“Okay, baby,” he said as he opened his door, “please be careful. And remember what I said. Please, for me, trust your gut. I’m gonna be a nervous wreck until you come back.”
“I will,” she agreed as Tony shut his door. He rounded the car and opened the door for his Jules. She stepped out, looking sophisticated in her pencil skirt and her silk blouse. She had her hair pulled back with a few pieces dangling in her face. God, did she look gorgeous. He had to let her do her job, and she was great at it.
Tony’s attention was drawn to her long legs, which looked especially striking in the taupe heels she had on. He would never understand how women could wear heels. He took her hand in his and placed a chaste kiss on the back of it. He looked her in the eyes for an extra minute before he let her go. “I love you.”
“I love you too, Tony, more than you’ll ever know.”
He walked back to his car door as he watched her walk up the street. Once she was safely inside the café, he got back into his car. For some reason, his missions in Iraq and Afghanistan were on his mind. He remembered the day he lost Leroy: seeing Leroy’s insides lying outside his body and Rob wrapping them in a plastic bag in an effort to save him. He remembered Steve, who died on their last mission with Blackrain. That funeral had been filled with his friends and family. Tony recalled Steve’s last words: “Don’t let her go.” He would never forget that he was the last thought on Steve’s mind before he died.
Tony often wondered why he and Jules were on Steve’s mind. Steve didn’t have many family members —correction, the Unit was his family, just like the Unit was Tony’s family. But now he had Jules, who was a very important part of his family. He wondered if she had any idea that he planned on proposing to her that very night over dinner at their favorite Italian restaurant. God, he was so nervous. What if it was too soon? He glanced at the café and saw no sign of Jules. He relaxed a little bit. He looked at his watch. The time read 1210 hours. He exhaled. She hadn’t come running out yet, which was a good sign.
Tony had it all planned out. He was going to take her to a romantic dinner and put the ring in her wine glass. Corny and cliché sure, but he thought Jules would find the corniness romantic. She was a sucker for clichés too. It was going to be a private affair. He didn’t plan on causing a big scene, although he would get on one knee.
What if she said no? What if she thought it was too soon? After everything they had been through together, surely she had to know that he meant it when he said he adored her, he loved her, he was in love with her. She was his first love. How incredibly lucky he felt. His gut said she would say yes, and he was a confident man. She was able to be what he needed in the bedroom, just like he always knew she would be. She was his equal. She gave him a run for his money. She gave him love like no other person ever had. What they shared was something . . .
A loud ringing interrupted his thoughts. Smoke filled the air as flames shot out of the café. Tony’s ears were ringing so loudly he couldn’t concentrate on any thoughts. People were down on the ground in front of the café. Momentarily, he forgot where he was. For a moment, he thought he was back in Afghanistan where bombings were everyday occurrences. Then it struck him. He was in the States. Bombings rarely happened and never at small cafés.
Jules, his head screamed at him. He jumped out of the car and raced up the street. He couldn’t get into the building as it was engulfed in flames. He dropped to his knees and held his head in his hands. Jules. “Fuck. Jules,” he screamed. There was carnage all around him, but he could only focus on her. “Jules,” he screamed again as tears streamed in a river down his face.
Jules was in there. He had to find her. He had to save her. He started toward the alleyway between the café and the adjoining building and ran to the back door. The door wasn’t that hot. Because the front door was open, he knew, if he opened the back door, there was a chance the flames would engulf him. But he didn’t care. That was his Jules. Why would he want to live without her?
He knew from experience that this was a bomb. After the initial explosion, the fire would be isolated to the bomb and the surrounding area. The whole place wouldn’t be engulfed in flames. He felt confident in opening the back door, but he didn’t feel as confident in finding Jules alive.
A quick search of the surrounding area found him a mangled piece of steel to pry the door open. Working quickly, he paid no mind to the sharp ends of the steel slicing through the flesh on his palms. He didn’t feel any physical pain, but emotional pain was another story. He had to find his Jules. Alive.
Once inside the café, he exited the kitchen and went to the seating area, looking for his Jules. He found her lying on the floor, her face badly burnt, her previously long brown hair singed and short to the top of her head. He dropped to his knees and sobbed as she lay limp on the charred floor. The fire was still burning toward the front of the building.
He grabbed Jules and pulled her lifeless body back toward the kitchen. Cradling her in his arms, he kissed the top of her head as he rocked her back and forth. He couldn’t keep the sobs that wracked his body at bay. His tears dripped down onto her face. How was he ever going to live without her? She was his one true love, forever and always. The smell of burnt flesh seared his nostrils and made him gag. He swallowed down the bile that was rising in his throat. He had to be strong for Jules. She was going to need him to recover.
Was this the terrorists trying to get Jules or Barone? He didn’t know, but one thing was for sure, he wanted vengeance. He rocked her and cried until the firetrucks and ambulances arrived.
“Sir, you have to let me examine her,” the paramedic said.
“Sir, it’s not safe in here,” the fireman said. “Please, sir, let me have her so the paramedic can do his job.”
“I’ll take her,” Tony said, defeated. He wasn’t going to let her go. He couldn’t. Reluctantly, he picked her up and carried her to an ambulance. “You have to treat her. Get her back. I can’t live without her,” he demanded of the medic at the ambulance.
The medic placed two fingers to her carotid artery and shook his head. Tony hung his head and sobbed into Jules’s neck. She couldn’t be gone. He just got her back. After everything they had been through, tonight was the night he was going to ask her to be his forever.
“I’m sorry, sir. Please let me have her,” the medic said carefully. Tony hesitantly handed over his Jules over.
“What do I do now?” a tormented Tony asked. But it wasn’t really a question for the medic as much as it was a question for God. Tony took a seat on the sidewalk beside the ambulance. Jules’s body was placed on the ground and covered with a sheet. Tony felt numb. Sweat was dripping from his eyebrows and his face had turned pale. His breathing was heavy and labored.
The medic approached Tony. “I think you’re in shock, sir. Can you follow my penlight?” He lifted his pen to Tony’s line of sight and moved it side to side, but Tony couldn’t respond.
The medic helped him over to the ambulance and put him on a cot, elevating his legs before starting a bag of fluids.
Tony was completely numb. He couldn’t think. He couldn’t feel. He didn’t want to feel. He would shut everything back off. Shutting down was his defense mechanism to get him through horrific things.
He had to make the call. He picked up his cell and dialed Blackrain. “Can I talk to Tyrrell?” he asked the receptionist.
“Just one moment please. Is this Tony?”
“Yes.”
The receptionist transferred him to Tyrrell. “Tyrrell, can you get the rest of the Unit and put me on speakerphone?”
“Sure, but what’s wrong. You don’t sound like yourself.”
“I’ll tell you when everyone is there. I can’t speak the words more than once. Please, Tyrrell.”
“Sure, Tony. I’ll be right back with Rob and Michael.”
Tony didn’t comment, he just waited on the line. A minute later, he heard Michael’s voice. “What’s wrong, buddy?”
“Jul
es is dead,” Tony said matter-of-factly, “and I want to get the motherfucker who killed her.”
The men were silent for a moment, taking in what Tony had said.
Michael was the first to respond. “You got it, brother. Where are you?”
“I’m at Jules’s. How soon can you be here?”
“We’re leaving now. And, Tony, don’t do anything stupid,” Michael warned his brother.
Tony hung up the phone, and although he was never one to drink much, he popped open a beer and allowed the smooth liquid to travel down the back of his throat. He finished the beer in under two minutes and popped open another one. Thank God he’d bought a case.
Aboard the jet, Tyrrell said, “I’ve never heard Tony in so much pain. I’m afraid for him.”
“Me too,” Michael concurred. “He sounded devastated.”
“I know exactly how he feels,” Rob said, “and I’ll be there for him to talk to.”
“Yeah, but Tony’s different than you, Rob. He shuts everything off. What if he never turns it back on?” Michael questioned.
“With the right support, he’ll come around. After all, time and love heals all wounds.”
“We have to plan a funeral for closure first before we kill the motherfucker that took her life,” Michael said as he fidgeted in his seat. His brother’s loss was really affecting him. He remembered back to the times when he thought he had lost Emma. The feeling was indescribable.
“Exactly, Tony needs closure,” Rob said. “I’m not saying it’s going to be easy, but we can get him back.”
The men arrived at Dulles International and taxied to their parking spot. After disembarking the plane, they went right for the SUV waiting for them. They set the GPS to Jules’s address. A little later, they were parking the vehicle on the street out front of Jules’s townhome.
“Rob, why don’t you go in first?”
Rob took the steps two at a time and was ringing the bell in three strides. After Tony opened the door, Rob turned to look at the other men. Tony was drunk. He couldn’t believe it. He had never seen Tony drunk. “Hey, brother. How are you holding up?” Rob asked softly as he stepped into the townhome.
“I’m fine,” Tony said, raising the beer above his head as if to toast Rob’s arrival.
“You are not fine,” Rob said. “Let’s sit down before you fall down.”
“Okay,” Tony said nonchalantly. He stumbled to the coach and fell into it.
“What did you say?” Rob asked. Tony had been mumbling to himself. Tony didn’t answer; he just looked at Rob with a pained stare as he grabbed a handful of his hair and pulled on it.
“Why don’t you sleep it off, and then we can get down to business. You’re no good like this,” Rob declared. Rob rose to help Tony stand and walked him up the stairs to the bedroom.
Just hours before, Tony had made love to Jules in that bedroom. Now his world was gone. Rob helped him into bed and he curled into a fetal position, hugging Jules’s pillow and inhaling her scent. Tony rubbed his arm, subconsciously trying to comfort himself. He didn’t even know how bad he was hurting. The alcohol was doing a good job of masking his feelings. He’d tried to shut everything down, but it wasn’t working like it used to.
Tony’s shoulders curled and he just started shaking his head in disbelief. Rob shut the door silently and allowed him to grieve in private.
It was nighttime when Tony woke with a start and a splitting headache. His mouth was dry and so were his eyes from crying so much. He sat up and rocked himself in place while cradling Jules’s pillow. What was he going to do? He lost his reason for living. He could feel his heart racing in his chest, and he could only hope for God to take him too.
He waited a moment to see if God was listening, but apparently, God chose to be deaf to his cries of agony. Tony stood and made his way downstairs. He went straight to the cupboard where Jules kept the Advil and downed four. Then he got a large glass of orange juice. Once he had chugged the OJ, he felt a renewed purpose. For some reason, he felt an energy that he had never known. He felt wired and ready to go.
He approached the men waiting anxiously in the living room. Tony began pacing back and forth in front of the men. “We have to get that motherfucker, Barone.”
“We will. But first we need to have a funeral,” Rob said. “You need closure.”
Tony laughed. “That is something I’ll never have.” With a shaky voice, he said, “I don’t want to go to her funeral. I refuse to admit she’s dead. There’s a part of me that feels her with me.”
“That’s natural,” Rob said. “It takes a while before that goes away.”
“You don’t understand. I know. I know she isn’t dead. It hit me like an epiphany. I got an overwhelming feeling. I know she isn’t dead. I can feel her. And she’s waiting for me to find her.”
“Let’s call her parents and have them set up the funeral,” Rob offered.
“Fuck no. Her parents don’t deserve to see their daughter one last time. You have no idea what her bastard father did to her. Please, guys, let’s just get Barone, and if we don’t find her in the process, then we’ll have a funeral.”
“I think you need closure before you can move on,” Rob concluded.
“I’ll never have closure. Don’t you understand? I need her here with me. I need her. I just have this feeling that she isn’t dead. It’s been gnawing at me since I woke up, and it’s only getting louder.”
The men looked at each other with knowing expressions. “All right,” Michael said, “we’ll do it your way. But I’m confused. Why did you tell us she was dead?”
“Because I held her dead body in my arms. But I had a thought as I awoke: what if that wasn’t her?”
“You think, rather than kill her, Barone took her again?”
“Barone wanted her alive. It doesn’t make sense to kill her so easily,” Tony said as he repetitively motioned with his fingers. His gaze darted between the men, looking for someone to agree with him.
Michael broke the silence first. “Okay. We get Barone and take him out.”
“That’s the only way she’ll be safe,” Tony said, clearly in denial. He was willing to do anything to get his Jules back. He just knew she wasn’t dead. “Look, I know you think I’m crazy, but the woman I thought was Jules, well, I’m not so sure anymore.”
“What do you mean?” Tyrrell questioned.
“She was dressed like Jules, but she didn’t have Jules’s hair and her face was unrecognizable.
“Okay. Okay,” Tyrrell said, “let’s assume you’re right. We have to get to Barone.”
“That’s all I could think about while waiting for you guys to get here. We already have a listing of all his properties. We’ll just have to clear each one until we find him.”
“We need to narrow it down. Which one do we think he’s at and why?” Tyrrell questioned.
Tony grabbed the list from the kitchen table and brought it to the men. “He needs a residence. I’m sure no one would be stupid enough to go to his residence. It’s probably heavily fortified with the best security money can buy. This guy has to have enemies. And his biggest enemy is standing right in front of you.”
“All right. Let’s narrow this down. We can cross off all warehouses and ships. We can also cross off this piece of farm real estate he has on the outskirts of Richmond.”
“That would be a perfect residence for him. He could see people coming from miles away. He could heavily secure his compound. And I have a feeling he’s not living in a farm house. When he purchased it, it may have been a farmhouse. But now, it’s probably a mansion,” Tony argued.
“Okay, we’ll start there,” Tyrrell said, settling the matter.
Jules walked into the café and ordered herself a skinny vanilla latte. She found a table at the side of the restaurant perfect for two to have an intimate conversation. Having no idea what her source looked like, she would have to hope that he recognized her. After all, her picture was in the paper and her image was
plastered all over the television. She was proud of herself. She wasn’t a quitter, and besides, she could never leave the job she loved. Getting to the bottom of things was her specialty. God knew Tony begged her to quit after the three stooges had taken her hostage. But she held her ground.
Jules gazed out the window and watched rain droplets starting to fall. She was thankful she didn’t schedule her meeting outside on the patio of the café. She could hear the raindrops, large and heavy, fall on the roof. What she really wanted to be doing, truth be told, was make love to Tony during this thunderstorm. There, lying under the cool sheet, feeling his body pressed against hers. God, was she hooked on that man. She shook her head to redirect her thoughts.
She kept a close eye on the front door as men and women dressed in business attire came in and out of the café. Which one was he? Finally, a man approached her. He sat without a coffee in hand. “Are you Julia Bakas?”
“Yes. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Weimar. I’ve been waiting a long time to talk to you.”
“Listen,” he said, “do you think it possible to talk in my car? I would just feel safer there.”
“She stood hesitantly and grabbed her coffee from the table. When she started toward the front of the café, he grabbed her arm.
“This way,” he explained. “I’m parked in back.”
“We can’t go out through the kitchen,” Jules admonished.
“Sure we can. I know the owner.”
Jules turned to follow Mr. Weimar through the kitchen.
“Hello, Harry,” Mr. Weimar said with a grave look in his eyes as he led Jules through the kitchen by placing his hand on the small of her back.
Harder (The Unit #3) Page 16