by Debra Cowan
Her heart dropped to her knees even as she berated herself.
Gideon wasn’t coming back.
She pasted a smile on her face and went to meet the young man. “Hi, Coy.”
“Miss Ivy.” He palmed off his hat.
“What can I do for you?”
“I brought something for you.” He met her at the fence and gave her a folded piece of paper.
A heavy, official-looking document. Dread began to pound inside her. With shaking hands, she unfolded the page. It was a claim deed, reassigning Gideon’s half of the farm to her.
“Mr. Black wanted me to make sure you got this. He said it’s official.”
The sight of his signature next to Titus Rowland’s affirmed that. A knot lodged in her chest. Fighting tears, she tried to thank Coy, but the words simply wouldn’t come.
She pasted on a smile. “There are biscuits left from breakfast if you’d like some.”
“That sounds good.”
“Let me get them.” She started up the walk to the porch.
“Miss Ivy, should I just bed down in the barn?”
She turned. “Why would you do that?”
“Mr. Black wants me to help you around the farm.”
The news made her throat ache. She couldn’t decide if she was grateful or resentful. He was gone, so why was he taking care of her?
“I can’t afford to pay you long-term, Coy.”
“There’s no need. Mr. Black already took care of it. I’m supposed to stay until you find someone permanent. After that, my wage goes to the new farmhand. Or two if you need. He said he wouldn’t leave you in a bind.”
Ivy wanted to scream, to be indignant, but she couldn’t muster up the emotion. Until the moment she’d seen the deed, she hadn’t really believed he would go. But he had. He’d given up his claim and left because she’d asked.
No, she harshly corrected, he’d gone because she had practically forced him.
Ivy watched as her young farmhand went to the barn. When Gideon had arrived, he’d been just as wary, just as guarded as she was. Because of Eleanor.
After that woman’s horrible betrayal, it was surprising that he would ever open up to another woman. But he had. He had made a conscious choice to trust Ivy anyway. And he’d fallen in love with her, despite her glaring faults.
If he was willing to take the chance, she should be, too.
Instead, she’d run him off and maybe ruined everything between them. No other man had ever made her look so honestly at herself. Had ever known her the way Gideon did. And he had wanted her anyway. Could she bare her soul to him the way he’d done for her? Take a chance on him the way he had taken a chance on her?
She knew it was the only way she could have him.
It took her a week to get everything settled. A week in which she doubted herself plenty. And him, too, if she were honest. But she was going after him. She only hoped it wasn’t too late.
* * *
Ivy’s stomach was in knots the entire two-day ride, and the tension didn’t ease when she rode onto Diamond J land just after noon on Wednesday.
It had been nine days since she’d seen her husband. Her nerves were raw with a mix of dread and anticipation. She wondered if he was working close by. Or in the pasture herding pregnant cows up to the pen.
She reined up outside the barn and dismounted, hit with nostalgia as she looked around. The sturdy corrals, the well-kept yard around the house, the weathered gray barn all looked the same. Familiar. And just outside the kitchen was the massive oak tree where she and Smith had hung a swing as children. They’d spent hours out there.
She wished she had time to wash up, but she wanted to find Gideon as quickly as possible. Removing her hat, she hung it on the saddle horn, then smoothed her hair as best she could. Her own mare wasn’t fit to ride yet, so she’d brought another from her stock.
Just as she started to walk toward the house to say hello to her parents and find out where her husband was, she heard people talking in the barn.
Her brother’s voice. And his wife’s.
Hands clammy, Ivy wiped them down the front of her trousers. A mottled ball of fur streaked toward her, and before she had time to react, Thunder jumped at her then pawed at her feet, begging for a scratch. The dog wiggled like a worm on a hook, her tail thumping, her body vibrating with excitement.
Ivy wished Gideon would greet her with even a speck of this much enthusiasm.
Smiling, she approached the barn’s wide-open double doors as the pup ran around her in circles.
“You know why,” came a deep masculine voice.
Gideon. Ivy froze.
“If I stay, I’ll never get over her.”
Her heart leaped. Maybe she hadn’t ruined everything. The memory of the first time she’d met him flooded back. It had been in this barn, the night of her mother’s Christmas party. She’d thought he was a trespasser and held him at gunpoint until Smith set her straight.
That party had also served to welcome Smith home. For two long years, they’d believed he was dead, and then last Christmas, he’d appeared. He’d been in prison, convicted of a crime he didn’t commit, and that was where he’d met Gideon.
“You don’t have to go,” her brother said to his friend.
Gideon was leaving?
“Once I get settled, I’ll send word.”
Ivy’s heart dropped to her knees. He was moving on.
“I wish you’d stay a little longer,” Smith coaxed. “Just because my sister doesn’t know what she has in you doesn’t mean I don’t.”
“Smith’s right,” Caroline said. “You’re a good friend to both of us, Gideon.”
Ivy knew Smith considered her husband as close as a brother.
“Can’t we change your mind?” Ivy’s sister-in-law pleaded.
“It’s best this way,” he said quietly.
If her brother couldn’t convince the man to stay, was there any way Ivy could?
She had to try.
She stepped into the doorway, her eyes slowly adjusting to the dimmer light of the barn. Smith and Caroline were facing away from her. Just beyond them, Gideon tied his bedroll behind his saddle then angled back toward her brother. His gaze locked on her, and he froze.
Her heart kicked hard. She was too far away to read whether it was welcome or bitterness in his eyes. When his face closed against her, she had her answer.
Just seeing him filled a hole inside her. Dressed in a white shirt that stretched across his broad shoulders and faded denims that sleeked down his muscular legs, she thought she could happily look at him forever.
Smith and Caroline followed Gideon’s gaze, surprise widening their eyes when they saw her.
Her brother reached her first, grabbing her in a bear hug then moving out of the way so his blonde wife could hug her, too.
He was hardly limping. The surgery to reset the several broken bones he’d suffered in prison had been successful.
After a look back at Gideon, Smith lowered his voice. “I hope you’re here for the reason I think you are.”
“I am.” She swallowed past the lump in her throat. “Am I too late?”
Sympathy flickered in his dark eyes. “You’ve got some convincin’ to do.”
She nodded. He bussed her on the cheek and Caroline did, too. Smith scooped up Thunder on his way out.
As her family left, Ivy walked inside, stopping yards away from Gideon. His remoteness was palpable, pushing at her like heat from a fire.
Eyes narrowed, his gaze flicked over her. Picking up his gelding’s reins, he walked toward her. Her nerves jumped. He was indeed packed to leave, she saw.
Uncertainty dried her mouth. He had every right to ignore her, rant at her. “Hi,” she said softly when he
reached her.
His jaw was anvil-hard, his voice flat. “Is there something you need me to sign?”
When she looked blankly at him, he clarified, “For the divorce.”
“No.” Grief pricked at her. “No, nothing like that.”
“When you do, Smith will know how to get it to me.” He moved past her.
“Don’t go yet. I want to talk to you.”
His shoulders went rigid. “I can’t think of one reason why. Everything’s been said.”
Not that I love you and want to be with you! She walked around to stand in front of him. “Can’t you give me just a few minutes?”
“I heard it all the first time,” he said with a sense of finality that had panic fluttering.
“No, you didn’t.”
“I really need to get going. Can’t lose much more daylight.”
She couldn’t blame him for wanting to hightail it away from her. “There are things I need to say.”
“If this is about half of the farm, you can forget it.”
“It’s not.”
He finally looked at her, and the bleakness in his eyes rattled her. “I’m not much of a mind to listen.”
Leading his horse, he stepped around her and headed for the open doors.
She couldn’t let him leave. She rushed around to block his path. Pure reflex had her pulling her gun from her trouser pocket.
“Well, this is familiar,” he drawled.
Pushing back his hat, he made to go past her.
She leveled her weapon at him.
He practically rolled his eyes. “Woman, put that gun away. We both know you aren’t going to shoot me.”
No, she wouldn’t, but she didn’t know any other way to get him to stop. “You’re going to listen to what I have to say.”
There was a dark, dangerous look on his face, but she didn’t waver. Just kept her gun aimed at him.
“Please,” she added softly.
There was hurt in his eyes. And anger. And something she thought, hoped, was longing.
Where to start? “I’m sorry. For so many things, but especially for sending you away. For not trying. For not believing.”
A muscle flexed in his jaw. He said nothing.
“You were right about everything you said.” She shifted toward him, and he stepped back. She felt it like a slap. Who knew how much time he would give her? “After what Eleanor did to you, I realized you’re taking a chance on me. All you asked was that I take a chance on you, too. And I want to.”
“I’m not partial to the idea of having a wife who’s waiting for a chance to escape our marriage.”
She couldn’t blame him for thinking that. How could she get through to him? “When you deeded the farm back to me, I couldn’t believe it. I really thought you would stay for the land. You’d wanted it for so long.”
His mouth tightened.
“You gave up everything you’d ever desired because I couldn’t admit what you mean to me.” She took a deep breath, moving closer. Close enough to draw in his familiar masculine scent. “That I want you to be my husband.”
“For how long?” he asked fiercely.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, are you going to change your mind again?”
“No.” There was still wariness in his eyes, doubt. How could she convince him? “I sold the farm.”
His jaw dropped. “What!”
“To Hal Davis.”
There was the merest spark of joy in his eyes. For the first time since arriving, she felt hope.
His expression dumbfounded, he shook his head. “Why would you do that?”
She repeated what he’d said to her the day he left. “If I don’t have you, I don’t want it.”
He studied her for so long that she felt each second like a sting to her skin. She wanted to touch him, but she kept her hands to herself.
Tension knotted her shoulders. “That’s why it took me so long to get here. My things are coming later.”
“Where are you planning to live?”
“With you.”
His eyes flared hotly, yet she still sensed a reserve in him. “Why do you want to stay married?”
She looked blankly at him.
“Why?” he demanded impatiently, finally dropping the reins and coming to her. “Because that’s what I want?”
“No.” Her lips curved as realization spread through her. “I want to stay married because I love you and I want to spend my life with you.”
A muscle twitched in his jaw. As his gaze searched hers, he said gruffly, “Prove it.”
“How?” She went to him, wanting to put her arms around him. Feel his arms around her. “I’ll do whatever you want.”
“Marry me. For real, this time.”
Her chest was about to burst. Warmed by the smile in his eyes, she laid a hand on his chest. “We are married for real.”
“I want a ceremony in front of people. In front of your family so everybody knows.”
“All right. Yes!”
“Good!” Smith hollered from outside. Caroline’s soft laugh followed. Thunder barked.
Ivy wanted Gideon to kiss her now. She threw herself at him, but he stopped her with a hand on her shoulder.
With his other hand, now unbandaged and the stitches gone, he plucked the pistol away from her and carefully set it on the ground. “You don’t have to hold me at gunpoint anymore. I’m doing exactly what you want.”
“Then kiss me, husband.”
His mouth covered hers, his hands coming up to gently frame her face. When he lifted his head, she gripped his shirt with both hands, her knees weak.
He kissed her again, chuckling.
She slid her arms around his neck. “What’s funny?”
“You’re going to listen to what I have to say,” he imitated in a low voice. “Please.”
He grinned and pulled her tight into him. “It’s not much of a threat when you say please.”
“I was willing to do or say whatever I had to in order to get you to listen.”
Moving his lips to her ear, he murmured, “I can’t say no to you when you’re wearin’ those britches.”
Her heart actually hurt with joy. How had she ever thought she could send him away? “Tell me again,” she whispered.
His blue eyes darkened. “I love you.”
“I’m going to need to hear that at least once a day.”
“I wouldn’t mind hearing it a time or two myself, Mrs. Black.”
“I love you. I love you. I love you.”
And she meant it with every part of herself.
* * * * *
ISBN: 978 1 472 04367 2
THE COWBOY’S RELUCTANT BRIDE
© 2014 Debra Cowan
Published in Great Britain 2014
by Mills & Boon, an imprint of Harlequin (UK) Limited
Eton House, 18-24 Paradise Road, Richmond, Surrey TW9 1SR
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