by Mary Monroe
“I’m going to pray for Albert and for you, too,” Mama told me. “If you do move to California, don’t you eat nothing Albert or one of his boyfriends cook. You don’t know where their hands been.”
The day I boarded the plane was one of the most exciting days of my life. Uncle Albert had already arranged to take the day off from work so he could pick me up at the airport in San Francisco and drive me to his apartment in Berkeley.
The moment I set foot on California soil, I felt like I had been reborn.
Chapter 31
Rachel
AS SOON AS I GOT SETTLED INTO MY NEW LOCATION, UNCLE ALBERT taught me how to use a lot of different software, so I had no trouble landing temp office jobs. I made a lot of new friends right away, and before long I was enjoying my life again.
I didn’t do much socializing. I joined my new friends for drinks after work every once in a while, but my main focus was on my future. I dated a few guys along the way, but I made sure they all knew I was not interested in anything too serious at the time. Most of the men didn’t have a problem with that as long as they got what they wanted, which was a little company that included sex now and then. That was the extent of my “love life.”
I took a twelve-week business course at a community college in nearby Oakland, and a week after I completed it, I landed a permanent job as the assistant bookkeeper at Steele-Royce, a private school in one of Berkeley’s most prestigious areas. It was a job to die for. The midsize white stucco building had all the luxuries that money could buy, and these included state-of-the-art furniture and electronic equipment, and an indoor swimming pool. I even had an office all to myself. There were only two hundred seventh- and eighth-grade students, all from prominent families, including those of a few local celebrities. Some of the kids came to school in chauffeur-driven limousines. My salary and benefits were incredible, so I counted my blessings every day.
Lucy had been the head librarian at the school for a couple of years and the only black employee, other than one of the janitors. We were both in our twenties, so we hit it off immediately and quickly became best friends.
I was still living with Uncle Albert at the time, and even though he kept telling me I could stay as long as I wanted, I was anxious to move into a place of my own. For one thing, my uncle partied too much for me. Every other night he had company. Sometimes up to a dozen men at a time, including a drag queen who performed in one of the clubs in San Francisco that Uncle Albert often went to.
Lucy had a friend who managed a couple of apartment buildings, so she was able to help me move into the two-bedroom, second-floor apartment with a balcony on College Avenue. As soon as I got settled in, with cute furniture and trendy knickknacks that I’d picked up at secondhand stores and flea markets, Lucy and some of her friends began to try to hook me up with their single male friends. Even though it had been more than two years since my fiasco with Jeffrey, I was still somewhat gun-shy. I had told my friends about Jeffrey and what he had done to me. I’d even told them what I’d done to him.
“Too bad you didn’t hit him where it would have hurt the most—his crotch.” Lucy laughed.
Lucy, Paulette Ramsey, who was one of her closest friends, and I were having drinks at a bar in downtown Oakland, where Paulette worked as a personnel manager for a small insurance company.
“My cousin Bobby just got a divorce, and he likes to party. If I was still single, I’d go after him myself,” Paulette said.
“Thanks, but no thanks.” I chuckled.
“Girl, you need to forget about dude back in Alabama and get on with your life and get you some new meat,” Lucy scolded.
“I am over him,” I insisted. “And I do want to meet somebody special. But I’m in no hurry to taste any new meat.” It had been several weeks since I’d met and lost Matthew Bruner, the parole officer I’d had such high hopes for.
Lucy was the kind of woman who didn’t take no for an answer. She continued to try to set me up with men she knew. And I began to weaken. When Lucy finally told me about Seth Garrett, I was only slightly interested in meeting him, and I didn’t get my hopes up. But the more she talked about him, the better he sounded.
“Not only is he fine, but he’s from a fine family, too. And I don’t just mean in the looks department. His daddy, his brothers, and one of his aunts are lawyers. They live in this huge house in the hills,” she gushed.
“Oh? Why would a man with all that going for him want to meet a little old country girl like me?”
“I have to be up front and let you know that Seth has a little bit of baggage. He has a son by some hoochie mama who moved to L.A. a while back. She’s about as wretched as they come. That heifer has such a long reach, she’s still making his life a living hell, so he spends a lot of time down in the dumps. Especially lately. He’s a real cutie-pie, but he’s not as smart or ambitious as his brothers. He didn’t even finish high school, but he eventually got his GED and is supposedly taking some kind of business class and working a pooh-butt job in a cannery, of all places. ”
“The dude is a high school dropout who works in a cannery,” I mused. “And you want to dump this loser off on me?” I couldn’t stop myself from laughing.
“Seth is going to run his own ad agency someday. He’s working toward a real future. He goes to church occasionally, and he’s good to his mama. A man who treats his mama well usually treats his women well. Besides all that, I’ve already told him about you. If you don’t agree to meet him, it’ll make me look bad. I think he really needs a strong, smart, hardworking, sensible woman like you to help him stay afloat. . . .”
“Help him stay afloat? That doesn’t sound too appealing to me. I hope you didn’t make him think I was looking for a man to take care of. The last thing I need is a man who needs a mama, or a nursemaid, more than he needs a lover.”
“Girl, please! Do you want to meet the man or not?”
“I’ll meet him, but I’m letting you know now, I am not going to jump into anything with him anytime soon. Especially bed . . .”
“That’s good enough for me. Now, how about this Sunday? He’ll be attending church with his parents. I’ve already checked with him.”
“I guess that’s as good a time as any. But I’m telling you right now that if this Seth Garrett turns out to be another criminal like Skirt or looks like Godzilla, I’m holding you responsible.” I laughed again.
I didn’t laugh when I met Seth and his parents that Sunday in church. There was something about him that made me tingle all over.
After our first date, we immediately began to spend several nights a week together. I got so attached to him, I didn’t want him out of my sight.
A year into our relationship, I asked Seth to move in with me.
Uncle Albert adored Seth, and the feeling was mutual. Seth had even accompanied me to a few parties at Uncle Albert’s new residence. Uncle Albert had recently moved in with Kingston Takahashi, a small-framed, baby-faced Japanese American man in his early thirties, with shoulder-length black hair and lots of attitude. Kingston’s family owned several upscale restaurants in Japan, Singapore, and San Francisco. Once again my greedy, free-spirited uncle was being showered with gifts and treated like a prince by a man of means.
One Saturday night a few weeks after Seth moved in with me, he and I had dinner with my uncle and his new lover. While Seth was in the living room with Kingston, admiring some of the artwork he had picked up on his last trip to Japan, Uncle Albert and I were in the elaborate master bedroom in their three-bedroom apartment a few blocks from UC Berkeley, where Kingston was a professor of political science.
“Girl, you’ve struck black gold,” Uncle Albert whispered. “I used to read in the newspaper about Seth’s daddy and all the high-profile cases he’d won over the years before he retired. The Garretts might not be as rich as some of the other families in their neighborhood, but they’ve got more than me and you. Get what you can while the getting is good,” Uncle Albert advised me. “Milk
that cash cow dry.”
I gave my uncle a dismissive wave. “I don’t want to ‘milk that cash cow’ or any other cow. I can take care of myself without a man footing my bills,” I said firmly.
“What’s wrong with you, girl? These days, you have to take somebody before they take you. This is America, the land of opportunity, where any and everybody is out for all they can get. How do you think I got where I am today?”
“Yeah, but that man who was taking care of you back in Alabama was not too happy with you when you snuck off and left him with a bunch of humongous bills.”
“So? He got what he wanted from me. I’m still getting what I want from my men. I’ve got money in the bank, credit cards I don’t even have to pay for, a generous allowance, and I live in a pad that most people would kill for. I couldn’t have done all this by myself on my pooh-butt secretary salary.”
I shook my head. “I would never take advantage of Seth like that. Or any other man, for that matter. If you’d stop eating steak and lobster three times a week and shopping at Neiman Marcus, you could do all right by yourself.”
“Hell’s bells, girl! You and your Dollar Tree–shopping, buy-one-get-one-free, coupon-clipping self. You’re going to have a miserable life if you don’t wake up and smell the bubbly, girl. You straight people sure have some warped ideas when it comes to love, romance, and finances.”
I had already decided that I would never let my uncle know that I was the one footing most of the bills for me and Seth. I didn’t mind being generous with my money, because I truly believed that Seth was a good investment in my future.
Chapter 32
Seth
IT WAS BECAUSE OF RACHEL THAT I HAD BECOME A CHANGED MAN, and everybody could see that. Some of the same people who had lost faith in me were now helping me make improvements in my life, some with apprehension, though. A couple of weeks ago, the only time in years that my stingy, smug brother Damon had loaned me money, he’d made me sign a promissory note! I’d been flabbergasted, but I’d signed it, anyway. When I didn’t repay the loan when I’d said I would, he’d threatened to take me to The People’s Court. I had had to scramble around to borrow the money from several of my friends. Then they had all hounded me until I’d paid them back.
My parents had reluctantly loaned me money a couple of times in the past few months, and then they’d stayed on my case until I’d paid them back. That well dried up real fast. Last week they turned me down when I asked for another loan, even though I offered to pay them back with interest.
“We’ve already spent thousands of dollars on your behalf, son. It’s time for you to be more self-sufficient, and you’ll never get to that point as long as somebody keeps coming to your rescue,” Mother told me.
I sulked, even though I knew they were right. They had fed and clothed me, and they had put spending money in my pocket long enough. And even though I had a job, they had allowed me to live at home rent free for years.
I was on my own now, and even with Rachel’s financial assistance, I was still struggling. The main reason I was struggling so hard was that my son’s mother was so greedy and extravagant. I continued to send her as much money as I could to keep her off my back. But I also had some pretty expensive tastes of my own. I liked fine wine, expensive clothes, and regular excursions to the casinos.
I wished that Rachel had never told me about the generous paychecks she brought home every other week, not to mention the numerous high-limit credit cards she had but rarely used. The minute she revealed that information to me, and knowing how sweet she was, I immediately heard the ka-ching of a cash register. Now I had somebody else I could borrow money from! I didn’t want to get too greedy with her too soon. She was already doing more for me than anybody else. So I still got what I could from other sources.
Josh was one of the most intelligent and sensible men I knew. But my brother was quite soft and gullible when it came to me. He had always been my ace in the hole. However, I didn’t like to fall back on him unless I really had to. He owned a town house a few miles from our parents’ house, but I didn’t like to go there often. For one thing, his wife, Faith, and I didn’t really get along that well. A few years ago, I had briefly dated one of her cousins. When I broke up with her, she and Faith joined forces and trashed me for weeks to their whole family. That was the reason I went to Josh’s posh office on University Avenue this particular Thursday afternoon.
“What do you need the money for this time?” he asked, adjusting his red tie and brushing off the sleeve of his expensive navy blue suit jacket. He must have owned more suits than Armani. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d seen him wear the same suit more than once. He had already pulled out his checkbook.
“Uh, Caroline called me up and told me that Darnell needs some dental work done,” I lied. Well, that was only half a lie. I did need to help Caroline pay for Darnell’s dental work, but I also had some gambling debts that I needed to pay off. As generous and sympathetic as Josh was in my case, he probably would have given me the money no matter what I told him it was for. But I didn’t want to take that chance. And I didn’t want him to know just how frivolous and irresponsible I still was.
“I have to say that I am proud of you, baby bro. You’ve really stepped up to the plate with your son. It’s a damn shame Caroline won’t let us see more of Darnell. I would like for my daughter to get to know him someday.”
“I’m working on that, Josh.”
“Well, you keep working on that and your goals.” Not only did Josh give me the grand I’d asked for, but he also threw in an extra five hundred, which I didn’t have to pay back. “As long as you are trying to do something with your life now, I will help you,” he told me, looking me straight in the eye, like he was trying to see through me. His penetrating gaze didn’t bother me, because I was used to it. “Now we need to do something about that half-assed job of yours at that damn cannery! I know you don’t have much of an education, but I know you can do a lot better than that. You need a job with a better salary, medical benefits, profit sharing, and all the other benefits!”
I hated it when Josh talked to me like I was still a child. But it was a small price to pay to keep him happy enough so he’d continue to help me out. “I’ve been going on interviews. I expect a callback from Charles Schwab any day. I really am looking for a better job,” I said in the most humble tone of voice I could manage.
“You need to look harder. My goodness. It was bad enough you dropped out of high school and had to get a GED, and then you fiddled around in a community college.”
“I had planned to take advantage of some military opportunities—”
Josh threw up his hands and gave me an incredulous look. “Boy, puh-leeze! You told me about that, but you never followed through on it.”
“I did talk to a recruiter, but the military didn’t want me, because I have flat feet,” I whined.
“You’d better trot those flat feet to a few employment agencies and get your act together. There are decent jobs out there if you know where to look. Immigrants come here from all over the world and get jobs left and right. Americans have every advantage in the world.”
“I know that.” I didn’t expect Charles Schwab to call me back for a job in their mail room, nor did I expect to hear from any of the other places I’d sent my résumé to. I didn’t really care if they did or not. I had big plans, and each day I got a little closer to fulfilling my dreams. “Josh, as you know, my goal is to have my own advertising business. I think it’d make more sense for me to stay with the cannery until then. Besides, why should I waste my time learning a new job at another place when I’d have to leave as soon as I get my business off the ground?”
“If you change your mind and want me to put in a word for you with some of my contacts so you can get the hell up out of that cannery, just let me know. And, you can pay back the loan whenever you can. . . .”
Rachel was like a mother to me in so many ways. She pampered me to death, and I e
njoyed every minute of it. She was spoiling me even more than I already was. After the long, lingering baths I took, she cleaned out the bathtub. After my baths, she liked to give me back rubs and foot massages. Last Saturday, while she cleaned up the mess in the living room that a couple of my buddies and I had made the night before, she allowed me to sleep in. Then she served me breakfast in bed.
“Baby, if you don’t watch yourself, you’re going to make me marry you,” I teased that morning, as I enjoyed the cheese grits, grilled ham, toast, and poached eggs she had just set in front of me on a platter.
She smiled. “Is that a proposal?” she asked with a shy look on her lovely face. Even without make-up, and with her long black hair in two braids, this girl looked like a film star to me.
I sat up straight and gave her a serious look. “It could be. But first I’d have to get myself in better shape so I can be a good provider. I want to be in a position where I can take care of a wife and the children I hope to have.”
“I want to be a good wife and mother. But taking care of a family is a lot of hard work. And one thing I want you to know right now is that I don’t expect the man I marry to carry the load by himself.”
“I thought today’s women wanted to live the easy life and let their husbands take care of them.”
“I do. But I want to be a partner to my man, not a liability. My husband and I will take care of each other. I want my man to know up front that I am not going to be totally dependent on him. I have a good job, and I’m going to move up even more. I love working, and I plan to do so until I’m old enough to retire.”
Like I said, Rachel was spoiling me. I didn’t want to marry the kind of woman that my brothers and some of my friends had married. I was pleased to hear that she was so eager to pull her load. I was convinced that she was a superwoman in her own right. She could work full-time, maintain her looks and shape, keep me happy in the bedroom, and raise our children as well as Mother had raised my brothers and me. The idea of marrying her was getting sweeter and sweeter. . . .
