Jackson (BBW Secret Baby Bear Shifter Romance) (Secret Baby Bears Book 3)

by Becca Fanning

  “I think I could live with that,” Rick said softly. “Alright, so, the Backbreaker was about twice as big as the Breakwater and dealt almost exclusively in the Outer Rim. I don’t think I saw a core planet until I was ten, and my mom ended up accidentally kidnapping a shop girl. See, she’d gone in to look for spare parts…”

  The combination of the stars rushing past them and Rick’s voice did what reading and breathing exercises hadn’t managed, and Zosha felt herself drifting off. At some point and indeterminable amount of time later, she felt a soft, warm pressure on the top of her head. When she didn’t move away, the pressure began to move down the length of her hair, lightly at first and then with more confidence. Zosha sighed happily and let the feeling of Rick running his fingers through her hair push her that final step into sleep.

  She was, distantly, aware of fading in and out of consciousness, bursts of awareness of the glow of the screen and the sounds of the ship and, always, of the feeling of Rick’s hand in her hair.

  “You’re gonna wind up outside my door begging to keep her, aren’t you?” she thought she heard someone say at one point.

  “She’s not a dog, Leo,” Rick answered.

  “Says the one petting her,” the captain snorted. “Anyways, you’re in luck. Annie likes her and, more importantly, Annie thinks she might be useful.”

  “Useful how?” Rick asked, his voice suddenly something hard and sharp.

  “Ease up. It doesn’t involve giving her to Lan Doro. Annie’s working on convincing the others to see it her way. If she’s successful, which looking back on her track record I’m inclined to think she will be, there’ll be another meeting. Consider this a heads up.”

  “And whatever Annie’s thinking won’t put her in danger?”

  “No more than she already is. Actually, Annie’s hoping we can solve one of our problems by solving hers. Why, were you planning on finally going on that killing spree if I said yes? Because as someone who’s been your friend for five years and your captain for six, I’m going to feel pretty offended if you throw me over for someone you’ve known for a handful of hours.”

  “Don’t be stupid, of course not. But I do think she’s worth protecting.”

  “I know the feeling. I’ll call you when Annie manages to glare Hyde and Dominic into submission.”

  “She’s not worried about Custer?”

  “Since when has anyone ever cared about Custer’s opinion on anything? Besides, he likes her.”

  Rick sighed. “I was afraid that would happen.”

  The captain chuckled. “Don’t worry, he’s not edging in on your territory. Anyways, I need to go make sure Dom and Hyde haven’t gotten offensive enough that Annie’ll be forced to retaliate. Try not to crash.”

  “Fuck off.”

  Zosha was aware on some level that she had just heard something important, but she wasn’t aware enough to figure out why it was important or why she should care. Instead she slipped back under.

  The next time she woke up it was because Rick was shaking her. She blinked up at him.

  “Wusshappenin?” she asked.

  “Congratulations, that was almost a real word. I need you to get up now. Annie has a plan.”

  Zosha tried and failed to will her legs to work, then looked plaintively up at Rick. He sighed, a warm look in his eyes, and hauled her to her feet.

  “How did you manage to escape from a villainous mastermind on your own, exactly?” He asked as she leaned into him, stretching out a few aches and adjusting to being on her feet.

  “I wasn’t alone. And Lan Doro isn’t a mastermind. And I am stealthy and amazing,” she told him, forming her words precisely as the fog of sleep slowly cleared out of her mind.

  “I mean I’d go with ‘you’re lucky that you’re pretty,’ but sure let’s go with that,” Rick answered. Zosha cycled through reactions to that, from offended to teasing to nonchalant, before focusing on the important bit.

  “You think I’m pretty?” she asked with a sleep-drunk smile, batting her eyelashes at him.

  “Haven’t kicked you out of bed yet, have I? Or the cockpit, for that matter.”

  “’Cause you know I’d kick you in the cockpit if you tried.”

  “Almost flawless comeback, that. Points off for there not actually being a pit near my cock.”

  “There will be if you try anything, just ask Custer,” Zosha said.

  Rick laughed and began pulling her towards the kitchen. “Alright, then, I’ll be a perfect gentleman.”

  “Nope, too late, you already told me about the Great Brothel Escape,” she told him.

  “And there goes the sterling reputation I’ve spent years polishing,” he said. Suddenly, his face fell. “Zosha, I just want you to know that everything is going to be okay.”

  It seemed like a silly thing to say out of the blue, and Zosha was confused until the conversation she’d thought she dreamed came back in fragments. She was suddenly much more awake.

  “Oh, God, they’ve decided what to do with me,” she said.

  “Yes, they have,” Rick said soothingly. “And they’re going to help you. I need you to trust me. Can you do that, just for ten minutes?”

  Looking in those warm, golden eyes, Zosha thought she could trust him for a lot longer than ten minutes. She nodded and followed him the rest of the way to the kitchen.

  The others were already sitting around the table when Zosha and Rick arrived, a sense of déjà vu sweeping over her. There were two chairs open across from where the captain was sitting, Annie leaning on his back with her arms around his shoulders, and Rick sat down comfortably, Zosha following suit after a second of hesitation.

  “Alright, so,” Captain Ingram began, “the brilliant love of my life has had an idea. I, personally, think it’s a damn good one, and these chucklefucks,” he gestured at Dominic, Hyde, and Custer, “apparently agree enough that they’re willing to consider it. If you think you can do your part.”

  The captain looked up and locked eyes with Annie, who nodded. She straightened up, leaning an elbow on Ingram’s shoulder, and addressed the room.

  “So, it seems to me what we have here is a thief with a ledger and an asteroid locked in a civil war,” she said. “And, of course, what we’ve always had: our job. It seems to me there’s a way to combine those.

  “Stop me, Zosha, if I get any of this wrong. After Strathmore’s long overdue demise, the Rahm brothers split and began fighting each other for control of Lytos. You had the misfortune of pickpocketing the wrong man. Lan Doro, something of a supplier to the younger Rahm, had a notebook detailing the U4 trade he was running. This notebook is now in your possession. Yes? Good. Now, I know all of you know what U4 is and exactly how much you can make smuggling it because we’ve been on the lookout for an opportunity to get in on the game. And this,” Annie said, pointing at Zosha, “is that opportunity.”

  “How so?” asked Hyde.

  “We know what all three parties involved in this want. Zosha wants to get rid of the notebook and make it out of this safely. We want in on the U4 trade. And the older Rahm wants his brother out of the way.”

  “Wait,” Zosha interrupted. “When did Sylas Rahm get involved?”

  “We’re involving him,” Annie said, the steel back in her eyes, “because it’s the best way to tie up several loose ends. If we destroy or otherwise wash our hands of the notebook, Lan Doro still wants Zosha dead because he can’t let her live after reading it or give her the chance to tell his boss that he let it be stolen. If we take it to the younger Rahm brother, then we have to go into Lan Doro’s territory and we run the risk of him getting to Zosha before we reach our goal. And little brother already has a supplier.

  “But if we take it to the older brother—Sylas, right? I was beginning to wonder if they had first names—then three things happen. The first is that Zosha gets rid of the notebook, but in a way that earns her the protection of someone powerful. I’m sorry, I know you didn’t want to choose sides, but that
’s life. The second is that Sylas unbalances his brother’s empire, probably enough to guarantee him victory. As a result of that, I’d wager that either the little brother kills Lan Doro in revenge or Sylas kills him for being one of his brother’s men, which takes care of that. And last, Sylas Rahm, soon to be in charge of one of the most infamous asteroids of iniquity, finds himself without a U4 supplier, but with a crew of smugglers who have already proven their loyalty to him, aided by one of Lytos’ most talented thieves.”

  “So what you’re saying is, essentially, you want to use Zosha as a battering ram to get into the U4 trade?” Dominic asked.

  “Pretty much. Although I would like to remind you that, hopefully, we take care of her problems as well,” Annie replied. “So, you in?”

  “I have a choice?” Zosha asked, because she was still processing the fact that this could work, that she could be free. Under the table, Rick grabbed her hand and squeezed.

  “It’s more that we don’t have a choice in letting you have a choice,” Annie said. “You’re the one with the notebook, and this would work best if you were the one presenting this all to Sylas. This doesn’t exactly hinge on you being on board, but it would help a hell of a lot if you were.”

  Zosha considered that for a moment, then stood slowly. “I think I need a moment. I’ll be right back.”

  She walked out of the kitchen, her feet carrying her back to the cockpit. She sat in Rick’s chair, pulling her knees up to her chin and wrapping her arms around herself. Breathe in, breathe out.

  “Europa, Ganymede, Io, Callisto, Amalthea, Ananke,” she muttered. “Pasiphae, Carme, Thebe, Metis, Adrastea…”

  She’d gotten to Hegemone before Rick walked in.

  “I’ll be honest, I thought you’d be a little happier about this,” he said.

  “I can’t let myself be,” she said without looking at him. “I can’t do this.”

  “What do you mean?” he asked. “You’ve already come so far on your own.”

  “I already told you, I wasn’t alone,” she told him, refusing to let her voice break. “And you mean I’ve already run so far. That’s all I’m good for, you know. Grabbing something I think I can get a decent price for later and then hightailing. And it works, because I’ve always been faster than whoever’s chasing me. But making a stand? I can’t do that. I mean, look at me. I’m all bluster and bluff to cover up the fact that I’m a wreck who can’t even control her own life.” She wiped her nose on the back of her hand. “You should have just let Hyde airlock me.”

  “Hey, look at me,” Rick said, kneeling down next to her. After a moment, she complied. “You can do this, and you won’t be alone. You’ll have five bear shifters backing you up. I mean, we took out Strathmore. This is going to be easy.”

  Zosha nodded, trying to let herself be reassured. There was still one stubborn little worry that refused to dissipate.

  “And then what?” she asked. “I already told you, I don’t want to take sides. I can’t live like that, knowing there might be a target on my back because of who I work for. I’d go insane. The only thing I can think of is to leave Lytos for good, but where would I go?”

  Even on the run, she’d always imagined that one day, the dust would settle and she would be able to return to her asteroid. She hated living there, with the stink and the violence and the feeling that she’d never be anything more than she was, but the thought of never getting to live there again was surprisingly painful.

  “You’d go anywhere you wanted,” Rick answered. “I mean, you lived your whole life on that hellhole. If you can survive Lytos, you can survive anywhere.”

  This was a lie; being able to survive on Lytos meant that Zosha could survive on Lytos, or places like it. It meant she could sleep with one eye open, always on guard. It meant her fight-or-flight response, firmly weighted on the side of flight, had a hair trigger that had saved her life more than once but would never let her feel at home anywhere properly civilized. Rick knew it as well as Zosha did, but it was better than no reassurance at all and she allowed him to lead her back to the kitchen.

  Hyde and Dominic looked unimpressed by her reentrance, but she ignored both them and Custer’s smirk in favor of addressing the captain and Annie.

  “I’m in,” she told them. “I think you’re crazy for wanting to do this, but I’m in.”

  Annie smiled. “Glad to have you on board.”

  The next hour passed in a frenzy of planning that consisted mostly of Annie convincing the others they could just shift from the get-go and kill anyone who tried to get in their way and picking Zosha’s brain for information. Once she had drilled everyone’s script into their minds to her satisfaction, she declared the meeting disbanded and told the crew members to return to their duties and Zosha to rest up.

  Zosha had the alarming thought that if Annie and Spinner ever met each other, they would either kill each other or take over the galaxy.

  The captain and Rick shared a long look that ended in the captain walking to the cockpit and Rick walking Zosha back to his room.

  “He’ll fly us in. At warp 8, it should take twelve hours,” Rick told her as he keyed in the passcode to his room.

  “Three and a half weeks of switching ships and hopping city to city and asteroid to dwarf planet to space station to get away from Lytos,” she told him, “and twelve hours to get back. It doesn’t seem right.”

  “That shouldn’t be new,” he responded. “Annie was right, though. You only got about an hour and a half of sleep in the cockpit, you really should lay back down.”

  Zosha couldn’t think of anything else to do, so she fell back on the mattress.

  “How are you feeling?” Rick asked her, shoving the papers on his desk into stacks.

  “I think I’m actually so terrified I can’t even feel it anymore,” she answered. “You?”

  “Eh. A little itchy from anticipation. Concerned about little Rahm’s defenses. Happy that your shit is getting figured out.”

  “So is yours,” Zosha pointed out. Rick walked over and sat beside her, leaning back on the headrest.

  “Happy about that too,” he said and put one hand gently on the crown of her head. She relaxed as he began running his fingers through her hair again. “Now, get some sleep.”

  She closed her eyes, certain she wouldn’t be able to get a wink of sleep, and woke up eleven and a half hours later to Custer yelling over the intercom for Rick to get his ass in gear.

  Rick moaned from where he’d passed out beside her and propped himself up on his elbows. They locked eyes and he gave her a crooked grin.

  “Let’s go finish a war, shall we?” he said, and for the first time Zosha really, truly felt like this might just work out.

  They gathered in the cargo bay. Dominic and Annie were staying behind. Rick and Zosha were splitting away from Captain Ingram, Hyde, and Custer to avoid drawing too much attention and then meeting back up at a rendezvous point after forty minutes. From there on, it was all a matter of getting into Sylas Rahm’s compound.

  Rick and Zosha headed out first. She took him down to her favorite sweetbread vendor and they trailed around the marketplace, waiting for the appointed time.

  Zosha remembered Spinner haggling with a tech vendor for the only decent monitor in the shop when they were barely in their twenties, his eyes narrow and lips thinned with impatience, and suddenly she missed him so much it hurt. She didn’t want to walk into what might be her death without saying goodbye to him.

  She tugged on Rick’s sleeve and told him she’d be right back, then dashed into the nearest bathroom and pulled out her comm. She didn’t think she had time to call him, on the off chance he picked up, and she didn’t want to tell him face to face that, despite all his help, she could still very well be about to get herself killed. The habit to run away was, apparently, not something that could be kicked all at once.