by Eden Finley
“You’re talking to Tony about me?”
“You think I’m not going to be checkin’ up on you?”
“Odie—”
“I wish I could be there with you. I do. But—”
“You’re not ready.”
“Just thought you should know.”
I ran a hand through my hair. “Sure thing.”
“Love you, kiddo.”
The phone disconnected.
Fuck, what was I supposed to do with that?
I should’ve gone back in the exam room, but with one phone call, Odie had me worried. Maybe I could go back to Virginia and set up an office in Odie’s den. He was right in saying I’d had too much time off, and we were swamped at work, but unlike the six months I stayed with them when Dad was sick and I was too distracted to work, this time I could work while being there for Odie. Did I want to go back to Clarion, Virginia? No. But Odie shouldn’t have been alone in this, and it was selfish of me to come back to Australia and leave him. I wondered if his so-called plans to move here were just a way to placate me and get me on the plane home, because he knew I wouldn’t have left him if he was struggling.
Odie had held it together throughout the sickness and funeral. He got blind drunk afterwards, but I thought that was to be expected—normal. I should’ve seen his strong façade had cracks, but I was too lost in Pip and trying to win her back.
I stared at my blank phone screen for a lot longer than I realised, because before I knew it, Pip, Garrett, and Blair exited the clinic.
“It’s over already?” I asked.
“How’s Joel?” Garrett asked.
I shook my head. “I dunno …”
My eyes met Pip’s, and the resignation in her face was unmistakable. Her voice was even more defeated. “Are you going to say goodbye when you leave this time?”
18
- PIP -
It was a low blow, but I was protecting myself—preparing for him to disappear again. If Gage had to leave, he had to leave. If something was wrong with Joel, then he needed to be Gage’s priority.
Gage stepped forward and wrapped his arms around me. “I’m not going anywhere. He was having a bad moment about Dad is all. I’ll call him tonight and make sure he’s okay.”
“If you need to go home, we can hold down the fort at work,” Garrett said.
That wasn’t entirely true. We were screwed at work. “We’ll get Sydney to help us again,” I said.
Gage scoffed. “Because they were so great last time. They’re the reason, we’ve got so much work to catch up on. We were lucky enough for the three of us to escape the office to come do this.”
“But we’ll manage if you have to go,” Garrett said. “Your father is more important. Especially right now.”
“I don’t need to go back. Not yet. How did the scan go?”
“Good,” Blair said. “All fine.” His smile was tight, and Garrett and I stared at him with perplexed expressions. While everything looked good, the baby was measuring smaller than it should’ve been. Didn’t necessarily mean anything at this point, but it was something they’d have to keep an eye on. The next scan would tell us more.
“What’s wrong?” Gage asked.
“Nothing to worry about,” I said. “But speaking of work, we should head back. I need that account I gave you yesterday for proofing. It needs to be sent off asap.”
“Right,” Gage said, his voice distant. “Sorry, what account was that again?”
“The butter one. You know, choose to die happy instead of thin?”
Blair’s eyes widened. “Please tell me that’s not an actual slogan you guys came up with?”
Garrett wrapped his arm around him. “Nah, it’s just what we call it. These companies come in and ask us to sell their shit, but there’s a game where we make honest adverts—what it should say but won’t sell. I’m top of the leader board for most inappropriate slogans.”
“That doesn’t surprise me,” Blair said.
I rolled my eyes. “Hey, I came up with the butter one.”
“I knew you guys were sad before, but—” Blair glared at his husband when Garrett playfully slapped him on the back of the head. “Okay, fine. You’re all super cool. Coming up with slogans for fun sounds like an awesome party.”
While we laughed, Gage zoned out.
It’d only be a matter of time before he went running back to Joel, and there was no way I was going to stop him. Grief was hard, and he should’ve been there for his Odie. What I was worried about was Gage shutting me out again, wanting to do it all on his own, and dropping off the face of the planet.
It didn’t matter I knew about his issues now. They were still issues, and he had the ability to cut me off and never come back. The thing keeping me calm was the fact I knew he’d rather do anything than go back to his hometown—even face a drop bear, which he still thought were real, even after eight years of living here. None of us wanted to put him out of his misery. We went camping once, and he didn’t take his eyes off the trees above him the whole weekend. Ended up with a stiff neck.
Good times.
“We should get back to it,” Garrett said and leant in to kiss Blair’s cheek. “See you at home.”
Garrett had come with us in the one car, and all way back into work, we kept sharing glances at each other. Gage was driving and acting distant.
Things didn’t improve back in the office.
Gage emailed me the files I asked for, and luckily, I checked it, because he sent through the gag ads instead of the real proofs. That kind of mistake could get him fired—even if his uncle was the boss. Had I sent that to the client without checking it, we would’ve lost the contract.
Instead of emailing him back, I went to his office.
“You okay?” I asked.
He lifted his head from his computer. “Yeah, why?”
“Want to check the files you just sent me and try that answer again?”
His brow furrowed, and when the image popped up, he cursed.
“You’re distracted—”
Gage frantically clicked his mouse, typed out a new email, and hit send. “I’ll do better. Sorry.”
“Not why I came in here. I’m not going to lecture you, but I am going to ask you if you’re okay again.”
He slumped back in his seat and held out his hand to pull me onto his lap. It hadn’t taken long for us to go from fiery and passionate to comfortable. The way he touched me wasn’t with the lust of a couple who’d been together a few weeks. The caressing and small rubs on my lower back were filled with love and adoration, as if we’d been a couple for years.
“I’m fine,” Gage said. “Like you said, just distracted. I’m sure everything at home is fine, and I’ll call Odie tonight.”
“Call him now.”
“He’ll be asleep.”
“If he’s as distressed as you think he is, trust me, he won’t be sleeping.”
“Good point.” He took out his phone and dialled his father, but after countless rings, it went to voicemail, and Gage hit end call. “No answer.”
“So, he must be sleeping it off.” I leant in and kissed the side of his head. “Focus on work for a few hours and call him again later.” I went to stand, but Gage gripped me around my waist.
Cupping my face, he pulled my mouth to his and kissed me softly. “I love you.”
“I know.”
He smiled, but it wasn’t full-blown.
“If you want to go back to the States to see your dad, you should go.”
“I don’t want to leave you again. I promised.”
I huffed. “You really think that’s how our relationship is going to work? I don’t want you to feel like a trapped prisoner. If Joel needs you, go home.”
“You’re my home.” His arms gripped me tighter, and it took me a while to realise what he was doing.
“You’ve already booked a plane ticket, haven’t you?” I shouldn’t have been pissed. I wasn’t angry that he needed to leave, b
ut was he going to tell me or leave a note again?
“I haven’t booked it, but I’ve looked. I couldn’t bring myself to hit the purchase button, because I don’t want you to be mad at me if I go.”
I closed my eyes and breathed deep to try to squash my anger at him. “You’re such a fucking male.” I tried to stand again, but he held onto me. When he realised I wasn’t going to let him win, he finally released me.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means you’re looking at the completely wrong thing. I’m not pissed at you for going to your dad. It wasn’t the leaving. It was the shutting me out part. You can’t do that again. It’ll kill me.”
Gage stood and wrapped me in his arms. “I won’t shut you out, but I also can’t leave. Work is swamped.”
“Work can’t afford to have you distracted. If I’d sent that campaign out, both of us could’ve been fired.”
He sighed. “I know. I’m sorry.”
It was a helpless situation. We were chained to our desks here, worried about what was going on with Gage’s dad, and unable to do anything about it.
Going home with Gage wouldn’t have been an option for me now. I had another scan in a couple of weeks, and then after that I’d be getting bigger, and it would be too much of a risk to fly.
I told my brain not to get ahead myself. Joel called in a bad mood. One bad mood. One phone call. I was sure he’d be better when Gage called him tonight.
***
He wasn’t better. In fact, he wasn’t answering his phone.
Gage paced, only wearing his boxer briefs in front of my bed. “What do I do?”
“Try him again later. He could be in the shower or on the toilet—”
“Or lying in a ditch somewhere.”
“You might be being a little dramatic.”
Gage shook his head. “You didn’t hear him on the phone. I’ve never heard Odie so … defeated. He’s miserable.”
“His partner died. Imagine if it was me and how you’d feel.”
He stopped pacing, and his face dropped. His skin paled. “Fucking, fucking, shit, fuck.”
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“I have to go.”
“What?” I exclaimed.
“You said it yourself. If it were you, how would I feel. I’d be gutted. You’re my world. If that came crumbling down, I wouldn’t want to live. I couldn’t live without you. Never.”
“Book a flight for the morning.” I tried to keep my tone devoid of emotion.
“Tony—”
“I’ll handle work. Garrett and I can team up. I can talk to your uncle about hiring some temps and move up some interns.”
In five minutes, he had a one-way flight booked and paid for. When he came back into my room, his gaze roved over me.
“I don’t know how long I’ll be gone.”
Rising up on my knees, I beckoned him with a crook of my finger. “Better make it memorable then.”
The growl that ripped from him was primal and raw, but when he wrapped his arms around me and pushed me down on the bed, all the love he had for me came out in the form of soft kisses and tenderness.
He explored my body and sucked a nipple into his mouth through my silk nightgown.
I moaned and felt his cock twitch against my thigh. He took his time, moving agonizingly slow. He’d become the master of gentle lately, as if proving his love to me with our bodies. The slow, languid lovemaking was great, and I could feel his genuine want for me—his proof of what we had—but I could also sense him holding back.
Gone were the first few times where he threw me down on the bed and lost control. I flashed back to the night of his dad’s funeral where he didn’t have the emotional capacity to get undressed, let alone be gentle. I wanted that Gage tonight.
I wanted to love him like it was our last time, because we didn’t know what he was going to find when he stepped inside his childhood home. Gage might be gone for a few weeks or a few months, and I didn’t know how I was going to go with that distance between us again.
I reached for my nightgown and leant up as I pulled it up and over my head. “I need you to fuck me.”
Gage pushed me back down and blanketed his body with mine. “We don’t fuck, Pip. This is so much more—”
“I need it.”
He rose to his knees between my legs, and his hands skimmed my thighs. “Why? Are you trying to make this not personal because you’re worried about me shutting you out again? Distancing yourself—”
I put my hand on his mouth. “The opposite. I want you to own me. Mark me and make me yours. When you’re ten thousand miles away, I want to still feel you. In a week, a month … however long you’re gone for. Fuck me like you mean it, because we both don’t know when we’ll get the opportunity again. When I’m the one making you lose control, I’ve never felt so wanted. Needed. Show me you feel the same way, so I have the courage to say goodbye in the morning.”
“Holy mother of …” He leapt off the bed as if it were on fire.
Rejection washed over me, and I covered myself with the sheet as I sat up. My face burned. “What? What’s wrong?”
His hand went to his boxer briefs, pushing down the bulge and gripping his cock tight. “Nothing, but I almost came from the things falling out your mouth.”
I chuckled in relief. “You can come with only words?”
“I can come from just thinking about you.”
“Are you going to do what I asked?”
He blew out a loud breath. “Okay, but I’m going to go down on you first because I don’t know how long I’ll last going balls to the wall.”
“Not quite how I put it, but I’ll take it.”
His strong—ridiculous—body moved towards the bed in a predatory way. One knee hit the mattress, and then his hands gripped the sheet and threw it off me, leaving me exposed. My body craved his warmth and his touch. He crawled his way up until his lips landed on my knee and then a thigh.
The scruff on his jaw scraped my skin and sent a pang of desire to my core. I was already writhing, and he hadn’t even gotten to the good part yet.
“Hands above your head,” he ordered.
Gage climbed my body and held my wrists together with one of his giant hands. His long arm allowed him to keep hold as his mouth trailed down my neck and chest and all way to my belly button.
“Keep your hands there.”
I shivered at his gruff tone and almost wanted to defy him to see what he’d do. But when his tongue caressed my skin, any act of rebellion was crossed off my list of possibilities. I was lost in his mouth, his touch, and the love he had for me.
His hands gripped my ass and pulled my hips off the bed so he could bury his face deeper between my thighs.
“Gage,” I whimpered.
His mouth devoured me, nipping and lapping at my pulsating clit. I got lost in breathlessness as my mind clouded. My hand came down into his hair, but a second later, it was pinned to the bed and being held in a death grip that was going to leave a bruise.
The way he was being rough was exactly what I wanted, and him pinning my hand to the bed turned me on even more.
His tongue never left me but moved to a teasing pace.
“No,” I managed to get out. “More.”
“Nuh-uh,” he murmured against me. “I told you not to move your hands.”
I whined, which made him laugh.
He continued his slow assault, and his free hand moved to my stomach and my ever-growing baby bump. He lifted his head for just enough time to say “I can’t wait until it’s our kid in there.”
The idea that this man was planning our future had tingles shooting down to my toes. Or maybe it was his tongue doing wicked things to me.
The hand on my stomach slowly inched its way down, and when he replaced his mouth with his fingers, two moving inside me and one rubbing little circles on my clit, my whole body shuddered in pleasure. I threw my head back and writhed underneath Gage. The he
at in my stomach pooled, and I knew it’d only be a matter of time before I—
He withdrew his fingers right when I was on the edge.
“Bastard,” I hissed. “You said you’d make me come first.”
“Did I? Or did I say I was going to go down on you first. Never said anything about letting you come.”
“I hate you so much right now.”
“No, you don’t. Roll over.”
I trembled in anticipation but did as he said.
Large hands gripped my hips, and I wanted to be put out of my sweet misery. I needed him inside me, like, yesterday.
“Gage …”
“Patience.”
Fuck, I couldn’t take it. My hand trailed down my stomach, and I pinched my clit. I needed friction. I needed to be touched. I just needed.
“Fuck me,” I begged.
Gage leant over my body and whispered in my ear. “Where do you want me to fuck you, Pip?”
My brow scrunched in confusion, not knowing what he meant. Pretty sure “on the bed” was the wrong answer.
His finger slid in between my ass cheeks, all the way down to my aching pussy. “Here?” He teased me for a few seconds, moving the pad of his finger from my clit to my hole but never fully going inside.
“Yes,” I hissed, getting impatient.
When his finger did another pass, it didn’t stop and went to my ass. “Or here?”
My wetness had coated his finger, and when it slid in, nerve endings I didn’t know existed roared to life.
“Holy fuck.”
“Will you let me?” he whispered.
There was a big difference between having a finger up there and something the size of Gage’s cock, but damn, if I didn’t want to give it to him.
“You can say no,” he said.
I shook my head, and he removed his finger.
“No big deal—”
I glanced at him over my shoulder. “No, I mean, I don’t want to say no. I want you.”
Gage’s smile made the nerves worth it.
Instead of getting straight to it, he leant over me again and turned my head so he could give me a punishing kiss that tasted like myself.
