by Tia Siren
“I’m only going to make this clear once,” Bastian said in an even voice. Rage sparked in his eyes, though, when he glanced over at me. “She doesn’t want to be with you. She told you she was leaving, so you better let her go. For your best interest, let her the fuck go. Don’t contact her. Don’t track her down. I’ll be personally informing the governor, the mayor, and the police chief that he needs to open an investigation into your unit, but also into your personal career as a police officer.”
“Fuck you,” Sid said coldly. “You think I care about what anyone tells me to do?”
“You like being a police officer because no one questions your authority,” Bastian said, shrugging his shoulders. “You don’t want to lose that sense of power, so I wouldn’t suggest crossing me further. I’ll have your badge and gun by the end of the week, along with several lawsuits against you and your partner here for an illegal arrest and assault.” He turned to catch Ethan’s gaze. “Let’s get out of here.”
I kept my gaze on the floorboard as Bastian quickly climbed into the passenger seat with me. He shut the door, blocking out Sid’s loud swearing in the morning air. Ethan didn’t even bother with his seat belt before he floored it away from the curb in the direction of the freeway. He let out a shaky sigh as he looked in the rearview mirror at Bastian.
“You’re lucky that I love working for you,” he said. “I nearly got fucking killed by two corrupt cops without knowing what the hell is going on.”
“Make sure to ask questions next time,” Bastian replied, a ghost of a grin tugging at his lips. “That goes against your job description, though.”
Ethan let out a nervous laugh. “Yeah, well, duly noted for next time. I’m just glad we’re driving away from that crazy son of a bitch.”
Numbness washed over me as I stared out at the wintery landscape while Ethan pulled onto the freeway. Free. The word repeated itself in my mind. A wave of emotions crashed over me as I glanced at Bastian, who was busily texting on his phone. He was the image of perfect calm despite just having a gun pointed directly at him.
My phone buzzed from inside my purse. I reached for it out of habit and found Sid’s name flashing on the screen.
“Can I see your phone?” Bastian asked.
I looked up in surprise at the question. Slowly, I handed it over while Bastian glanced down at the caller ID with a humorless laugh. He rolled down the passenger window and tossed my phone right out.
“Hey,” I exclaimed, twisting around to watch the phone shatter into a million pieces, followed by a car driving over it. “That’s my phone, Bastian. My parents call me, and if they—”
“He’s using that phone to track you, remember? He would have used it to follow us. I can guarantee you that.”
I sat back in the passenger seat because he was right. Sid had used my phone to track my whereabouts, but I needed a phone to at least call my parents. They needed to know that I was going to be okay. I had to warn them, too.
“I need a phone to warn my parents,” I said. “If he calls them—”
“It’s going to be fine, Jo,” Bastian said, and he reached across to lay a hand on my bouncing knee. “Your nerves are shot. I’m going to buy you a new phone to use. That way he can’t track you and there’s no way to get ahold of you.”
“You’re going to buy me a new phone?”
“Yes,” he said. “A new one with only a few numbers in it. Ethan, pull off on the next exit to go to the Apple Store. Might need a new computer while we’re at it.”
He didn’t give me a chance to argue against it. Ethan parked in front of the Apple Store, and both of us waited inside the SUV while Bastian went inside. He emerged from the store fifteen minutes later with a large bag tucked under his arm.
“New phone,” Bastian said as he handed a small box to me with the newest iPhone model inside. “There’s also a new computer and iPad in there, too. I don’t know what he has placed on your computer, but it wouldn’t surprise me if it tracks you the second you turn it on.”
I stared down at the new Apple products in the seat between us. Tears prickled my eyes when I looked up at Bastian’s smile, and I finally succumbed to the emotions bubbling inside me.
Chapter 9
Bastian
Joanna’s bottom lip trembled before she burst into hard sobs. She covered her face to shield the tears, but her shoulders trembled violently. I didn’t know what to do besides slide close to her and wrap an arm around her shoulders to calm the storm breaking in her. The past three hours seemed like a surreal blur to me. I only imagined how the entire weekend had gone for Joanna, who was obviously worn out from the situation in general. And after the stress of this morning, even the strongest person would struggle to keep it together.
I caught sight of Ethan’s eyes in the rearview mirror as he pulled out of the Apple Store parking lot. Neither one of us knew what to do. I let Joanna cry for as long as she needed. Ethan drove silently in the direction of Park City. Eventually, Joanna’s cries tapered off, and she looked up at me with an ashamed grimace. Her cheeks were blotchy from crying. The dark purple bruise around her right eye was swelling again.
“I’m sorry.” She hiccupped, swiping at her eyes in embarrassment. “I normally don’t cry like this. I swear.”
“You have every right to cry,” I said and fished through my suit jacket for my handkerchief. “Something tells me that you’ve been through hell over the past couple years.”
A thin smile spread across Joanna’s face, and she took the handkerchief from my fingers. She ran a finger over the monogram on the corner.
“Hell is an understatement,” she said quietly. “What now? What am I going to do now?”
“You’re going to stay with me for as long as you need to,” I said. “No matter how long it takes, you need to keep your distance from that asshole. It’s dangerous to go back right now, Jo. You know that, right?”
Her fingers tightened around my handkerchief. “I know. I’ve read the statistic somewhere that it’s the most dangerous to leave.”
“What about pressing charges?” I suggested, taking in those dark and ugly marks on her skin with a stab of intense rage. “On a higher level, I could connect you to someone who would hear your case before talking with Sid and his partner.”
“Maybe. I don’t know if pressing charges is going to help.”
She was retreating back into that shell of fear and denial out of habit. I chewed on the inside of my cheek to keep myself from letting my irritation show. I had known it wouldn’t be easy convincing Joanna to leave, but to stay away was an entirely different process. It was much harder to do.
“I just don’t know what I’m going to do now,” Joanna said. “You know what I mean? Everything feels so different.”
“You should feel free now,” I replied, tilting my head to look at her. “That’s the entire point. You can do whatever you want now without worrying about what he is going to do.”
“It still feels terrifying,” she muttered and turned to look out the window.
The rest of the drive to Park City was spent in silence. I had no idea what I was doing by inviting Joanna into my personal space. I had crossed the line between professionalism and being personal, but I didn’t regret it, either. She needed help, and I couldn’t have lived with myself if I hadn’t done something. Still, the little realization forced my guard to go back up against the emotions I felt when it came to having Joanna around me all the time.
Ethan pulled up the private driveway on the outskirts of my log mansion. He punched in the code at the gate. Joanna straightened up in her seat as the gate swung open to gaze out across the acres of snow and landscape. She twisted around to take in large evergreen pine trees that were scattered about the property.
“Is that a barn?” Joanna asked. She pointed to the building a few yards away from the log home itself. “Please tell me that you have horses in there.”
Her eagerness filled me with a sparkle of hope that maybe this wasn�
��t a bad idea. I shook my head at her with an apologetic smile. “Not at the moment. I usually have horses here during the summer, though.”
“Remind me to come back here during the summer,” Joanna said.
Ethan pulled the SUV up to the front door. He opened the door for Joanna and helped her hop out before going to the back of the SUV to get the suitcases. I pulled out my house keys as Joanna followed behind me with her eyes riveted on the wraparound porch and the frozen pond down the slope of the front lawn.
“Your house is beautiful,” Joanna said as she turned to look at me with wide eyes. “I can’t believe you live out here. It’s beautiful.”
Pride filled me when I pushed the door open for Joanna to step inside. A fire was going in the fireplace like I had asked for in my email to the housekeeper who came by every day to make sure everything was tip-top. The hardwood floors were polished as well, while the fresh scent of laundry filled my lungs.
“Come inside,” I said and motioned for her to follow me. “I’ll show you around the place if you want a tour.”
Joanna smiled. “I’d love that.”
“Great.” I grinned at her, thankful for the change of topic. “Let’s get the suitcases in here so I can show you the entire house.”
“It’s not a house,” she said, gazing up at the wooden beams. “It’s half luxury mansion and half hunting cabin. I love it.”
“Make yourself at home,” I said. “I’m going to help Ethan with the suitcases.”
I found Ethan pulling out the last suitcase from the back of the SUV when I closed the front door behind me. I pulled out a couple hundred dollars from my wallet and handed them over to Ethan.
He arched an eyebrow at them. “What’s that for?”
“A tip for helping me out today,” I said, but he pushed the money away from me. “I’m not trying to buy your loyalty in case you’re thinking that. I hope it’s working, though.”
Ethan laughed as he closed the trunk of the SUV. “I like working for you. Even if it does involve getting a gun thrown in my face by a crooked cop.” He stopped to give me a long and hard look. “I don’t know what is going on with this woman of yours, but she needs to get some counseling or something. My wife used to be in a relationship with a guy like the one from today. She went back repeatedly before he nearly killed her, so she got some help afterward. It made a huge difference.”
“Duly noted,” I said, nodding. “Still, take the money. Take out your wife and kids to a nice dinner on me.”
“You don’t need me at all this week?” Ethan asked, taking the money gingerly. “I can stay around. Not a problem at all.”
I clasped Ethan on the shoulder with a smile. “No offense, man, but I don’t want to see you at all this week. I’ve got the Jeep parked in the barn. I’ll be fine.”
“I won’t argue with you then. The wife will be happy to see me for once. It’s such a chore driving your ass around.”
I laughed at Ethan’s dramatic sigh. He helped me carry Joanna’s suitcases to the front door. He left after placing them inside the foyer. I shrugged out of my jacket to hang it next to Joanna’s coat on the peg. I hesitated for a moment as I stared at her jacket. The last person who had ever hung their jacket there was Sierra, years ago.
Shaking away those bad memories, I walked through the hallway to the kitchen, where I could hear Joanna walking around. She was looking around the spacious kitchen with a smile when I stepped inside to join her.
“Have you walked around a bit?” I asked, rubbing my hands together to warm the chill out of my fingers. “It’s a big house to walk around by yourself. There’s even a heated pool on the side if you’re interested in swimming.”
“This feels like a vacation,” Joanna said, shaking her head in awe. “Really, Bastian, this is too much. You don’t do this for anyone.”
I shrugged my shoulders indifferently even though Joanna was right. I never did things like this for anyone because of what had happened with Sierra. I made it a point to never get close enough to someone to care about their personal lives, but it had happened with Joanna effortlessly. Another reason for me to be on my guard when it came to whatever I inwardly hoped would happen.
“Let me show you the guest room,” I said and motioned for Joanna to follow me up the stairs. “There’s a private bathroom attached to it. I can set up a desk in here if you need it for work.”
“I’m not sure what I can do for you here while I’m away from my desk,” Joanna replied as she followed behind me down the hallway. “I’m not here to answer phones because that’ll arouse some suspicion back in the office.”
I didn’t think about that. No one knew, including Roger and Sabrina, that Joanna had left to stay with me. The only excuse I had provided on my way out the door was that I had given Joanna some personal time off and I was taking some time off as well. I just didn’t trust Sid to stay away from Joanna, but I also had an uneasy feeling that she would have a hard time resisting him. She was mercurial when it came to accepting that he was a monster.
“I’ll find something for you to do,” I replied. “Maybe you can help me clean out my office. Organize it. I rarely work out of my office here.”
I pushed the door to the guest room open with my foot. My maid had gone through the room to tidy everything up, and she’d also folded fresh linens on the bed. A stack of towels sat neatly at the end of the king-sized canopy bed. I set the suitcases next to the dresser while Joanna slowly circled the room with wide eyes. She looked over at me as I stood back to give her some time to take everything in.
“You’re going to work from your office here?” she asked.
I nodded as I leaned up against the doorframe. “I need a little break from the office anyway. I’m going to stick around for a while. Is that okay with you?”
“I don’t want you to miss out on anything that could cost you money,” Joanna said. “You’ve already done so much, and I’ll honestly be out of here within a few weeks, once I find an apartment to move into.”
“Stay as long as you need to,” I said firmly. “I’m serious, Joanna. I don’t want you to leave here until you are one hundred percent comfortable with being able to stay away from that piece of shit. He’s toxic, and he won’t ever change.”
Joanna smoothed a hand along one of the canopy posts as she chewed on her bottom lip in contemplation. “I think he’ll stay away from me because he has no real way of contacting me, you know?”
I sighed inwardly at the meek response. It further cemented that I needed to stick around to keep an eye on Joanna until she worked through her emotions properly. I knew deep down that it would only take one “I’m sorry” from Sid for her to go running back to the familiar. She was out of her element and completely lost when it came to what to do. Which was why I tilted my head to catch Joanna’s eyes when she looked up at me through watery eyes.
“I’m going to stay here for the week to protect you from Sid,” I said, and then added as an afterthought, “to protect you from yourself also.”
Chapter 10
Joanna
“I’m going to stay here for the week to protect you from Sid, to protect you from yourself also.”
The thought of staying in Bastian’s log mansion was enough to make my head ache with confusion, but for him to be here the entire time? A whole new sensation took over.
“You’re going to stay here the entire time?” I repeated. “Bastian, you don’t have to stay here. I can handle everything by myself.”
Bastian’s eyes didn’t falter in their intensity as he shook his head at me. “I’m serious when I say that. I’m going to stay here because I’m worried about you going back to that dickhead ex-boyfriend of yours.”
“What makes you think I would do that?” I asked defensively, crossing my arms. “Do you think I enjoy being his punching bag?”
“Obviously not,” he replied, and dark clouds gathered in his eyes. “I just know how tough it is to get away from that situation. He’s goi
ng to throw out an apology to you and promise change, but are you going to believe it?”
I turned away to gaze at the king-sized canopy bed that called my name. Exhaustion tugged at my brain as I stared down at the mountain of throw pillows that smelled fresh and clean. The entire guest room was the size of my house back in Salt Lake. My old house, I corrected with a painful jolt. Maybe Bastian had a point about having a hard time letting go of the past. It wasn’t easy to just forget years’ worth of the good times, either.
“That’s what I thought,” Bastian said. “It’s not easy, Joanna. No one is saying that it will be, but you’ve got to see your self-worth here You don’t deserve to be in a relationship where you are getting hurt all the time.”
Bitterness tore through me as I stared at the suitcases at the end of the bed. This was what my life had come to—living out of suitcases because I had been too afraid and confused about what to do when it came to Sid. I could’ve walked away the first time Sid had punched me, but I had forgiven him the moment that he had promised to get help. The help had lasted for a few months, and Sid had explained to me that it was the stress from his job. He saw horrific things. He told family members that their loved ones were dead and had been mangled in car accidents. Shit like that weighed heavily on a person’s soul over time. His temper never quieted though. Those appointments with the police department counselor eventually tapered off, and the physical abuse began again.
It was all a vicious cycle that was only broken up by going to work, Monday through Friday from eight to five. That was my respite, my break from how fucked up things had gotten in my life.
I still felt uneasy, though, being alone with Bastian for an entire week while he worked from his office here. I had made it a point to limit my contact with him as much as possible over the years to avoid embarrassing myself because I found him attractive in every way possible. Despite that hard exterior he carried around in the office back in Salt Lake, he had a warm and compassionate side. He hadn’t hesitated to jump in when I was drowning within Sid’s control but also in my own fucked-up emotions that didn’t know which way was up these days. Everything just felt utterly numb and confusing at the same time.
