by Dena Christy
He flicked on the bedroom light, and she clamped her eyes shut as the light hurt her eyes. Blinking several times she looked at him warily. He looked at her, with his hands held up and open as if to show her she had nothing to fear from him. Recognition managed to dispel the last lingering fragments of her nightmare, and she remembered who he was.
She sunk down on the edge of the bed, as it all came rushing back. He was a werewolf who’d bitten her, and had turned her into one. She’d managed to escape from some godforsaken building in the middle of Ottawa’s industrial district, and who knew if those responsible for putting her there were coming after her. She looked up at him and said the first thing that popped into her head.
“I’m well and truly fucked aren’t I?” She buried her face in her hands as the realization came that her life at the moment was worse than any nightmare she could ever have had.
“Kate, what is it? Did you have a bad dream or something?” He came over and sat beside her on the bed. He put what she assumed was meant to be a comforting hand on her shoulder, but she shrugged it away and got off the bed.
“Please don’t touch me. What did I do to you?”
“Kate, I don’t understand what you are asking me.” He stood and approached her, a look of concern on his face.
Anger rose inside her, and she couldn’t hold it back. “Why did you do it to me? Why did you bite me? Why did you ruin my life?” she screamed at him, and seeing the color draining out of his face did nothing to pull back the throttle on her rage. “What did I do? Tell me, what did I do to you?”
She charged at him, pushing against his chest. It was like trying to push a rock as her hands encountered the solid mass of muscle. She tried again, and still he didn’t move. She balled up her fist, drawing it back to hit him with it. He just stood there, and did nothing to stop her, and her punch landed ineffectually against his hard stomach.
“Why are you letting me do this? Why won’t you fight back?” She had no idea where all this anger was coming from. She was not a confrontational person under normal circumstances, but then her life circumstances had changed drastically, so maybe that was it.
“You can punch, push me, and do whatever you want. I’m not going to retaliate. You can do your worst to me if it will help you feel better,” he said, his voice a calm center in the storm raging inside her.
She started trembling, and a lump formed itself in the middle of her throat. Great, now she was going to start bawling. This was worse than a raging case of PMS. She felt so irrational and out of control and the only person she could cling to was him. She looked up at him as her lower lip trembled, and she hugged her arms around her middle.
“Oh sweetheart,” he whispered as he drew her to him. His strong arms came around her, and the solid wall of his chest offered her comfort when before it had offered her only frustration. “I know you don’t think so now, but it will get better. You’ve gone through a shit load of garbage in the past couple of days, and I wish I could say there wasn’t more to come.”
She slid her arms around his waist, and the weight of everything she’d gone through since she’d woken up in that room, slammed through her. There was no holding back that first sob and it was followed by more. She squeezed her arms around him, and he tightened his hold. He held her, saying nothing, until the storm of emotion she was feeling burned itself out. She sagged against him, as if the rage, fear and despair she’d felt in the past few minutes was the only thing that had held her up, and when it was gone, she had nothing left inside to keep her on her feet.
He scooped her up and sat on the edge of the bed, cradling her on his lap.
“Why is this happening? I’m not normally like this,” she said quietly as she rested her head on his chest. The strong, steady beat of his heart soothed her, and she closed her eyes.
“First, you have a right to feel anyway you want. You’ve gone through a lot, and I cannot tell you how deeply I regret my part in it.”
“I know, but why am I acting like this? I never get that out of control. Is it because I’m a werewolf now? Am I going to feel turbo PMS all the time now?” She lifted her head and looked at him. The side of his mouth kicked up and her breath caught in her throat at what that small softening affect did to his face.
“I don’t think you’ll feel turbo PMS all the time. The moon is getting full, and all wolves get a little cranky when it’s close. You will eventually be able to control it better as you get more experience. Your first transition will help a lot with that.”
“Is the moon responsible for everything I’m feeling?” she asked as she reached up and touched his face. The urge to kiss him almost overwhelmed her. His pupils dilated slightly as he looked at her, and she knew he was feeling it too.
“The moon amplifies feelings that are already there, so while you feel things more strongly under the moon’s influence, it doesn’t manufacture feelings. So whatever you feel is all you, the moon just turns up the volume,” he said as his eyes flicked down to her lips.
It didn’t appear that he was going to make the first move, and she couldn’t wait for him to do it, so she slid her hand around to the back of his head and pulled down. It was much easier to move him this time than it had been last time. Her lips met his, and his hands tightened where they had rested loosely at her waist. Desire slammed through her and she buried her hands in his hair. This kiss, a simple meeting of mouths, blossomed into something deeper. She could not get close enough to him, and pressed herself tightly against him.
His hands moved up her body to frame her face, and he took over the kiss. He dominated her with his lips and tongue, and she loved every moment of it. It seemed like a cliché but she could swear that she could hear bells ringing in her head.
He pulled away from her, and she whimpered. She wasn’t ready for him to stop. She heard the bells again, and realized the sound wasn’t in her head at all, but coming from the front of the house.
He groaned as his forehead came down to rest on hers. She still had her hands buried in his hair and she relaxed her grip.
“I don’t suppose there’s any chance they’ll go away,” she asked, only half joking. Rationally she knew she only just met him, she’d been on an emotional roller coster and sleeping with him was probably the last thing she should do. The clawing desire in the pit of her stomach wasn’t rational, and it was probably a good thing they’d been interrupted.
“No. That’ll be Nick. I’ll go get it, and you can join us in a few if you need some time to yourself.”
He eased back, but made no move to let her go. She kissed him lightly on the lips as the door bell rang again. She eased herself off his lap and got shakily to her feet. He got to his feet beside her and moved toward the door. She reached out for his hand, and held it. He looked down at her, a question in his eyes.
“Can we do this together?” she asked as she moved to stand beside him, refusing to relinquish her hold on his hand. She had a feeling that whoever was on the other side of the front door would bring more changes to her life, and she needed an anchor. Rowan had shown that he was steady and strong during her onslaught of crazy emotions, and she needed him to provide that steady support to get her through what was surely coming.
“Absolutely,” he said as he raised her hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to her palm. “I’ll be here for you as long as you need me.”
Chapter 4
Rowan was hyper aware of Kate’s small hand nestled in his much larger one. He meant it when he told her he would be there for her for as long as she needed him. At first he would have assured her out of his own sense of guilt, and there was still a remaining sense of remorse in his gut when he thought about what his actions had brought to her life. But there was something else there as well. Her rage at him, had loosened up some of what he’d bottled up inside. Letting her push and punch him, had helped him feel that she’d been able to express some of the anger at what he had done, and by accepting it from her without fighting or excuses, was he
lping him move past it. Wallowing in his own despair and hopelessness was not going to do her any good. She needed him to be stronger than that.
He led her from the bedroom, and he glanced at her slightly swollen mouth. Her kiss had thrown him for a loop for a second. He was well aware of the desire he felt for her, but he hadn’t realized that she reciprocated it until she’d kissed him. He didn’t know whether to thank his brother, or kick him in the ass for his untimely interruption. He wanted to continue kissing and touching her for hours, but it was probably for the best that they didn’t carry on. At least for now.
The doorbell rang again just as they made it to the living room.
“I’m coming,” he yelled as he tried to disengage Kate’s hand so he could leave her in the living room, and go answer the door. She refused to let go, and her face had turned slightly pale. He turned fully toward her. “Kate. It’s going to be okay. Nothing on the other side of that door is going to hurt you. I swear.”
She turned her face up towards him, and what else he was going to say flew right out the window. He pulled her toward him, and kissed her swiftly, branding himself on her lips. The kiss was quick and potent, and when he pulled away she looked at him slightly dazed.
“Nothing and no one is going to hurt you, not on my watch. Sit, relax and I’ll get the door. Okay?”
She nodded her head, and she sat on the couch with her hands resting in her lap. Rowan walked toward the front door before his brother could ring the damn bell again.
He pulled the door open and came up short. His brother Eric, along with his woman Samara, stood on the other side of the door.
“What are you two doing here?” he asked as he stepped aside.
“Nick can’t make it, and he wants you to bring her to headquarters. What took you so long to answer the door?” Eric asked as he brushed past him. Rowan saw Samara nudge his brother in the ribs, and she wiggled her eyebrows at him. Eric took a closer look at him, and Rowan could feel a flush creeping up his face. He was positive that Samara could sense exactly what had been going on before he’d come to the door, since she was half succubus, and her kind was very good at reading emotion. His brother must have clued in because he grinned at him like some kind of mongrel.
“You dirty dog,” Eric said as he raised his hand for a fist bump. Rowan rolled his eyes.
“Just shut up,” Samara said to him as she elbowed him out of the way so she could hug Rowan. “Ignore him. He’s the dirty dog. I honestly don’t know what I see in him.”
“I’ll show it to you later,” his brother quipped, and it was apparent that nothing would dispel his good mood.
“Nick and Cadric thought it would be a good idea for me to come over with him, since she might be more comfortable with a woman. I’m guess that we needn’t have worried about that, since it appears she’s in good hands with you.”
“Come on in, and I’ll introduce you to her. Hopefully Eric will display more manners than he has so far.” Rowan turned and walked toward the living room. Kate sat where he had left her, and she looked anxiously at him, until a puzzled frown knotted her forehead as she looked from him to Eric.
“You and your brother Nick are twins?” she asked. She started slightly when Samara came striding up to the couch and sat down beside her. She edged over and Rowan’s first instinct was to step in, and it was only Eric’s hand on his arm that stayed him.
“That’s not Nick, that’s Eric. I’m Samara,” Samara said gently as she held out her hand. Kate looked at Rowan for a moment before taking the other woman’s hand.
“I’m Kate, and apparently I’m a werewolf. Are you one too?”
“Only half. It’s a long story and I’ll tell you sometime. I don’t think Rowan told you, but I work for the same organization as Nick, and our boss would like you to come down to headquarters.”
“No,” Kate said as she stood, and she glanced fleetingly at Rowan before she left the room.
Samara looked dumbfounded as she watched Kate go. “What did I say?”
“I told her Nick would come here to talk to her, and if anyone had informed me of the change of plans I could have prepared her for it. I know that you think the Cadric can get whatever he wants whenever he wants, but if you knew what has happened to her, you’d understand her hesitation to go anywhere with anyone she doesn’t know.”
“Why don’t you tells us what happened then?” Eric said as he walked over to the couch and put a soothing hand on Samara’s arm.
“About twenty four hours ago she woke up in a strange room, not knowing where the hell she was. She had to escape by stealing a car, and while she was stealing said car she watched two wolves turn back into humans. Not to mention that she followed a strange signal in her head that led her here, and found out that her life has turned upside down. She learned that not only are werewolves real, but that she is one. She’s running on very little sleep, and to top it off she’s having nightmares. She’s not going anywhere tonight, and if you think you’re going to take her, you’re going to have to go through me.” Rowan took an aggressive step forward, and that was enough for Eric to do the same. The two men faced each other, and it took Samara’s hand on Eric’s arm to get him to back down. Rowan looked over at her. “You’re not taking her anywhere tonight. If she wants to meet with the Order, I will bring her to headquarters, but it has to be her choice. Are we clear?”
A low growl rumbled in Eric’s throat, and apparently he didn’t like the tone Rowan used with his woman. Rowan didn’t care, since he needed to make it clear that Kate had every right to make the decision to get involved with the Order herself. So many choices had been taken from her already, and he wasn’t going to be party to taking any more from her.
“We’re clear,” Samara said quietly. “I should have realized that she would have been through too much to want to jump into more. I’ve gone through the change myself, and while I’m sure I don’t feel everything that she has, since in my case the werewolf blood is diluted, I can appreciate how this would be overwhelming to anyone. I’ll let Nick and Cadric know that Kate will be calling the shots. We only want to help her, and I hope you let her know that. Just call Nick if she decides to come in.” Samara put her hand in Eric’s and looked over at him. “Your babies are getting hungry,” she said as she rubbed her other hand on her slightly protruding belly.
Rowan would have laughed if he’d been in the mood at seeing his brother’s quick about face. He couldn’t hustle his woman out the door fast enough once she mentioned that she or his babies might need something. Samara tossed a look over her shoulder as they went by, mouthing goodnight with a smile, and Rowan blew out a relieved breath.
“Are they gone?” Kate’s quiet voice came from behind him. He turned and held out his hand to her. She took it, and he pulled her into his arms.
“They’re gone, and we won’t be going anywhere tonight. If you want to meet with the Order, I’ll take you.”
“What’s the Order?” she asked curiously, as she rested her head on his chest. She didn’t seem to want him to let her go, and frankly he wasn’t inclined to do so.
“The organization that Nick and Samara work for. Basically they police supernatural creatures, keep them from wreaking havoc on the human world.”
Kate pulled back in alarm. “Is that why they want me to go there? Are they afraid of what I might do?”
“No sweetheart. I think what they want to do is find out who was holding you in that building. If you don’t want to meet them, you don’t have to.”
She relaxed back against him. “They police supernatural creatures? You mean there’s more out there than werewolves?”
“Yep. When Samara said she was half werewolf, she didn’t mention that she’s also half demon.”
“You mean demons exist too? What about vampires?”
“Yes, there are vampires too.”
“I really wish I hadn’t asked. This is just a bit too much for me to take in.” Kate pulled back from him, and for a mome
nt he felt the loss as she went over to the couch. She looked up at him. “Thank you.”
“For what?” he asked as he sat down beside her. She reached out and took his hand. He didn’t know why it was, but it seemed that neither of them could stand not to have contact with the other.
“For taking my side. I’m sure it must have been hard to go against your family. I hope I haven’t caused problems with them. I just couldn’t handle anymore tonight.”
“I know, which is why I told them no. I told them that you have to make your own choices.”
“I know you said you’d take me, but if I do decide to meet with them, will you stay with me?”
“Of course, I have no intention of leaving you there on your own. You let me know and I’ll make the arrangements when you’re ready.”
“I’m too tired to think about anything right now,” she said as she closed her eyes and rested her head against the back of the couch. After a few minutes her even breathing told Rowan that she’d fallen asleep. He scooped her up in his arms and carried her back to his bedroom. As he lay her down, she stirred and looked up at him.
“Stay. Keep me safe,” she said, and he lay down beside her on the bed. It was clear to both of them that tonight wasn’t about sex, it was about comfort. She needed to feel safe, and he needed to keep her safe. He pulled a blanket over both of them as she rolled on her side away from him. He put his arm around her waist, and pulled her against him. He pressed a kiss on the side of her neck before settling in behind her.
“Go to sleep sweetheart,” he whispered as he felt her relax against him. He closed his eyes and followed her into slumber.
* * *
Kate reached out along the bed and her hand found nothing but empty air and blankets. She opened her eyes and looked beside her, and the dent in the pillow next to hers told her that she hadn’t dreamed of Rowan holding her in the night. The light peeking through the blinds told her that the morning was marching on, and she forced herself to sit up. She still felt groggy and obviously she still hadn’t caught up on her sleep. She frowned down at the clothes she was wearing, the ones she’d stolen out of that woman’s locker, and desperately wished she had something else to wear.
