by Amy McClung
Two hours went by and I hadn’t heard anything else from him. I was so mad that I started slamming stuff around and throwing things in aggravation. I didn’t hear the front door open over the commotion I was causing. Quinn walked in as I threw a pillow from the couch. He ducked and hooted, “A heads up would've been nice there, slugger!” as he smiled at me.
“It’s not funny, you better tell me now what's going on Quinn Roberts or I swear to God you'll never see me again. I won't put up with secrets and lies,” I stated firmly to him.
He came toward me, “Man, you keep using my full name. I must really be in trouble. What's my punishment?” He said in a sexy tone as his left eyebrow cocked upward.
I backed away and put my hand up. “You won't distract me with kisses or sweet talk. Tell me right now what Mitchell had to talk to you about yesterday. I mean it, or you can walk out that door and never come back.” I threw my hand toward the door in an angry motion.
My body shook with anger and I could see that it worried Quinn, but I didn’t care. He put his hands up in surrender. “Wow, you really are mad. Look, I'm here to tell you everything, baby. Just sit down with me, please…Please?” I sat on the recliner; I didn’t want to sit next to him on the couch where he could distract me with romantic interludes. The pull to be near him was strong, but I had to fight it. I needed to know what was happening. If Mitchell killed Christine, he was out of control and I would have to get rid of him. I could not take the chance that he would hurt anyone else. It’s one thing to turn someone, but to kill them so violently; I couldn’t sit by and tolerate that.
“Mitchell came to me the other day because he wanted to tell me about Christine.” That was as far as he got before I reacted. I jumped up out of the chair in a state of panic.
“I knew it! Oh my god, he killed her. I can’t believe you kept this from me. What if he gets out of control with Jackie?” I was becoming hysterical and instantly Quinn’s hands were on my shoulders and he was looking me in the eyes.
I tried to push him away, but he used his super strength to keep me stationary. “Mitchell didn’t kill Christine and that's why he had to find me and tell me right away. He knew that's what we would think.” I kept struggling against him. “Do you think I would let him anywhere near you guys if I thought he was that out of control?” he asked, then he freed me by throwing his arms up to show me he gave in.
“How did he know she was dead?” I asked as I backed away from him and paced back and forth in front of the fireplace.
“He found her; he smelled her blood when he was walking home. She was killed in the woods near his house. When he smelled the blood it aroused his hunger and he took off toward it without thinking and then stopped himself before getting out of control. When he realized what was happening, he sniffed out the blood to see if someone was hurt and he found her. He left her there to find me, said he was scared to tell anyone else. He was telling the truth, Parker. Trust me.”
Trust him? That’s a laugh. Especially when this isn’t the first time he has lied to me. I sat down on the recliner again and put my head in my hands. “So, who or what killed Christine?” I asked him.
“Mitchell and I have been trying to figure that out since it happened. We've had no luck, but it does look like a vampire. Her throat was completely ripped open and there was a lot of blood, but it was evident some had been drained as well. Her head was nearly gone and there should've been more blood.” I sat down dizzy. The idea of Christine being torn apart had my stomach churning over the imagery in my head. I couldn’t stand much more of this. “I swear that neither of us has turned any vampires and we have no clue if this was a local or one that had strolled into town for fresh blood.”
Quinn sat on the couch quietly watching me as I took in everything. “Parker, sweetie, are you alright?” I choked down the bile rising in my throat and tried to erase the images I had created of her. I didn’t even notice Quinn left the room until he came back with a lemon-lime soda he grabbed from the fridge. He placed his cold hand against my head, to help cool me off, to keep me from being sick. My temperature is so unlike a regular person that it didn’t really make much of a difference, but the soda did.
After taking a few sips, my insides seemed to calm down and I was able to focus again. He had a worried look on his face, like he thought I would never forgive him. It crossed my mind. Once I finished the soda, I sat it on the table and turned to him. He closed his eyes when I placed my palm against his cheek. Leaning forward, I pressed my lips softly against his.
All I wanted was to feel something good right now, something to take my mind off this gruesome murder and my life for the past few years. I wanted to be an average girl, doing something with her regular boyfriend. Vampires and werewolves, none of that existed at this moment because I wouldn’t let it. This was our time, mine and Quinn’s, and no one else was invited. For the next little bit, we were going to be in a world of our own. Our moment was becoming more passionate. He lifted me into his arms and swiftly carried me upstairs, never breaking the kiss. He took me to my bedroom and lay me on the bed. When his mouth moved to my neck, every other thought left my mind and I let myself feel this euphoria.
Sitting up, I removed my shirt, exposing my bra. I wanted him so much and I could tell by his passion that he wanted me too. Through his eyes, I could feel the intensity of his love for me. Our bodies fit together like a puzzle and it was amazing. This was the moment I had dreamed of. I always thought my first time would hurt, but it didn’t feel anything but breathtaking. He lay back on the pillow and pulled me against his chest with my head against his heart. It’s a weird sensation to have your head against someone’s heart and not feel it beat; even stranger that I was out of breath and he was laying still, his chest never rising. He pulled the blanket up to cover me. I whispered, “I love you so much.”
He kissed my head and said, “I love you more.”
With his arms around me, I fell asleep with a smile on my face. It was getting dark outside by the time I opened my eyes and found myself in bed alone. My first thought was that Quinn regretted what happened and he couldn’t stand to face me. And then I came to my senses and realized that there was probably a viable reason that he left and that I needed to have more faith in him and in our relationship.
My stomach growled to remind me I hadn’t eaten in a while, plus I had worked up an appetite. I grinned at the memory. Curious to see if I looked any different, I got out of bed and walked over to the mirror. The thing I'm sure most girls do when they officially become a woman. I didn’t look any different, but I felt different inside which was just as good. The atmosphere in the house even seemed different; it was like waking up a brand new person.
My feet touched the top of the stairs and my nose picked up an aroma coming from below where I found Quinn in the kitchen…cooking? I slid my arms around him from behind and kissed his naked back. “I thought you didn’t cook?”
He turned to face me and gave me a quick peck on the lips. “Let’s just say my cooking skills are incredibly limited. But after what just happened, I figured I owed you a decent meal. Plus, your stomach woke me up with its growling. I think you have a grizzly bear in there.”
There’s that amazing grin of his, I think that's what I love most, it melts me every time. “I thought you'd left, should've known you're too much of a romantic to do something like that,” I said.
He harrumphed and said, “You really need to have more faith in my feelings for you, but I guess I can’t blame you after…”
I put my finger to his lip and shook my head. “Don’t finish that thought. I do need to have more faith and it is no one’s fault, but my own insecurities.” And I stood on my tiptoes, reached up, and forced his lips against mine. He gave in pretty easily to my feminine wiles.
Jackie opened the door and announced herself. When she saw us in the kitchen, she stopped. Quinn ha
d no shirt on and I had on a robe, which I had to straighten when I saw her, so I think she figured it out. She looked a little mortified and turned her back to us. Quinn’s chest was muscular so maybe that's why she felt weird, maybe she felt attracted to him. Jackie has been with Mitchell for two years so she should know that people dating do tend to have sex, but she looked really awkward. Quinn excused himself after saying hello to Jackie and he headed upstairs to shower and dress. Jackie turned around finally and came to the couch.
“You okay?” I asked her.
She blushed, “I didn’t mean to interrupt you guys. I didn’t know Quinn would be here. I was planning on spending the night tonight, is that still cool?”
“Of course, don’t be silly. I promised my parents that Quinn wouldn't spend the night, so he'll be leaving shortly.” I answered. Jackie still looked uncomfortable. “What’s wrong, Jackie?”
She fidgeted a bit and answered, “I can’t believe that you guys already had sex, I feel like a little kid or something now.”
“Are you telling me that you and Mitchell haven’t had sex yet?” I asked perplexed. Now she looked even more humiliated, this made me feel like a tool. “Jackie it’s nothing to be ashamed of, whether you have or haven’t. Actually I should be the one feeling ashamed, Quinn and I have barely been together a month, but it just felt right. I always told myself I would know by my gut feeling. And everything told me it was the right time, plus I’m eighteen now, just completes the whole voyage into womanhood…”
Her expression became even more mortified, so I tried to rephrase, “Not that, doing…that, is the only thing that makes you a woman. I always assumed you two had…you know…since you've been together so long.” Wow, Parker, you really know how to make a girl feel good; I keep digging a deeper grave so I stopped talking.
“We've come close but I've always stopped it. I've always been too scared to go all the way. Does it hurt?” she asked innocently.
“It didn’t hurt for me; it just felt like the best moment ever. It felt like Quinn and I connected in a deeper way. I think it would be like that for you too, as much as you and Mitchell love each other.” She smiled and put her head against mine.
Quinn came downstairs, fully dressed this time to my disappointment. He leaned over and kissed me goodbye. He and Mitchell would be over in the morning for our pizza and movie day. A reminder had to be given to bring our other guest, Will. He grimaced but assured me he had not forgotten. He told Jackie goodbye and kissed her on the cheek. "You girls have fun," he added. She blushed when he kissed her and stuttered a goodbye to him.
Once he left we started into the typical slumber party mode. First she wanted to know all the gritty details about what led up to what she walked in on. She went on and on about how incredibly sexy and buff Quinn was and I smacked her with a pillow, “Watch how you talk about my man.” It was hard to keep a straight face when saying that and we both laughed to the brink of tears.
Once we calmed down a bit, she got serious again, “Can I tell you something?” Of course, I nodded, even though I was a little afraid of what she was going to say. “I wish I had been with Mitchell before he…before he changed.” She seemed to be a bit embarrassed at that statement and I realized it must be the whole dead guy thing that freaked her out.
“Oh, no it’s not like it’s weird or anything. I mean, Quinn is just like a regular guy. He doesn’t breathe or have a heartbeat, but it isn’t weird.”
She had a look of confusion on her face and started giggling, “No, it’s not that. I… this is embarrassing…” I placed my hand on hers.
“You can tell me, it'll stay between us.” She smiled and her cheeks blushed. “I'd like to know how it would be different, between human and vampire. Is it weird to think that way?” Thankfully that was all she was worried about.
I laughed, "No, it's not weird at all."
We enjoyed our night together with more girl talk. This was our chance to act like typical teenage girls for a change and we painted our nails, talked about boys, watched romantic movies and crashed on the couch and the recliner when the exhaustion took over.
The next morning I woke up to the doorbell ringing. Pulling myself up out of the recliner, I ran over and flung the door open. I hoped to find Quinn standing there, but instead it was Will. He looked me up and down for a minute and a smirk came over his face. I slept in a fitted tank top and pajama pants so I felt a bit exposed. My arms immediately crossed in front of my chest to cover myself. I invited him in and escorted him to the kitchen to wait there while Jackie and I got dressed. By the time we both got showers, we came back downstairs to find Quinn and Mitchell had arrived. The boys looked a bit uncomfortable all sitting together, but no blood had been shed so that was a plus.
Mitchell and Quinn were on the couch and Will was in the recliner across from them. No one was talking, but silence was better than fighting. Jackie and I gave our boyfriends a kiss. Then we exchanged a look and, to make Will feel comfortable, we stepped up and kissed him on the cheek at the same time. That seemed to make him feel a little more at ease because he whistled and said “Two hot girls giving me cheek action, my day just got better.” Jackie and I grinned at the compliment, but it made Quinn roll his eyes at Will’s effort to flirt.
Well, we made it about two hours into our day before Will and Quinn got into it. No fist fighting or anything like that, they started a good-natured argument over whether Star Wars was the real trilogy or Lord of the Rings. Quinn was a bigger nerd than I could have ever imagined and he was on the side of Lord of the Rings. Will also tried to insult him by saying he was biased because he knew JRR Tolkien personally. To which Quinn rebutted, by saying he did have an original signed copy of The Hobbit that his father passed down to him.
Jackie and Mitchell utilized the time by making out and I sat there rolling my eyes and groaning periodically. To insert myself into the conversation, I finally blurted out, “Aragorn is hot. I could watch Viggo Mortensen all day. Of course, Ewan McGregor is hot too. Help me Obi-Wan, you're my only hope.” I finished the last line in a theatrical interpretation of Princess Leia with my hand dramatically pressed to my forehead with palm facing outward. They both looked at me like I had gone insane. At least I got them to stop talking about it. Score one for me.
Pizza arrived and we pigged out. Correction, the human girl and the two werewolves pigged out, the Vampires ate very little. Will got a text and excused himself for a few minutes. It seemed weird someone would be texting him. The fact that he even had a cell phone was news to me. Apparently no one knew because everyone else looked as puzzled as I did. “Does anyone have Will’s cell phone number?” I asked. Quinn laughed wholeheartedly, Jackie said she didn’t and Mitchell shook his head.
Will came back in the room a few minutes later. “When did you get a cell phone and why do none of us have your number?” I asked sounding like a jealous girlfriend.
“Sorry, I’ve had this for a while, my sister texts me on it to make sure I'm okay. No one else knows the number, but I can give it to you guys," he said. Well, now I felt like a douche. Of course, he would want to keep in touch with his sister; he ruined his life for her sake. It’s actually really sweet.
“Isn’t your sister like five? And she can send a text?” Quinn asked in a sarcasm filled tone.
I interjected in Will’s defense, “Three-year olds can text these days, you know how technologically advanced the younger generation is.” Now I sound like an old person. Nice.
Will stayed for a little bit. I could tell he felt like a fifth wheel when Jackie and Mitchell would steal a kiss or two or if Quinn and I were holding hands. The mood lightened when he left. Jackie and Mitchell excused themselves and went upstairs to their room leaving Quinn and me alone.
He sat on the couch with me and I lay my head down in his lap while we watched a movie. It wasn’t a very entertaining movie so I hit pause and look
ed up at Quinn. “Tell me about what happened after you were turned.” I sat up cross-legged on the couch. “How did you tell your parents what happened?”
He took my hand and caressed it gently, “I never told my parents.” His voice lowered and his eyes glazed over, “I never went home after that night. I was afraid of hurting them. I left town and never went back. That was sixty years ago. I know they're probably dead by now, but I don’t even know how they died, or when.”
Gently, I squeezed his hand in comfort as he went on, “I’ve been scared to go back home to find out what happened because there may be someone there that knew me. I’ve been contemplating it a lot here lately though. Seeing you with your parents…made me miss mine even more.” He had lowered his gaze.
I lifted his chin to look at me and smiled at him encouragingly, “So you were close with them?”
He released a sad sigh, “My parents made me who I am today, not the Vampire part naturally, but the…”
I finished his sentence for him, “the good man you are, the gentleman.”
He gave a slight nod before continuing, “They were the sweetest couple. They held hands all the time and one thing I thought was so cool is that they used to slow dance in the kitchen. When I was little, I would crawl between their legs when I caught them like that.”
His smile grew larger but illuminated the sadness underneath. “My dad would always reach down and grab me up tickling me and my mom would plant kisses all over my face.” The way he looked as he relayed this memory to me, made me yearn to meet his parents.
In my mind, I could see a beautiful woman wearing a sundress with an apron over it. I envisioned his father in a button down shirt and slacks, walking into the kitchen, taking her hand, and twirling her to him. He pulls her close and she smiles up at him with such incredible love in her eyes. As they get ready to kiss, the most precious child comes running in the room and crawls between their legs. He's swooped up and laughter erupts from all three of them. As I imagined this, I realized that their faces had changed in my mind and it was Quinn and I dancing with a little boy who had Quinn’s smile and my eyes. My heart hurt and his voice brought me back.
“He was a real gentleman. He held doors for her, waited to eat dinner until she was sitting down to eat too, he never treated her badly. He told me once that she was his world. He hoped I would find someone that made my heart race, someone whose warm touch was the only thing I needed to make the day better.” He brought my hand up to his face and kissed it, “Kind of ironic, my heart can’t ever race for you, but I still know that what I feel, is what he wanted for me, what he felt for my mom.”
A tear fell from my cheek. A tear that was for his parents, but also for the child I saw that will never come to be. I couldn’t bring that sad point up right now, “They sound like amazing people. One day, when you're ready to go and find out what happened to them, I’d like to be there for you.”
He kissed my forehead and the corner of his mouth turned up slightly. “They would've really liked you, Parker.” He reached over and grabbed my waist, pulling me to him. I sat on his lap and leaned my head against his. We sat there for a while like that, eventually I drifted off. When I woke up, Quinn was lying down on the couch and had me cradled on top of him with my head on his chest. The stairs creaked. I looked and saw Jackie sneaking downstairs in her pajamas. She waved her hand at me motioning to come meet her.
I met Jackie in the kitchen. She was, well… glowing. She smiled sheepishly and said, “We did it.”
I gasped and hugged her, “See, and it was great wasn’t it?”
She nodded excitedly. “He was so romantic and sweet too, Park. He was surprised that I decided to go through with it. He continuously made sure I was positive it's what I wanted. And he was so gentle with me…it was exactly how I imagined it would be.”
We chatted in the kitchen for a bit over a bowl of ice cream with sprinkles and hot fudge. Now pretty much the only thing we didn’t have in common was the fact that I'm a wolf and she isn’t. Of course, I could change that, one bite would do it. I can’t believe I just thought about that, what a good friend I am.
Jackie looked up at me and said, “What’s really so bad about being a wolf or a vampire?” That was a weird question to ask, I thought. It’s almost eerie the way she can seem to know what I am thinking at times.
“Well, it’s tremendously painful when you change into a wolf, I know that personally. You always have to manage your temper so that you don’t shift on the spot. You're terrified to tell anyone you love what has happened for fear they won’t accept you anymore. You age so slowly, which sounds great, but it means you'll watch everyone you love die. As for being a vampire, you have to drink blood to survive and you can’t always stop yourself from draining a person’s blood supply. Besides, look at Quinn and Will. They both lost everyone they cared about. Quinn just finished telling me about his parents. There's so much pain there from losing them and it’s been sixty years, Jackie.” It was my turn to question her intentions at this point, “Why are you asking me about this?”
Jackie looked down at her bowl and said, “I want to be like you or Mitchell. I don’t want to be the only ordinary one. I just can’t decide which I'd rather be.” I was stunned. I never expected Jackie to want to be either. I guess it made sense though. When all your friends are supernatural and have a long life ahead, do you really want to be the only one that gets old and dies in less than 100 years?
Quinn walked in the kitchen and he had a troubled look on his face. I guess he heard Jackie’s inquiry. He kissed my forehead and took a bite of my ice cream. I pulled my bowl back and said “Get your own!” and laughed.
He looked at Jackie and said, “You really want to change into a wolf or vampire? I’m sorry, I wasn’t eavesdropping. I woke up and heard part of the conversation as I was walking in. You know it’s not all glamorous as a Vampire. The hunger can burn like fire in your chest. If you're too exposed to the sun, your skin feels like it has electric tingles all over it. Without sunglasses, exposure to the sun causes your eyes to dry out and it seems as if someone is holding a lighter to them.”
Thinking back to the day in the park, I had moved his sunglasses to see what happened to his eyes. I felt terrible knowing I had caused him such pain to quench my curiosity.
“Then there's a thirst that can cause you to want to rip a person apart just to soothe it. You can lose control of yourself just by the sight or smell of fresh blood which puts everyone you love in danger. Even a finger prick can send your hunger into a frenzy.”
He stopped when he saw my face and the terror on it. “Quinn, you told me that Jackie was safe and Mitchell wouldn’t hurt her. Now you're saying he could lose control at any time?”
He grabbed mine and Jackie’s hands and said, “No, no, Mitchell won’t hurt anyone. That's what the tutoring is all about. I’ve been training him to control it, using the exercises that I've used over the years. I wouldn’t let him around either of you if I thought he was dangerous.”
I shook my head, “But Quinn, no offense, the reason Mitchell is a vampire is because you lost control even with years of training yourself.”
Quinn looked ashamed, “It was a weak moment, Parker; one that I won’t easily forgive myself for. Mitchell has proven that he is stronger than that though. The fact that he found Christine and controlled himself proved that to me. He won’t allow himself to get hungry, that was the mistake I made. I went too long without nourishment and that's why I couldn’t control myself when I came upon him in the woods. Plus, Mitchell has never fed on a human, he doesn’t have that memory of the way it feels like I do.” Both Jackie and I sighed in relief. I didn’t realize I'd been holding my breath until that moment.
“Did I hear my name?” Mitchell joined us in the kitchen. He walked over and whispered something in Jackie's ear which made her blush.
“The four of us do have somet
hing we need to figure out,” Quinn began. “We need to figure out what or who killed Christine in the woods. There's possibly a rogue vampire out there killing people and as long as they're out there, no one you care about is safe.” I’ve killed vampires before, okay so two, but still that's something. The concept of tracking this person down scared me though. It was clear it scared Jackie as well because Mitchell was trying to calm her down.
“Quinn, can we skip this talk for the rest of the evening and just have fun as friends, please?” I begged him.
“I’m sorry Parker, I know this is scary for you guys, but it has to be taken care of before anyone else dies.”
Quinn told us about how he and Mitchell had been patrolling the town to see if they could spot anyone that didn’t belong or seemed out of place, but they hadn’t had any luck so far. They wanted to use me next, as a sort of bait. Quinn was reluctant to mention it at first, but he knew I could handle myself. The plan was to have me search the woods where the body was found and sniff things out. Meanwhile, Mitchell and Quinn would trace my steps to make sure I stayed safe.
I would be a wolf when this goes down, which meant I would be literally sniffing someone out. The full moon was only a couple of nights away. It would be the first time I had shifted since I met Quinn. Mitchell and Quinn would have to keep their distance from me, because I still wasn’t sure how to completely control myself in wolf form. Wolf instinct was to destroy vampires. Jackie wasn’t keen with the idea because she was worried about me getting hurt and worried about me shifting after I told her how much it hurts. I reassured her that it gets a little easier every time and that since it was the time of the full moon I would shift regardless if the plan was in place or not. Once the details were ironed out, we took a break and went back to the living room to watch a movie and veg out. I curled up next to Quinn and nestled myself right against his side under his arm. He lay his head against mine and I was asleep before the opening credits finished.
It was dark out seemed like it was after midnight and I was walking in the woods. My nose sniffed the ground trying to find a particular scent. The night was eerily quiet, even for my wolf ears. I hear a branch break and whip around to see if someone is there. No one is in my line of sight, but I smelled the strongest scent. I took off running, tracking it. It was getting stronger by the minute and I knew it had to be a vampire. There is a shadow up ahead and as I got closer, it took shape into a human. I recognized the paleness of the skin and the smell now burning my nose. My only impulse was to pounce. I put my paws against his back to knock him over and bit a chunk out of his back. He turned over just in time for me to see the look of shock and despair in his eyes before he turned to dust….it was Quinn.
My body jerked up and I screamed. Quinn shot up and grabbed hold of me. My body shook and I grabbed him as tight as I could. “It was a nightmare, baby, just a nightmare. It's okay,” Quinn kept repeating to me over and over again.
I cried out, “I can’t do it, I can’t shift around you. I won’t.” He kept stroking my hair and holding me. “I don’t know how to control it. I don’t know how to keep from killing you. I'd never forgive myself for that. Please don’t make me do this.” His grip tightened on me. I think he was trying to make me stop shaking, but it seemed to be getting worse. This feeling was the most terrified I’d ever been from a dream.
A few minutes later, Jackie was beside me with a glass of water. She held the cup as I tried to drink some. She was pretty calm, especially in comparison to Quinn, who was whiter than usual for a dead guy. He looked apprehensive. I guess it isn’t the best way to wake up, someone screaming in your ear. Once I calmed down, I told them about the dream which caused me to get upset again. It was obvious Quinn didn’t know what to do to ease my worried mind. All he could do was squeeze me tighter.
Quinn and Mitchell left the room for a few minutes because Jackie asked to speak to me alone. She had an idea she wanted to share with me. “Change me, Parker. Let me be the werewolf that tracks that vampire. Then you'll be safe. You and Quinn can stay out of the way and you'll be fine.”
“There's no way, Jackie. I've been changing for two years now and I don’t know how to control myself. I can’t do that to you. You won’t know what you're doing and you could end up hurting someone and never forgive yourself, or me. Besides, you really want to take the chance that you could kill Mitchell?” She looked frustrated, but there was no way I could do that to my best friend.
“Parker, I'm tired of just being me. Everyone is something supernatural and extraordinary…”
I stopped her, “You are special…”
She stopped me with an angry rebuttal, “Don’t give me that 'you're special' crap, Parker. I don’t want some sappy story about me being your best friend slash sister. You know what I mean and what I want.”
This time I was the one raising my voice, “Being a werewolf doesn't make me special, Jackie. It’s a curse! I kill people and I could kill a friend or someone I love without meaning to. And a vampire? Do you think Mitchell or Quinn would choose that life? We seem like everything is okay because we've had time to deal with it and adjust to the fact that we can’t change it. But you have a choice…”
She interrupted me, “You're right, I have a choice and I choose to be like you. Why can’t I make that decision? It's my life and it's what I want! Do you think I can handle growing old in front of you guys, knowing that I would be slowly dying while you guys are still in your prime? It’s not fair to me or to you. You'll have to watch me die…can you do that?”
She hurled some of my worst nightmares in my face. One thing I try to refrain from thinking about was how I'll deal with watching everyone I love die. My voice lowered to a concerned tone, “Damn it Jackie, how do you know that any of us will even be together in a couple of years? You may meet someone new. We could drift apart. We don’t know that we'll be with Quinn and Mitchell. Right now I'd like to say we can spend forever with them. I can’t imagine losing you or Quinn, or Mitchell either. The harsh truth is life is full of unexpected twists and changes.” She raised her eyes over my shoulder and I turn to see what has caught her attention.
My timing has always been incredible. Mitchell and Quinn stood side by side in the doorway. They both had miserable looks on their faces at the thought we would all drift apart. “I’m sorry, guys. I don’t want to change Jackie. It’s not that I don’t have faith in what we have as couples or as friends. I love you both.” I turned and grabbed Jackie’s hand, “All three of you, I just want to be realistic. Things change, even if we don’t want them to,” I finished.
Mitchell spoke next, “I think Jackie has a point. You could teach her the rules just like Quinn taught me. Then we have plenty of time together.” Unbelievable. They're going to gang up on me on this.
“Do you realize that vampires live thousands of years and wolves only live hundreds at most? You'll both watch us die, regardless. We can’t all live together forever. It doesn’t work that way! You're asking me to take away her chance to have a real life, to have babies.” My voice cracked on the word babies and I could see it hit home for Quinn who was probably as surprised as I was that I had even thought about children.
“Not to mention, you're asking me to cause her immense pain. I know how it feels to shift, to feel my bones break and reform, to feel my face contort; my teeth extend breaking through my gums. The pain is excruciating. It gets easier with time, but it's still tremendous pain.” I watched their faces as I explained the feelings. Jackie’s reaction was shock and horror and Quinn’s was of grief and sadness.
“Is that what you want Jackie? Is that want you want for her Mitch? Because I don’t, I don’t wish this life for someone I love. Not to mention, I'm still figuring this out for myself. I'm not in a position to mentor anyone. I don’t even know if I'll be able to control myself around you guys. I could kill all of you!” I yelled. I couldn’t take
anymore of this right now. Quinn grabbed my arm and I jerked free from him. “I have to get out of here, I need to be alone right now, away from all of you,” I said as I grabbed my purse and jacket and walked out the door. No one came after me, they all knew I wouldn't want them to.
Driving probably wasn’t the best idea, but I took the car anyway. Typically, I do very little driving in town because everything is so close that it seems pointless to use the gas. This time I wanted to get as far away as I could. My texting tone went off about an hour after I left.
Quinn: When are you coming back? Worried about you, Love you.
I didn’t reply. I was far enough out of town that I pulled over at a rest stop and sat in the car to think.
Over an hour had passed and I got several more texts begging me to reply, then a couple of apology texts from Jackie. It’s cruel to let my loved ones think something happened to me so I texted them both back.
Me: I’m ok, just need a little time to myself, I will be home in a couple of hours. Love you guys.
The blaring music helped me focus my thinking. No answers had come to me about how to convince Jackie that I would never change her. Everything about this situation was confusing to me. If being a wolf meant that you had super powers and that you lived forever and that's it, I would change her without a second thought. The pain of shifting, the feeling like your body was ripping apart, the fear that this time it would be too much pain to handle; well I don’t wish that on my worst enemy. The one thing I wish is that I could show Jackie how bad it is so she would forget even wanting to be like me. Maybe there was a way, maybe she could become a vampire and the four of us could spend almost forever together. That would be easier on me because they would live past me and it would be three fewer people that I love dying in front of me. Ugh, again I sound so selfish.
The other thing that I never realized bothered me before is the fact that I'll never have children. For all I know, werewolves can have children, but I'm pretty sure that Vampires can’t and if my future doesn’t include Quinn, well, I don’t really want children either. Of course, that means that as long as Jackie stays with Mitchell, she'll never have a child either whether she stays human or not.
My hand unconsciously went to my stomach and I closed my eyes and visualized it expanding into a bump. Quinn with his cheek resting against my belly and planting kisses. I could hear him telling him or her how much he loved them and how much he loved their mommy. My mind flew forward seeing that little girl with red hair and vibrant green eyes running towards Quinn with her arms open and he swept her up into his arms and hugged her tightly.
The sound of a horn honking behind me pulled me from my daydream. It was a trucker leaving the rest area and I looked up to see where his attention was aimed when I saw a woman walking out of the restroom. She was elegantly dressed and seemed as though she was upset. She wiped her face with a tissue and sat down on a bench, placing her head in her hands. Sympathy pulled at me, causing me to get out of the car and go check on her.
“Excuse me, are you alright?” I asked her as I approached.
She looked up startled and a sad smile filled her face. “I’ve been better,“ she replied and then continued, “I lost my best friend.”
“I'm so sorry, what happened?”
She waved her hands signifying I was jumping to the wrong conclusion. “He isn’t dead or anything. It’s just that I started to have feelings for him and he acted like he felt the same, but I found him with another woman.”
She put her hands over her face and began crying again, “I feel like I am losing everything, How can he love her and not me? We've been friends since…well as long as I can remember. How can I sit by and watch him care for her?” She looked up at me and I wasn’t really sure what to say, but could tell she was seeking my advice.
“Well, if you love him and things are meant to be, they'll work out. But if I were you, I would fight for him, he was yours first…right?” I asked.
She smiled in response and said, “Yes, he definitely was, we were together for years before that tramp came along.” Her sentence finished with anger and the elegance she had demonstrated before was momentarily gone. I was taken aback by it and she noticed my retreat from her. “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to get so angry, it just hurts,” she said apologetically.
I felt sorry for her, but I was starting to feel a lot of anger radiating from her and it was becoming awkward to sit here. “I understand. I'm in love, for the first time in my life, and I know I would fight for him if anyone ever tried to come between us. I hope things work out for you,” I glanced at my phone to check the time, “but it’s getting late and I need to go. Good luck to you.” I touched her hand and jerked back when I felt how cold it was. “You should get inside somewhere, you're freezing,” I told her. She shivered and agreed.
When I reached the car, I turned to look back and she was gone. At least she took my advice and found shelter. I noticed the door to the restroom blowing in the wind so she must have run in there. My skin shivered, I rubbed my hands to warm them up and turned on the car and cranked up the heat. It was getting dark and I had let my friends worry about me long enough.
As I drove, I spotted something in the woods; it was barely a shadow it moved so fast. This was right around the spot I found Will. If that is a rogue vampire, then it's lucky I found him or he could've been his or her first victim. Pulling over, I got out and grabbed my flashlight out of the trunk. I walked toward the woods shining the light into the trees to see if I could see a face or anything to give us an idea of whether it was a man or woman.
Standing at the side of the road, I couldn’t see much, so I inched closer. I stopped and thought about all the horror movies I watched and how I would scream at the stupid teenage girl heading to check out the strange sound all on her own. Now I'm that stupid teenage girl. I turned off my flashlight and ran back to the car. As I drove back toward the house, I looked in my rearview and thought I saw another flash, a chill ran down my spine.
Quinn, Jackie and Mitchell were playing cards when I got home. I could see them in the window as I unlocked the door. Quinn wrapped me in his arms before I could shut the door behind me. He smelled like heaven. I held him as tight as I could, burying my face in his chest. I didn’t want to let go of the way this felt. Nothing seemed to be wrong with the world when I was in his arms.
“I was worried about you, I don’t like when you're upset,” Quinn said as he pulled back from the hug and ran his thumb along my face in a gentle caress. I was lucky to have him and it made me feel bad again for that poor woman I met, she was so heartbroken, I hope she gets her man.
He led me into the living room and I apologized for running out on them, Jackie spoke up, “It’s my fault, Parker. I didn’t consider the facts and I didn’t consider how it would make you feel. I'm so sorry.” We hugged and all was okay, at least for the moment.
Chapter Eleven
