by Jerramy Fine
—MARY POPPINS
Oftentimes a UK university or UK employer will set up a British bank account for you. But in some cases you’ll have to do it yourself. As part of the UK’s money laundering legislation, British banks must establish your identity when you open an account. It can’t hurt to bring a reference from your US bank, but by law the British bank will need to see one identification document (like a passport) and one address verification document (something formally addressed to you at your UK address).
This is a bit of a catch-22 as it’s quite hard to establish a UK address unless you have money to pay the rent. That said, until you set up your UK bank account, make sure your US bank account offers the following:
no ATM fees when you withdraw cash abroad
a credit or debit card without fees for overseas purchases
online banking
a twenty-four-hour helpline
the ability to quickly transfer money internationally (For this you will need to know routing numbers, SWIFT codes, and BIC numbers.)
As you’d expect, British banks offer a staggering array of accounts to choose from. As part of preparing for your move to London, go to MoneySupermarket to compare what’s on offer in terms of interest rates, etc (www.moneysupermarket.com/current-accounts).
KNOW THE BANKING LINGO:
current account: a checking account.
standing order: These are regular bank transfers to a company or person. You may need to organize one of these for your rent. Ask your landlord for a standing order form, fill it in, and give the completed form to your bank.
direct debit: This is similar to a standing order, but instead of returning the completed form to the bank, you return the form to a company that you authorize to take money from your account. Most Brits use direct debits to pay for regular household bills.
chip and pin: In the UK (and across Europe), they don’t rely on signatures to authorize card payments. Instead, your debit and credit cards are fitted with a microchip and private pin number—which is much more secure. (The downside is that you have one more thing to memorize.)
cheques (that’s the UK spelling of “checks”): These aren’t used in the UK as much as they are in the US. Debit cards that take money directly from your checking account are preferred, and most bills are paid online via bank transfers or direct debits (although you can still send a cheque, if you prefer).
overdraft: Imagine my surprise when I learned that bouncing cheques in the UK is entirely allowed! Don’t get excited—they do charge you for the privilege and you need to have something called an “agreed overdraft.” An overdraft allows you to take money out of your checking account even when the balance is zero. You can only take up to an agreed limit (usually £500) and interest is payable on the amount you take. (If you are a student, you may be offered an interest-free overdraft.) Still, this handy facility definitely helps you get by from pay cheque to pay cheque and is a lot cheaper than borrowing money on a credit card.
TAXES:
Most UK employers automatically deduct all UK tax from your salary; this is called “Pay As You Earn” (or PAYE) and is great because it means no paperwork and no saving for a big tax bill at the end of the year.
You only need to file a separate UK tax return if you are self-employed.
The good news is that the UK tax return is a bazillion times easier to fill out than the US version, so hiring an expensive London accountant is usually not necessary.
Don’t forget that US citizens are still obligated to file a US tax return once a year during the time they are overseas (which means you might have to file two tax returns per year).
In most cases you’ll pay so much tax in the UK that you are not required to pay any tax in the US (but you still have to fill out the form explaining this to the US government).
Staying Focused
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
—OSCAR WILDE
Growing up in the heartland of America, everyone around me scoffed at my big London dreams. But I ignored them. I truly believed that if I continued to define the life that I wanted, continued to focus on it with all of my intention—and was ready to claim it with all of my heart—eventually the universe would provide it for me.
Even back then, I somehow sensed that I needed to visualize my intentions if I wanted them to materialize. So I plastered my bedroom walls with dozens of glossy posters: black-and-white photographs of London’s famous landmarks; pictures of London’s sparkling night skylines; beautiful prints of Buckingham Palace, Kensington Palace, Hampton Court Palace, and the Crown Jewels.
Late at night, when I became infuriated with my high school chemistry equations, my tired eyes would always wander away from my desk and settle onto my wonderful English posters. Sometimes it seemed that if I stared at those posters hard enough, I could somehow transport myself into them.
And in a way, I have done just that! Gone are the days of small town America! (I now live in London!) Gone are the days of life on a shoestring! (I now get paid to write about England!) Gone are the days of sorrowful singlehood! (I recently married a handsome Englishman at Hampton Court Palace!) My enchanted life is of course a mixture of luck and dogged determination—but I owe a lot of it to the law of attraction. You are the designer of your own destiny, and I truly believe that what you think about, you bring about. And for this reason, I implore you to create a vision board.
A vision board is nothing more than a visual collage of your dreams that helps you to manifest them into reality. The law of attraction states that we attract the things that we give the most attention to. For example, if you repeat the words “yellow, yellow, yellow” and you start looking around you, all the yellow things will automatically stand out. In exactly the same way, if you repeat your dreams to yourself over and over, you will be shocked to discover the ways in which they start coming true.
How to create a vision board:
Define the life you want. Ask yourself exactly where you want to be, exactly what you want to do, exactly where you want to live and with whom.
Find pictures of these dreams in old magazines or search for them on Google images. Don’t be embarrassed if your chosen photos contain nothing but castles, jewels, polo ponies, and princes. All that matters is that each picture you choose evokes an emotional response within you and represents something that you genuinely desire.
Find inspiring quotes to help feed messages of purpose and conviction into your subconscious and add these to the mix.
Paste your photos and inspirational words onto a piece of paper and put it up someplace where you will see it every single day. The mere sight of your vision board should make you happy. Every time you look at it, let it fuel your passion to go after your dreams.
Continue to focus your thoughts on the life that you know you are destined for—and don’t be surprised when you wake up one day and find yourself living it.
Counting Your Money (and Your Blessings)
You have cause for nothing but gratitude and joy.
—BUDDHA
If you’re anything like me, finance is not your forte and adding extra currencies to the mix hardly helps matters. This is precisely why girls like us must rigorously keep track of and count our money. But it’s equally important that we keep track of and count our blessings. It’s impossible to bring abundance into your London life if you are not grateful for the fact that you are already in London! If you are actively thankful for the blessings you already possess, and remind yourself daily of all you are grateful for, you are actually summoning even more abundance to you. This is why I keep a gratitude journal, and so should you.
Grab a notebook—or invest in something prettier with a soft leather cover.
Every morning, jot down five things that you are thankful for—your family, your friends, your health, the boy in your life, the city that you live in, the day-to-day joys that occur just because you’re in England…
Don’t
worry about your handwriting—just get them down on the page, and as you do so feel the gratitude in your heart. The gratitude should be so intense and so genuine that you can feel tears coming to your eyes because for those few moments, you remember precisely how much these things mean to you.
Next, be grateful for the things that are coming your way: a UK work permit, your dream job, your dream man…Be specific and be detailed. List the things you are thankful for in the present tense. Whether you have them yet or not is irrelevant—the gratitude you feel for the fact that you will have them should be just as real as it is for the things you already have.
Notice how your mood changes almost immediately. If you start your day by reminding yourself of your blessings, you are naturally empowered to deal with any obstacles (financial or otherwise) that you might encounter before bedtime.
RECOMMENDED READING:
Confessions of a Shopaholic by Sophie Kinsella
I’m sure you’ve probably read it already, but if you haven’t, you need to—not the movie, not the spin-off books, but the original novel that started it all. When I first read this book, I was convinced that it was based on my life—a girl living in a trendy SW flat, drowning in debt, chasing after cute British clothes and even cuter British boys? (Come on, clearly I inspired the plot in some way.) I love this book because our fair heroine, Becky Bloomwood, eventually shows us that living within our means does not ruin our chances of living happily ever after. What can I say? Sometimes classic chick lit is downright inspiring.
RECOMMENDED VIEWING:
The Secret DVD by Rhoda Byrne
The entire idea of The Secret has caused quite a stir recently, yet when I first heard about it, I thought, “But that’s exactly what I’ve always done!” Basically, The Secret features a series of authors, philosophers, doctors, quantum physicists, and entrepreneurs expounding on the power of positive thinking and how it can be applied to defining and claiming the life you were destined for. Like mind over matter, The Secret shows us how mind over money begins with believing you deserve it and knowing that it will come.
1 However, you must never buy anything with the Burberry pattern as that now has very lower-class connotations; play it safe with a classic Macintosh trench coat.
2 Even stores that exist in both the US and UK—like Banana Republic—are much more expensive on the other side of the pond. When I found out BR was coming to London, I was so happy that I nearly threw a party. Then I saw their pricing: a tank top that costs $25 in the US costs £25 (or $40) in the UK.
3 From central London, the tube stops running approximately thirty minutes after midnight.
4 “I never have more than one drink before dinner. But I do like that one to be large and very strong and very cold and very well-made.” —James Bond (Casino Royale)
5 Just in case you’re wondering, Marks & Spencer is the best place for cute and affordable “knickers.”
6 Buddha is said to have given a silent sermon during which he simply held up a flower and gazed at it.
7 Most American “chocolate” cannot legally be called chocolate in Europe since the cocoa content falls below their strict legal standards.
NINE
EXPAT ESSENTIALS
When it’s three o’clock in New York, it’s still 1938 in London.
—BETTE MIDLER
Parable #7
The place is London. The date is the day before Thanksgiving. I was grocery shopping in Waitrose when I spotted a blond woman doubled over in tears in the baking aisle. I could tell by the way she was perfectly groomed that she was probably American (but even if that didn’t give it away, I could see a giant turkey in her shopping trolley).
I asked if she was okay.
“I can’t find marshmallows!” she sobbed. “How am I supposed to make yams without marshmallows? I’ve looked everywhere…How hard can it be to find marshmallows? I hate this country!”
As she continued hiccupping hopelessly, I gently suggested that she try Partridges, a gourmet food store on King’s Road that specializes in American products. She looked at me like I had just offered to give her a million dollars.
I’m glad I was able to help.
For those times when you simply can’t go another day without Ritz crackers, Pop-Tarts, and Apple Jacks, here are three places that stock those essential (almost always fattening) foodstuffs that make us proud to be American:
Partridges. It’s expensive here (think $9 for Stove Top Stuffing)—but I have been known to indulge my craving for Instant Quaker Oatmeal (Maple Brown Sugar flavor) on more than one occasion. www.partridges.co.uk
Whole Foods. I think the American expat community breathed a collective sigh of relief when Whole Foods opened its flagship European store on High Street Kensington. Finally a place that understands our needs! The shop is three stories high, is the location of London’s first ever food court, and is staffed almost entirely by friendly Americans. They even offer “Thanksgiving consultants” to help our frazzled countrymen in their time of need. They are also very expensive, but they bake a mean corn bread and actually know what you’re talking about when you ask for corn syrup or cranberry sauce. www.wholefoodsmarket.com/stores/kensington
Sky Co. A great online service that delivers your favorite American groceries to your door. Thanks to them, you never have to wait too long when your stomach starts yearning for Goldfish crackers. www.skyco.uk.com
Parable #8
The setting is London. The date is the day before Halloween. I find myself breaking into tears in the middle of the street. I have been to five stores, including Whole Foods. I have called countless online vendors. But no matter what I try, it seems hopeless. I can’t find dry ice! And my Halloween party is tomorrow!
Oh, how smug I was when I comforted that poor American woman about her marshmallows. But there I was at my wit’s end—just like her! Why is dry ice so hard to find? For god’s sake, they hand it out for free at every grocery store in America! My English husband didn’t understand my frustration—mainly because he’d never seen dry ice before and had no idea how magical it could be and how essential it was for an authentic Halloween party.
Finally, I called an industrial ice supplier.
“We can give you some for eighty pounds,” the woman on the phone told me. “And that’s assuming you understand that dry ice is not for domestic use.”1
“Um, of course,” I lied. “But exactly how much ice would eighty pounds get me?”
“A piece about the size of a brick.”
Right. Rather than pay $150 for a large ice cube that she’d already told me I couldn’t legally use, I hung up and called another industrial ice supplier. (Can you tell I was desperate to throw the perfect party?)
“Listen,” the guy tells me, “if you come to our Heathrow warehouse around 7 a.m. tomorrow—I’ll give you some on the sly. But you can’t tell anyone.”
So my husband and I got up early and drove nearly ten miles outside of town to make a back-alley dry-ice pickup. And I’m so glad we did.
I put dry ice in dozens of mini cauldrons around our flat and the Brits went wild. They’d never seen anything like it in their lives. Those drunk, costumed Englishmen were like giddy schoolboys in a mad scientist lab—pouring dry ice into their drinks, into the bathtub, into their beer…by the end of the night, someone had dumped the entire cooler of contraband ice into the shower and turned it on full blast. Years later, English friends still refer to that party as “Gorillas in the Mist.”
The lesson? American-themed parties make you stand out as a hostess. (They also allow you to fulfill any homesickness you might be feeling around these US holidays.) So every year I make sure to throw a 4th of July party (the Brits go berserk when I serve key lime pie), a Halloween party, and a Thanksgiving dinner. I even do an occasional Groundhog Day cocktail party—which is hugely popular, especially when I project live broadcasts of Punxsutawney Phil’s prognostications.
Long ago I learned that it’s okay not to b
e English. What’s not okay is being ashamed that you’re not English. So embrace those nutty American traditions, make an effort to be authentic, and show those stuffy Brits that when it comes to holidays, no one does it better. (Just try not to get thrown in jail for using dry ice.)
Making English Friends
Never refuse an invitation, never resist the unfamiliar, never fail to be polite and never outstay the welcome.
—LEONARDO DICAPRIO
During my first summer in England, I read a fantastic new novel2 set in London—the themes of which were keeping me permanently distracted. Aside from a rather elaborate murder plot, the book was about an American girl who’d regularly head to Hyde Park at sunrise to watch the early morning joggers go by. Of course, it wasn’t long before she caught the eye of a dashing upper-class English boy who happened to be running past her—and soon the two of them were madly in love. Aside from the getting up at dawn part, I was hoping to see if this approach might work for me.
But no such luck.
I’d patiently sit on my park bench for hours upon hours—watching people jog around the duck pond or row along the Serpentine; watching children with their adorable school uniforms clamber around on the Princess Diana Memorial Playground. I knew some of these humans had to be English, but it was as if an invisible glass wall existed between us—keeping our worlds divided. And soon I came to realize that meeting people in England simply by “catching their eye” was pure and utter fiction.
Like it or not, in England you don’t strike up casual conversation with strangers. You just don’t. You could sit next to the same person on the same train for twenty-five years, and you still wouldn’t dare speak to them. Anyone who breaks this inherent English rule is deemed dangerous at best.
In large American cities, everyone comes and goes so quickly that there is a general openness to new blood and new friendships. But in London, everyone is already firmly and happily ensconced in their college social circle, so there is very little incentive for them to make new friends.
