by Eden Finley
“You’ve been circling me like a vulture. I’m fine. You’ll get your inheritance when I’m gone.”
Odie and I groaned at Dad’s lame-ass attempt at a joke.
“Please go to Target and buy some clothes,” Odie begged. “You don’t even have to go to the local one. A new mall opened in the next county over. Go there.”
He was right. All I’d done since I got home was hide and sulk.
There was nothing more I wanted than to have Pip with me, distracting me from the fact my father was getting weaker right in front of my eyes and there was nothing I could do to stop it. But that would involve telling her all the shit I’d been hiding from her for years. She had no idea an entire town hated me or that I joined the military to get out of here.
This was my hell, and there was no escaping it. Ever.
And I missed talking to Pip every day. Every fucking day. I didn’t realise how much I’d come to rely on her until I couldn’t call or talk to her anymore.
Logically, I knew I should’ve called her. I should’ve reactivated Facebook. But I wasn’t ready for her to know the truth. And I didn’t want people posting that I was back home. Privacy settings or not, I was paranoid enough to worry that friends knew friends of friends, and they in turn knew more friends. Not that I had many to begin with, but the world was small enough without adding social media to the connections.
I didn’t want to risk anything getting out, but sitting around the house was driving me crazy. I didn’t think my parents’ house was ever this clean. I’d scrubbed it from top to bottom. These weren’t the daily chores that were done often; I meant jobs you did once a year. They’d been done twice in three months.
“Fine, I’ll go out.” I stood from the couch.
“Progress,” Odie said. “And maybe when you get back, you’ll finally open up about the girl you’ve been pining for ever since you landed back on American soil.”
“How do you know it’s a girl?”
“Well, it certainly isn’t a guy,” Dad said. “Trust me. We’d know if our son swung that way.”
I rubbed my temples. “I meant I could be stressed about my job that you’re keeping me from.”
“I’m so sorry my death is coming between you and your important lifesaving work that is advertising.”
Frustration built in my chest. “That’s not what I mean.”
Dad looked at Odie. “I think our son left his sense of humour back in Australia.”
“What your father is trying to say, is if it was your job, you would’ve talked to us about it. Or Tony would’ve told us you were struggling. Instead, you’re locked up tight. Which can only mean one thing. Girl issues.”
I looked at the imaginary watch on my wrist. “Shit, look at the time. I better be going if I’m going to make it to Target before they close.”
“It’s a twenty-four hour one,” Dad said.
“I know.”
Odie threw me his car keys with a smile, and I left before they could say any more.
When Odie picked me up from the airport three months ago, we managed to sneak into the house before anyone could spot me.
I wasn’t so lucky this time.
In three months, the only sun I saw was when I’d go into our backyard. And even then, it wasn’t often because the fences were only six feet tall, so they did nothing to hide my six-five frame.
My feet froze as soon as I got to the driver’s side door of Odie’s car. Across the street, our neighbour was watering her garden. My eyes locked with Mrs. Jameson, and it was game over. The whole town would know I was home within the hour.
Fucking small towns.
Instead of driving to the next county over to go to Target, I decided to hit the local store. There was no point in continuing to hide. It would be out now.
As I pulled into the parking lot, I prepared myself for the stares I’d get once I was outside of the car.
It’d been seven years since I was last home, and twelve years since the cops turned up on my doorstep and arrested me. Surely, the town would be over it by now, right?
Wrong.
I got out of the car, but before I could reach the store, a police cruiser pulled up, cutting me off.
“Of course,” I mumbled.
“Gage Tanner,” Officer Wentworth said as he climbed out of his car. In the last twelve years he’d aged to the point every hair on his stupid head was white.
“Still a cop, I see. Would’ve thought you’d have been done for corruption by now.”
His partner was younger, probably my age, but obviously not from around here because he had no idea who I was and looked confused by Wentworth’s and my animosity.
“Funny, I thought you’d have been done for kiddie touching by now. Guess you’re New Zealand’s problem if your accent is anything to go by.”
I scoffed. “It’s an Australian accent.” Dickhead. “I don’t eat fush n’ chups.” That joke would’ve killed back home. Wentworth’s face was stoic.
My Aussie friends said I still sounded American. My dads said I sounded Australian. I had a weird in between accent.
“I assume you’re home because your dad is sick?”
Everyone knew everything in this fucking place.
“Yup. Only staying until he kicks the bucket.” I tried to swallow the lump in my throat at my emotionless tone, but I couldn’t give this asshole ammunition.
“Well, let’s hope that’s soon then.”
Yup. Asshole.
“Mind if I get my shopping done now?” I asked.
“Dunno. There’s likely to be teenagers in there. Might have to keep an eye on you, seeing as I arrested you for rape not that long ago.”
I blew out a loud breath. Don’t react. He wants you to punch him so he can arrest you again.
“Statutory rape,” I said through gritted teeth. “Funny how that first word gets forgotten by everyone in this town. Also, it was twelve years ago—when I was a teenager—and I was found not guilty, or did you forget that part?”
“Because you struck a deal with a corrupt judge.”
“Corrupt judge? More like the only person who was on my side.”
Wentworth turned to his partner. “The charge was reduced to sexual misconduct. He paid a fine, didn’t have to register as a sex offender, and got off scot-free.”
I tried to keep my voice calm, but it didn’t work so well. “Scot-free? You think this is scot-free? Being harassed by cops while I try to go shopping twelve years after my bogus arrest? Don’t you have real cases to solve?”
“Don’t get comfortable, Tanner. As soon as the ink’s dry on your dad’s death certificate, you’re out of here.”
“Deal. Don’t want to stay longer than I have to.” I went to walk off when his voice trailed after me.
“Maybe you could take your other faggot dad with you when you go. We’ve been trying to run them out of town for years. They’re stubborn sons of bitches.”
I froze. He’s pushing your buttons, he’s pushing your buttons, he’s pushing your buttons. Don’t punch him. Don’t fucking punch him. “You know, I thought I missed the bigotry of this town. Turns out, nope, you’re still a bunch of ignorant, homophobic fuckwits.” I tipped my head. “Officers.”
“Does Lucy know you’re back?”
His last barb made me tense, but I kept walking instead of doing what I really wanted to do, which was knock the fucker out.
I didn’t give a shit whether Lucy knew I was back or not. I wouldn’t go near her if my life depended on it. Gun to my head with the choice of pulling the trigger or talking to Lucy? I’d choose gun. Every. Time.
The cops followed me through the store. I was so focused on them watching me that I didn’t take much notice of what clothes I was piling into my arms. I only checked the sizes and then got the hell out. I could’ve been stocking up on ugly Hawaiian shirts for all I knew.
I couldn’t have been gone for more than an hour, yet the stares, being followed by police … “Here we
go again,” I muttered to myself.
When I got home, I grabbed my bags out of the car and stormed into the house.
“Uh-oh,” Dad said as soon as he saw me. He knew I was pissed.
“Odie, out back now.”
“Uh … I’m good here. Thanks.”
“You were the one who wanted me to get out of the house, so you’re the one who has to deal with the consequences. Buzz us if you need us, Dad.”
I didn’t need to look back to know Odie was following.
“What happened?” His tone was so defeated I almost didn’t want to tell him.
“Neighbour saw me before I even left. Wentworth pulled up behind me at the store and told me to get out of town the second Dad …” My jaw hardened as I gritted my teeth. “Why did you guys stay here? I don’t fucking understand.”
“Giving into their bigotry only lets them think they have a right to keep doing it.”
“I get you two have your own fight when it comes to this place. But after what they did to me? What they’re still doing to me?”
Odie sank onto the back stoop. “Your dad and I grew up here. It’s been our home for over fifty years.”
“Wouldn’t it have been easier to move somewhere else?”
“Your dad ran away from it once. Tried to be ‘normal.’ And if he hadn’t have done it, we wouldn’t have you. After he lost your mother and he came back, he said he didn’t want to run again. Even to somewhere where they’d be tolerant. This was his home, and he wasn’t going to be ran out of it again.”
“I get that,” I said. “This was home to me growing up, but there’s only so much I can take.”
Odie nodded.
“Wentworth is gonna come after you if you don’t leave when Dad passes.”
“He say that?”
“Not in so many words. Dropped a nice fag-bomb at me. Please tell me you don’t get that still? You and Dad have been together for, what, twenty-five years?”
“Twenty-eight. Longer if you include when we were in school.”
“And the town still treats you as if you were the only same-sex couple in the history of this stupid town. I know I’ve suggested it before, but you should move to Australia with me.”
“And do what?”
I shrugged. “Tony would give you a sponsorship and a job, for sure.”
“I wouldn’t be good at marketing after being a plumber my entire life.”
“You’ve ran your own business, and you know office crap. We’ll get you an administration job. I could use an assistant.” I tried unsuccessfully not to smile.
“Not on your life, kid.”
“Or my friend Spence owns his own company; you could work the phones. The sponsorship would be so you could get a visa and stay as long as you wanted. I don’t like the idea of you living here alone.”
“We have friends here too. This town isn’t only filled with assholes.”
“Could have fooled me,” I muttered. “Just … think about it? You don’t have to stay here to prove a point. And when Dad goes—”
Odie grunted in frustration and shut down the conversation. “You going to tell me about the girl?”
I knew there was no point in pushing further. Abrupt subject changes were the pinnacle of fighting in our household. It was the ultimate drawing a line in the sand. “Nope. Move to Australia and meet her for yourself. Although, I’m fairly certain she’ll want nothing to do with me when I get home.”
“Why’s that?”
“Because I was friends with her for seven years, slept with her for the first time the night before you guys called me with Dad’s news—”
“A bit of an overshare for your old man, but continue.”
“I haven’t spoken to her since. I didn’t want to drag her into my life here.”
He whistled. “You messed up big time. Maybe you should go home and try to work it out. Dad’ll be good for a few weeks yet. Who knows, he may last the full prognosis of six months.”
I shook my head. “I’d hate myself if I were to leave and something happened.”
“Invite Pip out here?”
“How did you know it was Pip?” I snapped.
Odie merely cocked an eyebrow, as if he were offended I could think he was so oblivious. “Please. We saw the way you two were with each other when we came to visit last year. I’ve been thinking it was her this whole time, and you just confirmed it.”
“I don’t want her to come here.”
“Right. Thought that was a long shot. Look, Dad won’t want you to put your life on hold while we sit and wait for him to move on. Give her a call. A text. Something. Anything.”
“I’ll think about it.” But that was a lie. I wasn’t ready. I was dealing with Dad and being back home; I didn’t want to bring Pip into the mix. I wanted to hold on to our perfect night a little longer before dragging an ugly reality into our lives.
“Good boy.” Odie stood and ruffled my hair.
“I’m not your pet.”
“Of course, you are. I always wanted a dog, but your dad gave me you. You’re the next best thing.”
“Sign of a true parent—admitting they wanted a puppy instead.”
“Hey, I’m the second-best father you’ve ever had.” He laughed.
Even though it was a joke, I hated the self-deprecating way he said it. Sometimes I wondered if he thought I saw him differently because he wasn’t my biological dad, but he was as much my father as dad was. “You’ve both been amazing parents. Even when all that shit happened here, you were both always by my side, defending me. I love you both, and I don’t say that enough.”
He waved me off. “We love you too. But I know Dad would want to hear that as well.”
“He’d follow it up with an inappropriate joke. He doesn’t handle the emotional stuff well like you do.”
“When he’s on his deathbed, it’s safe to say he’d want you to be emotional.”
I cocked my head to the side. “How are you going with it all? And I know how much of a shitty son I am that it’s taken this long for me to ask, but … are you okay?”
“I’m crushed. But it’s not like he’s choosing this.”
I stepped forward and hugged him. “Think about moving. If I can sort out my shit with Pip, I hope to give you grandkids one day.”
“I’d rather have a puppy.”
I was ninety-nine percent sure he was joking.
7
- PIP -
My leg bounced, my stiletto repeatedly jackhammering into the grass below my feet. The ceremony chairs were uncomfortable, and I couldn’t sit still. Then again, there was another reason I was uncomfortable, and it had nothing to do with being at Cole and Paige’s wedding.
Cole stood at the altar, along with Hunter and Blair next to him. I expected Spencer to be up there with them, but I guessed it would’ve been awkward to ask the husband of your ex-wife to be groomsman at your wedding—even if you were still the best of friends.
Reece and Spencer were sitting at the very back looking after all the kids—including Hunter and Sara’s twins. I swore the children were multiplying. And I’d be adding to the mix soon.
Guests were filling up the seats, and the bride was due any minute, but I couldn’t settle.
Garrett gripped my thigh, hard, stopping the constant moving. “He might not turn up.”
“That’s not why my leg is bouncing.” It was totally why. I got a message yesterday from Gage saying he was getting on a plane and he’d meet me here. But I had a perfect excuse to cover up why I was truly freaking out. “If you must know, your baby has made me do nothing but pee for four weeks straight.”
First try, the IVF worked. I was officially pregnant, but it was still surreal. I had minor symptoms like having to pee a lot, but apart from that, I wouldn’t have even known I was pregnant.
They only had two embryos. Two shots to get it right. It was a lot of pressure on my uterus. I was thankful it was successful.
Garrett laughed. “That�
��s my boy. Or girl.” His hand went to my non-existent bump, over the purple chiffon of my strapless dress. “You keep growing in there, little one,” he said, rubbing my stomach some more.
“Pretty sure we’re still at the embryo stage. He or she can’t hear you.”
“Any morning sickness?”
“I’ve been lucky, I guess. I remember Reece being sick as a dog with all her pregnancies. Maybe it hasn’t hit yet.”
“You should go pee now before the ceremony starts.”
“I should but I won’t. You never know when I might need an excuse to escape.”
He glanced over my head. “I’m guessing you’re gonna need one right about now.”
“Phew, I made it.” The deep, velvety voice that belonged to him had the ability to send a shiver straight through me.
I stiffened as Gage threw himself in the seat next to mine.
“Flight was delayed. I came straight here from the airport.”
I stared at him wide-eyed, unsure of what to do. Or say. He was wearing the clothes he wore the night he took me home from the pub. It was as if these past few months didn’t happen. Then I realised, he’d gone to Virginia with nothing but the clothes on his back. Did that mean he’d been wearing that suit for six months? I shook my head. He would’ve bought clothes over there. My absurdity almost made me laugh, but then I caught his eyes.
His cheeks seemed hollow and his eyes were baggy. His hair had grown, and he hadn’t shaved for days. Even though he was tired around the edges, he was still the hottest man I’d ever laid eyes on.
As I continued to stare with my mouth agape, I couldn’t bring any words to my lips.
Garrett nudged me and whispered, “I think the word you’re looking for is hi.”
“Uh, hey,” I croaked.
Gage smiled, and I was assaulted with a visual of his dimples. I quickly faced the front again.
“Hey, I think we need to—” At the same time he spoke, the ceremony music kicked in.
Part of me wanted to know what Gage was going to say, but the other part was still pissed off at him for leaving me for six months. If we hadn’t slept together the night before he abandoned me, I wouldn’t be this hurt. His dad was sick, I understood that, but what I didn’t understand was the silence and lack of communication.
