by Reece Butler
“Why did I forget all this?” he asked.
“You took a bottle of whiskey from their car,” explained Max. “While I drove, you drank, all the way home. You practically flowed out of my truck when I dropped you off. I’ve taken some psych since then. I figure you didn’t want to remember, so you blocked it.” He finished his coffee. “If I’d connected your nightmares to that night, I’d have told you years ago. I figured you were better off not remembering.”
“That’s like sending kids to bed three quarters of the way through a horror movie. They never know how it turns out.”
Max set his empty mug on the counter. “Do you remember anything about our fight the other day, or what happened after?”
Eric took his time, cracking eggs into the bowl and whipping them. Max had kept his head that night, while he’d gone berserk. Thanks to Max, he didn’t go to prison for assault. Max was now the town sheriff, and a damn good one. The truth would come out, so he might as well be up front about it.
“Yeah, I remember,” he said.
“What are you going to do about it?”
Eric poured the eggs in the pan and lowered the heat. He got out the cheese and grater.
“What, specifically, are you talking about?” he asked, though he had a damn good idea.
“You had sex with Doctor Meshevski in the clinic.”
“So? We’re both adults.”
“And as adults you should have used a condom.”
Eric slammed the lid on the pan and faced the sheriff. “Dammit, Max, do you know everything?”
“No, but it’s not from lack of trying.” He shrugged. “I walked in after. Brenda and Nikki headed over to your place and I took a gander around. Lots of evidence of sex, but none that a condom was used. Considering the way you two were all over each other in the park, I wasn’t surprised. Did Nikki tell you? Or did she keep it to herself, thinking you wouldn’t remember?”
Eric set his hip against the counter. “She told me. And then she said she wasn’t on the Pill.”
Max’s low whistle filled the kitchen. “You know about Marci, right? That gal’s as fertile as a turtle, Myrtle.”
“God, you sound like your mother.” Sandra Gibson loved to use expressions she’d heard in childhood, or ones she gleaned from Dallas and the other crazy shows she loved.
“Yours will go nuts if she finds out there’s a grandbaby on the way.” Max smirked.
Eric turned back to the stove. “Yeah, I know. That’s why I want Matt to marry Nikki if she’s pregnant.”
“Why not you?”
Eric stopped filling Max’s plate. His spatula was full.
“You want to eat your breakfast, or wear it?”
Chapter Twenty-Seven
“You spent the night on the clinic’s hard, narrow bed when Eric has a huge super-king? Why?” demanded Brenda.
“Because Eric was in it!” Nikki tried to push past, but Brenda wasn’t moving.
“Again, why?”
“He told me to marry Matt to give my baby the Frost name, and have her raised on the Circle C. I said I would raise my daughter myself. Only, he insisted I was carrying his son.”
“And?”
“And I could tell he didn’t like it. So I, well, ran away.”
Gad, it sounded like she was such a coward. She’d been angry at Eric’s demand, but even more, at the way her heart had agreed with him. She’d been raised with one parent. While her mother did the best she could, she and Marci had missed so much. She wanted her child to have the best life possible. Two parents, with Eric stopping by here and there, more like an uncle than anything else, would give her baby a far better life.
But at what cost?
Brenda had that look she’d come to learn meant she was thinking. Nikki didn’t like what might come out of her mouth. As a nurse she was excellent. As a friend, she was wonderful. But that also meant she wanted Nikki to have what Brenda thought best. Even if it didn’t match what Nikki wanted.
But, what did she want, really?
More of that fantastic sex with Eric. Some slow loving from his brother. And a baby of her own to love in a place where she could put down deep roots.
Roots were good, but not ones that would end up strangling her. Would Eric and Matt deny her the freedom to keep her profession? Or would they support and encourage her, as Lance and Simon did for her sister? Even if the twins were overprotective because of the baby, it meant they cared.
Marci knew that her men would do anything for her. For years she’d had to be careful not to upset Ted, her slimeball husband. Now she could now let her men protect her while she did what she most enjoyed: nurturing those she loved and caring for her home.
That was not Nikki’s dream. She wanted the same type of loving home, but with someone else doing the work to keep the home and family going. She didn’t want to deal with all those daily decisions and actions that weighed her down. She had enough of them at work. What she decided to do, or not, affected the lives of her clients. As in whether they had a quality life to live, or not.
“I don’t like that look on your face,” said Brenda, interrupting her thoughts.
“You know Marci and I grew up without a father. Considering they were both bums, it was a good thing.” Nikki’s chest tightened. Her throat began to swell. “We swore we wouldn’t have a baby without a husband, but that was before I became a doctor. I can afford to raise my daughter by myself. I don’t need a man to force me to stay home, to turn me into a mousy housewife, and destroy my life!”
Needing something to occupy her hands, Nikki picked up her lukewarm coffee. There had been no cream that morning so she’d used the powered stuff. Even before she tasted it the smell of it made her gag. She hastily put it back on the counter and pushed it away as far as she could. She’d get a good cup of coffee from the diner when she had a moment.
“You ready to listen now, Doctor Meshevski?”
“Since you obviously won’t let me past until I do, go ahead.”
“You’ve been in Climax for a couple of months now, right?”
“Brenda, what are you—”
“Answer the question, please.”
“Yes.”
“Your sister married a pair of ranchers, one of whom is known to enjoy being in charge. Nod if you agree.”
She nodded, though she rolled her eyes at the same time. Brenda stuck her fists on her ample hips and glared up at her.
“Is there any woman in town, just one, who is forced to do anything she really does not wish to do? Any who are afraid that they will be harmed by their men?”
Nikki had to look away. She’d seen beaten-down women cowering in the hospital. They sometimes said they’d had falls that didn’t match up with the physical evidence. No one in Climax behaved that way.
Women like Aggie blossomed when their husbands showed them how much they loved them by giving them what they craved. It didn’t matter that other people didn’t understand or want to be treated that way. It was right for Aggie and Keith. And Marci and Lance.
Would it be right for herself, as well? Maybe. But what if she encouraged it, and then found out she was wrong? Neither man would move away. She’d be the one who had to leave everything she’d come to love.
“Women here aren’t afraid of being harmed,” she admitted.
“Excuse me, did you say something?” asked Brenda with saccharine sarcasm.
Nikki had to face the truth. She wanted to laugh like Marci and Aggie, knowing she was loved and appreciated for who she was. She also wanted to shiver in delicious apprehension when her man gave her That Look.
Eric’s offer to take the heavy weight off her shoulders severely tempted her. She couldn’t quite imagine having someone to lean on, even just for a while. She was so tired of being strong, of being the one others looked to for help. But she’d learned to never trust a man, and to be wary of most women as well.
“I’m afraid,” she whispered, torn between wanting and dreading.
> Brenda stepped forward. She put her arms around Nikki’s waist. “I know, hon. Love is like that.”
Nikki pulled back. “I didn’t say anything about love!”
“Not in words. Tell me, what was Eric like at the ranch yesterday? Did the noise and mess of the children bother him?”
“No, he played with the boys until they were laughing. He admired Florrie’s new apron, noticing she’d made it herself.” Nikki closed her eyes, remembering. She sighed. “When he took Sophie in his arms…oh, Brenda!”
She blinked back tears. Eric had gently cradled the baby girl. Sophie’s head went in the palm of his right hand with her body down his forearm. He held her securely against his chest with his left hand. She’d seen a flash of something that could be longing before he smiled and tickled the baby. She’d cooed back, a natural-born flirt.
“Sophie was fussy during dinner,” said Nikki. “Eric insisted on holding her in a chest pack so her parents could relax and enjoy their food. He even got up from the table to change her, without saying a word.”
“I got Derek a T-shirt when I was pregnant for my first child. It said Real Men Do Diapers. He wore it proudly.” Brenda smiled fondly. “Though he insists otherwise, Eric would make a great father.”
“When he’s around,” Nikki replied with exasperation. “He’ll be gone soon. Heaven knows when he’ll be back.”
“Women, and children, have always coped with their fathers having to work away from home. At least you have lots of relatives here.”
“Just Marci. And Simon and Lance now.”
Brenda laughed. “Sorry to break it to you, but when Marci married, she got the whole Tanner’s Ford Valley as extended family. And since you’re her sister, by extension, you got us as well.” She tilted her head and gave Nikki an appraising look. “Since there was only the two of you at home, you might not know what families do.”
Nikki looked at her blankly. She was still processing the thought of a huge extended family. Sharing the dining table with seven men, two other women, and their children, had been hectic enough. But she’d loved every noisy, chaotic moment.
“What families do?” she repeated.
“They meddle, Nikki. They stick their noses into the business of those they love.”
“What are you saying?”
Brenda patted her arm. “You’ll find out soon enough. Is Marci enjoying her new life?”
She nodded absently. It all was suddenly too much. Marci no longer needed her. Without that focus, she felt almost empty. She’d worked all her life to get what she now had, but it wasn’t enough. Suddenly she was cold to the bone. A trembling started deep inside and erupted as shivering.
“What’s the matter, hon?”
“I…didn’t sleep much last night.”
Nikki numbly watched Brenda go to the heated-blanket closet. She removed one of the fleece blankets they used for patients in shock, or needing sudden warmth. Brenda wrapped it around her. It helped on the surface, but not deep inside.
“There’s no one here,” said Brenda, “and Doc Hudson will be back from fishing in a bit. I’m taking you home. You need a lot more than sleep, but that will be a good start.”
Nikki numbly let Brenda guide her to her car. She was placed in the passenger seat as if she was a child. She stared out the window, seeing nothing, feeling empty.
“Marci doesn’t need me anymore,” she whispered. It was the loudest she could talk.
“Yes, she does. But as a sister and a physician, not as a parent.” Brenda flashed her a glance as she slowed to turn the corner. “You’ve been taking care of people all your life. In Eric, you’ve discovered someone strong enough to lean on. The body and mind holds on until the possibility of relief is in sight. Then, sometimes, it crashes.” She stopped the car, turned it off, but didn’t get out. “Now that Marci is safe, and Eric is here, you’re crashing.”
Though she heard every word, she couldn’t understand what it meant.
“I’m just so tired of it all.”
“What you need is to forget everything, and just feel,” said Brenda.
“Feel?”
“If you give Eric all of your burdens, just for a while, you could relax and just be. You’d have nothing to worry about because he’d be in charge. He’d make all the decisions, taking over responsibilities you’ve carried all your life. Just for a while.”
Nikki bit her lip, trying to think through the fog filling her brain.
“You mean, act like a child?”
“I wouldn’t call it that.” Brenda rested her hand on Nikki’s arm. “There’s nothing wrong with being cherished. It’s wonderful to have your man meet every one of your needs without you having to say a thing. All you have to do is to feel, and to be yourself.” She gently touched Nikki’s chest, over her heart. “You’ve been giving from your heart for so long that it’s almost empty. Let Eric, and Matt, fill you up.”
“Fill me up?”
Brenda’s eyes suddenly widened. She pressed her lips together, but a laugh burst out.
“I didn’t mean physically, hon, but that’s right on the money as well.”
Nikki flashed to a vision of Eric and Matt filling her while she lay back and enjoyed it. Heat blossomed from her core, banishing the chill. She pushed the blanket away from her hot neck and face.
“Looks like I’m on the right track,” said Brenda, still chuckling. “Let’s get you fed and into bed. Have a good sleep and think about what you want. Not what’s best for anyone else, and not what you think you should want. Think of what you need, deep in here,” she tapped Nikki’s chest again. “I think submitting to Eric’s caresses, and whatever else he gives you, will help you relax.” She winked. “A couple or ten orgasms wouldn’t hurt, either.”
Nikki looked around as Brenda climbed out of the car, but Eric’s truck was gone. She heaved a sigh of relief. She wasn’t ready to face him. Not yet. But after a good sleep, and a long, soaking bath…
Chapter Twenty-Eight
“Wrench.”
Eric absently slapped it into Kenny’s hand. They were halfway through tuning up Miss Perkins’s old Chevy. He was supposedly helping, but his mind wasn’t on tappets and spark plugs. It was on the woman who’d walked out on him.
“She didn’t just walk out,” he complained. “She stole my ride!”
“Did you get it back?”
“Yeah, but that’s not the point.”
“I’m laughing at you, buddy,” replied Kenny without lifting his head. “It’s about time some woman screws your head sideways.” He snorted. “Since you’re here with me, and she’s somewhere else, your problem is lack of screwing.”
“Speaking of screwing, how is Susie?” Eric shot back. He immediately winced. “Shit, I shouldn’t have brought that up. Sorry, bud.”
“Susie is just fine.” Kenny drew out the last two words. He lifted his head from under the hood. After wiping his cheek, applying a new streak of black grease, he grinned.
Eric looked closer. He’d been so wrapped up in the whole thing with Nikki that he hadn’t noticed the change in his old buddy. Kenny fell for Susie the first time he saw her. She was a leggy twelve, her sister a quiet fourteen when their drunken mother arrived in town. Since then, she’d grown into a beauty. Unlike her older sister, Susie didn’t much like school. Her looks were all she had to escape Climax.
Kenny was just a mechanic, happy to one day take over his father’s garage, so she’d set her sights on becoming Mrs. Eric Frost. She put her claws into any girl who so much as looked at Eric. Since he didn’t want to date any of them, that was not a problem. But she hadn’t let up. Her mother ran off with a boyfriend a couple weeks before Susie finished her senior year, leaving nothing but bills and hard feelings.
Eric found out she’d hung on for a while after he disappeared, then found her way to Vegas and got married. It didn’t work out, so she’d come running back to Kenny. He’d taken her in, until she left him again. And again. He’d been laughed a
t for taking her back, but he told Eric he was a patient man. He was sure Susie’s sparkle would dim to a glow one day, and he’d be there for her.
“I heard she found another husband,” said Eric. “Her third?”
“Yep, and he threw her out with nothing,” said Kenny cheerfully. “She came knocking on my door—”
“Again?”
“—and asked if she could come in. She’s changed.” He nodded his head. “Really changed.”
“For your sake, I hope you’re right.” Eric checked the large wall clock. Quarter to twelve. “I guess she’ll be hauling herself out of bed about now.”
Kenny slowly drew himself up to his full five foot ten. He was shorter than Eric, but broader, built like a bull. They’d been buddies since the day Pops dropped him off to learn about motors. They’d wrestled, of course, but never fought as if they meant it. Eric looked at Kenny’s tight fists. They would pack a mean punch.
“Susie gets up before me,” declared Kenny, quiet and intense. “By the time I get out of the shower and dress, she’s got a hot breakfast on the table. She’s at home right now, making stew for supper. Said she’d make me a red-velvet cake for dessert tonight.”
“Susie?”
Eric choked. Kenny slammed him on the back, making sure he ground his palm over Eric’s back. He’d have to soak the shirt to get out the grease. He waved off Kenny’s “help” before he got knocked sideways.
Considering how he hated being judged for not wanting to be a rancher, he shouldn’t cast stones at someone else. Maybe this time Susie would turn her life around and realize Kenny was what she’d been looking for all along.
“You’re a lucky man,” said Eric when he could speak. When Kenny relaxed his fists Eric leaned a hip against the old car. He dropped his head, thinking back. “Me and Susie talked a bit in high school.” He shot Kenny a look. “You know I never—”
“Yep. Me neither.”
Eric wasn’t surprised Kenny had never touched Susie. He could understand a man wanting a woman with an active past to be totally his, wanting no other but him, before they came together. Kenny had a hell of a lot of pride. Eric wouldn’t be surprised if he insisted on waiting until the wedding night to see her naked. Or that the man was still a virgin. He had certain values and would do what was right no matter the personal cost.
