by Marin Thomas
“Sure.”
That she trusted him to be alone with her daughter and believed he’d never let anything happen to Dani humbled him.
If she knew you’d associated with the gang who killed her daughter’s father, I doubt she’d be as trusting.
“I’ll tell Dani you’re waiting out here.”
“You’re welcome to come along.” To hell with his plan to keep his distance from Sara. They had less than forty-eight hours together.
“I need to keep packing.” She fled inside the house.
As soon as the door shut behind her, he kicked a rock across the road. He’d been fooling himself these past few weeks—living in a bubble with Sara, Dani and José. Pretending he wasn’t the man he really was.
The door opened and Dani dashed across the driveway. “Mama said you’re gonna take me to get ice cream.”
Cruz chuckled at her excitement, then his laughter faded when he realized he’d not only miss Sara, but Dani, too. The thought of not knowing what would become of this little girl who’d lost her father to gang violence bothered Cruz. He wanted to know that she’d be okay. That nothing bad would happen to her—ever.
It was sobering to realize that if he’d never gone to prison he’d never have met Sara, Dani or José. Until now, he’d believed prison had taken away what he’d wanted most—a rodeo career. But fate worked in mysterious ways and maybe there was a reason he’d gone along with Vic to confront the gangbanger that fateful night. Maybe prison had saved his life.
But it had also stolen his dreams.
Dreams can change.
Dani tugged on his jeans. “What’s the matter, Mr. Cruz? You look sad.”
He crouched in front of the child. “I’m not sad, Dani. What flavor of ice cream do you want?”
“Vanilla with sprinkles on top.”
“A confetti cone.” He walked over to the truck and opened the door for her. “Hop in.” At least Dani would take his mind off the inevitable for a short while. Because no matter how hard he wished it not to be true, he and Sara were parting in less than forty-eight hours.
“What’s your favorite ice cream?” Dani asked as Cruz drove out of town.
“I like vanilla, too.” The simple, sweet flavor reminded him of Sara—wholesome goodness.
“Are you gonna come to Albuquerque with us?” she asked.
“No.”
“Are you gonna stay at Papa’s?”
“I don’t think so.” The nearest Dairy Queen was twenty-three miles away. Dani had time to ask a hundred questions before they arrived.
“Why not?”
“I have more rodeos to ride in.”
“I like the horses, but rodeos stink.” She pinched her nose.
Cruz rubbed his hand over the ache throbbing in his chest. He’d never considered himself father material—never given a thought to being a father one day. But his protective feelings toward Dani had him contemplating the subject. Even though he was an ex-con, could he still be a good father? He’d grown up without a father figure during his teen years, and he wondered if he’d had a male role model in his life back then if he’d still have run with a tough crowd. T.C. Rivera had been one of the top bull riders in the country when he’d gone to prison. If he hadn’t gotten into the bar fight after the rodeo that night in South Dakota, he would have been around to teach Cruz to rodeo. Who knew—maybe Cruz would have won a national championship before his thirtieth birthday.
He glanced in the rearview mirror. Who would watch over Dani when she entered her teen years and boys showed interest in her? Would Sara be married by then, or single? Would José be alive to make sure the boys treated Dani with respect? When he thought back to his teen years and how he’d treated girls... He’d been a slave to his hormones and had never once considered that the girls he’d coaxed into having sex with him were somebody’s daughters. “Dani?”
“What?”
“Boys are yucky, right?”
“My friend Charity says boys have cooties.”
“Charity’s right. Don’t let a boy get close to you.”
“Tanner tries to pull my pigtails.”
“You tell Tanner if he doesn’t stop, I’ll make him.”
Dani’s eyes widened. “What are you gonna do?”
“I’ll hang him up by his socks on the monkey bars.”
Dani giggled. “Mr. Cruz?”
“Yeah?”
“I wish you could come to Albuquerque with us.”
“Me, too, Dani. Me, too.”
* * *
SARA CLOSED THE back door quietly and made her way to the barn. José had gone to bed over an hour ago, exhausted from packing and making decisions about what mementoes of Sofia’s he’d take with him. Sara had put Dani to bed shortly after José retired to his room, and she’d sat on the comforter and listened to her daughter’s adventure at the Dairy Queen and what Cruz had said he’d do if Tanner kept teasing Dani at school. Although she’d laughed, Sara couldn’t help but wish Cruz could be there for Dani for real when she had trouble at school. Sara worried that having only one parent would force Dani to grow up faster than a little girl her age should. She didn’t want Tony’s senseless murder to not only steal Dani’s father from her, but also her childhood.
Sara paused outside the barn doors and smoothed a hand over her hair. Tomorrow she’d put on a brave face and say goodbye to Cruz. But tonight she wanted to thank him in private for all his help.
You want more than that.
Ignoring the voice in her head, she entered the structure. “Are you finished?”
Cruz kept his back to her as he hoisted a hay bale onto his shoulder and walked it to the pile he’d built in the back corner. He deposited the bale on top of the others, then faced her. Neither spoke.
What was there to say? Everything she felt for Cruz was there in her eyes and she didn’t bother hiding it. She couldn’t bear the thought of saying goodbye to him for good. She wanted him to promise her that he’d keep in touch. That he’d visit her and Dani in Albuquerque. Call her once in a while so she could hear his voice and know that he was okay. But he wouldn’t. Their weeks together were a one-time thing and that was all it would ever be.
With her eyes she willed him to come closer. His lazy-hipped stride made her pulse race. He stopped in front of her and trailed his fingertips down her cheek and neck, stopping at her collarbone. She shivered.
“I’ll miss you, Sara Mendez.”
“I’ll miss you more.” She caressed his jaw.
“This is a bad idea.”
“I’ve run out of good ideas.” She lifted her mouth to his and held her breath, hoping he wouldn’t push her away. In the next breath his lips covered hers and she gave herself over to his gentle care. He made her yearn for more, then answered her silent pleas by deepening the kiss. This was their final goodbye and the desperation tugging at her soul refused to settle for slow and easy. She shoved her fingers through his hair, then pressed herself against him until he gathered her close—close enough for her to feel how much he wanted her.
If they found a way to be together, would the fire between them always burn this hot? Wondering was a waste of time. Her first priority was her family, but this night belonged to her. His hands found her breasts, his touch drawing a moan from deep inside her. She reached for his belt, her fingers fumbling with the buckle until his hand trapped hers against the leather.
“Wait,” he said.
“I don’t want to wait.”
Holding her face, he rested his forehead against hers. “I wish...”
“What?”
“Nothing.” He kissed her as he walked her backward into a stall filled with fresh hay.
Time passed in a blur. Hands and mouths touched and kissed while clothes were pushed out of the way
to make room for more touching and more kissing. When they stopped moving and only their harsh breath echoed around them, Sara battled tears. She didn’t want Cruz to see her cry. He’d feel guilty and that wasn’t fair since she’d come to him asking for this. She buried her face in the crook of his neck and hugged him hard, then shrugged into her clothes and left the barn. She headed straight for her room, where she threw herself across the bed and bawled like a baby.
Cruz stood in the darkened doorway of the barn, staring at the house. He touched the wetness on his neck. He’d never felt such a strong emotion for anyone in his life. Had he fallen in love with Sara? Did he even know what love was? If the hollow feeling that had attacked him after she fled the stall was any indication, then he’d definitely fallen in love with her.
* * *
“IS EVERYTHING LOADED?” Cruz asked Sara Saturday morning. He, Sara and José had risen at dawn to pack the remaining items in the trailer.
“I think so.” Sara glanced at José, who searched through his toolbox. “Which rodeo are you riding in this afternoon?”
“Red Rock.” He was heading west, and they were traveling north.
“I hope it goes well.”
He smiled. “I doubt it will.”
“One of these times the judges will have to give you a fair score.”
He figured he could rodeo the rest of his life and never earn a score in the eighties. He had no one to blame but himself and the choices he’d made in the past. What did it matter? Sara and Dani were moving on and he had to make decisions about his future. Rodeoing forever wasn’t in the cards.
“Did you get all your things from the trailer?” she asked.
He nodded.
“If rodeoing doesn’t work out, you’re welcome to use the trailer. José would be glad to have someone watching over the property.”
Living in Papago Springs without Sara would be torture. It was best to make a clean break from the town. “Thanks, but I won’t be coming back.”
He hated goodbyes—maybe because this was the first one he’d actually experienced. After the jury had handed him a guilty verdict, he hadn’t had the chance to say goodbye to anyone before they’d whisked him from the courtroom and returned him to jail.
“You sure you can handle the trailer?” The rental business had given Sara a larger trailer than she’d asked for because the smaller size she’d reserved hadn’t been delivered to the lot.
“We’ll take our time. It’s a straight shot up Highway 25.”
“Watch out for the wind.”
“We will.”
José joined them and held out his hand to Cruz. After they shook he said, “Thank you for helping me fix up the place.”
“Sure.”
José returned inside the house and Cruz said, “I better hit the road.”
“Let me wake Dani. She’ll be upset if she doesn’t get a chance to say goodbye.”
He held out his hands and backed up a step. “Let her sleep. We said goodbye last night.” The little pip-squeak had given him a hug and just about broken his heart when she’d asked him to come visit her in Albuquerque.
He glanced at the house and spotted José spying in the window. Even though Cruz yearned to kiss Sara goodbye, he held back.
“Keep this.” She handed him a business card. “It’s the number for the clinic I work at. If you ever visit Albuquerque, call me and we can meet for dinner.”
He shoved the card in his jeans pocket. “Will you do me a favor?” he asked.
“What’s that?”
“Smile when I drive away.”
Her eyes welled with tears and when one escaped he caught the tiny droplet with the pad of his thumb. “When I look in the rearview mirror, the last thing I want to see is your smile.”
“Okay.”
Cruz walked to his truck, then paused after he opened the door and looked at her. “I’ll never forget you, Sara Mendez.” He slid behind the wheel, then fumbled with the keys when his hand started shaking. He finally shoved the key into the ignition and fired up the motor. Making sure he didn’t look her way, he backed onto the road and shifted into Drive. When he finally got the courage to look in the mirror, Sara was smiling.
He ignored the burning sensation in his eyes and focused on the black ribbon of asphalt pulling his tires farther and farther away from Papago Springs and the one person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.
Chapter Eleven
Forty miles outside of Red Rock, New Mexico, Cruz pulled off the road and stared out the windshield. He couldn’t get the image of Sara towing the trailer out of his mind. His gut clenched when he pictured her having trouble controlling the SUV.
You can’t go to Albuquerque. You’ll violate your probation.
A sweat broke out across his brow. He’d waited twelve years to be released from that hellhole, and if he got caught in Albuquerque his taste of freedom would abruptly end. But having to live with the knowledge that something had happened to Sara, Dani and José because he hadn’t been there to help would be worse than another lifetime behind bars.
He shifted into Drive, checked his mirrors, then turned the truck around and headed to Papago Springs. Sara had an hour’s lead on him, but he figured she’d be driving below the speed limit and he’d easily catch them. He pressed the accelerator to the floor, then eased up when the speedometer hit eighty. Without a valid driver’s license he couldn’t afford to be pulled over by the highway patrol. When he drove into Papago Springs it was 10:30 a.m. Sara’s car and José’s truck were gone. He continued north, hoping to catch a glimpse of them within an hour.
Keeping his eyes peeled, he passed three horse trailers and one tractor but no sign of a white SUV or José’s battered pickup.
After another fifteen miles Cruz slowed down to navigate a sharp curve in the road that hugged an outcropping of rock. When the road straightened in front of him, he slammed on the brakes. Sara’s car sat in a ditch—the trailer twenty yards away, tipped on its side, José’s truck parked behind that.
Cruz’s heart plummeted to his stomach as he parked on the shoulder. Where were they? He shut off the engine and hopped out, then sprinted up to the SUV and looked through the windows. The seats were empty. Same for José’s vehicle. He shielded his eyes from the sun and glanced down the road—no sign of them walking for help. Had a stranger given them a ride to the nearest town?
Before Cruz had figured out his next move, a highway patrol car appeared in the distance. The squad car pulled in front of Sara’s SUV, then a moment later the officer, Sara, José and Dani exited the vehicle. The knot in his stomach unraveled and Cruz felt the tension seep from his body. Thank God they were all okay.
“Mr. Cruz! Mr. Cruz!” Dani rushed toward him. “I got to ride in a police car!”
It felt as natural as breathing when Cruz bent and scooped Dani into his arms. He propped her on his hip. “Looks like your mom had some trouble with the trailer.”
Dani nodded, then wiggled to get down and Cruz set her on the ground.
Sara smiled sheepishly. “I took the curve too fast and the trailer hitch broke loose.”
“I’m glad no one was hurt.” Cruz watched the officer check out the trailer.
“You’re supposed to be in Red Rock at a rodeo,” José said.
“Changed my mind and thought maybe you could use my help getting to Albuquerque.”
“You should have changed your mind before you left this morning.” José frowned.
“I’m here now.” Cruz walked up to the officer. “Any chance you’ve got a rope or tie-downs in your car?”
“Rope,” the officer said, leading the way to his vehicle.
Cruz waited for the officer to ask for his name, but today was his lucky day. The radio in the patrol car went off and the officer too
k the call. “I’ve got an emergency,” he said, opening the trunk. “I’ll swing by here in a couple of hours. Hopefully you’ll be gone.” He tossed the rope to Cruz.
“We’ll leave the rope on the side of the road,” Cruz said.
“Take it. You might need it again.”
Sara thanked the officer for his help before he drove off, then asked Cruz, “Where’s he going?”
“Another emergency. I need you to move your car, so I can back my truck up to the trailer. I’ve got a hitch on it.”
“What’s the rope for?” she asked.
“If I can’t pull the trailer out on my own, then I’ll attach the rope to José’s truck and have him pull, too.”
“Cruz.”
“What?”
“I’m glad you came back.”
Her smile squeezed his chest. “Me, too.” When he got to his truck, he spoke to José. “Will you keep Dani out of the way?”
José took his granddaughter’s hand and walked several yards down the road. The old man acted grumpy but Cruz sensed he was relieved to have help in this situation even if he wasn’t sure what Cruz’s sudden appearance meant for his daughter-in-law. He’d bet José would be more than happy to toss him ten bucks for pulling the trailer out of the ditch, then send him on his way.
Rescuing the trailer was a slow process, but he’d never been more grateful now that Shorty had gifted him his truck. The diesel engine had the power to pull the loaded trailer upright and back onto the road.
“Thanks, Cruz.” Sara stopped by his side. “Between you and me, that was a little scary. I’m just glad the SUV didn’t roll over.”
“I’m keeping the trailer hitched to my truck.”
“You’re coming with us to Albuquerque?” The bright light in Sara’s eyes nearly blinded him.
“I’ll make sure you get there safe and sound and help you unload.”
She flung her arms around his neck and hugged him. “Thank you.”
He couldn’t help himself—knew he shouldn’t with José watching—but he buried his face against her neck. Lord, he was going to miss her. He walked off, needing to put a little distance between them. Fifteen minutes later, the group was ready to get back on the road. Cruz made Sara lead, then José followed and he brought up the rear. If the trailer was going to come loose again he didn’t want Sara or José running into it.
