by Shelia Grace
My hands fell to her head, stroking her hair. Her mouth felt so good, but suddenly all I wanted was to feel her pussy tighten around my cock as I fucked her until she came beneath me. She sucked me harder, her lips moving faster up and down the length of my cock, and suddenly I lost all rational thought. I gripped the sheets, and with a groan I felt my cock pumping against the softness of her mouth. Trying to catch my breath, I laughed.
“Are you sure you’ve never done that before?” I asked, rising up on my elbows.
Her lips were puffy, her cheeks flushed.
“Are you calling me a ho, sir?” she grinned.
“I’m calling you adept.”
“Well, good. Because that was all one big guess.”
“A good guess, then.”
She blushed as I got up and walked into the bathroom. When I came back, Alex had already slipped into my T-shirt. Dutifully putting the flannel pajamas back on, I got into bed next to her and wrapped my arms around her. As I stroked her arm, it occurred to me how completely fucked I would have been if I had slept with Brenda’s friend tonight.
Sarah, my “date” from earlier, had called in the middle of the week—at the precise the moment when I had thought the chances of seeing Alex again were less than zero. When she had mentioned getting a drink, it had just seemed easier to give in and invite her over for a glass of wine. Sure, at the time, in the back of my head, I had contemplated the possibility of sleeping with her.
But if I had been in bed with her when Alex had texted me? Jesus. I didn’t even want to think about it.
“What are you thinking about?”
When I looked down at Alex, she laughed hilariously.
“Oh shit! I’m totally not supposed to ask that. It’s like guy poison, right?”
“I was thinking how lucky I am.”
“Really?”
I nodded.
“Yeah, you totally are lucky,” she laughed.
She laid her head back on my chest. Pulling her close, I closed my eyes.
When I woke up, there was light pouring through the blinds. I blinked and cursed when I saw that I was alone in bed. Shit. Either last night had been a vivid fucking dream, or Alex had taken off again. I groaned and rolled out of bed. Then I heard someone moving around the house and smelled—coffee? And food. Walking into the kitchen, I found Alex standing at the stove in nothing but my T-shirt. There were bowls of chopped fruit on the counter. The coffee pot was full. Finn got up from where he had been lying at Alex’s feet, and when she turned around and saw me, she jumped.
“Shit! You scared the hell out of me!”
“I thought last night was a dream.”
She grinned at me.
“Yeah. Me, too. Then I realized I was way too comfortable to be at the dorm … and there was this hot guy in bed next to me. For a second I thought I had died.”
She flipped an enormous omelet onto the plate and looked up.
“Are you okay?” she asked.
I shook my head.
“Don’t say things like that. Please.”
I walked over and slipped my arms around her from behind, smelling her hair.
“Sorry,” she sighed. “My mom has a fucked up sense of humor. She talks about death the way other people talk about the weather. I guess I got that from her.” She stopped and looked back at me, grinning. “All right, so I thought I was going to make you breakfast in bed, but you’re up now, so …”
She went over, poured a cup of coffee, and handed it to me.
“I basically made it stronger than I thought a normal human could tolerate.”
I took a gulp.
“It could be a little stronger.”
She gave me a look.
“Riiight.”
She split the omelet into uneven pieces, giving me the larger part, and then took a bagel out of the toaster and sliced it in half.
“I didn’t know if you wanted butter, cream cheese, or jam, but you had all three, so they’re on the table.”
I picked up the bowls of fruit and my coffee, and Alex carried the omelet plates to the table. Taking the fork, I cut off a square of omelet.
“You didn’t tell me you could cook,” I said accusingly.
“You can cook, Ryan Bennett. Omelets are the extent of my culinary expertise.”
I devoured the food, thrilled to be eating a meal that I didn’t have to prepare. Looking up, I tried to remember the last time someone had cooked me breakfast, but I couldn’t. It hadn’t been Gretchen. That was for sure.
“Alex …”
She looked up at me and cringed.
“Was it awful?”
I shook my head.
“It was great.”
I love you.
Three words. But I couldn’t say them. Maybe I never would be able to.
Chapter 23
Alex
Ryan was looking at me funny, like he was about to tell me that last night had been a big mistake. And my first instinct was to beat him to it. But I had tried that already, and suddenly I decided that if he was going to change his mind after last night, then that was his problem.
“Would you go somewhere with me?”
I blinked at his question and then nodded slowly. It was the weekend, and now that I wasn’t failing Calculus, I didn’t have the nagging sense that I should be locked in the dorm trying to avert an academic apocalypse. Standing up, I started collecting the dishes.
“I take it I’ll need to change,” I said lightly, looking down at his T-shirt.
He laughed, and I realized that I wanted to steal all of his T-shirts so that I could keep the smell of him even after this was over. Because this was going to end. Our time together was limited, and if I couldn’t at least accept that, then I had no right to be here. Reality wasn’t going to change for me, but if I could just have more time, maybe it would be enough.
Fuck. It had to be.
I walked into the kitchen and started washing the dishes. Like Mom, I was perfectly capable of dismantling a kitchen just to make one meal, so Ryan’s kitchen was a mess. Looking around, I was struck again by how adult Ryan was. Yeah, legally I was an adult. But the decade that separated us suddenly seemed vast. Sure, he had introduced me to his parents, but as what? Not his girlfriend. And what if I introduced him to my parents? Or to Julie? Rachel? I looked up when Ryan came in and started putting things back in the refrigerator. Smiling, he poured himself another cup of coffee.
“I’ve got the rest of the dishes.”
“Are you sure?”
He nodded.
“Towels are in the closet,” he said before going into the pantry and taking out a scoop of food for Finn.
In the guestroom, I grabbed the toiletry bag from my backpack and then went and took a towel from the closet before going into the hall bathroom and brushing my teeth. I slipped out of the T-shirt and listened as Ryan walked down the hall into his bedroom. Showering quickly, I got out and toweled off my hair before running a comb through it. I examined myself in the mirror and smiled, imagining Ryan’s ex cringing in horror at me—no blow dryer, no makeup.
Wrapping the towel around myself, I stepped into the hall, expecting to hear the shower in Ryan’s bathroom running. Instead, he was standing in the doorway to his room. His blond hair was slicked back, and all he was wearing was a pair of jeans. This just made me think of seeing him completely naked only hours after we had first met. My eyes darted lower, and then I smiled crookedly before turning and rushing into the guestroom. The door swung open a second later, and I stared up at Ryan, who shut the door after him. His eyes were hungry.
“Alex,” he growled. “You’re not making it any easier for me to control myself.”
“What? I’m wearing a towel, and you’ve seen me naked before,” I squeaked. “I’ve seen you, too. Remember?”
“Not helping.”
He was right in front of me, and I couldn’t stop my eyes from traveling to the muscles his chest, which flexed as his hands clenched.
Suddenly he reached up and tugged at the towel. It fell around my feet, and I swallowed as he leaned down. His lips brushed my ear, and I shivered, closing my eyes. Each breath hitched in my chest.
When my phone buzzed on the nightstand, I jumped, but Ryan just reached over and silenced it before lifting me onto the bed. I watched in awe as he started undoing his belt.
“Do you trust me?” he asked quietly.
I flinched at his question. He had given me no reason not to trust him, but I could barely trust myself lately. And didn’t the question itself sort of imply that I couldn’t trust him? The problem was that I did. I trusted him more than I trusted my own judgment lately.
“Yes,” I said, clearing my throat.
Very gently, he pushed me back onto the bed. Then he began pulling my hands over my head. Seconds later, his leather belt cinched around my wrists, and I squeaked. It wasn’t tight enough to hurt, but it was tight enough that I couldn’t pull loose. I watched, barely breathing, as he reached into his back pocket and took out a silk tie. Leaning forward, he stroked the side of my face before pulling the silk over my eyes. He lifted my head and tied it at the back, and I felt my pulse jump as the bed shifted under his weight. I couldn’t tell where he was, and when his lips touched mine, I gasped. Not being able to see him was strange, frightening … exciting. Warmth pooled low in my abdomen.
“Do you know how badly I’ve wanted you since that first night?” he whispered, his lips close to my ear.
His fingers trailed from the side of my breast down to my hip, and I tensed.
“Alex,” he breathed against my temple. “I will never hurt you, and I won’t make love to you until I am one hundred percent sure you’re ready. I promise. Right now I only want you to feel good.”
I jerked when I felt his teeth graze one nipple, then the other. Whimpering, I strained against the belt.
“Do you want more?”
I swallowed and nodded.
“I need to hear you say it,” he growled.
“Yes.”
Could he hear the desperation in my voice? Suddenly his lips were on my throat … the side of my breast … my stomach … lower. His hands began parting my legs, and as his fingers spread me open, my breathing became harsh as I remembered the feel of his mouth from last night. When his tongue flicked out and touched me, I moaned. Then his mouth was on me, sucking, caressing, stroking. My hips bucked against his hold as his tongue teased me until I couldn’t stand it.
“Please,” I begged.
He stopped, and I could feel every cell of my body cry out with craving.
“Tell me, Alex.”
I felt his finger replace his lips as he slipped the silk slipped from my eyes. His normally bright blue eyes were dark as he stared down at me, and I realized—maybe with a little disappointment—that he was still wearing his jeans as I writhed naked beneath him.
“Tell me,” he whispered urgently.
“Ryan, I want you.”
His lips were on mine again, his kiss more insistent than before. The moment his tongue thrust between my lips, his finger came down, and I gasped as he began to stroke me faster, pushing me toward the edge.
“I need to watch you come,” he urged raggedly.
I sobbed, my muscles clenching as a sharp wave of pleasure swept through me. He didn’t stop. His blue eyes burned into mine as he continued to caress me until every last spasm had shuddered through me. Then he leaned forward and slipped the belt from my wrists, kissing my forehead as he pulled away. I frowned as he took out his phone and started to make a call.
“I’d like to make a reservation for the twenty-third and the twenty-fourth. No, the panorama suite. Ryan Bennett. My account is on file. Thank you.”
He ended the call, and I sat up, suddenly aware that I was completely naked, and he was making business calls. I couldn’t help feeling pretty fucking insulted. It would have almost made sense if he just slapped a couple of bills on the bed—only he was the one who had made me come.
“You have until the end of the term to change your mind,” he said quietly.
“What do you mean?” I mumbled, looking around for my backpack—and my clothes.
“I booked a room in San Francisco.”
My throat went dry. There was no mistaking his meaning. I had three weeks to decide if I was ready … if I wanted to be with him—no turning back. Ryan leaned over and picked up my bag, handing it to me. I pulled out a change of clothes as he stood watching me.
“What?” I asked self-consciously.
He smiled through gritted teeth.
“I need to leave, or I won’t let you get dressed.”
When he opened the door, I saw poor Finn lying in the doorway looking dejected. As Ryan’s dog trotted down the hallway after him, I put on my panties and bra. Three weeks.
My phone buzzed again, and with a sigh, I pulled it out of my bag. Looking down, I felt my fingers go numb.
Surprise! Driving from your Aunt Karen’s now! Almost to your dorm. See you soon. Mom
My head began to spin, and for a second I seriously thought I was going to pass out. Holy fucking shit. What the hell, Mom? Of course she would decide to visit Aunt Karen and “pop in” on me. Mom never did anything unless she could accomplish multiple goals in one swoop, and Aunt Karen had just had surgery, so I was sure Mom had figured she could visit her sister—and then drive an hour to see me. In her mind, the whole thing made perfect sense—and so did not giving me any notice. After all, what else would I be doing on a Saturday other than studying?
“Ryan!”
Yanking on my clothes, I stepped out into the hallway. Ryan walked out of his room—wearing a shirt this time.
“Are you okay?”
I shook my head.
“My mom is going to be at the dorms any minute. I need to go back … now.”
“Is she checking up on you?” he smiled.
“More like sneaking up on me.”
I already had my bag swung over my shoulder.
“I had been hoping to keep you for the rest of the day …”
I felt a pang of regret. I wanted to see Mom, but part of me was afraid that the second I let go of Ryan Bennett he would dissolve into mist. Following him to the front of the house, I reached down and patted Finn on the head. When we got to the curb, Ryan clicked the locks on the Audi. I winced, trying not to think about what would happen if Mom ever caught me on the back of a motorcycle. It wouldn’t be good, and would probably involve her head spinning like a demon-possession movie.
As we drove toward Mercer, I realized that I was much more concerned with my life intersecting with his than he seemed to have been the night of his parents’ event. But the thought of trying to explain to Mom what I was doing with a guy ten years older than I was … I shuddered at the thought. When we were almost to Lincoln and Amherst, I pointed toward the corner and Ryan frowned.
“You can drop me off here,” I said quickly.
He shook his head.
“Mercer’s right there.”
And Mom might be there already, I thought silently. He pulled into the parking lot on the corner, and I leaned over quickly and kissed him, grabbing my backpack from the backseat. As I opened the door, I almost said, I love you, but I didn’t. Jumping out, I walked toward the crosswalk and scanned the dorm parking lot across the street for Mom’s 4Runner. When I looked back, Ryan’s car was in the turning lane, two cars back. As soon as the walk signal came on, I stepped off the curb. It was starting to sprinkle, and I thought about my jacket, which I had stupidly left sitting in my closet in the dorm. I was almost to the other side when I felt a piece of gum stick to my shoe.
“Dammit.”
I looked down. Then I turned my head to the right and saw a car coming up fast in the right-hand lane. I blinked.
The car wasn’t going to stop.
Screaming, I tried to lunge out of the way.
Chapter 24
Ryan
I was watching Alex cross the str
eet when I saw a car coming up fast in the right-turn lane. Jumping out of my car, I began shouting and running through traffic. Then, before I could reach her, Alex’s small frame bounced off the hood and onto the asphalt. I jumped over the hood of a car in the middle of the intersection and dialed 9-1-1.
“What’s your emergency?”
“I need an ambulance on the corner of Lincoln and Amherst for a hit and run victim.”
When the fucking dispatcher asked for my name, I just cursed. There was blood on Alex’s forehead. By the time I kneeled down next to her, my entire body was cold. I touched her cheek and waited for her to wake up.
“Alex?”
Her eyes remained closed, and the gash over her forehead was bleeding heavily. I looked around for the car that had hit her, and for a few bloodthirsty seconds, I was more interested in exacting revenge on the shithead who had run the red.
In the distance, I heard the wail of a siren. Then screaming. I knelt down and felt her pulse. It was weak, but it was there. I checked her breathing next. Still breathing. Several people had crowded around, but it was the woman who burst through the group who held my attention.
“Alexis! Baby! Oh my god! No, no, no!”
I looked up at the woman, momentarily stunned by how much she looked like her daughter. The only difference was she had blue eyes instead of green and light brown hair rather than Alex’s reddish brown. The chirp of the ambulance got louder, and seconds later the medics broke through.
“Alex Reed. Eighteen. She’s been unconscious three minutes. She’s breathing and has a pulse. Her mother goes with her.”
The medic put the C collar on her.
“Any neurological history?”
I looked at her mother as they lifted Alex onto the stretcher. The woman shook her head.
