by RC Boldt
She peers up at Becket, and they exchange a look before declaring in unison, “Totally getting it on.”
My eyes close in frustration, and I pinch the bridge of my nose with my thumb and forefinger. “Y’all are killing me right now.”
“Is that so?” Becket’s voice is dripping with mock surprise, and he adds, with a heavy Southern accent, “Well, you need to get over here and let me give you some sugar.”
Madison appears puzzled. “Sugar?” Suddenly, her features brighten. “Oh! That’s Southern for kisses, right?”
Dropping my hand, I open my eyes to see Becket softly pat the top of Madison’s head, much like one would do to a small child.
“You are learning, my sweet grasshopper. The ways of the Southern vernacular can be so challenging.”
Madison makes a sick face. “The grits, though.” She shakes her head emphatically. “I cannot get on board with that.”
“Preach.” Becket holds out a fist, and she taps hers to it. They both break off with a laugh, and I can’t help but smile at the two. Stepping forward, I embrace them.
“Thanks for coming. It really means the world to me.” Tears prick at my eyes as I look at them.
“We’re your friends. That’s what we’re here for.” Becket’s voice is softer, tender. Then he winks before leaning in, his tone laden with humor. “Just remember that knee move I taught you comes in handy if you need it.” When his eyes lift, focusing over my head, I realize he’s mentioning it for someone else’s benefit.
“Let’s hope I don’t get to experience the knee move, then.” Knox’s voice sounds from behind me, and its huskiness sends a thrill rushing through me.
He sidles up to me and casually places a hand at the base of my spine, but his attention rests on my friends.
“Thanks for coming.” Reaching out a hand to Becket, the two shake. When he turns to Madison, she steps up and reaches out to hug him.
Becket pipes up. “Well, we need to catch our flight.” He holds his arms out to me. “One more hug for the road?”
I step toward him and allow him to wrap me in his tight embrace. He presses a kiss to the top of my head and whispers, “Be careful. I don’t want to have to miss games because I got suspended for breaking some dude’s legs for you.”
Backing away to peer up at Becket, I laugh. “I love you, you know that?”
His eyes shine with both affection and humor. “I know.” He plants a quick kiss to my forehead. “Love you back.”
“See you on Monday.”
Madison and Becket wave as they exit the near-empty ballroom. Aside from us, only the catering employees remain, cleaning up. We made the most of my father’s party, and I’d actually enjoyed myself. My granddad and I danced a few times, and it was wonderful to get to see him again. Knox had even done some “rescuing” when a few not-so-pleasant individuals had cornered me, hungry for details about whether Knox and I were back together, for which I’d been grateful.
“Ready to head back?”
I turn to face Knox with a hopeful look. “Actually, do you mind if we—”
“Head out on the water?” he finishes with a knowing expression. At my nod, he answers, “Not at all.”
Extending his palm, those dark green eyes shimmer with a nearly unnerving intensity. “Let’s go.”
As I place my hand in his and we exit the mansion, it’s impossible not to wonder what might have been if things had turned out differently. If he hadn’t destroyed my trust in him, hadn’t eviscerated my love for him.
This man had long ago etched himself on my soul. Much like an old tree with carved initials in its trunk, the sentimental gesture signifying an undying love, Knox Montgomery had left his mark on me.
For some reason, though, I’m giving in to this chance, allowing myself to get lost in the moment with the one man—the only man—who’s ever possessed my heart.
“Do you see that?”
Knox slows the jet ski we’re riding and points up at the clear night sky where a shooting star is fizzling out.
“Yes.” My answer is breathless, due in part from feeling the hard cut of his abdominals, and I wrap my arms more snugly around his torso. I’m also partially lost to the memories which have been bombarding me since I climbed on the back of the jet ski with him tonight.
We used to go riding; it had been one of those special things we did together. Some Sundays, we’d ride and stop at one of the waterfront restaurants with a dock to have brunch. Other times, we’d head out at night, with the headlight of the jet ski illuminating our way to the uninhabited and secluded Sand Island.
Many times, Knox would lift the seat of the jet ski and withdraw a large, folded beach mat and we’d seek a spot for ourselves on the shoreline, slightly shielded by the large palm trees. We’d lie back and peer up at the stars, sharing hushed conversation about our plans for the future. Then we’d make love in the moonlight with nothing but the melodic sound of water lapping at the shoreline and our staggered breaths lingering in the air.
I realize he’s nearing Sand Island now, and his muscles tense beneath my embrace when he slows down, as if preparing to turn around and head back to the house.
Propping my chin on his shoulder, I muse, “Maybe we can stop for a bit.”
He turns his head slightly, and his beard brushes against my lips. I can’t resist dragging them across his cheek, and his sharp intake of breath sends shimmers of satisfaction rushing through me. Dipping my head, I place a kiss along the side of his throat and dart my tongue out to taste his bare skin, peppered from the slightly briny water of the Bay. I revel in the slight rumble that reverberates through his chest beneath my palms before he increases the speed of the jet ski toward the small island.
Knox kills the engine when we get to the shallow waters, and we hop off. With his hands gripping the handlebars, he guides the jet ski up on the bank a bit more before grabbing the small anchor and securing it. I venture up the shoreline slowly, taking my time to admire my surroundings and reminisce about the times we’ve been here before.
“Want to bring this along?”
I turn to find him holding the familiar folded beach mat.
Tipping my head to the side flirtatiously, I eye him. “Why, Knox Montgomery. Did you plan on deflowerin’ me tonight?”
His grin is mischievous. “Now, Miss Emma Jane. I’m terribly insulted by your insinuation.”
“I’m sure.” A smile spreads across my face. With a nonchalant shrug, I sigh. “I suppose that beach mat would come in handy for stargazing.”
I turn my back to him, continuing along the path leading to our old spot when I hear him mutter, “Stargazin’ ain’t all it’s good for.”
“There’s Cassiopeia, right there.”
“Ooh! I just saw another shooting star.” I point up at the sky.
We’re lying on the beach mat, gazing up at the sky. The unusually warm and slightly humid November night, combined with the soothing sounds of the waves, lulls us into a calmness.
“Make sure you wish on it,” Knox tells me, his voice deeper, more intimate.
I fall silent for a moment. Without turning my head, I keep my eyes trained on the sky, my voice barely above a whisper. “Do you ever wonder…” I trail off, afraid to voice the rest of my question.
I detect the movement of him turning his head to look at me before he whispers, “What might have been?”
My eyes drift closed, my chest tightening painfully. It’s been eight years, yet I still don’t feel like I’ve ever truly gotten over it—over him.
I brave a glance at him, just as he turns his face away, focusing on the sky.
“We’re different people now,” he murmurs softly.
I know he realizes he hasn’t answered my question. Maybe I’m being too pushy, too selfish in bringing up this painful subject. But the truth is, I wonder what might have been. If we’d be doing what we love.
If we’d be in love. Still.
“I’d sometimes fantasize abou
t you coming to Jacksonville.”
His sharp intake of breath alerts me to the fact that I’ve voiced my thought, but he still doesn’t respond.
I release a sigh laced with a touch of disappointment. “Tomorrow, we head back.”
“Yes, ma’am.” His voice is subdued, almost thoughtful.
Inhaling a deep, fortifying breath, I decide to be brave and throw caution to the wind once more. Shifting to my side, the breeze tousles a lock of hair that came free from my clip during our ride. Before I can tuck it back, Knox reaches out and tenderly smooths it behind my ear. His eyes search mine, a hint of vulnerability flickering across his features.
“You’re breathtaking.”
His sentiment urges me on, and I press my lips to his softly. My intentions are for a simple, innocent kiss. To give in to the urge to explore the softness of his lips beneath mine.
That all disintegrates when he makes a harsh sound in the back of his throat and drags my body over the top of his.
My sports bra and thin cotton shorts were all I had since I hadn’t packed a swimsuit, and the moment my bare midriff comes into contact with the solid warmth of his muscled torso, my body goes up in flames.
He deepens the kiss, his tongue sweeping inside to toy with mine, and I rock myself over the prodding hardness beneath his board shorts. His hands glide down my back to grip my ass and swiftly pull me down as he rolls his hips upward, pressing into the spot right where I want him—ache for him—most.
He breaks our kiss to shift our bodies, positioning me beneath him, and his thighs straddle my hips. Moonlight casts an ethereal glow around his silhouette and he watches me with an intensity while slowly skimming his palms down over my breasts before he slides his thumbs beneath the bottom elastic band of my sports bra.
“May I?”
My lips quirk slightly. “Knox Montgomery’s asking for permission?”
He smirks. “I am a gentleman, after all.”
My tongue darts out to wet my bottom lip, and his eyes drop, tracking its movement. “Maybe I don’t want a gentleman tonight.”
His eyes lock with mine, expression turning predatory, and the scorching heat within the expanse of green causes my nipples to harden instantly.
Knox lifts the sports bra up, helping me get it over my head, and tosses it aside. A sexy smirk plays at his lips when he lowers his head to my breast. “Then you won’t get one.”
Once he captures a nipple between his lips, laving it with his tongue and suckling it deliciously, a surge of heat shoots straight to my core. Instantly, my hands fly to his head, gripping the short strands between my fingers, and I both hear and feel his groan.
He shifts to the other breast, paying the same homage to that nipple, and the slight breeze that hits my breast, now damp from his mouth, sends a shiver through me at the sensation.
“Knox.” I gasp. “I need you.”
Releasing the decadent suction of his mouth on my nipple, he protests, “But I’m not done yet.”
Without warning, I frame his face with my hands, tugging him closer, and rise up, fusing our mouths together. My lips work over his in a hot, feverishly wet kiss. I draw away and wait for his hooded eyes to lock with mine.
“I need you. Now.”
One edge of his lips tilts up. “So demanding.”
He shifts to his knees, still straddling me, and shoves my shorts down past my hips and ankles before I gently kick them off. At the sight of my body, now illuminated by the moonlight, his expression gives me pause. There’s a trace of reverence in it, mixed with something else I’m unable to decipher.
Calloused fingertips trail down my sides, and his touch elicits shivers throughout me. When he skims over my hipbones and veers to my center, my breath catches in my throat.
Suddenly, he freezes, his eyes flying to mine in alarm.
“What is it?”
He grimaces. “I don’t have any condoms.”
Warmth unfurls within me at this disclosure, because that means he hadn’t planned for this.
“It’s okay.” I hesitate, my voice becoming more faint. “I’m clean and on the pill.”
He searches my features, studying me solemnly before he finally speaks in a tone that’s soft and subdued. “Are you sure?”
Running my palm along one firm pectoral before sweeping it down to the center of his abs, I slip two fingertips beneath the waistband of his board shorts. I graze the tip of his cock and gather the moisture seeping from it. Bringing my fingers to my lips, I place them in my mouth and suck his salty essence from them.
He drags in a ragged breath, and his eyes pinch closed in a wince. Then they flare open, flaming with such intense heat it causes my breathing to stutter. Knox rolls off me and onto his back, quickly ridding himself of his shorts before turning his face to mine. Wordlessly, I straddle him, watching him fist his hard cock and guide it to my entrance as I slowly lower myself on him.
Our mingled gasps sound as we savor the way it feels to have no barrier between us. I instinctively roll my hips, and his hands fly to steady me. His hooded gaze holds mine.
“I’m not gonna last long.”
I clench my inner muscles and watch his eyes fall closed before they flash open, dangerously.
“You did that on purpose.”
“Maybe I like when you lose control.” I give him a saucy wink.
His fingers clench my hips tighter. “You think you can handle me?”
“Without a doubt.”
With an unyielding grip on my hips, he thrusts deep, simultaneously pulling me down on him, and robs me of breath. He continues this rhythm, and I surrender myself to the intoxicating sensation of him inside me.
“Knox,” I moan breathlessly as I grow wetter, nearing the precipice of my orgasm.
His movements become more frantic, frenzied, as he thrusts deeper. “Touch yourself.”
His command has my eyes flying open to find his own centered on me. They flicker to where our bodies are joined before he raises them again. “I want to watch you rub your clit and come all over me.”
Lord have mercy, this man’s the only one who’s ever managed to drive me close to orgasm by his words alone. Reaching down, I finger my clit in circles. I’m teetering on the brink and know it won’t take long before I find my release.
“Damn.” His voice is raspy, hoarse. “So fucking beautiful.”
My orgasm crashes over me, and I cry out his name, continuing to circle my clit with one finger and ride out the pleasure as he thrusts frantically, harder, and deeper. His near punishing grip on my hips doesn’t register as he pulls me down on him with a force that has me sucking in a sharp breath. My inner muscles clench and release his cock repeatedly, and I feel a surge of wetness just as Knox releases a soft groan, reaching his own climax. His grip loosens slightly, and I slump gracelessly upon his chest, the only sound amidst us is our labored breathing.
He mumbles something against my hair that I can’t quite make out, but I don’t have the energy to inquire about it. As my breathing slows, I close my eyes and concentrate on the soothing sound of his beating heart beneath my ear. One of his hands grazes my back in a slow, comforting caress, and right now, I’m faced with frightening truths: I never truly fell out of love with Knox Montgomery.
And I have no idea if I’ll ever manage to tell him my secret.
EMMA JANE
FOUR MONTHS AFTER MOVING TO JACKSONVILLE
“Becket, I’m scared.”
I’m trying my best not to burst into tears because I know it won’t do me any good. I also know that something isn’t right. It feels like my body’s attempting to turn itself inside out, revolting, as fierce, shooting pains pierce deep.
“I’ve got you.” He speaks in calm, even tones, in contrast to the vehicle’s engine revving as he accelerates, navigating the heavy Saturday night traffic to get me to the hospital. “It’s gonna be okay, Blue.”
I’m in the passenger seat of his SUV, doubled over, my arms wrapped like a
vise around my middle. When the worst of the pain hits, it thankfully doesn’t last long because everything grows fuzzy before it fades to black.
A FEW HOURS LATER
“Blue?”
My eyes flutter open weakly at the sound of Becket’s voice. I inspect my surroundings and discover that I’m lying in a hospital bed. He’s perched on a chair beside me, holding my hand in his.
“What happened?” I wait for the fog to further recede from my brain to fully awaken. Thankfully, I’m no longer in such excruciating pain. “Was it food poisoning?”
When Becket’s dark eyes rise from their concentrated focus on our joined hands, I’m shocked to find them filled with pain.
He shakes his head, averting his gaze again. Leaning closer, he presses his lips to the top of my hand. They linger there, and I feel a drop of moisture immediately follow.
“Becket?” The confusion in my voice is mixed with trepidation. “What’s going o—” I break off the moment he raises his head.
His eyes are brimming with tears, and one makes its escape, rapidly descending down his cheek.
His voice is low, subdued, as he gently breaks the news, informing me of the emergency surgery. Then he holds me while we both succumb to our tears.
But even as I give myself over to the grief, a traitorous part of me desperately wishes another man was holding me instead.
34
Knox
PRESENT
SUNDAY
I peer over at Emma Jane, who’s currently asleep in the passenger seat, her head tipped at an odd angle. I told her to recline the seat if she wanted to, but she insisted she was fine and wanted to keep me company on the drive back.
I feel marginally guilty for being the cause of the dark circles beneath her eyes and her lack of sleep. But only marginally, because repeatedly making love to her beneath the stars last night had been nothing short of magical. When it came time to head back to my house, we’d both been reluctant. Our time on the island had felt like we’d been encapsulated in our own world.
