That’s it? He saw an opportunity and took it? Has anyone ever said no to this man?
“You’re used to getting what you want, then,” I say, tilting my head to the side as I try to figure him out.
“I guess you could say that,” he says, eyes locked on me. “But the thing is, there’s not much I usually want. So when I see something worth it, then yeah, I’ll go for it.”
He thinks I’m worth it? When he can have any woman out there, I have to wonder what drove him to choose me. Was it because I was acting uninterested? Or because I was trying to hide in that bar? I might have intrigued him. Either way, I hope he isn’t playing a game with me.
“What exactly is it you want, Ardan?” I find myself asking.
He takes a bite of his food and chews and swallows before answering. “When I know, I’ll let you know. But for right now, I guess I just want to be around you.”
I swallow. “Why?”
“I can’t give you answers I don’t have, Valentina. I saw you, and I want you. That’s all I know.”
“Everyone calls me Tina,” I say, when nothing else seems to come out of my mouth.
“Valentina is such a pretty name, though.”
“So is Ardan,” I fire back. “But the twins were calling you Irish. Why?”
“Everyone calls me Irish. Not many people know my real name,” he explains. “Everyone in the club knows me as Irish.”
“I like calling you Ardan.”
“And I like calling you Valentina.”
“Then I guess that’s what we’re both calling each other,” I say, shrugging my shoulders.
We finish the rest of our meal in silence, pretending that I don’t notice him watching me. Ardan hands me the dessert menu, and I look over it briefly while asking, “What are you getting?”
“What are you doing Friday night?” he asks in that sexy voice of his.
I lower the menu and look at him. “Why?”
“I want to see you is fuckin’ why.”
“I’m getting the cookies-and-cream cheesecake,” I say, putting down the menu without looking over the other options. I love cheesecake. “What are you getting?”
“Valentina—”
“Ardan,” I say, cutting him off. “I googled the Wind Dragons MC, you know.”
“For fuck’s sake, seriously?” he mutters, scrubbing his hand down his face. “Well, you’re still here, so it couldn’t have scared you off too much.”
The waitress comes over, and he orders my cheesecake and a chocolate sundae for himself.
“I’m apartment hunting this weekend,” I tell him.
“Why are you moving?” he asks, checking his phone before looking up and waiting for my answer.
“I’m new in town, so I’m staying at a motel until I find an apartment,” I explain. “This weekend I’m going to check a few out.”
He stares at me like I’ve grown a second head. “You’re living at a fuckin’ motel right now? A motel?”
I nod slowly, wishing I had never opened my big mouth to say anything at all. “Yeah, what’s the big deal? It’s just until I get a place, and it’s not actually a motel, it’s more like a self-catering short-stay accommodation.
“What’s the big fuckin’ deal? You’re alone, looking like you do, in a motel,” he pauses. “Or self-catering whatever, in a city you don’t even know. Yeah, what’s the big deal, right?” he says, a muscle ticking in his jaw.
I roll my eyes. “It’s fine.”
“I have a place you can stay,” he says, looking around the restaurant. “You can move in this weekend.”
“Yeah, no,” I tell him. “Look, no offense, but I don’t even know you. If you keep being this controlling, this is the last time you will ever see me.”
Like I need another controlling asshole in my life.
His lips tighten, but he says nothing.
Our desserts arrive, and to lighten the mood I offer him some of mine. He did take me out to an expensive dinner and has been a gentleman all night. I don’t want us to end the evening on a bad note. His eyes turn heavy-lidded as he leans over the table and I feed him a spoonful of the delicious cheesecake.
“So good,” he murmurs, looking right at me. “Perfect.”
I look down at my dessert, feeling my cheeks heat. It looks delicious, but so is he. What am I doing here? Why am I so attracted to him? I should be going for a quiet, gentle man, not an alpha biker, but here I am.
“Open,” he says, holding a spoonful of ice cream at my lips.
I grin and open my mouth, letting the creaminess melt on my tongue. “It’s good, but I think mine is better.”
“So do I,” he admits, eyeing my cheesecake.
I grin and ask while scooping more onto the spoon, “Do you want another bite?”
All of a sudden, my mouth and throat start tingling. I drop the spoon onto my plate and look up at him.
“Fuck,” I groan.
“What?” he asks, instantly alert.
“Are there peanuts in that?”
He looks down at his sundae. “Yeah, why?”
I grab my throat. “Oh, nothing, I’m just kind of allergic.”
He stands up, his chair falling over behind him, and he steps over to me and pulls me out of my chair. “What do I do? What the fuck do I do?”
“It’s not life threatening,” I say, grimacing. “I might break out in hives, though.” I pause. “Or get nauseous.”
“We’re going to the fuckin’ hospital,” he grits out, pulling out his phone in one hand, pulling me by my upper arm with the other.
So much for not ending the night on a bad note.
“You’ve been lecturing me for over an hour; can you just stop, please?” I groan, watching him pace up and down my hospital room. “I’m fine.”
“Don’t you think having an allergy like that is something you should mention when a man takes you out to eat?” he says for the second or third time.
I expel a deep sigh. “This shit could only happen to me.”
“Because you didn’t mention any allergy.” He stops the pacing to glare at me. “So I fed you my sundae, which had peanuts in it, which put you in the hospital. What a great fuckin’ first date.”
“At least it’s memorable,” I point out, which only makes him look like he wants to kill me. “Oh come on, it’s kind of funny. At least now that the itching has stopped.”
He points at me, then continues to pace. “You’re going to be the death of me, I know it.”
“Actually it looks like it’s me who’s going to end up dead,” I joke, pointing at the hospital bed.
“Valentina—”
“Ardan.”
He sits down on the end of my bed, looking completely out of place in his all-black getup and leather cut. “Do you want me to get you something to drink?”
“Some water would be great,” I say quietly.
He touches my ankle, then stands up. “I’ll be right back. Try to stay out of trouble until then.”
I curse myself for letting this happen and ruining the night. Ardan has handled everything so well, though, and I’m glad he’s here with me. Something inside me is telling me to give him a chance, that he’s worth it. Maybe I could keep myself a little detached just in case it doesn’t work out? I wish I could be like that, but I know I can’t. If I’m giving him my time, it’s because I like him and I think that there could be something between us. I’m drawn to him, and although a tiny part of me is very flighty right now, most of me wants to be near this man. Darren never looked after me when I was sick. In fact, if I were still with him, I’d be sitting in this room alone right now. I don’t think Ardan knows how thankful I am that he’s here, looking after me. It’s not something I’m really used to, and something I won’t be taking for granted.
He’s b
“Thank you.”
He cups my cheek. “You know, even sitting here in the damn hospital, I’d rather be with you than any other woman I know.”
I lean into his palm, enjoying the feeling of a man touching me like that, so tenderly. I haven’t had a man’s touch like this in so long, and I didn’t realize how much I crave it until right now. “I’m glad you’re here with me too,” I admit softly. “I don’t really have any friends here yet, so if this happened somewhere else, I’d be sitting here alone.”
“No, you wouldn’t,” he says, taking my phone from me. “Putting my number in your phone. You need me anytime, day or night, you call me, darlin’. From killing spiders to fixing your car, I got you.”
“I like spiders,” I say, smiling at his kind offer. “Thank you, Ardan.”
He hands back my phone and looks down at me on the bed. “Of course you like spiders. Now move over.”
I scoot over and he sits down on the bed. He tries to slide onto it, but only half his body fits.
“How tall are you?” I ask him, feeling amused.
“Six three. Why?”
“Just asking,” I say, laying my head on his shoulder. He wraps his arm around me and I smile and close my eyes. “This is the weirdest first date in the history of first dates.”
“Normal is boring,” he says, and I can hear the smile in his voice.
“They said I don’t have to stay overnight; I can go home after they do a checkup.”
“We’ll have to go to the restaurant and get my bike, then go and get your car from the bar,” he says. We took a taxi from the restaurant, because Ardan didn’t want me on the bike, just in case. “And then I’ll follow you home.” He pauses. “Or should I just take you home and we can get your car tomorrow?”
“I’m fine to drive,” I say, yawning. “I could go for some coffee, though.”
“I’ll get you some,” he says gently. “If you’re tired, you can have a nap until the nurse comes to check on you, if you like.”
“You’re comfortable,” I say, burying my face in his neck. “And you smell good.”
“Yeah, you should probably stop that,” he says in a husky tone, shifting in his spot. “I don’t think the nurse is going to appreciate walking in and seeing my hard-on straining against my jeans.”
Lifting my head, I look at him. “You’re probably right.” I take a deep breath and ask him, “What’s Ireland like?”
“Beautiful,” he says, turning animated. “You’d love it. The people, the views. The history. It’s all there to explore.”
“Hmmm,” I murmur. “Sounds perfect. I’ve always wanted to travel the world, but I’ve never even left the country.”
“Really?” He sounds surprised. “You should do it—see what’s out there, you know?”
“Yeah,” I say, moving even closer to him.
“Sleep.”
I sleep.
FIVE
“I DON’T like you staying here,” Ardan announces, looking around my motel room. “Especially not alone.”
I put my bag down on the couch, then turn to him and cross my arms. “Don’t care what you like. I’m staying here until I sort myself out. It’s really not a big deal.”
He goes and fiddles with the locks, scowling and muttering something about toddlers being able to break through them.
“No one is going to break in; it’s fine. Now I need to shower and go to sleep. And you need to go home.”
He straightens and turns, staring me down. “Fine. I’ll be here Friday evening to pick you up.” He closes the space between us and pushes one of my errant curls behind my ear. “You have my number. Anything happens, you call me. I’ll be here faster than the police ever will.” He grins. “And I’m scarier than them too.”
I grin at that.
“Nothing will happen,” I say, feeling a little flustered at his close proximity. “But I’ll call you if anything comes up.”
In the hospital bed, I’d been vulnerable and I let him in. But now, back in reality, I realize how stupid I was. I barely know this guy. He is so nice, though. So sweet. No one has ever fussed over me like that, and he’s seen me only twice.
Why is he like this?
A bad boy with a good heart.
I’m so fucked.
“Good,” he says, leaning forward and kissing me softly on the lips—barely a touch, but I feel it.
I feel it more than I’ve ever felt a kiss in my life.
I run my index finger along my bottom lip.
What the fuck was that?
I don’t know. But I want it again.
Ardan tilts his head and smiles, his dark eyes almost black. “And finally you feel it too.”
Another kiss, this time on the forehead, and he walks to my door. “Lock it, Valentina.”
I follow him and lock it the second he leaves. I hear a faint “Good girl,” before the sound of his steps becomes distant.
I turn around and look around the motel room, suddenly feeling . . . I don’t know, almost lost. I shake my head and walk to the bathroom. I need a shower and bed, and then I need to mentally distance myself from Ardan before Friday comes around.
How hard could it be?
“What are you doing?” I ask him as I step into the kitchen. He turns and grins. “You’re home early.” I put my bag down on the table and wrap my arms around him. “Something smells good.” I lift my head. “What’s the occasion? You never cook.”
He kisses the top of my head. “I was going to surprise you with a candlelit dinner. Why did you have to finish early on today of all days?”
I look toward the dining table, seeing four white candles sitting there in the center. “That’s so sweet, Darren.”
He puts the ladle down and grips my cheeks in his palms. “I love you so much. Just wanted to try to do something nice for you to show you I appreciate you.”
He kisses me, and I smile against his lips.
I wake up suddenly, panting and glancing around the motel room.
Fuck.
Something I’ve realized is that it isn’t always the bad memories that get you. Sometimes the good memories can do more damage, cause more pain, because they make you question yourself, and make you wonder where it all went wrong. When was the moment that it went bad? Can I pinpoint it?
I rub my eyes and then cover my face with my hands.
He’s still coming after me, in my dreams now. The only time I can’t control my thoughts.
And he’s not even hurting me in my dreams—no, he’s killing me with kindness and memories of good times.
My alarm goes off, and “The Hills” by the Weeknd starts to play. I listen to the entire song before making myself jump into the shower and wash my hair.
Time to get ready for work.
Fuck the past. It has no place here.
Friday comes around quickly, and I’ve found myself looking forward to tonight. If I’m being honest, I haven’t stopped thinking about Ardan since I last saw him. After work I drive home, take a quick shower, and get dressed in jeans and a white tank top. Since Ardan didn’t tell me where we were going, I wear flats instead of heels, aiming for comfort over sexiness. He messaged me a few times during the week, and I have to wonder what’s going through his mind.
Is he a man who likes the chase, but once he has me he loses interest? That’s the most likely situation, and I don’t know what to do about it. I like him. I like spending time with him. And I am excited to see him again. Yes, I am probably an idiot, but he is my only friend, and he’s pushed his way into my life thus far and it seems he intends to stay. A knock lets me know he’s here, so I grab my knit cardigan off the bed and unlock the door.
“Hey,” I say, brow furrowing as he steps inside, some tools in his hand. “What are you—”
“Putting in a better lock for you,” he says, pulling out a rectangular silver latch and holding it up against the door. “Won’t be but a few minutes.”
I open my mouth and then close it.
Who does stuff like this?
“You realize I won’t be staying here for long, like, at all,” I point out, watching as he drills a new high-tech lock in.
“Yup,” he replies. “But you’ll be safe for that time, now won’t you?”
I sigh and mutter, “You’re crazy,” to which he replies, “Fuckin’ batshit.”
When he’s done he turns around and grins, handing me the new key, which I put down on the table. “You look beautiful.”
“Thank you,” I tell him, touching his leather jacket. “I didn’t know where we were going tonight, so I wasn’t sure how dressy to get.”
“You’re perfect,” he says, pulling me against his hard body.
“You’re not so bad yourself. Thanks for the lock,” I say, lips kicking up at the corners. “Better than the normal, boring flowers most men bring.”
Ardan throws his head back and laughs. “Yeah, I guess you can say I’m not very traditional.”
I rest my face against his chest. “I’m more than okay with that.”
“Valentina,” he says in a quiet, deep tone. “You should probably stop touching me, unless you want to cancel tonight, because I’m about to lift you against the wall and fuck you.”
I shiver at the quiet sincerity in his voice, the sensual threat that has me biting my lip. I take a step back and lift my chin. “We better go, then.” I walk to the door and half turn so he can see my face. “But when we get back, I think our first time should be on the bed.” I smirk. “Then we can try the wall.”
I saunter out of the motel room, leaving him standing there, cursing under his breath. I smile to myself.
A few seconds later, he closes and locks the door, then grabs me and pushes me up against it. “Those words coming out of your beautiful, pouty mouth. Fuck. We better go before I give you exactly what you want, right now.” He steps back, leaving me feeling hot, my nipples hardening and my teeth sinking into my bottom lip.
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