‘We are so,’ Clementine shouted at him. She could feel the red rising on her neck.
‘Why don’t we split up?’ Astrid suggested. ‘I can take anyone who wants to go back, and Poppy can take anyone who wants to search.’
It sounded reasonable enough to Clementine. She was keen to find Aunt Violet. She didn’t think her mummy would be very happy if she lost her, although Uncle Digby probably wouldn’t mind.
‘Who wants to go with Poppy?’ Astrid asked.
Clementine, Sophie, Angus and Joshua put up their hands.
‘Who wants to go back?’
A small sea of hands shot into the air.
‘I’m starving,’ Eddie Whipple groaned.
‘Yeah, me too,’ said Lester.
‘I’ll tell your dad where you are, Poppy,’ said Astrid. ‘Come on then.’ She beckoned to the children and began to lead the group back across the field. The sheep and their lambs had all relocated to a quiet spot much further down the paddock.
‘Thanks,’ Poppy called after her. She turned to the four intrepid adventurers who had stayed behind. ‘Now, you have to listen to me because I know everywhere on the farm and I don’t want anyone else to get lost.’
‘Boring,’ Joshua said.
‘You can go back with the others if you’re going to say that,’ Poppy snapped.
‘You can’t make me,’ Joshua said.
‘But I will,’ Angus growled. He was growing impatient and wanted to find his missing grandmother.
Joshua rolled his eyes.
‘We have to stay together,’ Poppy said. ‘Come on, let’s go.’
Astrid led the rest of the children back to the farmhouse, where the smell of barbecued sausages filled the air.
Lily Bauer looked up from where she was cutting bread rolls in half to see the children trooping into the back garden.
‘Hello there. What have you done with Mrs Bottomley?’ Lily asked.
‘She’s gone,’ Eddie Whipple said.
Lily frowned. ‘What do you mean?’
Astrid spoke up. ‘Mrs Bottomley and Clementine’s great-aunt disappeared.’
‘Disappeared?’ said Sophie Rousseau’s mother anxiously. She was looking around the group of children and noticed that her own daughter and her friends were missing too.
‘Well, we went to see the lambs and then Mrs Bottomley got chased by a goose. It was very angry. Then Clementine’s great-aunt chased the goose and they all disappeared,’ Astrid explained.
Lily Bauer looked at Odette Rousseau in alarm. ‘And where’s Poppy?’
‘And Sophie?’ Mrs Rousseau added.
‘Poppy said that she knows everywhere on the farm so she’s gone to look for them with Sophie and Clementine, and Joshua and Angus too,’ said Astrid.
Lily didn’t like the sound of this at all. It was bad enough that no one had located Granny Bert yet, but now Mrs Bottomley and Aunt Violet were missing too, and the children had formed a search party. She knew that Poppy was reliable but Angus and Joshua out there could spell trouble.
‘Heinrich, I think you should go and find the children,’ Lily suggested as her husband lifted the last of the sausages from the barbecue plate. ‘We can get lunch organised for this lot.’
Her husband nodded.
Mr Tribble offered to go too, seeing as Joshua was with them.
Meanwhile, out in the field, Poppy decided that they should head towards the edge of the woods, which was the direction they had last seen Mrs Bottomley and Aunt Violet running.
‘They can’t be too far,’ she said as the five children trooped along.
They came to a stone wall. It wasn’t especially high but would have presented a challenge for most five-year-olds.
‘How are we supposed to get over that?’ Sophie asked.
‘Me and Angus can do it,’ Joshua bragged. ‘Because we’re commandos.’
‘No you’re not,’ Sophie said. ‘You’re little boys.’
‘It’s okay.’ Poppy pointed further along. ‘There’s a stile.’
‘I’m going first.’ Joshua raced ahead to where the little ladder straddled the wall. He rushed up and then jumped off the other side.
‘Pooh!’ he yelled.
‘What’s the matter now?’ Poppy asked. She clambered up the ladder and stood on the top rung. Joshua had landed smack bang in the middle of a cow pat.
Sophie scurried up the ladder next. She held her nose and said, ‘That’s disgusting.’ The two girls giggled.
‘You’re disgusting.’ Joshua hissed and pulled a face.
Angus and Clementine joined the others on the far side of the wall and the five children carried on walking.
‘Do you really think they could have come this far?’ Clementine asked. She noticed that beyond the field there was thick woodland.
‘We can go back if you like,’ Poppy said. She was surprised that Aunt Violet and Mrs Bottomley hadn’t reappeared.
Clementine shook her head. ‘I don’t want Aunt Violet to be lost.’ She never thought she’d say it, but it was true.
The goose called Eloise had chased Mrs Bottomley over a wall and deep into the woods. Aunt Violet followed, waving her arms about and yelling at the white bird.
Mrs Bottomley stumbled and fell backwards and the goose seized her opportunity. She leapt onto the woman’s chest. Aunt Violet couldn’t believe what she was seeing.
Mrs Bottomley flapped her arms at the creature and screamed.
‘Good heavens, get off her.’ Aunt Violet pushed against the goose’s sizable rump. Eloise turned and snapped at Aunt Violet, who retreated. The creature turned her attention back to Mrs Bottomley.
Eloise thrust her beak forward and grabbed hold of the shiny silver whistle around the teacher’s neck. She pulled at the cord.
‘It’s strangling me,’ Mrs Bottomley wailed.
‘Give it to her,’ said Aunt Violet.
‘What?’
‘The whistle, woman. She’s after the whistle.’ Aunt Violet knelt beside Mrs Bottomley’s head and pulled the cord from around her neck. She then played tug-of-war with the goose, who still had the whistle firmly in her beak.
‘Why, you beastly creature!’ Aunt Violet pulled one way and the goose pulled the other. ‘Have your way then!’
As soon as Aunt Violet let go of the whistle, the creature turned and waddled off at lightning pace into the woods.
Ethel Bottomley sat up. She exhaled loudly but didn’t seem to be able to find any words.
Aunt Violet was similarly dumbstruck.
The two sat in silence for several minutes.
‘Well, that was unexpected,’ Aunt Violet said, looking distastefully at the brown marks on her white suit.
‘I . . . I think you saved my life, Miss Appleby,’ Mrs Bottomley stammered.
‘Well, I wouldn’t go that far,’ Aunt Violet replied. ‘But you were in a bit of trouble there.’
A tear fell onto Mrs Bottomley’s cheek.
‘Are you all right?’ Aunt Violet offered her hand and pulled the woman to her feet.
‘I think it’s just all a bit of a shock.’ Mrs Bottomley began to cry.
‘Come now, Mrs Bottomley,’ Aunt Violet soothed.
Without warning, Ethel Bottomley launched herself at Aunt Violet and hugged her tightly. ‘Thank you, Miss Appleby. Thank you,’ she sobbed.
Violet Appleby stood rigid for a few moments, wondering what she should do. Then she did the only thing possible and hugged Ethel Bottomley right back.
Seconds later, the women separated and Mrs Bottomley sniffed loudly. ‘Where are we?’ she asked.
‘I don’t know.’ Aunt Violet looked around under the gloomy canopy of trees. Up ahead she spied a stone wall and a stile leading to an open field. ‘I think perhaps we should go that way.�
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Mrs Bottomley hobbled along beside her and together they somehow managed to get up and over the stile and into the meadow.
Aunt Violet peered into the afternoon sun. ‘I think there’s a stream down there. Perhaps it’s the one we crossed earlier.’
‘I don’t know if I can walk much further,’ Mrs Bottomley whimpered. Her bunions were aching and she had two enormous blisters on her heels.
The ladies ambled on until they reached an enormous fir tree amid a grove of trees. The dappled light danced around its branches, which scooped towards the ground.
Something caught Aunt Violet’s eye. She peered through the foliage. ‘Goodness me!’ She lifted the branch and disappeared through the other side.
‘Please don’t leave me behind,’ Mrs Bottomley wailed.
‘I’m coming back for you.’ Aunt Violet held the branch up and Mrs Bottomley followed her.
‘What is this place?’ Mrs Bottomley said as she looked about. There was an old kitchen cabinet with a sink, a pine dresser full of china and even a chandelier hanging from one of the branches overhead.
Two green armchairs faced away from them, towards a mock fireplace, and there was a round pine table and four chairs set up as if someone was expected for afternoon tea.
‘What do you think it is?’ Mrs Bottomley whispered. ‘You don’t think anyone lives here, do you?’
Aunt Violet smiled and shook her head. ‘Of course not. It’s a cubbyhouse.’
A silver head peered around the side of one of the armchairs. ‘Oh, hello there, dears. I’ve been expecting you.’
Aunt Violet and Mrs Bottomley spun around.
‘Who are you?’ they asked in unison.
Heinrich Bauer and Mr Tribble set off on foot to locate the children and lost ladies. Mr Greening had telephoned a few minutes before they left to say that there was no sign of Granny Bert in the village either.
‘This is not quite the day I had planned,’ Heinrich frowned.
‘No, but at least it will be one the children will remember,’ Mr Tribble replied cheerily. ‘Surely they can’t be too far. Besides, there’s nothing especially dangerous out here, is there?’
Heinrich began to shake his head then stopped. He thought for a moment. ‘Well, apart from the geese, perhaps there is something else.’
‘What is it?’ Mr Tribble asked.
‘I forgot about Ramon,’ Heinrich replied.
‘Who’s Ramon?’
Heinrich gulped. ‘He’s our ram and I’m afraid he’s not very fond of children.’
‘He’s only a sheep. Surely he couldn’t do that much damage,’ Mr Tribble replied. ‘Where is he?’
‘He’s in the far meadow just this side of the woods. I moved him yesterday, so Poppy would have no idea that he’s there. And you’re wrong about Ramon. I’ve seen him flatten three grown men, myself included. Come on, Mr Tribble, we need to get to him before anyone else does.’
The two men jogged into the long meadow and across the stone bridge over the stream. They looked up and down the length of the field and raced towards the far meadow and the woods beyond.
Poppy, Clementine, Sophie and the two boys walked in single file across the far meadow towards the fence.
‘What’s that?’ Joshua looked around just in time to see a huge woolly beast charging towards them.
The other children stopped and looked too.
‘Oh my goodness,’ Poppy yelled. ‘It’s Ramon. RUN!’
The children took off as fast as they could. But Ramon was speedy for a sheep. He put his head down and raced towards them, bleating loudly.
Poppy and Sophie reached the stone wall and scrambled up using the rocks as footholds. Clementine tripped on a stone in the grass and was sent sprawling.
Angus and Joshua were behind her. Joshua kept running but Angus stopped to see if she was all right.
‘Come on,’ the boy said and grabbed Clemmie’s arm.
‘My knee hurts,’ she whimpered.
Ramon was getting closer and closer.
‘Run, Clemmie, run!’ Poppy called. Joshua reached the wall and was trying to climb, but his foot kept slipping back.
‘Help! He’s gonna eat me,’ the boy wailed.
Clementine and Angus reached the wall too. Angus scrambled up first and then hauled Clemmie up behind him.
Ramon was flying towards Joshua when all of a sudden the beast pulled up just short of the boy. The ram sniffed. He pawed at the ground and bleated loudly.
‘What’s he doing?’ Angus asked, wondering if he was about to toss Joshua over the wall.
‘Joshua, have you got any food in your pockets?’ Poppy asked.
Joshua shook his head. Then he remembered he’d stolen an extra brownie at morning tea time. ‘Maybe,’ he said. He reached into his pocket. ‘I’ve got this.’ The brownie was a lot flatter than when he’d shoved it in there.
‘Give it to him,’ Poppy yelled. ‘Hold your hand out flat and give it to him.’
‘To the sheep?’ Joshua asked, frowning.
‘Yes, to Ramon. He loves chocolate. As soon as he takes it, climb onto the wall,’ the girl replied.
Joshua wondered what sort of sheep ate chocolate. He held out the squished cake and waited. Ramon sniffed his hand then licked his palm.
‘That tickles,’ the boy giggled.
Ramon began to nibble at the brownie. Then he chewed it for a minute or so before gulping it down. Joshua had just enough time to clamber onto the top of the stone wall.
‘Dumb sheep,’ Joshua said. ‘He’s not scary.’
Ramon then charged forward and headbutted the wall with such force that the stones on top shook. Joshua wobbled and just managed to stay upright.
‘Yes, he is.’ The boy raced along the wall to the stile, where his friends were waiting. ‘He could have killed me.’
‘Yeah, but he didn’t,’ Angus replied. He turned to Clementine. ‘Your knee’s bleeding. Here, have this.’ Angus pulled a clean white handkerchief from his pocket and handed it to Clemmie, who mopped up the blood.
‘Thank you, Angus,’ she said. ‘You saved me from that crazy sheep.’
Angus smiled. ‘It was nothing.’
‘Come on.’ Joshua jumped down from the wall. ‘Let’s go and find those stupid old ladies.’
Angus glared at the boy. Poppy did too.
Poppy led the children along the edge of the woods.
‘Mrs Bottomley!’ Sophie called.
‘Aunt Violet, where are you?’ Clementine called too.
The children were making as much noise as they possibly could, but there was still no reply.
‘I wonder why Mrs Bottomley doesn’t just blow her whistle,’ Clementine said. ‘Then we could find them.’
‘I’m hungry,’ Joshua grumbled. ‘I want my brownie back.’
‘You shouldn’t have had it in the first place,’ Sophie said. ‘But it’s lucky you did, or you’d probably have a very sore bottom right now.’
The other children giggled.
‘Let’s go home and see if they’ve turned up there,’ said Poppy. ‘I know a shortcut.’
‘It better not be anywhere near that sheep again,’ warned Joshua.
Poppy shook her head. ‘It’s not.’
The children all agreed. They had no idea what time it was but it was quite likely the adults would be getting worried about them by now.
They climbed up and over another stile and sped across an open field. Poppy assured everyone that Ramon couldn’t get near them, but they decided to go as quickly as they could just to be on the safe side.
The children crossed into the far end of the long meadow.
‘Shh, what’s that noise?’ Clementine said.
‘I can’t hear anything except the lambs and some ducks,’ Sophie re
plied.
Clemmie listened more closely. ‘No, there’s something else.’
The children entered a grove of trees. The sound of muffled laughter was unmistakable.
‘It’s coming from over there,’ called Clemmie. She ran towards the giant fir tree.
‘That’s our cubby,’ said Poppy, and chased after her. She pulled back the branch that shielded the entry and the children followed her inside. They couldn’t believe their eyes.
‘Nan?’ Angus exclaimed.
‘Aunt Violet, what are you doing here?’ Clementine asked.
Poppy’s jaw dropped. ‘Granny Bert!’
The three elderly women were sitting around the pine kitchen table, laughing like hyenas.
The children noticed the old chipped teacups and saucers on the table. They were completely dry.
Aunt Violet turned and smiled at the group. ‘Oh, thank heavens.’
‘We’re saved!’ said Mrs Bottomley, clasping her hands together.
Granny Bert frowned. ‘You didn’t tell me you’d invited more guests.’
‘Granny, it’s me, Poppy.’ The girl walked over and stood in front of the woman.
‘Poppy, of course I know it’s you. Do you think I’m losing my marbles?’ Granny Bert said with a broad grin.
The children didn’t know what to think.
‘What are you doing here?’ Angus asked.
‘We found this place by accident and Mrs Rumble was here already, so we thought we’d just sit and have a rest before we tried to find our way back to the house. I’m afraid your grandmother has some terrible blisters,’ Aunt Violet explained.
‘But what were you laughing about?’ Clementine asked.
‘What were we laughing about?’ Aunt Violet looked at the other ladies, who shrugged.
‘Do we need to have a reason to laugh?’ Mrs Bottomley asked. ‘I think young people these days take life far too seriously.’
Aunt Violet began to giggle. Granny Bert did too. Mrs Bottomley roared with laughter.
The children didn’t understand any of it.
‘Are you going to be friends now?’ Clementine asked her great-aunt when the laughter finally died down.
Clementine Rose and the Farm Fiasco 4 Page 6
