by Elissa Daye
Only one man had attracted her attention, and she wasn’t even sure he was on the same radar. Hunter. The handsome Guardian whose face seemed to haunt her at night. Lyssa couldn’t seem to get him out of her head. If he hadn’t become such an easy fixture in their lives, ignoring her feelings would have been easier. These days, she bumped into him everywhere she turned. Lyssa could not believe that she had missed his face on campus before. She may have seen him around a few times, but it was certainly easier to notice him now. Her eyes were wide open. Jackson continued to give her grief about Hunter, which made her even more uncomfortable with her thoughts. He meant well, she knew he did, but sometimes she wanted to tell him to back off. Not that those words would make a difference. Jackson simply wanted her to be happy.
Today was a slower day for a change. Lyssa planned to check out a new store in the area. For some reason, she was drawn to it. She turned to Jackson, who was studying at the kitchen table next to her. “A new thrift store just opened. I thought about checking it out. Do you want to come with me?”
“I suppose it would be better than sitting around here.”
“Hey, you could still be stuck in the dorm. At least our apartment doesn’t smell like stinky armpits.”
Jackson crinkled his nose. “Well, that is certainly one upgrade we can thank the Watch Tower for. Rent free apartment living away from campus.”
“It’s nice not to have to worry about these things. The scholarships to our school help too. With all this magic and know how, we’ll be set for life.”
The doorbell rang, and Jackson walked over to answer it. When he peered in the eyehole, he turned back to Lyssa. “It’s your lover boy.”
“What?” Lyssa rushed over to the door and gasped. What was Hunter doing there? Not that she minded. They had all been spending more time together on campus lately, but he had never come to their apartment before. Her thoughts raced, and her heart beat extra in her chest. Why would he be here? Dare she hope he was there for her? No, she didn’t. He must be there on business. Why else could he be standing outside their door? Hunter was a decent human being, something she had not quite expected for someone so beautiful.
She hated to be judgmental because she certainly knew how it felt to be judged, but if she was honest with herself, Lyssa knew she was making assumptions based on his looks. The years of bullying, the pressures of being different from everyone else around her, were never buried deep enough in her consciousness. A flash entered her mind with the image of a girl who stood on the wall unnoticed, while all the pretty people walked past her with their perfect worlds intact. Lyssa was the girl who stayed still and quiet, holding her breath, hoping that people passing would not have a chance to see the old hand-me-down clothes and the ill-fitting shoes. There had been a target painted on her head, and it had always seemed to be deer season. High school had been a disaster waiting to happen for her. Dealing with all of this at school had been hard enough, but then she had to return home, to a place where things happened to her that had been so much more threatening than these shadow people ever could be.
Lyssa had spent a lifetime dodging the labels that other people had put on her, so she did feel guilt when she compared Hunter to a fancy bauble. He was just so shiny, but she reminded herself that he was unexpectedly nice to her and that sometimes you had to look past what you saw to understand the person beneath. Hunter genuinely seemed to care about her well-being and making sure that she adjusted well to her dual-life as an everyday college student and a Guardian of the Watch Tower. This made him all the more attractive to her.
“Are you two going to answer the door or not?” Clearly, he was amused.
“Sorry. One moment.” Lyssa unbolted the door and opened it. “Come in.”
“Welcome to our humble abode,” offered Jackson. He swept his arm over his stomach as he bowed before him.
“I see you got the standard issue apartment too.” A big grin filled Hunter’s face.
“Yep. Boring. I’m going to paint the walls deep purple and blue here soon.”
“You could requisition for that…unless you know the spell for it.” Hunter gestured to the walls.
“I’m afraid we’re a little short stacked on glamour spells at the moment. I’m sure Jackson can find the right spell in one of his books, though. What brings you here, Hunter? Not that you’re not welcome, of course.”
“To be honest, I was bored. I needed some fresh air and a friendly face or two.” If he caught her uneasiness, he didn’t let on.
“Lyssa was just about to head out to the new thrift store. I bet she’d love some company.”
Traitor. Lyssa narrowed her eyes on Jackson and felt her big toe curl in her shoe, the one safe gesture of shyness she had; as long as her shoes were on, it was not a sign of weakness, for no one could see it. “Uh, yeah. You’re welcome to come with me if you like.”
“The new one on Center Street?”
“I believe that’s the one, yes. Did you want to go?” Lyssa fidgeted with her fingers for a moment, then forced herself to put them behind her back. Why did it feel like she was asking him out on a date? They were simply going on a walk.
“Sure.”
“Are you coming, Jackson?” Lyssa grabbed her purse and jacket.
“Sorry. Have things to do. Have fun, kiddos.” Jackson almost bolted from the room, and Lyssa desperately wanted to call him back. She was usually more confident around people, but Hunter made her nervous, and while he was a handsome man, she knew there was something else to it, something she had not quite been able to put her finger on yet.
“Shall we?”
“After you.” Lyssa followed Hunter out the door.
The walk to the thrift store was short and unusually quiet, but Lyssa was thankful for the silence, for the way her heart beat rapidly in her chest, she was sure to make a fool of herself if she opened her mouth. Hunter made her whole body flutter whenever he was around her, and she was not quite sure how to handle it. He was not the typical man she was interested in…not that she had a type per se, but it typically was someone less noticeable to the female population, the trustworthy type who, while still attractive, would be safe enough for her not to fall completely in love with. Falling for the wrong man could be devastating, and she refused to do it.
When they made it to the thrift store, Hunter opened the door and held it for her to enter. “Ladies first.”
Her cheeks flushed hot against the cool burst of air escaping through the doorway. “Thank you.”
“I’m going to check out the books.” Hunter gestured to the wall. “I like to find vintage classics.”
“Go right ahead. I’m going to look over here first.” Lyssa found her way over to the glass case on the other side of the room. She peered inside and was eyeing a necklace when the saleslady came over. She had a small gold locket in her hand that she was about to put inside the case.
“Can I see that?” Something about the locket caught her eye, and Lyssa had to figure out why.
“Of course!” The tiny brunette handed over the locket and smiled at her.
The heart-shaped locket was old and worn. Two faces were peering back at her when she opened the clasp. Small flashes of light entered her mind, images from another life. A man and a woman deeply in love, a romance that had seemed timeless, but had ended tragically. Pain filled her very soul until small droplets pooled at the corners of her eyes. Lyssa blinked them away and shook her head.
Lyssa looked inside the locket again and touched the faded photos inside it. The two faces were older, but the woman looked very similar to what Lyssa looked like in this lifetime. Perhaps the nose or an ear was off just a little, but it was eerily close. And the man was familiar too…Hunter. Almost every part of his face was the same, except for the dimple in the middle of his chin. Lyssa now understood why his presence had seemed so second nature to her. Lyssa believed in past
lives and had recovered several of them through past life regression therapy with Lana. If she were right, this was a sign that they were connected in the past.
“Lyssa? Are you okay?” Hunter put a hand on her shoulder.
She closed her eyes and shook her head to chase away the memories tied to the necklace in her hand. Closing the locket quickly, she closed her fingers around it. “Sorry. That was weird.”
Hunter’s eyes touched on the locket in her hand. “Can I see that?”
The demand was one that Lyssa was not prepared to follow. “Why?”
“Just give it here, Lyssa.” Hunter looked inside, and the same familiar glow filled his eyes. He closed the locket and looked at Lyssa. His blue eyes met hers, and at that moment, they both seemed to know what the universe was telling them. They had known each other many lifetimes ago. Hunter grabbed her hand and walked her over to the counter. “We’ll take this.”
“I can get it,” Lyssa interrupted him. She yanked it from his hands and put it on the counter to check out. Her chin jutted out, defiantly against the protest that never came. When she had finished paying, they walked out of the store in an uneasy silence.
“We need to go somewhere to talk.”
“About?” Lyssa refused to look at him.
“A lot of things.” Hunter reached for her hand, and his eyes pleaded for her to grab onto him. Lyssa gave an exasperated sigh and grabbed onto his hand. Within moments, they were speeding through the air.
Chapter 9
When they finished moving through time and space, Lyssa found they were sitting in a small garden at a place she did not recognize. While she had never been there before, it felt safe. She let go of his hand and put a few steps between them. Distance would help her lock away the insecurity that was rearing its ugly head right now.
“Come here.”
He reached over and tried to retake her hand. Lyssa tried desperately to retract it, but he was quicker than she was. His fingers splayed over hers, and she felt the warm, comfortable feeling start to rush back into her, the same feeling she’d felt when she picked up the locket. There was something in the energy he sent that created a sad echo between them, like a trace of a long lost loved one who had suddenly returned. She looked up at his face in confusion, while the emotions racing through her heart left her perplexed.
Hunter raised his hand and brought it to her face, but she could not stand the closeness any longer. “What are you doing?” Lyssa pushed away from him. “I don’t like to be touched. Please don’t.”
“You’ve been hurt.”
“I’m not hurt, I’m broken.” She crossed her arms around her and turned her back to him. What was he doing? Why did he have to be so close to her? Being in this moment with him right now, with his eyes piercing her to the core, it was almost more than she could handle. Lyssa couldn’t tell if he was coming on to her or if he pitied her.
Lyssa heard him swear softly. She did not turn to see him walk closer to her; instead, she tried to shut out the sound of the blood pumping loudly in her ears. Closing her eyes, she grappled with the ugliness that she had locked away, but she knew it was useless. The memories were going to hit her again, a dark arm reaching across, trying to break her. A muffled cry that she had tried so many times to keep inside her mouth every time he entered the room was stuffed in the back of her throat like an old mothball. She shook her head with her eyes still closed, and almost jumped when she felt Hunter’s hand on her shoulder.
“Lyssa.”
Like a soft caress across a stormy sea, he reached out like a lifeline, and her soul latched onto him hungrily. Hunter tried to pull her into his arms, and she ached to go into them willingly. As much as she wanted to appear stiff and unyielding to the outside world, she longed to bend. When was the last time she had let someone comfort her? When was the last time she had let it out? When would she be able to let go of the past?
Lyssa turned to face Hunter and searched his eyes. They were smoky and sensual, while soft and comforting at the same time. If this was a test, she had a distinct suspicion that she was failing miserably. “Hunter.” Lyssa walked into his arms and rested her head on his shoulder.
“I’ve missed you.” He ran his arm up and down her back to soothe the memories away.
Did he just say he’d missed her? How do you miss someone you never really knew? “What did you say?” She pushed gently away from his body and looked at him with quiet concern.
“Lyssa, there is so much you won’t understand yet, so much that perhaps you never will.” Sadness crossed over his face.
He was still close enough that she could almost feel his breath on her face.”What do you need me to understand?”
“That every life is filled with second chances.”
Lyssa knew he was referring to what she had seen when she picked up the locket. “Karma, the wheel of life? Perhaps there was a reason it did not end well the first time?” Lyssa shrugged off the part of her that wanted to cling to the idea that destiny could very well be throwing them back together. She did not know him well enough to have those thoughts yet, no matter how appealing they were.
“We just didn’t have the right circumstances before. I’ve known you from the moment I saw you. I felt it. Didn’t you?”
“Well, to be honest, I had a lot of other things on my mind at the time. You’ll have to forgive me if some psychic bond to the afterlife never formed in my head. But I must ask if you knew the moment you saw me, why didn’t you say anything? And hypothetically speaking, why is it that only you remembered everything?”
“I wish I could say for sure. I think we all carry different things with us. I didn’t have the same burdens to carry in this life, not as you did. Maybe now you will remember more.” He ran a finger through the curl, trying to escape her hair tie.
It was nice to think that they had some connection that brought them together, but a sad thought entered her mind. “What if I don’t remember it all, Hunter?”
“Then we begin again, Lyssa. I know you have some feelings for me. No matter how hard you try, you can’t shut them off. I feel them here.” He put his hand over her heart, and she took a deep breath.
He was right. She did feel something for him, and it did feel like more than just some kind of attraction. “But you don’t really know me, Hunter. What if I am nothing like the person I was?” Was she enough? How could she measure up to a memory of someone she used to be if she had no idea who that was supposed to be? And with the skeletons in her closet, how could he overlook the darkness she buried deep inside?
“I look in your eyes, Lyssa, and I know everything that matters.” He smiled at her in such a way that if he asked her to walk out the door with him right now, she’d go, no matter the destination. “It’s true. We haven’t known each other long in this lifetime, Lyssa. But my soul will always remember.”
Lyssa’s heart started to turn over in her chest, and a slight flitter of hope ran through her. Maybe it was time to trust someone for a change, to find happiness in a moment, even if the future wasn’t a promise. “Where do we go from here, Hunter?”
Hunter pulled her into his arms. His face fell closer to hers, and she had the distinct impression that he was going to kiss her. Lyssa felt a need to flee, but her feet remained planted firmly on the ground, and her arms were suddenly lacking any motivation to push him away. She felt his breath close to her lips, and the last chance to move ended.
His lips hit hers before she could mutter a protest, and the warmth seeping from them was unexpected. Raising her hands to his chest, she grabbed a fistful of his shirt. Fighting an internal battle no one watching would see, flashing images entered her head so quickly she almost felt dizzy. His hand brushed across her face, and she could hear the small exhale of air when he moved his face away from hers. She pulled closer to him and put her head on his shoulder, allowing her to avoid his probing eye
s. There was something unusual about this moment, as the heartbeat at his throat pounded deliciously in her ears. This was new, but somehow it felt old and comfortable at the same time…as if this had happened to her before.
“Okay. That’s enough for now.” Hunter stepped away from her.
“Wait.” Her voice was soft and shaky when it left her mouth. “Why?”
He did not turn around, and she so desperately wanted to see his face. Was he laughing at her? Was this funny to him? What exactly was this supposed to be? When he did finally turn around, his features were schooled perfectly. “Because I remember.” Hunter let the words hang in the air.
“I wish I could.” The words left her mouth in a desperate whisper.
He smiled softly at her, the sadness replaced with hope. “One day at a time?” Hunter reached out his hand to her.
“Yes. I think that would be best.” Lyssa grabbed onto his hand and braced herself before they teleported back to her apartment.
Later that afternoon, Lyssa sat down at the table with the globe at the Watch Tower and let out a deep sigh. She was extremely confused about what had happened. When Lyssa tried to pull the flashing pictures back to the forefront of her mind, they just would not stick. At first, it was difficult to see, but when she put her mental feelers out there, she could sense the deep hurt Hunter was hiding as he left the garden, even though it would never show outwardly. Lyssa was relieved to see that the kiss had affected him as much as it had her, that a man could be sensitive to emotions.
That was her first real kiss, the only one that had made her tingle from her head to her toes. It’s not like she had never dated anyone before or had a relationship. She’d certainly been kissed before, but it had never felt like that one. Everything dulled in comparison. If only she knew what he wanted from her. Her past had created a need to throw herself into dangerous situations, just so she could prove that she maintained control. Lyssa was no saint, just a survivor.
