“Why?” Dirk asked, confused. “Why would that be important to anyone?”
“To control. To manipulate,” Fiona snapped. “Greed. Don’t you want to make Cinder stop? Well, if you could harness powers, magical energies, you could make her do what you wanted. Anybody. You could have any woman you wanted. All the money you’d ever need. A mansion.”
“Hey this sounds like allusions to the Stormweathers. I don’t like where this is going,” Selric said jokingly. “Sounds like me: women, money, mansion.”
“Stop it,” Fiona laughed, pinching Selric’s wrist. “Dirk, you can’t be that...that simple.”
“Well, I guess I am. I’m happier here, with all of you. Even you, Fiona,” he said plainly. Fiona sat flabbergasted.
“Melissa?” Selric asked.
“I think Fiona needs to tell us something else,” Cinder said softly, somberly, her eyes sad. “Something she needs to tell someone; anyone.”
“No, Cinder,” Fiona begged. Cinder nodded. “He was terrible to me. Terrible. I don’t want to.” Cinder said nothing, simply looking at the stoic woman hiding her pain while the others all paled at the pain the pain priestess’s voice. “He did...did...bad...no Cinder.”
“Who did?” Dirk asked, his face pale and mouth ajar in shock at her horror.
“My grandfather. He was wicked and he made me...made me. No,” she said, turning her face to Selric.
“Shhh,” Selric said, rubbing Fiona’s shoulders.
“It wasn’t the sex, it was the kind of acts, the manipulation, the degradation.”
“The betrayal of trust. The pain?” Cinder asked. Fiona’s eyes shot to Cinder as if she were completely right, then she turned away again. “The pain isn’t what bothers you, although feeling it is why you turned to Aura, isn’t it? Now, you’re too strong for the abuse to scar you,” Cinder said, touching the priestess. The soft caress was a harbor in a storm.
“No. It wasn’t that it had hurt so much. It wasn’t the pain of his actions. It was the pain of how his wife ignored my horror. My parents died, in a fire, and I lived with Granny and...him. Granny loved me so much, I could tell. But she loved him more. She knew. I told her, but she thought if she were nicer to me, than I wouldn’t mind; I wouldn’t tell. She was right, I didn’t. But I would only take so much and when he continued on and on, and got sicker and sicker...I was only a child...” she said bitterly. “...I killed him. I stabbed him, I killed him, and I ripped his guts out and I liked it! I’ve liked pain and hurt ever since. But Granny didn’t and she was going to tell, so...so...I” she turned to Selric and only he knew that she wept.
“Well,” Cinder said quietly, as if saying “Isn’t that something?”
“They never knew I did it. “A tiny ten year old girl could never mutilate like that,” they said,” then she fell quiet. “I don’t feel bad about doing it. I feel bad I had to do it. I feel bad now for what you might think about me.” She wiped her eyes like a child and slid off Selric’s lap.
“We understand,” Selric whispered, still holding her close beside him. “I don’t think you’re bad at all.”
“Even I understand,” Dirk said quietly, the gentle man clearly moved. “Actually, it helps me understand you and the things you do a little better.” Fiona looked at him, only briefly, then cast her eyes down.
“Melissa?” Selric asked quietly, the mood at the table now very somber.
“Do we need to?” she asked. “Everyone is so quiet now. I thought we wanted to forget our troubles.”
“We want to understand each other better, so that when we’re down, we can help each other,” Selric said with a smile.
“I don’t think...” Melissa tried.
“We all did it,” Dirk said sweetly, taking her hand, wet with perspiration.
“It won’t hurt,” Fiona said smiling, her eyes still red, though no tears had fallen in front of any of her friends.
“I’m running. I’ll admit that,” she said.
“From what?” Cinder asked when Melissa stopped.
“Stoneheim,” she said. “Stoneheim and everything in it.”
“Your parents?” Fiona asked.
“No! Not them.”
“Are you sure?” Cinder asked.
“I don’t feel like confessing anything. My life is my own. Why are you making me? You all just wanted to get something off your chest. I don’t.”
“I didn’t,” Selric said.
“I certainly didn’t,” Fiona added fervently with another sniffle from her tiny nose.
“I don’t care,” Melissa said, getting angry.
“You don’t have to tell us,” Cinder said. “We aren’t making you.” Melissa relaxed, realizing that she should not lash out at them when they were clearly only trying to help.
“I just...I’m just a little,” Melissa started, and she stood on that threshold of trust, so afraid to leap off, but being lured by the possibility that there was a warm, safe place there to land: a place she would be accepted and cared for as she was.
“Don’t be,” Fiona said. “Go on.”
“I’ll say just a little,” Melissa agreed, even smiling in embarrassment. “I was...I was forced to work for someone I despised. He changed and I had to get out of there before I became like him. They made me do things...hurt people, and I didn’t like it. That’s why I ran away. I couldn’t stay there, so I just...I just quit. They would have forced me back in; or killed me, and my family. I hope they’re all right...my family, that is. I worry about them constantly, but Daddy says that they had nothing to fear. You see, he knows the same man.” She fell silent.
“Is that all?” Cinder asked, and Melissa nodded. Cinder doubted her, but knew that what Melissa held would be better for her to keep inside her for a while longer.
“Well, I’m ready to go,” Melissa said with a forced smile, sliding over Dirk’s lap. “You coming, Fiona? What?” she asked when they all looked at her. “Really,” she sighed. “My story does not compare to all of yours. It doesn’t. Mine is maybe just fresher. I’m not ready to talk about it. Not yet. Relax,” she said laughing convincingly. “That is all you’re getting and there is no deep secret. I swear to you as my friends.” That was enough to convince them all, and Fiona got up with her; Selric rising to let her out. Melissa actually kissed his cheek and bent back over the table, kissing Cinder then Dirk, as well on the cheek.
“See you all later,” she said. Fiona kissed them all on the lips then the two donned their fur-lined cloaks and said good-bye once more before stepping out into the blowing snow. Selric ordered one more round and they drank and talked on no particular subject for fifteen minutes.
“I’d better get home and see how things are,” Selric said.
“To Alanna?” Cinder asked spryly.
“I guess so,” Selric said, a guilty look on his face. “That’s one of the things.” Selric had introduced her to them all, then brought her briefly to visit twice, but generally the time he spent with the group was time away from Alanna. “Good night, kids,” he said jokingly, kissing Cinder on the lips and patting Dirk’s shoulder firmly. “I’ll be in touch.” He cloaked himself and went on his way. Cinder and Dirk had chatted and held hands for an hour when Dirk announced that it was time to take her home, so she went with him and he escorted her on his arm.
“You know,” she said, walking as close to him as she could. “When I first came to the city months ago, I was so naive and immature.” Dirk kept himself from laughing when she admitted how things had changed, when he could see they had not. She smiled, her face glowing in radiant beauty, looking as if she knew his thoughts. “I’ve grown and learned so much from you humans. I’d always been with my mother. Rarely did I go to the nearby town where I met my first humans, but I never had any friends.” That night was the first night that Dirk had ever heard Cinder admit to being different than humans.
“I feel the same way,” Dirk said. “Six months ago, my life changed. When I met you, Missy, and Selric, even Fio
na—poor Fiona—I was all alone. Though I don’t like alot of the things that you all do, I don’t feel alone anymore.” They walked in silence for several blocks, the snow falling now lightly about them. The full moon, reflecting off the abundant accumulation, lit the city in silvery-blue light.
“I wish you would protect me, like Selric does,” Cinder said. “I feel so safe with you; physically. Emotionally, though, I’m not very secure. I mean, it’s not your responsibility, but you always seem to care so much, but in an authoritarian kind of way.”
“What’s that mean?”
“You just said that you don’t like some of the things we do. Does that include Selric?”
“Well…no. He is ok,” Dirk answered curiously.
“That would have nothing to do with the fact that he is a boy, and you are a boy, and we, the people who you think need to do things you approve of, are girls?” She smiled at him. “Maybe you should try to understand how I feel, then try to help me, not order me.” Dirk thought on it; she seemed right. How could he demand so much from her; she was not a possession of his. It never really occurred to him to let her live her own life. She always seemed so innocent, so in need of fathering. “Remember the knights?”
“Yes,” he blushed. “Not too much protection there. I’m just glad they didn’t hurt you bad.”
“But you tried.” She smiled, leaning her head against his arm, like she did almost every time together. “You stepped up and put yourself in danger to protect me, and my honor. And what about those big wolves in the alley? You saved my life. You saved me and I love you.” He smiled. Her words were warm and sincere, not fiery and passionate as she had said them hundreds of times before.
“I’ll try to protect you the way you want. Does that make you happy? But I’m worried about you. I just feel like…” Cinder smiled, her eyes sparkling in happiness and she nodded and Dirk sighed and fell silent, ignoring his worry.
“Yes,” she said in appreciation for his concern, even if she did not share his sentiment. Dirk walked her home and inside to her door.
“Now, I can’t protect you if you keep doing stupid things. Try to stay in once in a while and don’t be going out with strange men.”
“Would you like to stay?” she asked, a look of hopeful adoration on her face. Cinder undressed before him. Out of character, Cinder removed her heels, her lingerie and stood before him naked in her immortal beauty. She smiled a kind loving smile seeming void of lust. Dirk moved forward and swept her into his arms and laid her in her bed.
Panting and totally spent, Dirk held Cinder in his arms, lying on their sides, Cinder backed up to him tightly. He kissed her shoulder, each of the little freckles that formed a pattern. He laughed as he tried to remember where he had seen that pattern, and again kissed them one at a time.
“What is it?” Cinder asked sleepily.
“Just kissing your little freckles. They look familiar.”
“Well you have seen them before,” she sighed with a giggle.
“Well, yes, I know that. But they…I never noticed. They look like a constellation.”
“Oh, how cute,” she said, trying to look, but unable. With a sigh she got up from the warmth of their embrace and the dark fur bedcover and turned up the dim lamp. Moving in a planned, smooth pattern she trotted quickly past her wardrobe, grabbing a hand mirror from a shelf within and leapt back into bed with Dirk. He laughed at her antics, but admired her lovely form and grace as she did it. When she sat beside him, Dirk immediately put his hands on her, not lustfully, but just to stroke her soft, warm flesh.
“Triana,” she said in revelation.
“Eh?” Dirk asked. “Come back under the covers. You will catch cold.”
“They look like the constellation Triana,” Cinder clarified.
“The goddess of Love? Well that makes sense,” he said, kissing her arm.
“You don’t want to stay?” she asked.
“Of course. But I have business early in the morning. I’m going to practice my swordsmanship so I can kill the Fiend and protect you,” he said with a laugh. “And I need to check the store before I go in.”
“All right,” she said. “I will just sleep alone.”
“Dream of me,” he said, tucking her in and rising to dress, or he would never be able to leave that bed.
Cinder watched him leave then tried to sleep, but something haunted her, something in her senses was telling her to get out of her room; something terrible was going to happen there. She rose and threw on her silken robe, then placed another log on the fire that Dirk had built for her. She paced for several minutes then, extremely anxious, dressed again. She went to The Spittoon next door. “That’s not too far,” she thought. “Dirk can’t be mad at me for just coming here.”
14
The Fiend walked the streets illuminated by the full moon, plotting Its revenge. The snow no longer fell and the clouds had blown over, leaving the deep violet sky as a great canopy over the world. It would find that group and kill them all, some more slowly than the others, of course. It had no use for the men. The werewolves had failed in their simple task, leaving the Fiend more angry and vicious than before. “I will kill the men and save the females for my new lair. I will kill this Selric and Dirk quickly, in their homes if I have to,” It thought. “I’ll worry about investigators later.” The Fiend stood from where It hid and watched, ready to go to Bessemer’s first, when It detected a shape and scent It knew well. The figure disappeared into a building. The Fiend waited for hours, and when the acquaintance failed to emerge, the Fiend pursued it. Its plans had changed.
Cinder played at dice, drank, and flirted for two hours, accumulating over one-hundred and fifty crowns and she thought it her lucky night, especially when a man came to her, smiling a broad, closed-mouth grin. Her heart raced. Though he wasn’t particularly handsome, he was nearly as tall as Dirk and much more broad; much, much more. A great mass of knotted muscles. “I’d certainly be safe with him,” she thought. “Even Dirk would agree.” She batted her thick lashes and smiled. “Hi,” she said, “I’m Cinder.”
“Hi,” he replied, sitting down and gambling with her briefly. Cinder had been drinking, as usual, and felt her keen desire while next to him. With the alcohol blocking her empathic ability, Cinder’s other senses came to the fore. She could sense none of his emotions, but could smell his manliness; his animalistic scent. His strength was enough to make her feel small and afraid. He, in turn, felt her excitement, and he whispered in her ear.
“Wouldn’t you like somewhere more private?” His whisper rumbled like thunder on a warm summer evening, the hairs on the back of her neck bristled and Cinder closed her eyes at the exhilaration, and felt herself tingle with arousal. She simply nodded in response, unable to focus her mind for a more verbal answer. “Where?” he asked and she pointed meekly at the door. He led Cinder there and placed her cape about her shoulders.
They only had to travel one door over. Cinder went in the building, unlocked her door, and went inside her room, dropping her cloak off and walking enticingly across to the bed. She placed one more log on the nearly dead embers then straightened the sheets where she and Dirk had just made gentle love. She had wanted more, but she did what Dirk had wanted that night; soft and loving. That’s what he needed.
When Cinder stood upright after fixing the bed, she found her next lover just behind her, and she squealed excitedly as he roughly grabbed her shoulders. “No,” she pleaded, “not yet. I want to do something.”
“No,” he said. “I want it now.” He tried forcing her back onto the bed.
“No, really. I’m sure you’ll like it.” She squirmed, keeping him off balance enough that he could not use his brute strength to knock her right over. He allowed her to wriggle free, waiting impatiently. Cinder sauntered to her chest of drawers, and from the top one pulled forth a long leather strap and a silk scarf; a look of deviant yet innocent excitement on her face. She walked back to him and he took the items from her, tos
sed her on the bed, then fell on her, a wild stare in his green eyes, as if something he had been long awaiting had finally come.
He grabbed Cinder’s wrists and bound them tightly together, very tightly, then tied them to one of the rails at the head of the bed. Cinder winced. “That might be a little too tight,” she murmured.
“Shut up,” he growled. “This is what you want, isn’t it?” She nodded, totally cowed and anticipatory. “Well, me too.” Cinder tried to speak, but he gagged her with the scarf. Cinder closed her eyes, waiting to feel his attention, when he ripped her dress off of her. She protested, but could speak nothing. Twillyfoot flew insanely around inside his cage, throwing itself against the bars in its excited state. Cinder was normally very protective of her clothing, but for the sake of ecstasy, she didn’t care; not this time. Something was amiss, but Cinder blocked It out, thinking it only her imagination. She put herself at his mercy, and let him have his will.
A loud bang woke Dirk from a nightmare. The room was cold when he jumped from bed, so he pulled off his blanket and wrapped himself with it. Dirk lit the lamp to see what must have fallen, when he heard the door to his landing outside splinter. He jumped, startled, and dropped the blanket so that he could draw his sword, his blood frozen, feet rooted in fear. When he heard no other immediate noises, Dirk raised the lamp and walked cautiously to the door. Thrust clear through the portal was the blade of a long dagger. The door was splintered and the bar was cracked, as if something of immense strength had been trying to break it down. “The Fiend!” he gasped, jumping back from the door. Dirk looked around, but knew he was alone and there was no one near to help him. He ran down the stairs and called his guards. The two on duty came with the dog and followed Dirk upstairs. When he got there, Dirk dressed fully into his armor, while explaining to them what he had heard.
They all approached the door, but the dog seemed to sense nothing. Dirk struggled to free the bar from the door since it had been shattered in place and was now wedged between the supports. He then thrust the door open, needing to heave it against the heavy snowfall outside. The roof was covered with many heavy boot prints, but there was no sign of the Fiend as the chill winter wind whipped briskly over the rooftop. They went out and the dog sniffed briefly about, then howled and jerked violently to be free of its leash. The first guard held the dog in place while the other and Dirk looked all about, thinking by the animal’s distress that the Fiend must be near. But the dog whimpered and howled not out of excitement but out of fear. The guards released the animal and it bolted inside Dirk’s room and hid there, while they checked the wall around the edges, Dirk peering cautiously up onto the roof of his room. They found nothing until Dirk went behind the door.
By Moonlight Wrought (Bt Moonlight Wrought) Page 39
