by E. L. Todd
The relationship with Fernan returned to normal, but the emotion still hung between them. He didn’t touch her or embrace her at work, but he still gave her that look he always did.
“How are you?” he asked when he grabbed the mail from her desk.
“I’m okay.”
He sorted through the envelopes and tossed aside all the junk mail. “Would you like to go out for dinner tonight? There’s a new Indian place that just opened. I’ve heard nothing but good things.”
“Not tonight,” she said. “Maybe tomorrow.”
“Sounds good,” he said.
She sorted through the email on the computer and avoided his gaze.
“How is your recovery coming along?” he asked.
She shrugged. “No progress.”
“And how did Toby take the break up?”
She sighed. “Not well. We ended on bad terms.”
“With his personality, I’m not surprised.” He opened a few checks then placed them inside the moneybag. “You’re better off without him.”
“Maybe…” She didn’t feel that way. In fact, she felt horrible for hurting him. The look in his eyes was a sight she’d never forget.
He placed his hand over hers. “It’ll get better. I promise.” He patted her gently then walked upstairs.
She thought about Toby for the rest of the day, wondering how hurt he was. She seemed to hurt everyone around her. She was like a poison, withering everything she came into contact with.
When the workday was over, she and Fernan walked to the curb. He didn’t hold her like he usually did. He respected her distance and gave her the space she asked for.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” he said.
“Okay.”
“Bye.” He got inside his limo and the driver shut he door.
Abby walked to her apartment then kicked off her heels as soon as she walked inside. They were unbearable on her feet, but she still wore them anyway. She wasn’t sure why.
A knock on the door made her sigh. She wasn’t expecting company, so she assumed it was Paul. He was a total mess and could hardly function on his own. When she opened the door, she was surprised to see Toby on the other side. She froze while she stared at his beautiful face. He was wearing running shorts and a t-shirt. Her mouth remained closed, unsure what to say.
“Why aren’t you dressed?” he asked.
She thought she hadn’t heard him right. “What?”
“Our training….you’re lucky you have your looks.”
“We’re still doing that?”
“Why wouldn’t we?” he asked. “A deal’s a deal.”
“Yeah…”
“Well, hurry up. I have somewhere to be afterwards.” He put his earplugs in and stood in the hallway.
She closed the door then got dressed. After she put on her sports gear, she met him in the hallway. Toby played with his ipod and kept quiet. He hardly looked at her.
“How’s Paul?” he asked.
“He’s doing okay.” She felt awkward just being around him. It was like their last conversation never happened.
“Should I be concerned? He seemed a little hung over today at work.”
“Oh.” She didn’t know if she should cover for him. “We had a few drinks last night.”
When they reached his gym, Toby didn’t open the door for her like he usually did. He immediately went to the weight room then grabbed his supplies. “Let’s do some bench presses.” He grabbed the bar and positioned it on the rack.
“Will I be doing weight lifting in the Tough Mudder?” she asked incredulously.
“No, smartass. But you need to be toned. Right now, you’re just skinny.”
‘Thanks,” she said sarcastically.
“I don’t give a shit if I hurt your feelings.” He nodded to the bench. “Lay down.”
She moved under bar then grabbed it.
“Make sure you grip it like this so you don’t strain your wrist. Now lift the bar.”
“Toby, it’s heavy…”
“I’m spotting you. I won’t let it fall.”
She tried to lift it but the bar didn’t move. “I can’t.”
“Yes, you can. I don’t want to hear you say that again.”
“It’s physically too heavy for me,” she snapped. “If I said I can’t do it, I can’t do it.”
He gripped her arms then glared at her. “You will do this. I will hold you down to this bench until you change your mind.” He loosened his grip. “Now lift the fucking bar.”
She glared at him.
“I have all night.”
She tightened her fingers on the bar then pushed up. When the bar wobbled then lifted, she was surprised it was in the air. Toby’s hand hovered under the bar, able to catch it if he had to.
“Now do five reps.”
“Five?” she asked incredulously.
“Do you have a hearing problem?” he snapped.
“Do you have an asshole problem?” She immediately realized how much they were arguing. Their constant bickering moved back and forth, like a ball in a tennis match. She stared to realize he was right—their chemistry was strong.
“You would have done it already if you weren’t busy making excuses.”
She took a deep breath then bent her elbows. It moved down to her chin then she held it for a second. Her arms shook with the force to push it back up.
“You got it, Abby.”
She released the air from her lungs then pushed up.
“Good. Now four more.”
“Damn…”
“Come on. The sooner you do it, the sooner it’ll be over.”
She clenched her teeth. “Uh, I hate you.”
“I hate you too. Now shut up and do it.”
She lowered the bar and raised it up again. “I can’t do anymore.”
“Yes, you can.”
“Toby, take the bar.”
He raised his hands. “You’re on your own.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
“I know you can do it,” he said firmly. “I believe in you.”
The sweat dripped down her forehead. She breathed through her nose then out her mouth then finished the set. As soon as her arm came back up, he took the bar and racked it.
“I knew you could do it.”
She sat up then slapped him across the face. “Don’t ever pull that shit again.”
He rubbed his cheek gently then dropped his hand. The annoyance was bright in his eyes. “I was trying to push you.”
“Well, don’t.” She turned away.
Toby grabbed her by the forearm and yanked her back. “If I hadn’t done it, you wouldn’t have finished the set.”
“Who cares?”
“It’s not just about the set, Abby. If you can push through that, you can push through anything. It’s called building your confidence. And you’re welcome by the way.” He dropped his hand then walked to the next machine. “Now get in.”
She stared at the odd apparatus. “I don’t even know what the hell that is.”
“That’s why I’m here, brat.”
She stood inside the leg machine then leaned back. Toby adjusted the weights. “Do two sets of five.”
As soon as Abby bent her knees, she realized how heavy it was.
Toby eyed her. “The sooner you do it, the sooner it will be over.”
“I’m training for the Tough Mudder, not the Olympics.” She breathed heavily as she finished the set.
“You should be in the best shape either way.” He crossed his arms over his chest and watched her.
When she finished, she stepped out and bent at the waist, trying to catch her breath. She’d never been so exhausted in her life.
“Toby?”
Abby looked up at the name.
“Hey, Roxy,” Toby said with a smile. “How are you?”
“Tired,” she said. “I hate coming here, but I’m so glad I do when I leave.” She wore spandex shorts and a sports bra. Her body was h
ard and defined, and her tits were so big they looked fake. Abby felt like a fatass compared to her. “Do you have any plans tomorrow?”
“No,” Toby said. “But I hope I will soon.”
She smiled. “Be at my place at seven.”
He nodded. “Will do.”
She rubbed his chest before she walked away. She picked up the bar and started doing dead lifts. Her ass faced them.
Abby looked at Toby and saw him gawking at her ass as she bent over.
“Excuse me?”
“Huh?” He still didn’t look away.
“You’re training me. Remember?”
“I thought you were passing out?” He drank from his water bottle while he watched her move up and down.
“You’re a pig.”
“What?” he snapped. “I’m a single guy and I can look at whoever I want.” He closed his water then walked to the next machine. “I don’t give a shit if you think I’m a pig.”
She rolled her eyes then finished the next set like instructed. Toby watched her while she held the weights, but any time she wasn’t doing something, he was glancing at the blonde across the room. It really pissed off Abby.
When they were finished with their workout, Toby flirted with the girl before he walked out. It seemed like they already knew each other.
“Have you already slept with her?” Abby blurted.
“That’s a personal question.” He drank from his water bottle.
When they reached the sidewalk, she glared at him. “Are you really going to sleep with her?”
He shrugged. “It depends on her mood.”
She crossed her arms over her chest and felt the jealousy course through.
“Well, I’ll see you tomorrow.” He nodded to her then turned the opposite way of her apartment.
“Wait.”
He sighed then turned around. “What?”
“You aren’t going to walk me home…?”
“Why would I?” The anger in his eyes could be seen even a mile away.
“You always do.”
“But you don’t mean anything to me anymore.” He turned around again. “Goodnight, Abby.”
“Wait,” she said again.
“What?” he snapped. He turned around and glared at her. “What?”
“Please walk me home.”
“No. This is what you wanted, Abby. You don’t get to have both.” He left her on the sidewalk and disappeared into the crowd. Seeing him walk away shredded her heart to pieces, infinite pieces. She took a deep breath then walked back to her apartment, all alone.
When she walked inside, she lay on the couch and curled into a ball. She didn’t know what was wrong with her. Seeing Toby walk away burned her painfully. Why did she feel this way? She wished it would go away.
The knock on the door made her jump. She immediately ran to it, knowing Toby had returned to apologize. He always said things he didn’t mean but then he asked for forgiveness. When she opened the door and saw Paul, disappointment flooded through her.
He gripped his skull then wobbled on his feet. He was clearly drunk. “Can I sleep here?”
She swallowed the lump in her throat. The devastation shocked her. She didn’t realize how much Toby meant to her until he was gone. “Yeah…come in.”
He came inside then immediately went to her room. He lied on the covers and fell asleep. Abby watched him for a long time before she cooked dinner and set aside a plate for him. But Paul seemed to be out.
After watching TV alone for hours, she went to bed. Paul stayed on his side, completely knocked out. She studied his face, seeing the wrinkles everywhere. He was more depressed than she realized. After thinking about Toby, she fell asleep.
At three in the morning, a loud knock rang on the wood. It was loud enough to wake up Paul too. They both sat up in bed at the sound. Abby blinked a few times before she realized what was happening. Paul sat beside her, his shirt off. Sweat covered his chest and neck.
The knock rang again. It immediately made Abby frightened. She didn’t know who would bang on her door in the middle of the night, especially with such force. She got to her feet then moved to the door.
Paul stood up. “Abby, I got it.”
“Are you sure?”
He wiped the sleep from his eyes. “Are you expecting anyone?”
“No…”
He walked to the front door. Abby stayed in the living room, her cell phone gripped in hand. Paul looked through the peephole. “What the hell?”
“Who is it?” Abby asked.
Paul opened the door. “Is everything okay?”
Abby moved forward so she could see the culprit.
Alexandra had her bag over her shoulder, and tears streamed down her face. She looked shaken up, like something devastating had happened to her. When she stared at Paul, she gasped. Then she looked at Abby. “You fucking tramp.”
“What?” Abby and Paul both said at the same time.
“You’ve been fucking my ex this entire time?” Alexandra looked at her sister with a look of disgust. “Fuck you, Abby.”
“No!” Abby moved past Paul. “It’s not how it looks. I would never do that to you. Come on, Alex.”
She stormed away. “What kind of sister does that?” She wiped her tears away. “Don’t ever talk to me again. I mean it. You obviously need the attention of three different guys just to survive. Take him. I don’t want him.” She ran down the hallway.
Abby moved to chase after her, but Paul held her back.
“Let her go.”
“No,” Abby snapped. “I have to talk to her.”
“She’s too upset to see reason. Wait until tomorrow.”
“How can I?” she asked. “My sister thinks I betrayed her.”
“We’ll clear it up in the morning.” Paul grabbed his shirt then darted out the door. “But I have to make sure she’s safe. Why would she come to your apartment at three in the morning?”
“I have no idea.”
Paul ran down the hallway. “I have to find out.”
Abby watched him go, feeling her world cave in on itself.
Chapter Ten
“What happened?” Abby jumped up when Paul returned.
He shook his head. “I couldn’t find her. She disappeared.”
“Fuck.” Abby grabbed her phone and called her. There was no answer.
“Call Blaise,” Paul said. “He should be able to get a hold of her.”
“But what if she doesn’t want him to know she came here?”
“What’s more important?” Paul asked. “Her secret or her safety?”
Abby sighed then made the call.
Blaise answered immediately. “What?” He was clearly in a bad mood.
“Is Alex there?”
“No,” he snapped. “Is she there?”
“No…”
“Fuck.”
“What’s going on, Blaise?” she asked.
“We had a fight and she stormed out. I assumed she was going to your place.”
“Well, she did come here,” Abby said. “But she left.”
“What? Why did she leave?”
“Uh…we just had an argument.” Abby didn’t want to mention Paul.
“Do you know where she went?” he asked frantically.
“No. I was hoping you could call her.”
“She probably won’t answer.”
“Just try,” she begged.
“Okay,” he said. “I’ll call you back.” He hung up.
Abby lowered the phone and sighed. “How did this happen?”
“I’m a little hurt she assumed we were sleeping together.”
“That makes two of us,” she snapped.
“But it did look pretty bad…”
“It doesn’t matter,” Abby said. “She should have listened to me before she jumped to conclusions.”
Paul put his hands in pockets. “Did they break up…?”
“No, Paul. That’s never going to happen. Stop your wishful
thinking.”
He sighed. “I was just wondering.”
“Well, stop wondering.”
He gripped his skull. “I’m so mad right now. She should be with me. She wouldn’t be running around if I hadn’t lost her.”
“Stop playing “what if”.” Her phone rang and she answered it immediately. “Did you talk to her?”
“She didn’t answer,” Blaise said. “But I’m leaving the apartment right now. I left her a message and told her to come back because I wouldn’t be around. I hope she takes the bait.”
“I’m still worried,” Abby said.
“I am too.”
Abby sighed. “Call me if you hear anything.”
“I will.” He hung up.
Abby put down the phone, but the screen lit up. Toby was calling her. And she had no idea why. She answered it.
“Hello?”
“Your sister is staying with me tonight. I just wanted to let you know.”
“What? She is?”
“She asked me not to tell you, but I did it anyway. Because I’m an asshole.”
She gripped her chest. “Thank god.”
“What’s going on, Abby?”
“She didn’t tell you?”
“No,” he said. “She went into my room and slammed the door. She said she didn’t want to talk about it.”
“Paul spent the night and she came over. When she saw us together, she assumed the worst.”
He was quiet for a moment. “It seems like he’s sleeping over there pretty often.”
Abby wasn’t sure what he meant. She wondered if he was about to explode in a rage. “Not really. He was just too drunk to go home.”
Toby moved the phone to the other ear. “Well, she’s staying here tonight. I’ll make sure she gets home in the morning.”
“Can I come over?” she blurted.
“No,” he said firmly. “Just leave her alone. She’s delirious. I can still hear her crying, even down the hall.”
That broke Abby’s heart. “I wish she would talk to me.”
“I’m sure you guys can straighten it out tomorrow.”
“Yeah…”
“Well, goodnight.”
“Thank you, Toby—for calling.”
“I wish you’d do the same for me.” He hung up.
The last insult stung her. She dropped the phone on the couch.
“What’s going on?” Paul asked.
“She’s staying with Toby.”
