Jesse chuckled. “You’ll get more pieces of bread when you finish the one in your hand.”
Elliot glanced his way, his eyebrows furrowed, not at all happy that he had to eat the biscuit one piece at a time.
Laura shot Jesse an apologetic smile. “I should have remembered I can’t give him everything at once.”
Jesse shrugged. “There’s no harm in it. He’ll figure it out soon enough.”
Glad he wasn’t going to criticize her, she relaxed. So much seemed to be hinging on whether or not Jesse thought she did an adequate job of taking care of his son. There was no doubt this marriage had been a risk, even if it was borne of necessity.
“I’ll do better next time,” Laura promised.
“Don’t worry about it,” Jesse assured her as he poked a potato with his fork. “I’ve made the same mistake.”
“You have?” She couldn’t be sure if he was telling her the truth or not. For all she knew, he only said it to make her feel better.
He smiled at her. “Yes, I have. You make a lot less mistakes than I do.”
“What kind of mistakes?”
“I don’t know if I should tell you. Some of them have been embarrassing. I’m just glad Fanny didn’t see them.”
Curious, she leaned toward him. “Like what?” When he seemed reluctant to tell her, she added, “If you want me to feel better about almost letting him shove an entire biscuit into his mouth, it’d help if I knew what embarrassing things you’ve done.”
“Well…” He paused then said, “Alright. But I’m only giving one example. I don’t want you to think you married a dunce. One time when I was in the barn taking care of the chores, I sat him on the stool I use to milk cows. I thought he’d stay seated. Long story short, when I looked over at the stool, he was gone. It turned out, he was playing in an empty stall, and I hadn’t taken the time to clean it out earlier that day. Let’s just say I had to give him a bath because he was covered in horse droppings.”
She gasped. “He wasn’t!”
“Thankfully, it washed off easily.”
Despite how horrible such a task had to be, she burst out laughing. “What a mess that must have been.”
With a chuckle, he nodded. “It was. It’s bad enough cleaning him up when the diaper doesn’t catch everything.”
“We need to keep a close eye on Elliot. Who knows what other trouble he could get into?”
“I think he’ll get into all kinds of trouble if we let him. He isn’t content to stay where he’s supposed to be.”
“I wonder if all babies are like that.” Laura glanced over at Elliot and gave him another piece of biscuit. “I didn’t have any younger brothers or sisters, so I really don’t know what to expect.”
“I don’t, either. I have a younger sister and brother, but they’re a couple years younger than me. I wasn’t old enough to remember them as babies.”
“It looks like we’ll have to learn what to do together.”
“Yeah, it does.”
His voice turned soft, so she chanced a look in his direction. In the sunlight streaming into the room, she caught sight of the small smile on his face and wondered if that smile might be for her.
No. It wasn’t. He was only smiling because they’d been having a fun conversation. Besides, they’d been laughing anyway. It was just her own attraction to him that was making her see things that weren’t there. At the moment, she wished she hadn’t noticed him—really noticed him—that morning.
She’d thought attraction was instant, that either a woman was attracted to a man as soon as she met him or she wasn’t. That was why she believed a platonic arrangement could work. She’d never harbored any romantic feelings for him before. He’d just been there. Yes, he’d been kind. Yes, he’d been a good friend. But he’d never been more than that.
Then suddenly, without warning, all of that had changed when she saw him that morning. If she hadn’t experienced how quickly such a shift could happen, she wouldn’t have believed it. And all it did was make things awkward when they shouldn’t have been.
Before he noticed she was staring at him, she turned back to her plate and finished her meal. When supper was over, she cleaned the table and Elliot, deciding she’d do the dishes after she put Elliot to bed for the night.
Since Jesse went outside, that left her time to tidy up inside the house while watching Elliot and occasionally pulling him away from things he shouldn’t be getting into. She’d have to find ways to make the home safer for him. She wouldn’t be able to watch him all the time.
Soon enough, it was time to put Elliot to bed, and her gaze went to her bed, which Jesse had set up along the wall, as far from the crib as possible. He’d done that shortly after Amanda and Richard had left while Laura was outside with Elliot so he could play in the yard.
Now, as she tucked Elliot into his crib, she thought it’d be the perfect time to hide the booklet. She didn’t have any intention of reading it, but she didn’t want Jesse to find it. Throwing it into the burn pile wouldn’t do. He might see it among the other trash. She supposed she could throw it in a trash bin in town at some point. That would probably be the safest way to dispose of it.
But for the time being, she needed to hide it, and there was only one place she could think of that would work. She pulled the booklet out of her pocket, lifted her mattress, and tucked it under there. Once she was sure the booklet was safely hidden, she smoothed out the blanket and released her breath.
Good. With that out of the way, she could relax. Going over to Elliot, she saw his eyes were closed. The poor boy had had a long day. Laura, in her excitement, hadn’t let him take much of a nap. Well, maybe tomorrow, she’d do better. With a smile, she tucked his hair behind his ear, whispered a good-night to him, and left the room so she could do the dishes.
This routine, she was sure, would soon become a habit as she slipped into her new life as wife and mother. Well, mostly mother. But even so, she couldn’t imagine a more rewarding job.
Chapter Twelve
A week later, Laura bit her lower lip as she stood in front of her parents’ house. Elliot squirmed in Laura’s arms, though he didn’t insist she let him down. He must have sensed her unease and decided to be patient for her sake.
Next to her, Amanda offered a sympathetic smile. “Are you sure you want to do this?”
No. No, she wasn’t. This was probably a mistake. Things had ended on such a horrible note the last time she’d seen her mother. She’d only seen her father since then, and she’d told her father that lie about possibly being with child. She was sure that lie wouldn’t make this confrontation with her mother any easier.
“I need to get this over with,” Laura finally decided. “She’s my mother. I can’t avoid her forever.”
With a nod, Amanda knocked on the door.
“Thanks for being here,” Laura said.
“It’s the least I can do after all the times you’ve been there for me,” Amanda replied.
Laura tried to smile, but she didn’t have the strength to do it. Instead, she turned her gaze forward and pressed her hand on Elliot’s back, reminding herself that no matter what came from this conversation, it’d be worth it because she’d still have him.
The doorknob turned. She straightened her back. This was it. The moment of truth.
The door creaked open, but instead of the scowl and reprimand Laura expected, her mother let out a sob and hurried to embrace her.
Shocked, Laura couldn’t respond. She thought for sure her mother would be angry with her. She looked over at Amanda, whose eyes were wide with surprise.
“Come in,” Laura’s mother said, urging her inside. “Your father’s not here. It’s safe to talk.”
Laura stepped into the entryway but waited until Amanda was with her before she led her friend to the parlor. Still unsure of how things had changed so drastically with her mother, she sat on the couch and let Elliot down. Elliot seemed more than happy to start exploring a new environment. Lau
ra hadn’t brought him here before, figuring it was best not to upset her parents since they hadn’t been pleased she’d decided to take care of him to begin with.
“I’ll get some coffee and cookies,” Laura’s mother said as Amanda sat next to her.
While Laura’s mother hurried to the kitchen, Laura turned her gaze to Amanda. “I don’t know who that woman is,” Laura whispered.
Amanda chuckled and gave her a hug. “Don’t question it. Just be glad this isn’t what you were expecting.”
Amanda was right. She really ought to count her blessings on this one.
Her mother returned with a tray of refreshments and set them down. “Help yourself.”
Laura took a cup and noted that her hand was trembling. Though things were going much better than she’d thought possible, she was still nervous.
As Amanda put sugar into her cup of coffee, Elliot pulled himself up the table so he could stand. He then made an attempt to grab a cookie but lost his balance and fell on his behind. The rug beneath him cushioned his fall, and he laughed.
The others, in turned, laughed with him.
“I forgot how curious babies are,” Laura’s mother said. “It seems like only yesterday you were his age,” she told Laura, “but I can’t remember the details about that time.”
“Elliot’s a sweet boy,” Laura replied, reaching down and giving his head a playful pat. She sat back up, lest she spill her drink, and turned her attention to her mother. “I hope you can understand why I wanted to be his mother. He’s an adorable child.”
“Yes, he is,” her mother agreed then took a sip of her coffee. “Is he old enough to have a cookie?”
“Yes, as long as it’s soft enough for him to swallow.” She still needed to work up her courage to do more than hold a cup of coffee. Yes, her mother had shocked her in a very good way, but she was still nervous about what this meant going forward. She set the cup down. “I’m sorry I stormed out of here the way I did,” she said. “I should have handled it better, but I didn’t know how.”
“I’m sorry I pushed you so hard to do what I wanted instead of letting you make your own decision.” Her mother glanced at her cup and sighed. “It’s not easy being a woman. So many times we’re told what to do and how to do it. I was afraid you’d make the wrong choice and end up regretting it.” She paused then asked, “Laura, whatever you say, I won’t tell your father. But I need to know the truth. Did you marry Jesse because you thought you might be with child?”
Laura was sure Amanda was shocked by this question even more than Laura had been shocked by her mother’s reaction to seeing her today. Laura hadn’t told Amanda about the fib she’d told her father. She honestly hadn’t thought the topic would come up in this conversation. She should have known better, but she’d been preoccupied with how she was going to respond to her mother’s accusations that she’d thought of little else.
Clearing her throat, Laura said, “The truth is, Jesse and I were never together in that way.” She picked up a cookie and broke it then gave a piece to Elliot, hoping the pause would help embolden her to continue. “I only told Father that because he was so adamant about taking me home after I got married. I figured the only way to stop him was to tell him I might be expecting.”
“Yes, I can understand your reason for lying. I know your father’s been hard to deal with during this time.”
“Has he been difficult here, too?”
“He’s angry. He had this idea he was going to arrange a marriage for you, and he started selecting potential suitors when we came to Omaha.”
“Yes, I know.”
“He doesn’t mean to be cruel, Laura. Our marriage was arranged between our parents when we came of marrying age. It was the way things were done in our families for generations. Women were given no say in these matches. They just did what was expected. This new world is a scary one for the parents. Most women are picking their own husbands, and marriage is a lifetime commitment. It shouldn’t be taken lightly. Great thought needs to come into the decision.”
“Jesse’s a good man, Mother. He treats those he loves very well. Some men would have refused to raise a child if their wives had died in childbirth, but Jesse didn’t do that. He not only chose to raise Elliot, but he loves him, too. That’s why I knew Jesse would make a good husband. A man who loves his child the way Jesse loves Elliot is worth marrying.”
“Yes, I remember how hard it was for him when Elsie died. He suffered a great deal.”
Something in her mother’s eyes indicated that she’d often wished her own husband would love her in the same way. Laura took a good moment to study her mother. Up to now, it hadn’t occurred to her what her mother thought of her own marriage. She’d just assumed her parents were happy together because they’d never voiced a complaint. But now she realized things weren’t what they seemed.
“You’re an adult now,” her mother continued, offering a smile. “I have to remember that you’re not a child anymore. The time passed so fast.”
Laura glanced at Elliot, who was still so young. She wished he would stay young forever. No doubt, her mother had once looked at her and felt the same way. Someday, probably all too soon, Elliot would sit in the parlor with her and tell her about the young woman he wanted to marry.
The time still seemed a long way off at this moment, but the day would come soon enough. And then what? Besides grandchildren, what did she have to look forward to? What was her life going to look like then?
***
“How did things go with your mother?” Jesse asked that evening during supper.
Laura glanced up from the chicken she was eating and smiled. “Good. Better than I’d hoped, actually.”
“It did?”
“Yes. Um, she welcomed me with open arms. We had a good talk.” She turned to give Elliot some mashed potatoes. “She was impressed with Elliot. He’s a smart boy for someone his age.”
“I think it’s because of you he’s doing as well as he is.”
Surprised by the unexpected compliment, she glanced his away again. “You do?”
“You stepped in and were a mother to him when he really needed it. He knows you love him. He’s happier when you’re here.”
She turned back to Elliot and smiled. “I’m happier when I’m here, too. He’s going to accomplish so many wonderful things.” She brushed a lock of Elliot’s hair from his forehead. “It’s hard to believe he’ll grow up, though, doesn’t it?”
“It is. I know it’s selfish, but sometimes I wish he could be this age forever.”
“I don’t think it’s selfish. I think it just comes with enjoying this time in his life. It’s hard to want it to end.”
She tore off a very small piece of the chicken and gave it to Elliot. The boy didn’t seem to know what to think of it at first. His face scrunched up, as if carefully weighing the pros and cons of the meat. Finally, he swallowed it, said, “More,” and opened his mouth.
With a chuckle, she hurried to do as he wished.
“He’s been eating better ever since you’ve been making all the meals,” Jesse told her. Then, as an afterthought, he added, “I’ve been eating better, too. It’s been nice having something decent to eat for a change.”
“I made you two lunches when I came out here,” she reminded him.
“I know, and believe me, I appreciated it. But it’s nice knowing every meal is like this one.”
Their eyes met for several seconds, and Laura caught the sudden heat rising in her cheeks. She swallowed, hoping he didn’t notice the rush of pleasure his smile had elicited, and turned back to Elliot.
After a moment, Jesse asked, “Have you seen your father since the day we married?”
She shook her head. “No. I might have been able to see him today if I wanted, but I chose to go when I knew he’d be at work. I’m not sure I’m ready to see him yet.”
“No one can blame you for that.”
“One thing I have noticed,” she began as she fed Elliot m
ore mashed potatoes, “is that Fanny hasn’t been over here. I thought she’d want to see Elliot.”
“Her body’s been aching,” Jesse replied after he took a drink of coffee. “When it gets like that, she stays inside all day. I know it’s mean to say, but I like it when she’s not feeling well because she leaves me and Elliot alone.” He paused. “It’s hard to do as the Good Book says. I know I’m supposed to honor her because she’s Elsie’s mother, but every time I talk to her, we end up arguing.”
“I think there’s something in Fanny that brings out the worst in people.”
“So you feel it, too?”
Laura nodded. “A couple days ago, I went over to bring her soup, and she said it wasn’t edible. She took one spoonful of soup and spit it out. Then she dumped the rest of the soup on the lawn and gave me the bowl. I haven’t been over there since.”
“Why didn’t you tell me about this when it happened?”
Surprised at the concern in his voice, she said, “You’ve been busy managing this place. I didn’t want to bother you. Besides,” she shrugged, “it was between me and her. I’ve been staying to myself ever since.”
“That wasn’t right of her to do it. Even if your soup did taste awful, which it doesn’t, there’s no reason for her to be that way.”
“Considering how she’s been with you, I wasn’t surprised. I just need to figure out the best way to respond to her.”
“Your response wasn’t the problem. It’s her actions that need fixing.”
Noting how upset he was, she didn’t know what to say. After a moment, she turned her attention to Elliot and fed him the rest of the meal.
***
Jesse pounded on Fanny’s door then crossed his arms. As much as he wanted to take care of the chores, he couldn’t until he got this matter resolved first. When she didn’t open the door, he banged on it again.
“Fanny, I know you’re in there, so you might as well open up,” he yelled.
Finally, after what seemed like forever, the door opened, and Fanny scowled. “I was resting. My muscles are bothering me again. An old woman needs plenty of rest, you know. I can’t go all day from one chore to another like you can.”
The Marriage Agreement Page 10
