Romancing the Paranormal

by Stephanie Rowe

  Why didn’t she ever giggle at anything I said? Where in the Hell did that come from? I pressed my fingers to the bridge of my nose and went back to the paperwork in front of me. Astrid, my only and least favorite cousin at the moment, had decided Raquel and I would work with Samuel together. It would force us not to kill each other, or so she thought. She was wrong.

  I knew if need be I could distract Sammy with something shiny and dismember my foe in two seconds flat. The major problem with that scenario was that she could potentially do the same thing to me. I might outweigh and outmuscle her, but her rabid desire to maim couldn’t be discounted.

  She was dangerous to my concentration, my life and most definitely my libido.

  “Do you remember what I told you about pi? What a big number it is?” she asked Samuel as she pointed to a passage in a book.

  Sammy closed his eyes and slammed his chunky little hands over the numbers.

  “The first fifty numbers in dethimal digits are 3.1415926535 8979323846 2643383279 5028841971 6939937510. Is me right?” he asked as he peeked under his hand.

  “Um, yes,” Raquel choked out. “How did you know that? We haven’t learned that yet.”

  “Me debided some stuff in my head, silly Raquel.” He laughed and pulled on her red curls as he popped his thumb into his mouth with satisfaction.

  “Very good,” she whispered as her eyes caught mine in shock.

  Did this kid even need us? Well he needed me, but his brain was a sieve. Maybe Raquel could go back to her dungeon and leave me to work with Samuel.

  “Looks like he’s smarter than you,” I said as I got ready to duck in case the textbook came flying.

  “Looks like you’re still an ass,” she shot back.

  “Ass ass ass ass ass ass ass,” Sammy chimed in gleefully as Raquel closed her eyes and dropped her head to the table in defeat.

  Damn it, that was my fault, not hers. She would not get in trouble for teaching him the word ass when I goaded her into it.

  “Samuel, an ass is a donkey--an animal similar to a horse. Aunt Raquel was referring to me as a strong and masterful horse with all of the massive parts that a horse has. She has hung a great honor on my head. Do you understand?” I asked. My double entendre was not lost on my enemy as she bit back a laugh and pretended to throw up. Grinning, I shrugged and blew her a kiss. Furthermore, I was not in the mood to be chastised for expanding his swearing vocabulary. His mother, Astrid was doing just fine with that on her own.

  Raquel rolled her eyes dramatically swallowed her grin. However, she said nothing. Astrid had threatened to remove tongues if her boy learned new potty words. I liked my tongue and God knew I liked hers.

  “Yes, Sammy,” she agreed with me. “Although Heathcliff is a donkey. Donkeys are much smaller than horses in every way. In fact many would call them puny—tiny, puny and inconsequential. Unable to satisfy the needs of anything.”

  “That no make sense,” Sammy said as he looked at me strangely.

  “Trust me, little man.” Raquel laughed wickedly. “It makes perfect sense.”

  It was a tie. God, she was fun to spar with. I couldn’t remember the last time a woman had challenged me both in and out of the bedroom. Only problem was that we despised each other outside of the bedroom. Well, she despised me…

  “Let’s get back to work, little man,” she said as she cuddled him and opened a thin volume of poetry.

  “Raquel,” Sammy whispered as he captured her face in his small hands. “Me love you so much.”

  He covered her cheeks in wet kisses and I froze as I watched the adoration shine from her eyes. She was childlike in her delight—innocent and young. Something in my gut clenched and I didn’t like it or want it. Raquel needed to stay inhuman to me. I couldn’t deal with anything more than what I perceived and wanted her to be—if I did it might destroy me. She pressed her forehead to his and held him tight.

  “You no have to sleep anymore,” he told her. He traced the sprinkling of freckles on her nose with his little finger as she paled and gaped at him.

  “What?” she asked softly.

  “You can love and not sleep. It be okay. You have to trust, silly pretty auntie.” He grinned as she shook her head in confusion.

  What the Hell was going on here?

  “Samuel, what are you talking about?” Her mood changed abruptly. She was tense and extremely uncomfortable.

  “You know.” He giggled and buried his face in her neck. “It be time to stop sleeping. Too dangerous now.”

  Her manner had altered dramatically. She went from vulnerable and scared to strong and somewhat cold. Putting Samuel in the chair beside her, she stood and paced. She stopped dead in her tracks as she saw me observing her.

  “You’re still here,” she said with unhappy surprise.

  “Never left,” I replied wondering what had just happened.

  Samuel watched with curiosity as she circled the room. He cocked his head to the side and winked at me.

  “Heathcwiff be the one to wake you up,” he said with conviction.

  “No,” Raquel barked as Samuel ignored her and giggled. “Enough, Sammy. We are done for today. Heathcliff, please return him to his parents.”

  With a mumbled goodbye she raced from the room.

  Closing the folder, I sat for a brief moment and pondered how to go about getting the information I wanted. No sleeping? I would wake her? What the Hell did that mean? I slowly crossed the room to a very calm and composed Samuel. He looked quite pleased with himself. The puzzle was killing me.

  “Would you like to tell me what that was about?” I asked as I squatted in front of the boy genius.

  He raised his eyebrows and gave me a look so reminiscent of his father I had to bite back a laugh.

  “Is not Sammy’s story to tell,” he said as he put his thumb back in his mouth and watched me with narrowed eyes.

  “But you might save Raquel some time if you let me in on the secret,” I said logically. How hard was it to pry something out of a six month old child? Apparently very hard…

  “You try to be tricky, Heathcwiff,” Sammy yelled gleefully. “You no get me! Me too smart for you!”

  “That you are, my little man. That you are.”

  ***

  “If you stopped playing hide the salami with her, daring her to do stupid shit and actually got to know her you’d probably save us a lot of money in home furnishings,” Astrid said as she pulled me toward the Grand Ballroom. “I hate these fucking cocktail parties. I can’t drink anything and so many of these Vamps bore me to tears.”

  “I have no clue what you mean,” I insisted as I picked up my pace and tried to drag her into the ballroom so the conversation would end.

  “Give me a break. Anyone with ears, bionic or not, could hear you two going at it this morning. Quit yanking on my arm,” she snapped. “You know you like her. I can tell. I noticed it when we offed all those Demons at the Caves a couple of months ago.”

  Jesus, I didn’t need this.

  “I do not like her. She is rude and violent and…”

  “And smokin’ hot and you totally like her. Nothing gets by me,” she informed me with a huge grin. “I think she’s your mate.”

  “And I think you’re smoking crack,” I shot back.

  My mate? Bullshit. I didn’t need a mate who would joyously kill me when my back was turned. I didn’t need a mate who threw Ming vases for a hobby. I didn’t need a mate at all. Period. I was single, lonely and loving it. Wait. I was single and loving it.

  “Not smoking crack.” Astrid grinned and punched me in the arm. “Can’t breathe—can’t smoke. That’s how I got into this shit show to start with.”

  Astrid had been turned into a Vamp when she went to a hypnotist to stop smoking and ended up undead. One of the strangest turnings I’d ever heard of, but what was done was done. She was clearly meant to be one of us as she was a True Immortal.

  “Astrid,” I said with a smile through clenched teeth. “Wh
ile I appreciate your concern, Raquel is not my mate. I don’t like her and she most definitely doesn’t like me. I’d go as far to say that she hates me. So I can assure there will be no mating any time in the near future.”

  “You know, my cousin,” she purred as we entered the ballroom, effectively ending our appalling talk. “There is a very thin line between love and hate.”

  I despised it when she got the last word in.

  Chapter 3

  The ballroom was filled with Vampyres dressed to kill. No pun intended. Many were leaving the compound in Kentucky tomorrow for Europe to attend a yearly summit with the Angels. I expected Raquel to leave with them as she was the Princess of the European territory. The thought of her leaving left an unsettled feeling inside me that I decided to ignore. A bare bones contingency of fifty would stay behind to protect Prince Ethan, Astrid and Samuel. I was happy to have an excuse to get out of meeting with the Angels. Angelic? Yes. Pleasant? No.

  “Oh my Hell,” Astrid muttered as she glanced around the ballroom. “This clusterfuck makes me want to chew glass and swallow it.”

  I had to agree but I stayed mum. Vampyre politics were a bore and watching the sucking up and posturing got tiresome.

  “There’s a band,” I observed. “I suppose there will be dancing.”

  “Thank God. I should have invited Mother Nature. She would have twerked and scared the shit out of everyone. Would have cleared the room in a minute flat,” she said with an evil grin.

  Astrid’s grandmother on her father’s side was Mother Nature—the most delightfully insane woman in existence. Of course there would have been twerking and pole dancing, but there would have also been a forest exploding out of the marble floor and a zoo of animals in her wake. Ethan had just repaired the compound from her last visit. A new visit would not be welcome.

  “I have to go stand next to Ethan and pretend I’m listening to all the Vamps kissing his ass. They’re all vying for an invite to the wedding that they think is ridiculous,” she said.

  Vampyres mated. They didn’t marry. Marriage was a vow that could be broken, while mating was not. Most Vampyres ridiculed the human tradition of marriage, but not my cousin. She played it off well, but I knew the derision hurt her.

  “Astrid,” I said as I took her hand in mine.

  “Yes, Heathcliff?” she asked with an eye roll.

  “I don’t think it’s stupid—at all.”

  She stopped and looked at the floor for a moment, then glanced up gratefully. “I don’t think it’s stupid either,” she whispered. “I want to marry Ethan more than I’ve ever wanted anything.”

  “More than Prada?” I teased.

  She barely missed a beat. “Yep, more than Prada. You gonna be okay on your own, my devastatingly handsome cousin?” she asked with a sly grin.

  “Aren’t I always?” I replied.

  “You know,” she said as she walked away and winked at me. “If you’d get your head out of your ass you wouldn’t have to be on your own…”

  Ignoring her, I made my way into the crowd. Astrid was insane. I was happy alone. Being mated would keep me from…all sorts of things I needed to do. God damn it, I was going to avoid my cousin for a while.

  I was greeted respectfully by many and checked my watch repeatedly. How long did I have to stay? A brief appearance should be sufficient. As Prince Ethan’s second in command of the North American Dominion I was expected to attend all formal functions. I grabbed a blood laced scotch from the bar and leaned on a column. I would stay until I finished my drink and then I was out.

  “Heathcliff, darling,” an exquisite Vampyre named Christina purred as she placed a perfectly manicured hand possessively on my chest. “I called you twice and haven’t heard back. Are you avoiding me?”

  She was stunning, but for some reason she left me cold this evening. We had dallied on and off for years. She was safe—wanted nothing but sex. However, sex with her was not what I craved at the moment.

  “Christina, lovely to see you,” I said as I removed her hand and stepped back. “I’ve been quite busy, but I assure you I haven’t been avoiding you.”

  Her eyes narrowed slightly, but she covered it quickly with a seductive smile. “Well then, what say you we meet after the party?”

  “We’ll see,” I said distractedly as I felt an unwanted presence close by. What was Raquel doing here? She never came to parties at the Cressida House. She was above the American need to socialize at the drop of a hat. Apparently she was slumming it tonight. My blue eyes turned green with desire and Christina very mistakenly assumed it was for her.

  “I’ll meet you at my place after the gathering,” she whispered excitedly as she placed a kiss on my lips.

  “Not tonight,” I said tersely. “I’m busy.”

  Her eyebrows rose in surprise and she stiffened. “Your loss.”

  “I’m afraid it is,” I said as politely as I could muster. I moved away from her. She was becoming a bit too clingy which I didn’t want or need. I had my own problems.

  Where the Hell was Raquel? I could feel her and I was certain she could feel me. We were in a public setting and I was somewhat sure I was safe from flying objects—or so I hoped. She was a fucking flame and I was a moth. My thoughts were wild and I wanted to kill my cousin for putting them there.

  “Hi Heathcliff,” a small voice announced from my shoulder. “Can me touch your butt?”

  On my shoulders sat four Baby Demons: Beyonce, Abe, Rachel and Ross. They stood about three inches high and caused more trouble than beings ten times their size. The miniature hellions belonged to Astrid and she let them have free reign of the compound. They were menaces with boob and ass fetishes.

  “No, Beyonce. You may not touch my butt,” I said as I plucked them off my shoulders and put them on the bar.

  “You no fun,” she said as she dove into a blood laced margarita.

  “You a pooper party,” Rachel informed me as she walloped her buddy Ross in the head. He went flying into Abe and the melee began.

  “It’s a party pooper,” I said as I pulled Beyonce out of the drink and separated the little nuisances. “If you can’t behave you have to go back upstairs.”

  “But you need me help,” Abe insisted as he took a covert swipe at Ross’ head.

  “And what exactly do I need your help with?” I asked as I quickly swigged down the rest of my scotch. Unfortunately it was incredibly difficult for Vampyres to tie one on. It would take at least ten strong scotches for me to feel even slightly inebriated. I was going to have to deal with the Baby Demons and Raquel as a sober man.

  “To help you get the girl,” he answered without a grammar issue and without suggesting I touch a butt.

  “What girl?” I asked as I signaled the bartender for another. This was turning out to be a long evening—and it wasn’t even the evening yet. The sun still shone through the skylights in the ballroom. They were muted with protective glass since many Vampyres couldn’t handle sun.

  “You know what girlllllllllllllll,” Rachel said slyly as she hopped over my shoulder, latched onto the back of my tux and slapped my ass. “The one you luuuuurrrrrrvvvvvvve.”

  “I love no girl,” I insisted as I retrieved her before she took a dive into my pants. “And if I did I am quite certain I could handle her on my own.”

  “Me no think so,” Abe said as he spastically slapped at his lips.

  The others joined his lip slapping antics and I watched in confusion. What the Hell were they doing?

  “Me think you need loooooootssssss of help,” Ross added.

  “But if you no like girl here we take you to Big Sean’s Booby Barn,” Abe told me as he continued to slap his mouth. “Lots of girls be there.”

  “Um, thank you, but no.” I said as I picked up my new scotch and took a healthy swig.

  “Me wanna go to Booby Barn,” Rachel squealed with bloodthirsty excitement. “Me hungry for bad Demons!”

  “Great idea,” I said quickly as I scooped the
m up and walked them to the foyer. I did not need or want their help. The farther away they were the better.

  “You suuuure you no wanna come?” Abe asked with a huge grin on his face.

  “Quite,” I replied.

  “You suuuuure you no want our help?” Beyonce added as she blew me wet kisses.

  “I really don’t think I need it.”

  “Me think you do, but it be your hot pink bloodbath,” she added gleefully.

  I was mute as I had no clue how to reply to that one. The Baby Demons were odd little creatures. However, it was time for them to go.

  “Don’t do anything we no do,” Abe screamed as they poofed away to the strip club. I grinned and shook my head. This day needed to end, but I had still had one more thing I needed to do…

  As I made my way back into the gathering I saw her and stopped in my tracks. Raquel was poured into a sexy black halter dress that made her pale skin and red hair exquisite. My gut tightened and every instinct I had was wildly inappropriate. She was surrounded by her entourage of Vampyres from her European Dominion. All men. All entirely too close to her. Especially the blond one who couldn’t take his eyes off her.

  The American Vamps were paying respects--literally falling over themselves to get close to her. Raquel was gracious and beautiful. She held the crowd in the palm of her hand. I observed jealously as she smiled and exchanged pleasantries with the besotted group of Vamps. I ground my fangs and fought my desire to barge in, take her in my arms and lay claim. She shouldn’t be here. She should be in Europe…Who in the Hell was running Europe while she was here? Only one way to find out.

  The band had started and the music was slow and sensual. The thought of holding her in my arms without being decapitated was appealing. It would be in bad taste for her to turn me down in front of an audience and worse for her to attack me. Win win.

  Her eyes narrowed dangerously as I approached and I hoped my tux jacket hid the growing bulge in my pants. The Vampyres stepped back out of respect for me and I grinned at the alluring blush on her cheeks.

  “May I have this dance?” I asked.