“I still don’t know how I’m going to get her to accept the money, and frankly, it is a big deal to me. Elsie has become important to me. I really don’t want her to think everything I’ve done since we met was because I was playing some long game to get her to help me con my family.”
“What does it matter what she thinks?” He sat straighter and yanked his sunglasses off his face to glare at me. “Also, did you just say she’s become important to you? What the fuck, man?”
“Calm down to a mild panic.” I waved a hand at him. “I’m starting to care about her, is all. That’s why it matters to me what she thinks. It’s nothing to get worked up about, though.”
“Nothing to get worked up about?” He shook his head, his mouth dropping open. “That’s bullshit and you know it. You don’t do relationships. That’s why you’re my favorite wingman. You can’t go falling for some chick who’s going to stop you from coming out with me.”
“Dramatic much?” I rolled my eyes. “She’s not going to stop me from doing anything and I’m not falling for her. I just care about her and I don’t want to hurt her feelings.”
“Caring about chicks leads to falling for them,” he grumbled. “I can’t believe I’m going to have to find a new wingman. You suck.”
I laughed as I reached out and patted his shoulder. “Poor Drew. If it comes to that, I promise I’ll help you vet the candidates. Better?”
“No.” He shook my hand off before smirking at me. “On the plus side, if you and your billions are off the market, that might mean a lot more willing pussy for me. Too many women are obsessed with you, you know? As soon as they find out what I do or who I work for, it’s all Taydom, Taydom, Taydom.”
“You jealous, bro?” I quirked an eyebrow at him, trying my best to hold back a grin. “Because if so, you could work a little harder and make those billions for yourself.”
“No thanks. We’ve talked about that, remember? I’m not jealous. I’m simply pointing out a fact. If there is no chance they can get you, all those pretty girls hanging around me hoping to get to you might just decide to fuck me. It’s a win-win situation really.”
“I only have one problem with all that. I’m not off the market and I’m not going to be. Jesus. All I said was that I was starting to care for the girl. I’m not about to go down on one knee for her. You know how I feel about all that.”
He laughed and held out a fist for me to bump. “Hell yeah, I do. I just needed to be sure you haven’t changed your mind.”
“Definitely not.” Although that wasn’t completely true.
Over the last few days, I had often found myself wondering what it would be like to be with Elsie for real. When I walked into my empty house after a shitty day, I thought about what it might be like to find her waiting for me. When I woke up in the mornings, I played the memory of the one morning I had woken up to her beautiful face over and over again in my mind.
Somehow in almost all of the small, everyday moments, I found I had Elsie somewhere on the brain. Whether it made any logical sense for her to be there or not, I still found myself thinking about her.
The other morning, I’d walked into my office, and the first thing I did was imagine her sitting on my couch having a cup of coffee with me before going to class. Then I started imagining bending her over my desk and fucking her from behind, and well, then I’d had to forcibly shove her out of my head since I’d wanted to avoid walking into my morning meeting with a raging hard-on.
Elsie had only been in my office once, and yet it seemed like she haunted me there now, too. It was a fuckup of a situation and totally unlike me, but for some reason, I liked it. I liked thinking about her all the fucking time.
There was probably something very wrong with me but I didn’t even care.
None of these thoughts made their way out of my mouth, though. I was still figuring it out for myself and Andrew would freak the fuck out if I told him what was really going on in my head. Also, there was this overly possessive part of me that didn’t even want to share intimate thoughts about her.
Messed up? Absolutely.
We hadn’t even talked about being exclusive or at all about what was going on between us, yet I went crazy at the mere thought of talking too much about her with another man. At this point, if I was to see her with another guy, I was pretty sure I’d lose it.
Andrew’s voice drew me out of my thoughts. “Just don’t tell the girl anything. She’ll never know that you were using her to help your family. If you care about her, fine, but your family has to come first. I might not have all the details, but if they’re not doing well, you have to take care of them.”
“I know,” I agreed. “Despite the fact that they make it insanely difficult to take care of them, I know I have to. I just have to figure out how to do it.”
The other thing—which was something else Andrew didn’t need to know—was that it wasn’t only my family I wanted to take care of. I wanted to take care of Elsie as well, and I knew I could. I just had to make very sure that she didn’t end up seeing things from Andrew’s perspective instead of mine.
“You’ll figure it out,” Andrew said confidently. “You thrive on anything that’s insanely difficult, so I know you’ll come up with a plan. I just can’t wait to hear what it is.”
“Thanks, man. Neither can I.” I just wished another layer hadn’t been added to the plan I didn’t have. If Elsie felt like I’d used her or had been using her all along, she’d be really hurt.
The very last thing I wanted to do was hurt her. The worst part of it was that this plan I had yet to formulate had the power to do a lot of damage to the hearts of the only two women I really cared about.
Lucky fucking me.
Chapter 27
Elsie
As I sat up in bed, it felt like there was a hook behind my navel and whoever held the other side of it tugged as soon as I was upright. Nausea rolled through me, making me break out in a cold sweat as my mouth watered.
I groaned and folded myself into a ball, dragging in breath after breath to quell the feeling. It took a few minutes before it started subsiding, and a few more after that before it felt safe to move.
The clock on my nightstand glared at me with angry red numbers on the display. They were red every morning, considering that it was the color of the backlight, but they’d never felt quite so angry and judgmental before.
God, I must be coming down with something.
I didn’t have time to be sick. As those judging numbers just loved to remind me, I was already running late. I had to get to school or risk missing my first class.
After hauling myself out of bed and into the shower, I raced through my morning routine and made it out of the door just a few minutes later than usual. Thankfully, this seemed to be a sweet spot for traffic and I made it to campus just in time for my class.
Abnormal psychology was one of my favorite classes. It was one in which I seldom felt bored, but I just couldn’t seem to focus on what Dr. Martin was teaching that day.
Despite the fact that I’d gone to bed early every night of the week, I felt exhausted. My eyelids felt like they’d been lined with lead and my brain just wouldn’t hang onto thoughts.
“The first criterion of abnormality is the violation of social norms,” the professor was saying as that hook yanked the back of my navel again.
My hand flew to my mouth as I tried to keep myself from getting sick all over my desk. It didn’t feel like a false alarm, so I hastily grabbed my things and shot Dr. Martin an apologetic look before fleeing from the room.
Her brows furrowed on a frown, but she didn’t try to stop me. I hadn’t had much contact with her since classes started back up, but I’d had her for a couple of courses over the years and she knew I wasn’t one to bail in the middle of a lecture for nothing.
I dashed down the hall with my sneakers squeaking as I took the one corner separating me from the bathroom. Shoving the door open with my shoulder, I crashed into the first a
vailable stall and sank to my knees.
My satchel went tumbling to the floor, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. Urg. I’m feeling so shitty.
The latest bout of nausea passed eventually, but I didn’t go back to class. I didn’t want to take the chance of having to cause another scene if I had to leave abruptly, and if I was coming down with something, I didn’t want to spread it to others.
Between the classes I’d already be missing when we went to Illinois and the trip itself, I really hoped whatever I had was some kind of twenty-four-hour thing. Possibly even a twelve-hour thing, if I’m lucky.
I made my way out of the building, surprisingly feeling perfectly fine again all of a sudden. I decided to go to the health center just in case. There was definitely something up with me, and if I was contagious, I needed to know.
Our campus wasn’t a big one. The size of the health center reflected our relatively small student population. The quaint brick building was situated in the middle of a patch of trees that made it look a little like something out of a fairytale.
Weird, considering that it was a mini-hospital, but I’d asked the administrator about it once. He said it had been chosen partly because the environment it was in was already calm. Apparently, that helped patients with all kinds of ailments to remain calmer themselves.
I’d done a lot of sessions there as part of my program and I smiled as the small bell above the door tinkled when I walked inside. Jeanette, the same receptionist who had been there since I was an undergrad, widened her eyes in surprise when she looked up to see me.
“Hey, Elsie. I didn’t know you were scheduled for more sessions this semester. I thought we’d only be seeing you again next semester.” She smiled. “How are you?”
“I’m good. You?” I clutched the strap of my satchel as my palms grew sweaty. “I’m not here for a session actually. I’m feeling a little under the weather. Thought it was best to get checked out. I really can’t afford to get sick right now.”
Her hazel eyes softened in sympathy. “I hear you. There never does seem to be a good time for it, though. Have a seat. Someone should be with you soon.”
I nodded and motioned toward the stack of clipboards lying on the counter in front of her. I knew the required forms to be filled would already be clipped to them. Jeanette always seemed to be prepared to handle a stampede of new patients, even if it was more of a trickle on most days.
“Should I fill that in?”
She grinned. “That would be great. Thanks, honey. Let me go check in the back how long it’s going to take someone to get to you.”
“Thanks.” I grabbed a clipboard from the stack, took a seat facing the windows, and completed the form while I waited.
Jeanette was back a few minutes later. “April says she’ll be with you just as soon as she’s done.”
“Okay, great.” I watched people sauntering past the building and heard the bell jingle a few more times during the wait. The health center was constantly busy. The trickle of students never quite seemed to let up.
Thankfully, the staff was also efficient and the waiting times were never terrible. April called my name a little while later, flashing me a smile from where she stood in the doorway.
“Hey, Elsie. Come on through. I’ve set up exam room two for us. What’s up?” The fiery-haired doctor had become something of a friend to me and it was a relief to know I’d be getting checked out by someone I knew.
Her kind brown eyes tracked my movement as I got up and made my way to her. As she looked me up and down, her brows pulled together. “Are you okay? You look a little pale.”
“I feel pale,” I said, offering her a weak smile. “I’m okay. I’m just not feeling my best.”
“In that case, you’ve come to the right place.” She lifted her hands and placed one on either side of the stethoscope hanging around her neck. Her head dipped to the side. “Come on. Let’s get you checked out.”
A nurse I didn’t know waited in the exam room, smiling as we entered. “I heard we’re looking after one of our own today.”
“Not quite,” I said. “Just a student who’s spent some time here, is all.”
April motioned toward a bed in the center of the room and patted the mattress. “Hop on up, girl. Why don’t you tell me what’s been going on with you?”
The nurse moved behind me as I climbed onto the bed and faced April. I gave her a quick rundown of my symptoms and told her they’d only started this morning.
“Well,” she said, once I was done with my explanation. “It could be any number of things. There’s a stomach bug traveling around campus at the moment and a pretty bad flu doing the rounds, but we need to account for another possibility.”
“Like what?” I frowned. The expression on her face had gone from relaxed to concerned and I noticed her exchanging a glance with the nurse.
She rolled her lower lip into her mouth. “Have you been sexually active recently?”
My brows rose as my cheeks flushed. “Yeah, I, uh, I guess. Yes. Why?”
The corners of her mouth pressed in and she dragged in a deep breath. “We have to consider that you might be pregnant.”
I felt the blood that had just rushed to my cheeks leave my face as fast as it had shot up there. My fingers and toes grew cold and my mouth was suddenly drier than the Sahara Desert.
“But, I, uh, I’m on the pill.” My heartbeat sped up until it felt like the thing was trying to win a Nascar race. “I can’t be… you know.”
Sympathy softened her features as she lifted a shoulder. “Even if you take it exactly the way you should, it’s not infallible.”
Exactly the way you should. Her words echoed through my mind as I thought back over the last few months since my mother’s death. I’d been fairly consistent with taking my pill at the right time of the day, but I had skipped some days.
“Fuck,” I mumbled, a heavy sigh falling from my lips as I tried to wrap my head around the possibility. “What now?”
April’s soft hand closed over my forearm and she squeezed as she offered me a comforting smile. “Now we draw some blood and run some tests.”
I nodded, but it was like I was hearing her from underwater. I switched into autopilot mode after that, holding out my arm like a good little girl.
I barely felt the pinch when April inserted the needle, and a few seconds later, I couldn’t believe she was already done. “Anything else?”
She shook her head. “Nope. We’ll run this in the lab and let you know the results as soon as we do.”
“How long is that going to take?” I asked, my voice strangely monotone.
“A few days.” An apology flashed in her eyes. “With the stomach bug and the flu in the air, in addition to all the normal tests we run, the lab is slammed at the moment. There’s also a health drive this weekend, so we’ll be here, but we’ll be busy.”
“This weekend?” I blinked as I struggled to comprehend what she was telling me. “It’s only Wednesday.”
“I know, but there’s no way I can speed the results up. I guess you could go get an over-the-counter test if you’re worried, but we’re already running the blood test. It’s miles better than any test available at the drug store.” She laid a hand on my shoulder. “I’ll give you a call personally as soon as your results are in. You have my word. I wouldn’t make you wait until Monday if I get them earlier.”
“What do I do until then?” I asked, numbness spreading through me.
“Go home,” she said softly. “Get some rest for today. If you’re feeling up to going back to class tomorrow, do it. Don’t say anything to anybody until we know for sure. It might very well be one of the bugs going around campus.”
“Okay.” I felt my head bouncing up and down, but I didn’t remember wanting to nod. “Thanks, April. I’ll be waiting to hear from you.”
“I know. I promise I won’t make you wait a minute longer than necessary.” She gave my shoulder a squeeze, then waved and went off to do what it
was she did after delivering potentially life-altering news.
As for me, it was all I could do to put one foot in front of the other. My mind was racing through a flurry of thoughts, but I couldn’t grab onto any.
When I eventually made it back to my car, I took April’s advice and headed straight home. Once I got there, I shed my clothes, drew my curtains, and got into bed wearing my most comfortable pajamas. Whether it was disbelief or shock that sent me into complete shutdown mode, I didn’t know.
All I knew was when I woke up again, it was dark. I made my way to the kitchen, had some dry toast and a cup of tea, and went back to bed. I needed time to process, and just like I’d been after the last greatest shock of my life, I gave myself the time I needed.
Chapter 28
Taydom
The soft hum of the air conditioning was the only sound in my office as I tried to determine what else I needed to take with me. My desk was covered in stacks of paperwork, but a lot of what I’d had to get done from Illinois could be done on my laptop.
I’d already packed it up and had double-checked that I had soft copies of all the documents I needed. Andie, my assistant, had also assembled a few thin files I had to take and had placed them neatly into my laptop bag.
Dragging my hands through my hair as I narrowed my eyes at what remained on my desk, I released a slow breath and nodded. That was it.
The only thing I was still missing was a girl to take with me. Elsie hadn’t given me an answer, but we’d been texting, and she’d alluded to having a good surprise for me. I was crossing my fingers that it meant she’d heard back from that last class she’d been waiting on and that we were all clear.
Doubt ate away at the back of my mind, though. There had been complete radio silence from her since yesterday morning. She hadn’t returned my texts and hadn’t taken my call when I tried that.
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