Settling Ashes: A New Adult/College Romance (The Ashes Series Book 2)

by Gardin, Diana

  SETTLING ASHES

  An Ashes Novel

  By Diana Gardin

  COPYRIGHT © 2014 BY DIANA GARDIN

  All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the expressed written consent of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  This is a work of fiction. All characters and events portrayed are either products of the author’s imagination or are fictitious.

  E-book Edition

  Cover Art designed by Stephanie Mooney www.mooneydesigns.net

  Editing completed by Katrina O’Brien

  TABLE OF CONTENTS

  Dedication

  One

  Two

  Three

  Four

  Five

  Six

  Seven

  Eight

  Nine

  Ten

  Eleven

  Twelve

  Thirteen

  Fourteen

  Fifteen

  Sixteen

  Seventeen

  Eighteen

  Nineteen

  Twenty

  Twenty-One

  Twenty-Two

  Epilogue

  About The Author

  Acknowledgements

  Dedication

  This book is dedicated to everyone who fell in love with Clay and Paige the first time around. I hope you are left, at the end of this story, as happy with their ending as I am.

  “Hold onto hope, love

  I searched high and low for you

  Each day gets closer, so hold on stronger

  To me

  And you.”

  Hold Onto Hope Love, Amy Stroup

  One

  Paige

  I stared out the blurry window, the drizzle cutting wavy streaks down the glass. The day was gray and dreary, perfect weather to match my mood. It had been that way for a while now. Four weeks and three days, to be exact.

  Four weeks and three days of gray.

  Gray.

  Gray.

  Gray.

  “Stop it, Paige,” Beau ordered from beside me. He removed one hand from the steering wheel and placed it on my knee, squeezing gently. “Stop thinking about him. It’s pain you don’t need to keep reliving.”

  I sighed. “If I could, I would. But he’s in jail, Beau. How am I supposed to deal with that?”

  “He’s not in jail,” Beau pointed out, stealing a sideways glance at me. “He made bail, remember? He made bail, and he’s at home, or going to classes, or doing whatever the hell he’s doing. He’s not your problem anymore, Paige.”

  The last sentence he spoke escaped on a pleading note, and I knew how desperately he wanted to whisk my mind away from the subject of Clay Forbes.

  It was an impossible task. Clay Forbes owned my mind.

  He owned my body and my heart, too, but that was another matter completely.

  We pulled into the parking lot of the complex where Beau had been renting an apartment for the past six months. I hadn’t even known he was so close to Rutherford. The man was full of surprises. Including the one where he was still in love with me, after all the time that had passed since we were last together.

  Fourteen months ago, my home had burned down in a tragic fire. My entire family had burned with the house. All I had left in the world was Gillian, my best friend for most of my life. And right now, I didn’t even have her. I’d left her a note when I fled Rutherford a month ago, explaining that I had to go and not to look for me.

  I knew she’d be worried sick, but I had to leave. I had to get away from…all of it.

  “Do you think he killed Hannah?” I asked in a small voice as we sat in the car.

  Beau cut the engine, and he turned to face me. His sigh was heavy; his expression was somehow grim and soft at the same time.

  “I honestly don’t know, sweetheart,” he said softly. “I don’t know the guy. You do. So do you think he has it in him?”

  “No,” I said, without hesitation. “But then, I didn’t think he had it in him to sleep with her while he was supposedly in love with me, either.”

  Beau reached out and stroked my face. I leaned into his hand, grateful for his comfort.

  Beau had been here for me this time. He hadn’t been the last time I needed him, but that was mostly my fault. When I lost everything I loved, I pushed him away too. I knew that he shouldn’t have to deal with my grief; he was eighteen. He had a life to live, and my gift to him was to allow him to live it freely.

  But now Beau was all grown up. He was a man, and a really good one. He knew what to say to make the hole in my heart seem smaller, if only for a little while.

  He got out of the car and came around to my side to open the door. He broke into a crooked smile, pulling his baseball cap a little lower over his face.

  “So, what are you making me for dinner tonight, girl?” he drawled.

  I cracked the tiniest of smiles. “Whoever makes it to the apartment door first gets to sit on their butt on the couch and watch the other one cook.”

  I took off running, squealing as I heard Beau curse and tear off after me. I beat him to the door, but only because he let me win. That was the thing about Beau. No matter what the stakes, if he thought it would make me happy he’d always let me win.

  Two hours and a sink full of dishes later, Beau and I were sitting on the couch, stuffed full of Hamburger Helper. It was the only thing he knew how to make.

  “So, you have homework to do, or do you want to watch a movie?” asked Beau.

  “Don’t you have to be at the power company early in the morning?”

  “Always,” he answered. “But if I go to bed right now, I’m just going to be thinking about you. So I might as well stay up and look at you a little longer.”

  I shifted in my seat. When Beau talked like that, ghosts of the past rose in front of me. Memories and feelings from our time together I wasn’t anywhere near ready to deal with yet. I couldn’t embark on the leap with him that he wanted me to. He never put pressure on me, either. He just made it clear how he felt.

  “Beau,” I began.

  “Don’t, Paige. OK? It’s cool. You’re not ready yet. I’m going to make damn sure you are one day. Now, movie or homework?”

  “I don’t have an assignment to work on tonight,” I admitted.

  The U of R was compliant enough to let me work on my coursework from a distance, due to the “personal difficulties” I had claimed to be experiencing. I just couldn’t be there in that town right now with everything that was going on. I knew I’d have to go back eventually. I couldn’t just leave Gillian like that forever. And one day, I’d need closure with Clay.

  They had no idea where I was. I’d left no trace for them to follow, and I was only two towns south of them. Two towns in the opposite direction of my hometown of Simpsonville. I’d left my cell phone back in my and Gillian’s apartment and I’d stopped using my credit card. So they didn’t have the first clue where to look.

  I wanted it that way, for now.

  “What movie?” Beau prompted, reaching for me. “Your pick.”

  “Beau,” I said, giggling as he squeezed the ticklish spot on my upper arm. “You always let me pick. Aren’t you craving the general blowing up of things?”

  “Yep,” he answered promptly. “But I know you hate all the blowing up of things. So, you pick.”

  “I want to watch that Nicholas Sparks movie, where the girl runs away from her ex and ends up by the beach with a new hottie.’”

&n
bsp; “Oh, my God, Paige, if I have to watch that movie one more time I’m going to scratch my damn eyeballs out.”

  The pained expression in his eyes brought a burst of laughter to my throat.

  “Fine,” I said. “Then you need to pick a movie for once.”

  He sighed, heaving himself off the couch. I couldn’t help checking him out as he moved. Beau wasn’t the skinny teenage boy he was when I’d seen him last. He’d grown up for miles since then, and it showed in his physique. He’d grown about four inches since last year, and he had a very physical job at the power company. He woke up before the sun every morning and went to the gym in our apartment complex, and I was reaping the benefits of that exercise every time he put those muscular arms around me and squeezed.

  I tore my eyes away from him as he squatted to open the entertainment cabinet. Looking at Beau that way made me a cheater. I hadn’t spoken to Clay in over a month, but I’d still be a cheater if anything happened with Beau, because I’d never had any closure with Clay.

  Even thought the last time I’d seen him, he’d been all wrapped up in bed with a very naked Hannah Davis.

  Whose body was found dead the very next morning.

  Hence, the murder charge now hanging over his head like the blade of a guillotine.

  Beau popped back up after inserting the DVD into the player and loped back to the couch. He sat down next to me, pulling a blanket over both of us.

  “Relax, Paige,” he whispered into my ear. “For one night, just relax. I got you.”

  I nodded my head, tears suddenly stinging my eyes for some reason I couldn’t fathom.

  “I know.”

  When my eyes fluttered open, I was floating.

  “Shhh,” Beau whispered. “You’ll be in bed in a second.”

  “Shoot,” I mumbled. “Did I miss the movie?”

  “Yes,” he said, a smile tugging on his lips. “I’m sure you’re just devastated.”

  I snuggled into his chest, letting his comfortable warmth envelope me. “Not even a little bit.”

  He entered his bedroom, the only bedroom in the apartment. He’d been letting me sleep there since I arrived while he claimed the couch. Guilt swallowed me every time I awoke and saw the messy blankets covering the cushions each morning after he’d already left for work.

  He laid me in the bed and pulled the sheet up over me.

  “Goodnight, Paige. See you in the morning. Please, only sweet dreams tonight.”

  “Goodnight, Beau. I always try.”

  Clay

  “Dude, you’ve gotta get your shit together,” Drew chided.

  “There isn’t enough liquor in this whole damn bar to make me forget about her, Drew.” I leaned back on my stool, surveying the bar.

  Every time I went out, I was just waiting for Paige to walk in. She never did.

  “It’s been a whole fucking month, Drew,” I growled, frustrated. “Where could she be? When is she coming home?”

  Drew sipped his beer. “She needs time. She just went through a major trauma months before this happened. She couldn’t handle all of the drama, man. Do you blame her?”

  “Hell no, I don’t blame her. But the fact that she’s out there alone, thinking that me and Hannah…” My voice broke. “It’s killing me, Drew. It’s fucking killing me.”

  He reached over and slapped my back. Drew had never loved a girl, never even dated one as long as I’d known him. He was exactly the way I used to be, with a different girl in his bed every weekend. Lately he’d been more elusive about who the girls in his bed were. For what reason, I didn’t know. Maybe he didn’t want me to feel worse about losing Paige. But even though he had never been where I was now, he understood something about what I was going through.

  Drew and I were similar in size and stature. We both had brown hair, though he woe his longer than I did. Mine was short, and spiked with product, while his lazily grazed his collar. Years of playing soccer had left us both long and lean, but Drew had me in height by about two inches. My light blue eyes were a shade brighter than his hazel ones, but we were confused for brothers more often than not.

  “You’ll get through this, man,” Rob chimed in from my other side. The gleam of lights in the bar bounced off of his chocolate brown, bald head as he aimed a sympathetic smile at me. That smile would have had every pair of panties nearby eagerly dropping, had he been interested in casual flings. But he wasn’t; Rob was better than that. Which made him better than Drew and I both.

  That is, the me Pre-Paige.

  Both my childhood best friends, on either side of me, was how it had always been. Only my heart had been ripped out of my chest and I was bleeding out slowly, every day that Paige was gone.

  “You both seem to have to say that to me a lot lately,” I sighed.

  I watched as a cluster of girls stared at me from across the room. They moved their eyes toward the staircase right next to my barstool. They clearly wanted to go to the dance club that occupied the top floor of Matchstick’s, but were terrified to walk past my seat.

  People were giving me a wide berth these days. It was like nothing I’d ever experienced, but I couldn’t care less that I was a leper. All I cared about was the fact that Paige was gone, and I could be going to prison for the rest of my life for a murder I didn’t commit.

  “My parents are coming in a few days,” I admitted quietly. “My dad has been sending his lawyer down to work my case, you know, but now he feels like things are getting out of hand. I told him that this isn’t Ohio, that he doesn’t have the clout here that he does up there.”

  “Oh, he’ll have clout alright,” Rob answered. “Your dad’s the kind of guy that gets shit done. No matter whether he’s in Ohio or DC or anywhere else. I hope he can help.”

  “Yeah, me too,” I admitted. “I just wish my mom didn’t have to come with him.”

  Drew nodded sympathetically. “Yeah. I’d feel that way too if I had your mom.”

  I glanced at the door again, and when I did my breath caught in my chest because Gillian, Tima, and Maven walked through it. I still wasn’t used to seeing them without Paige and my face fell when my heart caught up to my head and I realized the girls were now a threesome.

  Gillian headed straight for my barstool.

  “Well?” she asked. That was Gillian; she always got straight to the point. She didn’t glance at either Rob or Drew.

  “No, Gill,” I sighed. “I haven’t heard anything.”

  “What the hell is the point of coming from a family with money if you don’t have any connections, Clay? Why haven’t you hired a private investigator?” The disgust in her voice was blatant, even without the curl of her lip as she eyed me.

  To Gillian, I was less than the dirt under her designer heels.

  “Gillian, you said it already. My parents are the ones with the money. And my father is very concerned with…appearances. He wouldn’t give me money for a P.I. Not in a million years. They don’t even know Paige. All this shit went down before I got the chance to introduce them.”

  Gillian ran a hand through her chestnut brown hair and groaned. “I hate this so much, Clay. And I still blame you. Completely.”

  “Easy, Gill,” Drew said, touching her arm. “Can’t you see he’s wallowing right now? You don’t need to make it worse.”

  She turned to him, green eyes blazing. “The hell I don’t! He needs every damn bit of motivation I can give him to find my best friend. I know you didn’t kill Hannah, Clay, and that you’re going through hell right now with the legal stuff. But Paige is still missing. I don’t even know if I should go to the police at this point.”

  “Whoa,” Rob said. “You want to go to the police and tell them that Clay’s current girlfriend is missing, while he’s in hot water for the murder of his ex-girlfriend?”

  “Well,” Gillian said reluctantly. “I guess that wouldn’t look so good for you, Clay. So I won’t. But I’m not going to wait forever. Find her, dammit.”

  She turned on her h
ot pink stiletto and stalked away, pulling Tima and Maven with her. Tima threw a sympathetic frown over her shoulder at Rob as they went upstairs.

  “What am I doing here?” I sputtered. “She’s absolutely right. I should be looking for Paige, not drinking at a bar!”

  “Dude, if she wanted you to find her, you would have already,” Drew pointed out. “What are you going to do? Knock on doors? You’ve exhausted all your resources. She’s not online, she’s not using her card, and she doesn’t have her phone. Short of doing what Gillian said and hiring someone, I don’t know what else we can do.”

  I slapped a bill on the counter and stood. “I’m done tonight. I’ll see you at home.”

  I pushed through the door of the bar, and icy cold winter air hit my face as I strode toward my SUV.

  I couldn’t just sit around and do nothing, acting like everything was normal. Nothing was normal. I was accused of murder, and my reason for breathing was gone. I had to fix it.

  I was going to talk to my dad about hiring a P.I. when he arrived. I was going to find my girl, and bring her home.

  Because I wasn’t going to get through any of this without her.

  Two

  Paige

  I stared at the computer screen, my eyes slightly glazed over. The article title read “Ohio Governor’s Son Accused of Murder in College Town.”

  I’d decided to check the news stories in Clay’s hometown newspaper this morning, and the headline ripped through my brain like a blaze of fury. I had no idea Clay’s father was the governor of Ohio. He’d never bothered to mention it. And now I was wondering whether I had really known Clay Forbes at all.

  We’d spent so much time together after we met at the campus bookstore at the end of summer. Classes began, and Clay had pursued me furiously, claiming that he wanted me and only me. We’d fallen in love, albeit quickly, but deeply. We understood each other, better than anyone else in our lives ever had before.

  It was all a lie. He had wanted Hannah, too.

  The newspaper article stated that he was the governor of Ohio’s son. That he came from a strong political family with a lot of money. And I didn’t know about any of it.