‘Are you happy?’ he demanded, drawing her into his arms.
She could never express how she felt. There was such joy in the air, such exuberance and laughter, and for every nanosecond left to her she was going to live this out to the full. While he was kissing her Rigo removed her jacket and tossed it away. ‘Remind me to make a bonfire for that old suit,’ he said, raising his head to look into her eyes, and while she was laughing her skirt followed the same trajectory. All that remained now between Rigo and her scars were her underwear and a blouse. The last bubble was about to be burst. She turned her face away. It was wrong to allow this. She would not cause him any more pain.
He searched for her lips with his.
She pushed him away. His eyes flickered and changed. She’d hurt him. There was no way not to hurt him. It broke her heart to do this, but it would destroy them both if she let him see her scars. Rigo would turn away from her in disgust, believing he’d been betrayed again.
But she should have known he wouldn’t be so easily dissuaded. She let him kiss her one last time and felt her heart soar. When he released her she stared at him to imprint every atom of his features on her mind. Reaching up, she wove her fingers into his thick black hair, loving the way it sprang, glossy and strong, beneath her palm. She needed that sensation branded on her mind to sustain her in a future without him. In Katie’s world love was a cause for concern. Whatever she felt for Rigo must be rigorously controlled so it never reached past the bedroom door.
Yes, and look where she was now...
Touching his fingers to her chin, Rigo made her look at him. ‘What are you frightened of, Katie?’
Instead of answering, she traced the line of his beloved face with her fingertips until he captured her hands and kissed each fingertip in turn. Her skin was still prickling from contact with Rigo’s sharp black stubble. Tears welled in her eyes as the thought, sharp and dark, like the end of this romance, rose in her mind; there could be no happy ending.
‘So, signorina,’ he murmured against her lips, ‘have you no answer for me? Will you not tell me what is wrong, so I can help you?’
What is wrong? I love you with all my heart, she thought, and always will. My love for you fills every part of me with happiness... But she would never speak of this to Rigo. He was so confident and so happy. He was still at the top of the mountain, while she was rapidly slithering down it—though his sexy, slumberous eyes had begun to gain an edge of suspicion. In that brief moment she saw the same vulnerability everyone felt when they had bared their soul to another. And right on cue her scars stung a reminder of why this love for Rigo must go no further.
She pulled away. He dragged her close, kissing her until her soul was as bare as his. He tasted her tears and pulled back. ‘What aren’t you telling me? Is there someone else?’
‘No!’ she exclaimed; the idea was abhorrent to her. But Rigo’s voice had turned cold and everything had changed. Their brief idyll was over.
‘Katie?’
Someone else? No. Something else.
‘I knew it.’ He thrust her away. ‘I can see it in your eyes.’
Could he? Could he see the ridged skin—the ugly, ruined skin? Those foul red shiny scars stood between them as surely as another person—
‘Why don’t you just admit it?’ He launched himself from the bed.
Because she had wanted this too much.
But she had forgotten Rigo was not the tame, civilised man he appeared to the wider world, but a man who had survived life on the streets, fighting for every piece of bread he put in his mouth. Rigo had never stopped fighting, whether for his foundation or for his company and employees, or anyone else he believed needed someone to champion them, and he wasn’t about to lose this fight. Whirling round, he seized her wrists and tumbled her back onto the pillows. Holding her firmly in place, he cursed viciously in her face. ‘Not again! Do you understand me, Katie? Tell me the truth. Tell me why you have such a problem with commitment.’
‘There’s no one else—’
‘And I should believe you?’
But his grip had loosened fractionally.
‘I swear, Rigo—there’s only you.’
He let her go and sank down on the bed with his head in his hands.
‘You’re my world,’ she said. ‘You fill my mind every waking moment and my dreams are full of you when I’m asleep—’
‘Then I don’t understand,’ he said, looking up. ‘What’s standing between us? Tell me, Katie. I have to know. Maybe I can help you.’
This big, strong, powerful man, this man who was so confident he could make everything right for her if she only wanted it badly enough. But her voice would never come back and her scars would never go away. Could she burden him with that? Shaking her head, she clung to the edges of her blouse.
Rigo’s gaze followed her movement. ‘Oh, Katie,’ he murmured and, gently disentangling her hands, he brought them to his lips. Letting her go at last, he stood in front of her, stripping off his clothes. When he was completely naked he lay on the bed and drew her into his arms. ‘Why couldn’t you tell me the truth? Do you think my feelings for you are so fragile?’
As understanding flooded her brain shame suffused her. ‘It’s not my breasts.’
‘What, then?’ He went still.
Moments passed and then Rigo drew her to him. ‘You have to tell me, Katie. You can’t live like this.’
He was right. Without him she was only half-alive.
‘I’m going to take your blouse off.’ He started unfastening it. He shared his courage, staring into her eyes. He lifted her up into a place he inhabited, a place where problems were dealt with and not pushed aside. He slid the blouse from her shoulders and embraced her back. His hands explored and his expression never wavered. ‘Come to me, cara,’ he said, drawing her closer. ‘Trust me...’
And so at last she lay with her face pressed into the pillows while he looked at her back. Hot shame coursed through her. She felt dirty and ugly. She was repulsive. That was how she’d felt when she’d left the hospital and taken a long, hard look at herself in the mirror. Squeezing her eyes shut now, she pictured Rigo recoiling in horror. How could he not? He only had to measure his perfection against her flaws to know jokes didn’t come this bad.
But she waited in vain for his exclamation of disgust, and felt the bed yield as he lay down at her side. And then, incredibly, she felt him kiss her back...all down the length of the scars. And when he’d finished, he said softly, ‘Tell me—how do you think this changes you?’
‘Isn’t it obvious?’ she mumbled, her voice muffled by the pillows.
‘Not to me. Is this what you were hiding from me?’
She turned her head to look at him.
‘I can’t believe it,’ Rigo murmured. ‘I can’t believe you would think me so shallow—’
‘I don’t. I think you’re perfect—so perfect, how can you not be disgusted?’
‘By you holding out on me, perhaps that might disgust me, but by these? You said you’d trained as an opera singer when we were at Gino’s, and the letter of introduction sent to me by your firm mentioned it, but it said nothing about a fire—’
‘I didn’t put it on my CV. I didn’t think it relevant to my new life.’
‘So you shut it out and tried to forget you were in a fire that left you badly scarred and stole your voice away? And every day you were reminded of what you’d lost each time you spoke or when you took your clothes off.’
‘It’s not so bad—’
‘Not so bad? You lost the future you’d planned. That’s big—huge, Katie. Who did you confide in? No one!’ he exclaimed when she remained silent. ‘And you’ve been hiding your feelings ever since?’
‘I had to hide my scars from you—’
‘Because you thought I would
throw up my hands in alarm?’
‘Because I thought they would sicken you. I thought if you saw them they would take any feelings you might have for me and turn them sour and ugly.’
‘So how do you feel now when I tell you that I love you?’
‘You—’
‘Sì, ti amo, Katie. I will always love you. I can’t imagine life without you. You’re my life now.’
He stopped her saying anything with a kiss so deep and tender, she felt cherished and knew the nightmare that had mastered her for so long didn’t exist in Rigo’s mind. Bottling things up, just as he had said, had allowed the consequences of the fire to ferment and expand in her imagination until they ruled her life. And now he was kissing her in a way that sealed the lid on those insecurities. There was no need for words; this was the ultimate reassurance.
Rigo made love to her all night and they woke in the morning with their limbs entwined, when he made love to her again while she was still half-asleep. To wake and be loved was the miracle she had always dreamed of, only it was so much better in reality. ‘I love you, Rigo.’ She said this, kneeling in front of him, naked. ‘You’ve made me strong.’
‘You’ve always been strong,’ Rigo argued. Taking hold of her hands, he drew her to him. ‘You just needed reminding how strong you are. If you weren’t strong you wouldn’t have chosen such a challenging path through life—first music, and now me.’
She laughed. How could she not? ‘I love you so much,’ she whispered, staring into his eyes.
‘You’re sure?’
‘You made it possible for me to love.’
‘So now the world is your oyster?’ he teased in his sexy drawl.
‘My world is you—’
‘Brava,’ he murmured with one of his killer smiles. Lowering her onto the bank of pillows beside him, he added, ‘Just remember, I love every part of you—not just this leg, or that finger, or these ears. I love the whole Katie.’
And the fierce pledge in his eyes said that as far as Rigo was concerned her scars did not exist. ‘I love every part of you that goes to make you the woman I love now and always.’
And to prove it he moved down the bed.
As she cried out with pleasure he took her again, and this time when they were one her heart sang.
* * *
They had a leisurely breakfast in bed, planning the future. They had already discussed the possibility of Katie seeing a plastic surgeon, should she want to, but for some reason the one thing that had obsessed her since the fire seemed unimportant to her now. Rigo had made it so. He had taken her internal compass and pointed it towards the future—a future they would enjoy together. ‘But we will have to leave the room sometime,’ she pointed out when Rigo’s eyes darkened in a way she recognised.
‘But not yet,’ he insisted, drawing her down beside him.
‘No, not yet,’ she agreed.
And when he finally released her, she admitted, ‘I fell in love with you the first hair-raising moment we met.’
‘I was a brute.’
‘You were challenging.’
‘And you were very patient with me.’
‘And just look at my reward...’
‘Ah, there is that.’
Modest to the last, Katie thought, recognising the wicked smile.
‘And, Katie—’
‘Yes?’ she whispered as Rigo drew her beneath him.
‘Have you never considered singing again?’
‘Now?’
‘Later, perhaps,’ he suggested, easing into her. ‘But just think how the public would love your sexy, breathy voice. If I can fall in love with that voice over the phone—’
‘But that’s you...’
‘Are you daring to suggest there’s something wrong with my judgement?’
He was making it very hard to think at all. ‘If I did that I would have to question your love for me,’ she managed on a shaky breath.
‘And you won’t, so have some confidence, Katie. There is more than one popular style of music. You can still sing in tune, can’t you?’
She was supposed to answer while he was making every part of her sing? ‘Well, yes, but I can’t sing as I used to—’ She gasped as he moved up a gear.
‘Your new public wouldn’t want you to—’
‘My? Oh...’ She conceded defeat. No thought possible.
‘Have you forgotten that one of my passions is making dreams come true? And I have a keen nose for business.’
She could only groan her agreement.
‘You’re going to record a track—an album—’ he picked up pace ‘—and who knows? I might even make some money out of you.’
‘Rigo, you’re impossible,’ she shrieked, recognising his game now. Rigo distracted himself while he concentrated on her pleasure.
‘I try my very best,’ he admitted, still moving as she quietened.
She had no doubt that he would.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
SUMMER CAME AND went in a flurry of love and activity. It was almost Christmas before Katie knew it. The renovations to the palazzo were well under way, and she was fully involved in Carlo’s Kids’ Club. She had started this sunny December day in the kitchen at the Palazzo Farnese, where she was helping to prepare a special lunch for Antonia, who was travelling to see them on one of her regular visits from Rome. Katie was closer than ever to Antonia, having persuaded Rigo that, if she wanted to, his sister must play a full part in his scheme. She had pointed out that Antonia wasn’t too young to face up to life and that, if Rigo insisted on shielding his little sister and sent her shopping all the time, Antonia would never grow up. Antonia had embraced this idea with the enthusiasm only Antonia could, and even Rigo had admitted then his sister had been brushed aside for far too long, both by his father and her mother, and then by him. Antonia had seized the opportunity to prove herself and had more than repaid Katie’s faith in her, and now they were not just friends but soon to be sisters—
‘Hey, tesoro.’
Katie’s heart bounced with happiness as Rigo walked into the room. She would never lose the sense of excitement she felt each time she saw him.
Walking up to her, he swung her round to face the staff and, leaning his disreputable stubble-shaded chin on the top of the shiny tumble of hair she always wore down now, he announced, ‘I have a surprise for you, tesoro—’
‘Another surprise?’ Katie exclaimed.
There had been nothing but surprises from Rigo since the day she moved in—not just to the palazzo, or the penthouse, but into Rigo’s life. The wardrobe of clothes she had initially refused had miraculously appeared in her dressing room. And when she had asked him where they came from, he said, ‘They must have been brought by fairies.’ And when she finally stopped laughing, he admitted that he had given most of her measurements to the designers, and that her short audience with them when she first arrived had been a ruse.
‘How did you do that?’ she demanded.
‘I have a good eye,’ he admitted.
‘Two good eyes,’ she remembered telling him with a scolding look. Goodness knew where Rigo gained that sort of experience—and, frankly, she didn’t want to know. ‘You mentioned a surprise?’ she reminded him now.
‘Just a little something,’ he said, delving into the pocket of his jeans. ‘It’s something for the wedding. See what you think. I got the colour scheme right, didn’t I? White and ivory with a garnish of red roses...?’
Their wedding... She could hardly believe it. Two more days and they would be married at the cathedral in Farnese. ‘You know you did,’ she rebuked him playfully, wondering what could be in the beautifully wrapped box, with its iridescent ivory wrapping paper and rose-red ribbon.
‘Well, open it,’ Rigo prompted.
It must be a lacy garter, Katie thought, ripping the paper in her excitement. As the ribbon fluttered to the ground, Rigo caught it and handed it to her. ‘Open the box,’ he said.
She did so and gasped.
Everyone gasped.
Rigo affected a frown. ‘Is blue-white straying too far from your original scheme?’
A huge blue-white diamond solitaire winked at her from its velvet nest.
Katie collected herself. ‘Blue-white,’ she said, lips pressing down as she pretended to think about it. ‘I think it will tone quite nicely.’ She turned to him, a smile blooming on her face.
‘Is it big enough?’ Rigo demanded.
Did Rigo ever do small? ‘It’s absolutely perfect,’ she breathed, ‘but you really didn’t have to—’
‘But I wanted to.’
‘Then that’s different.’
‘Let me put it on your finger.’
He stared deep into her eyes as he did so, and all the staff gave them a round of applause.
‘So you finally did it!’
Everyone turned as Antonia bounded into the room. A haze of vanilla and raspberry perfume accompanied her. Antonia’s first hug was for Katie. ‘My new sister!’ she exclaimed. ‘At least, you will be in two days’ time.’ She turned to Rigo. ‘You took long enough,’ she accused him. ‘I thought you would never get round to asking Katie to marry you.’
‘A week is too long?’ He exchanged a glance with Katie.
‘In my world it’s forever!’ Antonia exclaimed with a sigh. ‘And now it’s almost four months later, so you have no excuse—there’s only me to sort out now—’
‘Some day your prince will come,’ Rigo interrupted, handing Antonia another box.
Taming the Last AcostaItalian Boss, Proud Miss Prim Page 33
