by N. Michaels
I try to lightly push him away, but it’s as effective as pushing away a steel wall.
“Maybe I’m hungry for something else entirely.” Mr. Miller whispers, his breath fanning out on my lips.
All I can think about is ripping his clothes off and having him right here, on the damn floor. But I gather every ounce of self-control and tip my head back, closing my eyes.
“Please, stop. Stop playing with me.” I whisper.
Why is he doing this? He keeps telling me to act professional and then he presses me against the door. Make up your mind!
Immediately, Mr. Miller freezes and slowly moves away from me. Even though my body is revolting at his absence, my mind is calming me and reassuring me that this is the right thing to do. To push him away like this, even though all I want is to have him in anyway that I can.
I feel Mr. Miller’s warm hand cupping my cheek.
“Look at me, Katherine.” He says with such tenderness, his words are like a genuine caress.
I open my eyes, finding Mr. Miller’s face is inches away from mine, close but not touching. His eyes delve deeply into mine and he looks as if he’s lost in them.
“You have the most extraordinary eyes I’ve ever seen.” Mr. Miller murmurs quietly and I frown slightly at his compliment.
Mr. Miller inhales deeply then takes a few steps back.
“Don’t go anywhere before letting me know first and get me something good from Wolfgang’s.” his face is back to its normal state, his cryptic mask.
“Of course. Right away, Mr. Miller.” I control my voice, wanting to get out of this awkward situation.
Mr. Miller’s words haunted me on my drive back home from work.
‘Maybe I’m hungry for something else entirely’ … ‘You have the most extraordinary eyes I’ve ever seen’.
How am I going to survive this? Working for a man that leaves me so defenseless, it took everything in my power to push him away when that was the last thing I ever wanted to do.
No, You are strong. You can do this. He’s just a man, a player.
Why would Mr. Miller behave this way if he’s telling me there is no way we’ll ever be anything else but employer/employee as long as I work for him?
Confusion takes hold of me and I can’t seem to shake it off. Mr. Miller’s mixed signals are throwing me off. I am so out of my element.
Maybe I should quit? But how will I support myself?
These pesky questions occupy me throughout my drive. When I reach my building, I still don’t have any answers. No idea how to maneuver in these uncharted waters. I park in my usual spot and decide to leave those thoughts back in the car.
I walk in to find the apartment empty and a note from Laura on the kitchen island. She went to her weekly book club meeting and dinner is in the oven, Eggplant Parmesan.
Yum!
After a quiet dinner and a quick shower, I went over my assignments for tomorrow. Half way through, my cellphone chirped up. I unlocked the screen and read the text message from Nick:
TAO. This Friday. 8 p.m.
This message will destroy itself after 3 seconds… 3, 2, 1…
Well, actually you’ll have to destroy it. :P
See you then. DON’T. BE. LATE.
Giggling, I text him back saying I will be there.
I still remember the day I introduced Julia and Nick in high school. How they clicked immediately and from that day on, they’ve never been apart. It’s disgustingly sweet.
Nick is one of the leading financial advisers in New York City. His services are on demand around the world, but he would never forget Julia. He’ll bring her along and if that isn’t possible, he always finds the opportunity to spend time with her, even if it’s just for half an hour.
Something wet drops on top of my chest and I realized I’m crying. Understanding hits me like a kick to the gut. Longing. That’s what that hurt was. How I long for something like that. Something real. A relationship based on truth and honesty, mutual respect and admiration and above all else, unconditional love. Loving them one hundred percent, good and bad. Loving someone one so fiercely, you feel incomplete without them. As if a part of your soul is missing.
I’ve never had that with any of my former boyfriends. I’ve never even noticed that until recently. Not until I met Mr. Miller. The sheer power of my longing for him, to have him is overwhelming me. I’ve dreamt about a thousand different scenarios where we just date, love and have that type of rare connection Nick and Julia have. But in the end, I know that’s all it will ever be, just fantasies, just my own wishful wanting.
I wipe my tearstained cheeks and shake off the sudden sadness that nestled in my heart. There is nothing I can do about it. Quitting is not an option so I don’t need to sit here and waste my time crying. I got work to do… God, I’ve never thought those words would ever leave my mouth.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Mr. Miller’s schedule kept me busy and tired and before I even knew it, the week had flown by. I am no longer needed to accompany him to meetings since we’re back to New York, yet I still find him looking at me from time to time through the glass wall. I let those heated stares slide and focus on work. I won’t be played with. If Mr. Miller can’t be with an employee why tease me?
One thing I do notice is the more I fight my urge to cave to him, the more attention he gives me. And if that doesn’t scream player, I don’t know what will.
Maybe I should keep this up? He is bound to crack eventually…
No. I must not give myself a shred of hope… but if this does work miraculously - without the slightest assistance from my part - the victory will be ten times sweeter. But Mr. Miller keeps it professional. Apart from looking at me like I’m water and he’s a parched man, he doesn’t do much else. He keeps our conversations work related and has stopped teasing me, which allowed me to relax more and focus better on my work.
A knock on my office door startles me from the report I was typing.
“Come in.” I call out.
Julia walks in holding a black shopping bag with big white letters spelling, ‘CHANEL’ on it.
“Here, Nick’s gift.” She smiles.
“Thank you! He’s the best!” I beam and take the bag from her. “I’ll call him later to thank him.” I whisper and kiss Julia on the cheek.
Julia nods and walks out, leaving me with a new CHANEL purse. I risk a quick glance at Mr. Miller’s direction and find him standing in front of his floor-to-ceiling window, looking down at the busy streets of Midtown. I can only see his profile but from what I tell, he’s deep in thought. His strong arms are crossed and his back is tense. Worry flutters in my chest and I feel the sudden urge to go to him and comfort him, to ease his mind that whatever it is that’s bothering him will pass. Instead, I fight it. I force my eyes away from Mr. Miller’s tense body and go back to work. Mr. Miller is not my boyfriend. He’s my boss.
Thursday, the day before Julia’s surprise party, is the day I finally reunite with Milan and Vera.
I used my lunch break to join them in the hunt to find something classy and sexy. We ended up in SoHo, our favorite area to shop.
“What about this one?” Vera asks, holding a hanger with a pale pink dress.
“Looks cute.” Milan and I answer in unison.
“I don’t want cute! I want sexy!” she whines, flickering her dark brown hair behind her shoulder.
“Well, if you want sexy, stop picking clothes I wore when I was ten.” Milan teases.
I pull a hanger with a simple, tight black mini dress with a generous square cleavage.
“Here, try this on. I promise, you will look amazing.”
Vera looks at the dress as if it’s a bomb that might go off at any second, but then she huffs and strides to nearest fitting room, dress in hand. Milan and I settle on the couches right outside the fitting room.
“So, are you going to tell me what’s going on?” Milan runs her hand on the silk top she picked for herself.
“What do you mean? You know Vera, she’s always the last to pick her outfit.”
“Don’t play dumb…” she frowns. “You’ll insult me. You know damn well what I mean. Why are you working?”
Of course I know what she meant. I just don’t want to talk about my own parents cutting me off, just because I didn’t want to follow my daddy’s footsteps.
I sigh, as much as I might not like it, I know I can’t hide anything from Milan. She’s like a human lie detector.
“Papa finally had enough with my partying I guess. He gave me an ultimatum, be a neurosurgeon or be on your own. I chose the latter. That’s what’s going on.” I shrug.
Milan’s frown breaks into shock and then sympathy.
“Oh… I’m so sorry, babe. I didn’t even think about that option. How are you handling it? I mean, it’s not like you got work skills or anything.”
“Jeez, thanks. I’m ok with it, I guess. It’s exhausting but I actually enjoy it sometimes.”
Especially when Mr. Miller is looking at me with those gorgeous eyes.
My eyes are nothing compared to his.
“And how’s your boss? Is he like, old?” Milan’s eye narrow slightly, “Is he one of those, ‘drop the pen, and pick it up slowly while I’m glaring into your ass’? ‘Cause that sexual harassment, you know that right?” she says deadpan.
A laugh escapes from my lips. “No, he’s insanely handsome and young… but he has a strong policy against mingling with the employees, so don’t worry about some old fart trying to get it on with me, I’m safe in that department.”
I look down at the heather-grey mini dress I’m holding in my hands. It’s sexy, not extremely expensive and not my first choice when we first entered this boutique.
God, I hate shopping on a budget.
“Deliciously hot, you say?” Milan puts a finger on her chin while her eyes drift into the distance and a ‘wolf got the sheep’ smile is plastered on her face.
“I did not say that.” I arch a brow then roll my eyes.
Although… That description would be dead-on.
“My, my… I’ll have to escort you back to your office, to make sure you arrived safely of course. You know how worried I am.” She winks and I snicker, “Sure, Milan.”
I would actually love to see her reaction to Mr. Miller.
“Well?” Vera pops out of the fitting room.
Just as I thought, the dress fits her flawlessly. Her curvy body is filling every inch of the dress to perfection.
“Well hot damn, cousin!” Milan gives her a wolf whistle.
I smile and clap my hands together. “Wow! You look amazing, just like I said. Now, let’s go to the register and buy these lovely clothes.”
I managed to navigate them out of the boutique before they set their minds to check out the shoe collection. As badly as I would like to pair my dress with those brand new Prada shoes, I can’t go around spending my money.
God, this sucks.
“Vera, take these, I’m going to Katya’s office. I want to check out her sizzling hot boss.” Milan holds her shopping bags out for Vera.
“What about me? I want to go see your office too.” Vera turns her warm chocolate brown eyes to me.
“Well, you can’t. You got that date with that guy, what’s his name... Andrew? Andy? Alex?” Milan frowns slightly as she tries to pinpoint the guy’s name.
“You got a date?” I ask with a big smile.
Vera nods and blushes, taking the shopping bags from Milan.
“Yeah, his name is Aiden.” Vera gives Milan a stern look then places the shopping bags in the trunk of her Benz.
“I met him at my tennis practice. He’s one of the sweetest guys I know.” She adds after closing the trunk.
“Well, get going then! I don’t want to hold you up. Milan will just catch a cab, so don’t worry about her getting home.” I glance at Milan and she nods enthusiastically.
Once Milan is buckled in my car, I cast her a quick look.
“Is she going to get hurt again?” I ask, all humor gone.
“No. No way. I’m keeping a close eye on this one. There is no way I’m letting her go through that hell again.”
I glance back at Milan and see her face is set in determination.
“Good. ‘Cause I don’t know how many heartbreaks she can withstand… or how many times I can see her broken.” I say quietly.
When it comes to romance, Vera is the unluckiest girl I know. And not because she’s not pretty or has a bitchy personality, she’s a knockout and a sweetheart, but that’s just what it is, she’s too naïve. Even at the age of twenty-four, she has the romantic mentality and common sense of a sixteen year old. So when a guy makes a fool out of her, she’s completely blind to it and when it’s suddenly all over, she simply falls apart and we’re are the ones who pick up the pieces and glue her back together.
But not this time... Milan got her finger on the pulse.
I walk Milan into the building and up to my office. Smiling at the stories she’s telling me about her time in the Alps.
Who knew tent sex on a mountain was something she was into?
The easy smile on my lips vanishes when I enter my office and look at Mr. Miller through the glass wall.
The sight of him holding Eliza tight to his body stops me at my tracks. His hand cradles her head as he murmurs something into her ear. She nods and wipes her cheeks.
She’s crying… what the hell?
As if he feels my presence, Mr. Miller turns his head and our eyes lock.
It startles me into attention and I look away, at Milan who is standing behind me with an embarrassed look on her face.
“What’s going on?” Milan whispers.
“I have absolutely no idea.” I whisper back.
“This is a bad time… I’ll leave.”
“Umm… are you sure?”
“Yeah, yeah, don’t worry about it. He’s hot like fuck. I’ll call you later.” She hugs me then turns and leaves.
I settle back into my chair, trying not to look at the warm display of affection that is happening beyond the glass wall. I put my focus on the unfinished reports I need to finalize. Ten minutes later, Eliza finally departs without even a glance at my direction. All that time, Mr. Miller was holding and comforting her and all I wanted was for the ground to open up and swallow me.
The glass door opens and my eyes shoot up, finding Mr. Miller advancing towards my desk.
“Who was the woman with you?” his tone is casual as he comes to a stop in front of me.
“My childhood friend, Milan. She wanted to see where I work, but I guess we picked a bad time for office sighting. Why was Eliza crying? Is she all right?”
“She had a death in the family. Not someone she was awfully close to, but still, it was her family member.” Mr. Miller sighs.
“Please give her my condolences.” I say with as much sympathy as I can find for her.
She basically used the death of her family member to get attention from Mr. Miller. What a disrespectful bitch.
Stop. That’s cruel, even if she wasn’t close to that person. She still hurts.
“I’ll make sure I’ll pass them to her. Are my reports done?” Mr. Miller crosses his arms across his broad chest, causing his biceps to bulge.
“I still have a few… shouldn’t take long.”
Mr. Miller nods then turns back into his office and I let out a shaky breath.
He sure is hot as fuck.
TAO is pretty packed when I walk in. The hostess leads me through a beautifully decorated corridor to the private room where the surprise party is taking place. The room is exquisite. It is decorated with warm hues and majestic Asian designs. The comfy chairs look extremely inviting and as I make my way through the room, I greet the people I know and smile politely at the ones I don’t. I find Milan and Vera at the bar, already sipping their drinks. I reach them and order an Apple Martini.
“Well, you look fuckable as always.” Milan blurb
s out and Vera’s face reddens.
I arch an eyebrow, “Don’t tell me you’re drunk already.”
“Giddy… the word is, giddy.” She winks at me.
I look over at Vera and she just shrugs.
“How was your date with Aiden?” I ask Vera with a smile.
“Amazing! He took me to Central Park and we had a picnic!” she beams at me.
“He sounds romantic, I’m glad he makes you happy.”
“He does,” Vera mumbles and her eyes glaze over as her mind drifts into some tender memory.
The bartender winks at me as he places my Martini before me. He’s handsome, but he’s not my type, so I smile politely and turn to face the room then take a sip of my Martini. I scan the room to see if there are more people I know that I might have missed, and when my eyes fall on the back of a certain head, a wave of heat rushes over my body.
Wide-eyed, I slightly angle my head to the right to get a better view of his profile. What I see throws me into shock. In an instant my heart stops beating, and then it beats so fast I feel like its about to leap out of my throat.
“What the…” I hear myself whisper.
“Huh? Did you say something? Whoa! What’s with face?” Milan’s frown comes into my line of sight, blocking my view. “Hey, are you ok?” her eyes scan my face.
“I, umm… oh my God, what is he doing here?” I breathe out.
“What? Who? Katya, you’re starting to freak me out.”
I nod my head behind her and Milan turns around. After a moment, she immediately turns to face me.
“Well… this just got interesting!” her eyes gleam with mischief.
“What, What? Who it is? It’s not nice to be kept out of the loop! If you know who she’s talking about, then spill!” Vera whines.
“Her boss is here. Her very hot, sexy, yummy, dark and dangerous, push me against the wall, bend me over and give me the best O of my life, boss is here.” Milan wiggles her eyebrows at me while Vera is pretty much about to pass out, from what looks like her entire blood supply rushing to her face.
“Wh..aa..tt? where?” Vera gulps.
“You see that tall guy, with the black hair and black button down?” Milan asks.
