soon.” Rachel turned to me when she heard me gasp. “What’s wrong, baby? You look like you just saw a ghost.”
“I’m fine. Just a little heartburn,” I lied, rubbing my chest for emphasis. I coughed to clear my throat, which was so dry and inflamed, it felt like I had just swallowed a ball of fire. “Thanks for the information, Albert. Rachel’s right. There is no need for us to start our family too soon.”
“Well, y’all know what’s best, but when you do get ready to look for a big enough place, just let me know,” Albert said. He stood up and let out another belch and glanced at his watch. “I hate to run, but I have to meet my baby at the country club, and y’all know how Kingston complains when I’m late.”
Two minutes after Albert rushed out the door, I raised my arms and yawned. Then, very casually, I said to Rachel, “Sweetheart, I’m glad you feel the way you do.”
“About what?”
“About us slowing things down a bit. Us having kids especially . . .”
She nodded. “We’re both still very young. Even if we wait five more years after we get married to become parents, we’ll still be fairly young by the time our kids are ready for college.”
“Uh, yeah. I don’t have a problem with that. But I’ve been thinking about something else, too. Now that we both agree that waiting to have children is a smart thing to do, why not hold off a little while on the wedding, too?”
Maybe it was my imagination, but as soon as I said that, Rachel looked somewhat relieved.
She still gave me a surprised and glassy-eyed look, though. “How long?” she asked.
“Not too long. Now that you’ve been promoted to head bookkeeper, you’ll probably have to spend more time at work, and that can put a lot of stress on you and our relationship. And you know how busy things are with me at work right now. I’m wooing some serious clients, and I need to be able to give them my undivided attention.”
Rachel stood up, positioned herself in front of me, and eased down into my lap. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but you took a load off my mind by suggesting we delay the wedding.”
“Huh?”
“Honey, I didn’t know how to bring up the subject of us delaying the wedding for a little while longer. But you’re right. I am going to be very busy for a while and stressed out for sure. The girl they hired to do my old job and be my assistant is not too bright, so it’s going to take some time for me to train her properly. Besides that, I’d like to lose a couple of dress sizes before the wedding.” After Rachel planted a quick kiss on my cheek, she added, “What if we wait until next year? Even a little longer, if we have to. You know I love you from the bottom of my heart and I’m not going anywhere. And I know you’re not, either.”
I nodded. “Next year sounds wonderful, honey.” I wanted to kiss Rachel’s feet, but I settled for her lips. I gave her the most passionate French kiss I could manage. She had no idea how easy she had made things for me!
Chapter 7
Rachel
THE MONTHS SLID BY, AND THINGS WERE LOOKING BETTER AND BETTER for Seth and me. By the time 2001 rolled around, I had received two hefty salary increases since my promotion at the prestigious private middle school I worked for as a bookkeeper. Seth had twice as many clients as the year before, so the ad agency that he had started on a shoestring budget was doing very well. Even though we were more financially secure than ever
, our marriage was still on hold. We didn’t mention setting a date that often anymore, and there was really no need to. We had pretty much decided that we’d do it sometime toward the end of the year or early the next year, but no later.
In February, on a Thursday a few days after Valentine’s Day, Uncle Albert called me up around 7:00 p.m. I had just come home from the market and still had the grocery bag in my hand. I smiled when I saw my uncle’s name on the caller ID. That smile didn’t stay on my face long. What he had to say made my heart skip several beats.
“Baby girl, I’m in trouble, and I need your help real bad,” he whimpered. The tone of his voice gave me enough reason to be concerned.
“I just got home. Let me put the groceries away and take off my sweater,” I said. “I’ll call you back in a few minutes—”
“Please don’t hang up on me, baby!” Uncle Albert interrupted. “I need your help!”
“Calm down, Unc. Hold on for a few seconds.” My heart was already leaping around in my tightening chest like a rabbit on crack. Uncle Albert had never asked me for help before. I set the grocery bag on the coffee table and removed my sweater with my other hand. Then I sat down hard on the couch and crossed my legs. “What kind of trouble are you in?” I was sorry that the telephone cord was not long enough for me to get up and walk across the room to the liquor cabinet so I could pour myself a drink. I had a feeling I was going to need one.
“Kingston found out I spent Valentine’s Day night with somebody else, and he went off on me this evening. He accused me of cheating on him.”
“Were you?”
“Girl, you know me. I can’t help myself when it comes to cute young things.”
“Excuse me for saying this, but if you were cheating and Kingston found out, why are you so upset? Since he’s footing most of the bills, I think he should be the one who’s upset.”
“Oh, he is upset, too! But that’s beside the point! To make a long story short, he got all up in my face and sucker punched me. I sucker punched him back. Next thing I know, that wild-ass Jap comes at me with some of his kung fu moves. His foot felt like a sledgehammer when he slammed it against my face. I freaked out and ran out the door. Well, I tripped on the steps and fell and broke my leg in two places. Shit! I’m at the hospital, with my leg in a cast!” Uncle Albert started screaming like a banshee. “Aaarrggh! Aaarrggh!”
