“Your actions conveyed affection,” she said.
“Never doubt this. I care for you.” His voice lowered to a growl.
“How much?” There. She’d given him no quarter.
“What bloody nonsense is this? You’re wanting me to put a measure on our . . . friendship?” He grew more angry. His cheeks puffed as he bellowed.
“All right. Never mind. Answer me this. Where do we go from here?”
His eyes grew wide with confusion. “What do you mean? We go back to England. I will escort you home.”
She pushed further. “And then what?”
His eyes narrowed. He rested his fists on his hips. “Then I leave you in the care of your fine father. You may think he does not want you, but he does.”
“And then?”
“And then you live a happy life as a Marquess’s daughter,” he shouted.
“That’s what I thought.” No matter how much she wished it otherwise, his blunt comment told her exactly what she wanted to know. He was leaving her. Dropping her in her father’s lap and she would never hear from him again.
No. She would not allow him to just walk out of her life.
She swung her hair over her shoulder. “And you will go to your home?”
“I will go to my uncle’s house. I need to see what mischief my sister has created.”
The mention of his sister gave her the idea to try another approach. “I have a sister too. Would you like to meet her?”
“I suppose if she’s there when I take you home I will exchange pleasantries, but I doubt I will meet your family. They will be too busy welcoming you back to care who brought you.”
“I care.”
Silence.
“Will you come to visit me?” She bit her lip. “Will you call on me?”
“I have more mending to do.” His gaze softened. “I imagine once my aunt gets her hands on me, I’ll be holed up for a spell. I’ll have to mollify her.” His expression turned angry. “Then I’ll be back to sailing. You will forget me.”
He spoke as though he needed to convince himself.
“Is that what you want?”
“I love the sea, I told you that,” his voice gruff again. “The sea holds my heart.”
And he will never give his heart to me.
“As you said, you need to heal and gather your strength before you take to a ship again.”
“All right.” He placed a hand on each hip. “I’m a man of plain speaking. So I’ll not discredit you for your intelligence and I’ll not degrade you by lying. You are a Marquess’s daughter. You’ve already had one dispute with your father over an unsuitable match. I will not be responsible for another.”
When she opened her mouth, he held up his hand. “You asked, let me finish. I do not have a lofty title and I damn sure do not adhere to society. I am a captain. A battle and bruised one at the moment. I have scars, Jenny. Scars on the inside that may not heal.”
“Let me help you.” She took a step forward. When he glared, she stopped in her tracks.
“I will give an allotted time for my bones and wounds to heal properly. Then I plan to sail back to India.”
Her gasp echoed and bounced off the cabin walls. “You can’t. You can’t mean to go back.”
“I do and I will.”
“Revenge!” she spat.
“Yes, revenge.” He clenched his fists.
She thought he’d been angry before? Pure rage crossed his features. He harbored such fury, his body shook with it.
“Stephen, you can’t.” She closed the distance between them. “Please, I beg you. No.”
So many emotions crossed his face, she knew he battled countless demons. How could she allow him to sail back to India when he could very well meet the same fate—or worse? And she would not be there to save him. Several moments passed while she waited, her heart in her throat. She prayed he would see reason.
“Please, don’t push me away.” Tears filled her eyes. God help her, but she wanted him, needed him. She cared for him, more than she dared allow herself to admit.
Finally his fingers opened and his body slackened. Tight lines on his brow relaxed to smooth his features.
He pulled her close. “All right, Jenny. Don’t worry. Let’s get home. Think of our family, for now.”
After some time, he released his hold and leaned back. “Your life is very different from mine. You will attend parties and balls . . . you’ll be so busy you won’t even miss me.”
If Jenny had learned anything the last few years, one thing was to save an argument for another day when the battle could be won. She would not give up. Why couldn’t the lout just admit he cared for her?
Stephen may not know it yet, but he would not leave her. She would see to it.
“You don’t look too happy.”
Stephen shook the troubled thoughts from his mind. “Women.”
Giles slapped him on the back of one shoulder. “The complexity of their gender is the agony of man’s existence. But we need the female species for our survival.”
“Need?” With one brow raised, Stephen faced Giles.
“Reproduction,” Giles clarified.
“Oh.” Stephen stared at the white caps rippling across the ocean under the moon’s reflection. “Damned unreasonable.”
“You have a disagreement with our lady passenger?” The smirk on his face conveyed he already knew the answer.
“You mean the Marquess’s daughter?”
Giles whistled through his teeth. “I take it you had no idea.”
“Of course not. A woman living alone in a shack on the other side of the world? Would you have guessed?”
“I don’t suppose I would have, no. But what does that have to do with anything?”
Stephen spun in anger. “The woman is a bloody aristocrat. A matriarch, for God’s sake.”
“Who is she,” Giles asked completely bewildered.
“The Marquess of Salisbury.”
“Hmmm.” Giles faced changed with recognition. “I see your point. But, at the risk of repeating myself, what does that have to do with anything?”
“Of course, you would say that. You’re a bloody duke.”
“Why would her father’s position be a problem?”
Stephen turned to face Giles. “Her father is a very important member of the aristocracy. When we get back to England, Jennifer will be a member of the aristocracy. Every blueblood will be knocking at her door.”
“Is that what has you worried? All you need do is set the gentlemen straight. Tell the dandies she’s spoken for.”
“I am a captain. I sail the seas. Or at least I did. How can I compete with nobility?”
“You’re not a man one can ignore. Jennifer seems quite taken with you. I dare say your station will not matter.”
“It’ll bloody well matter to her father. He did not approve of her first husband, who was a second son. I have no lofty title.”
“Your uncle is also an important man.”
Stephen leaned his forearms on the rail. “But, that’s not me.”
Giles leaned on the rail beside him. “I understand your apprehension. I can’t help but wonder if you place obstacles where there are none. The two of you may have had a quarrel, but I doubt she has the same concerns. She’s been living on her own. From what I see, she is more than capable of making her own decisions.”
“Oh, she is more than capable. And that is not what we argued about.” Stephen fisted his hands. “She doesn’t understand.”
Giles laughed out loud. “It’s the nature of the beast. Men think differently.” Giles shifted. “What does she not understand?”
Avoiding his question, Stephen also evaded his guilt.
; Guilt? Bah. Why should he be uneasy over a female’s point of view?
“She should empathize. Anyone would fathom a man’s need for retribution.”
“Ahhh. You plan to retaliate?”
Stephen stood to his full height. “The Rajput prince will pay for his horrendous deeds. He’s a monster.”
“In this case, I must side with the lady,” Giles said with a sigh.
“The hell you say.”
“I did not save you so I’d have to come looking for you all over again.”
“So you have no faith in me either.” Stephen turned away in disgust.
“Must I remind you of your sister?”
He’d taken three steps when Giles words stopped him cold. Stephen slowly turned, abhorrence biting at his insides. “You use Katherine as your weapon? To excuse your jumping into Jennifer’s camp?”
“Not a weapon. Motivation. If you refuse to be reasonable, I’ll use whatever means necessary.” Giles straightened, matching Stephen’s height.
“You have no reason to be so concerned with my affair.”
“I have several,” his voice deepened with conviction.
“Pray, list them.” He didn’t have to like what Giles said, but he would listen.
“All right.” Giles leaned his hip against the wood. “One. You have a beautiful woman who seems to like you in your skin. Two. The obvious. You barely escaped with your life. You were tortured, your men killed. The same could happen again. Nothing to do with your strength, your cunning, or your skills. Or the number of men you take with you. Life is a game of chance. And the odds are not in your favor.”
Stephen flexed his hands. Then braced his feet and crossed his arms. He may not intimidate the man, but the accustomed stance gave notable comfort.
“Three. You have a family waiting for you. I don’t think Katherine will be too happy if her brother returns to the same shark infested waters. Especially after moving heaven and earth to attain your rescue.”
“Do not waste your breath. You don’t know what that . . . bloody pig did to me. To my men,” Stephen snarled.
“I have a pretty good idea.” Giles shoved the hair from his face as he took a step forward. “You’re alive. Go live your life.”
Stephen’s gaze followed Giles across the moonlit deck. How easy for him to give advice. Which wasn’t exactly fair on Stephen’s part. He knew the man had, at some point in his life, experienced his own adversity.
Once more, Stephen leaned his forearms on the rail and gazed into the night. Glittering stars lit the dark sky. How he had longed for a swaying ship under his feet again, for the pitching sea to carry him across the endless ocean. Longed for peace and tranquility to fill his soul. But there would be no peace, no comfort until the dog paid for his offence.
The Rajput prince would burn in Hell.
Chapter 21
A feeling of déjà vu gripped Jennifer as she clung to the ship’s rail. The last time she’d seen the same commotion she’d been on a ship with her new husband, ready to leave her home. A lifetime ago. She looked down at the boisterous activity going on around her. The ship had docked early this morning. The sleepy-eyed town came alive with street vendors putting out their wares. The crew welcomed the early morning chill while they struggled with ropes as big as their arms, pulling and tugging. Men carried crates and unloaded cargo while passengers disembarked and were welcomed by their families.
Jennifer’s heart lurched. Family. Eager reunions took place on the dock below her. If she were meeting her family, would the reactions be similar. She placed her hands on the rail to keep them from shaking. She feared not.
As everyone else went about their business, Jennifer tried desperately to control her fear. Stephen, confident in his explanations, thought her family would welcome her with open arms. Even with his positive assurance, she could not help but feel powerless and vulnerable. She stared at the plank with dread. Ropes tied for balance, temptation urged her to jump. Since courage failed her, maybe someone would chuck her in the river. Wishful thinking.
What was to become of her? She would try to be strong. Really she would. She must. She could not hide like a scared rabbit. She’d survived the voyage. She was not about to turn coward now. Besides, she had nowhere else to go.
After much thinking, she reached the conclusion that she would endure this reunion and go through the motions that were expected. If her family threw her out, she’d deal with that when it happened. She could not help but wonder when, not if. For there was slim hope they would accept her back into their perfectly knit, unblemished household. Untarnished, until she committed an unforgivable sin.
She squared her drooping shoulders, and for a second time decided to meet her fate head on. Now, if she could just squash the choking sensation and find the courage to follow through.
Jennifer surveyed the crowd looking for Stephen. He’d departed to find transport and prepare any last minute arrangements. Only a few minutes passed before she spotted him. Taller than the others, his auburn hair stood out among the crowd. Her heart leaped at the sight of him. Then his eyes met hers. His searing gaze fired her blood, striking her numb. Her lungs were in desperate need of air.
Friend.
How could he even suggest such a thing? His stare devoured her. Most times he looked at her as if she wore no clothes. A heat began in her belly and flowed through her limbs. She wondered if he knew. If her own eyes might reflect her inner turmoil. He broke eye contact and bounded up the roped boards. She inhaled a deep breath and released it just as he approached.
“Are you ready?”
“As ready as I will ever be.”
He placed a hand at her elbow. “Come on.”
Stephen lifted Jennifer into the waiting carriage, then climbed inside to the seat across from her. He rapped on the roof of the coach, then sat back and stared at her in sufferable silence. She smoothed her skirts, adjusted her new bonnet, and then placed her hands firmly in her lap. Two seconds later she shifted her skirt, tapped her fingers on her knee, then played with the ribbon on her bonnet.
A cocky grin lifted a corner of his devilish mouth.
“I’m not a brainless nitwit.” She tilted her head toward the window. “I can’t help but be anxious.”
“You may fidget all you like.”
She looked up to see a smirk of arrogance on his face. He sat there with his arms crossed looking relaxed as the coach swayed back and forth.
“Easy for you.”
“Not so easy for me. I have demons still alive in my skull. I choose not to let them control my actions.”
“What a liar you are.”
He dropped his hands to his knees and glared. “I beg your pardon.”
“You plan to sail back to India. If that’s not allowing your emotions control . . .”
“Bad choice of words,” his hard voice interrupted. “However, my actions in the distant future is not relevant to the here and now. I will not discuss it. So choose another topic to speak of.”
Good Lord, he looked ferocious. If it were possible, his glare would bore holes right through her. Had she not known him, she would scuttle in fear. She sat straighter and clutched her skirt to keep her fingers still. It was maddening being confined to the carriage, considering the fact that every circle of the carriage wheel brought her closer to her fear.
“Do not look so alarmed.”
“Would you rather I shout in glee. ‘I’m home’,” she said in a raised voice. “I’m going to see my devoted parents and my adoring sister.” She gave him a look to match her sarcasm. “Is that better?”
“No.” His frown showed his displeasure.
“What do you expect? I’m terrified.”
He shifted in his seat and she thought he meant to join her. But he stayed where he was,
clearly uncomfortable. He ran a hand through his maze of glorious hair.
“You’re not a man to sugar coat your words. We are going to have a very long ride, if you don’t say what’s on your mind. ‘Spit it out’, as I’ve heard you say.”
“Damn. You try a man’s patience.”
“So you’ve told me before,” she replied curtly.
“You have nothing to fear. You are wrong. Your parents will fall all over you with hugs and kisses. If it makes you feel any better, in case they don’t, I will not leave you standing on their doorstep. I’ll stay with you until you find the truth of my words for your own stubborn self.”
“Stubborn?” Her hackles rose. “I’m not being stubborn by being realistic.”
“Realistic? Or cynic?”
“Don’t you think I have reason to be?”
“Jennifer.” He leaned forward and took her hand. “I admire your courage. The number of instances boggle my mind. The most recent one—you are about to face your family for the first time in years. True, you left under covert circumstances. But I dare say, your family loves you.” His gaze consumed her features from her hair to her eyes, to her nose, her chin—as if he committed every molecule to memory. “How could they not,” he said in a breathless whisper.
Her heart lurched against her ribcage. Her breath caught in her throat. When his scrutiny dropped again to her lips, she felt herself leaning forward, caught in a spell of timeless wonder.
“You tempt me beyond my ability, and I have no care to resist.” He closed the distance.
The True One (One and Only Series Book 2) Page 17
