“That doesn’t make it easy.”
“No.” I look away because I don’t want to see pity in her eyes. This entire conversation makes me uncomfortable.
Veda speaks before I can think of something to say. “Demetria played for over an hour before settling down for her nap. I have no idea how long she’ll be asleep, but I think she’ll be in a better mood if we allow her to finish her nap.”
Recently, we’d been lucky if the rascal slept for more than thirty minutes at a time. Maybe this woman has some kind of a witch’s touch that we could take advantage of. With supervision, that is.
Veda sits on the porch and pats the space beside her. It’s too close, especially without my clothes on. But my feet apparently have a mind of their own as I move close to the spot where Veda wants me to sit. Holding myself stiffly beside her, I sit and try not to touch her. I feel like a juvenile worried about cooties. Nakedness is not uncommon with beastkind. Though, putting on clothes is the polite thing to do within the bear clan and we usually do it after shifting to our human forms.
We sit in silence for several long minutes. I don’t understand why her scent affects me like it does. I turn my nose away and look out into the shadows of the forest. I can see that it would be quite lonely to stay out here alone all the time. “Why do you choose to live out here away from everyone?” I finally ask as I turn to look at her.
“It’s how we’ve always lived.” She doesn’t explain further and she isn’t looking at me.
I can’t read what she’s thinking if I can’t see her eyes. “It makes no sense. Only a short time ago there was a beastkind war going on. You were in danger.”
Now her gaze meets mine. “I will die when the Goddess deems it my time. I hold no fear of the cats.”
Her answer irritates me. “You should. The cats don’t hold to any set of voodoo rules.”
Now her eyes spark with irritation. “What rules do you speak of? The ones where I’m ostracized from the bears because of my gifts. Kept away from children. Only visited in fear because curiosity gets the better of she-bears. They don’t befriend me and they never stay long. My mother told me of this, but when she was alive the loneliness was bearable. Some days I would give anything for the sound of another voice. The touch of another person. A gentle word.”
I’m stunned. I can’t remember how long ago her mother died. Many, many years. Our clan is close-knit. We need each other. Even when I was at my worst the clan didn’t abandon me. Without thinking, I reach for her hand.
An explosion of electrical current jumps between us the moment our skin touches. The shock jolts us both and we come to our feet.
It can’t be.
No!
Veda slowly backs away from me. “It’s impossible. It goes against the great texts.” She opens the front door of her cabin. “Take your granddaughter and go away now. Never return.” Fear shows in her eyes and I’m too stunned to do more than shake my head. Veda slowly removes her clothes without taking her eyes from me. She shifts and scrambles ungracefully over the side rail running into the forest. I take several steps intending to follow her. I hear Demetria cry from inside the cabin. What the hell do I do?
The Goddess has chosen my next mate.
Chapter Seven
Veda
No, No, No! This can’t be. It’s impossible. I cannot mate. It has never happened. Why would the Goddess do this? I run until I can no longer place one foot in front of the other. My legs quiver, my sides heave. Thinking I’ll never have a child is one thing. Mating a bear and making it reality is something else entirely. I thought I had given up all hope of motherhood but I lied to myself. To never hold the soft skin of a child against me again is more painful than I can bear. Now that I know the feeling, inhaled Demetria’s scent, it’s just that much more agonizing.
Each she-witch before me followed the same path. Time with our mother until it’s time for us to receive the gift. Years of loneliness until our time to produce a child comes upon us. Then we have our own child to make the isolation tolerable. It’s the cycle of a witch’s life. Why would I be the one to end it?
I curl into a ball, shift, and cry as only a human female can. I don’t want to be alone. I want a family. I want children. I can’t believe I’m thinking this. I want that big, horrible bear.
***
Hours later, I drag myself to my feet. Self-pity will get me nowhere. I must leave. The mating call will have Tyboll back here within a few days. Though I’ve never felt the pull until now, I’ve read about it and spoken to she-bears who suffered through it. The result is always the same. You are mated for life.
And I can never have a life mate. It’s not a witch’s destiny.
When I reach my cabin, I pour out the contents of a large backpack I use to hold herbs. I have very little in the way of clothes. Only castoffs from she-bears who need something from me. I try to tamp down my resentment. I have very little money too.
After I fill the bag, I know what else I need to do. I peel off my clothes and lay them on the bed. It probably won’t fool him, but I must try. Tears fall from my eyes as I light the cabin on fire to destroy the home Tyboll built for me. This is my only chance. I walk away with the flames spiking into the sky behind me. This part of my life is over. I’ve always wanted to be around others. Beastkind, not human. Beggars can’t be choosers.
I’m weary on the outside and terrified on the inside. The human world is one I’ve never seen. Yes, occasionally hunters break the rules and enter this sanctuary, but I’ve always known they were coming. Now I’m seeking out the people I’ve stayed away from all my life. It will take me days to get there and lose myself within the city. But I never will if I don’t take the first step. I refuse to look back. The smell of burning wood follows me for miles.
I sleep high in a tree when fatigue finally over takes me. It’s overcast and I can see only a few stars. No moon. I nod off for about an hour at a time. When the sun peeks over the horizon, I’m exhausted. It doesn’t matter. I crawl down from the tree, relieve myself, and eat a few dry berries from my pack. I drink my water and continue my journey. I’m entering a strange world and I’m afraid. Not of danger. With my beastkind blood I’m able to defend myself. It’s fear of the unknown. I’ve never been in this predicament. I always have warning of what’s ahead. My dreams give me a garbled sense of things to come.
What have I done to offend the Goddess so badly that she has forsaken me?
When darkness fills the sky again, I find another tree. I’ve come across fewer wild animals, so I know I’m getting closer to the human world. I sleep even less than the night before. I want nothing more than a bath and my bed. I want Tyboll. The longing inside of me is an electrically charged cable that needs grounding. The farther away from him I get the worse it is. I had hoped it would improve.
Does he feel the same imbalance?
Does he think I’m dead?
I’m so tired, I stumble and fall.
“Whoa there, are you okay?” a voice says from my right.
I’m dizzy and sick to my stomach from living off dried berries for two days, but my fear is greater. I scramble to my feet. “Get away or I will kill you.”
A man in strange clothing steps out of the trees. He places his hands palms out, slightly lifted. I see a gun on his hip and a shiny star on his chest. “Let me call an ambulance and get you some help. I’m just going to reach for my radio.” Slowly, his hand lowers and he pulls a black box from his hip. The thing makes a loud, crackling noise and I flinch.
This isn’t good. I need to get away and shift so I can travel faster. I take off running.
“Hey, I only want to help,” he calls from behind me.
I don’t care. I don’t need his help. I run for over a mile. Even in human form, I’m fast. He can’t keep up with me, but I know I need to put greater distance between us. I cross a road and clamber into dense trees on the other side. I stay hidden in foliage as I follow the road. I freeze when a driving machine sp
eeds past. My mother told me about these machines. She gave me as much information as she could about the human world so I would be prepared to seek out a man to breed with. She explained that it’s easy when you find the right human male. Again, it’s something I was supposed to understand when it happened.
Is my mother crying in the Summerlands because I have failed? Failed a great and majestic lineage. I am the first to do so and I will be the last because I will never bare a daughter. I keep walking. Branches jump out at me and I stumble. At least it feels as if they jump out. My eyes are bleary and now I just want sleep. I finally see lights in the distance. I stay back and wait until I’m sure no one is near. Rest Stop, the sign reads. There is a building with a woman in a dress painted on one door and a man painted on the other. I enter the room marked for women and find a bathroom. It stinks. There are two toilets and a sink. I use the toilet and then remove a soft shirt from my bag and wet it with cold water. I begin washing my face, neck, arms, and hands. It feels wonderful.
I check outside and it remains quiet. I quickly change into clean clothes. My hair is wild with my braid unraveling. I slowly unplait it, brush the unruly strands, and re-braid. When I’m finished, I feel much better now. Calmer.
I walk outside and immediately hear the sound of another vehicle. I run to the trees at the edge of the road and wait. A large truck pulls up and a man gets out. He spits on the walkway on the way to the men’s bathroom and goes inside. I run to the back of the truck and push up on the heavy, rolling door. It lifts and I scramble inside. It’s dark, but it doesn’t smell unpleasant like I expected. There are several large containers tied down by cord. I crawl behind one wondering if the driver will open the door and check on his cargo.
A few minutes later, he opens and closes the door where he drives. The engine rumbles and I fall slightly backward when he pulls forward. The floor is too close to my exhausted body and I give into temptation and lie down completely. It’s uncomfortable, but I’m too tired to care.
The steady rumble of the truck’s engine makes me sleepier. The memory of Tyboll’s hairy face is the last thing I think about before I pass out.
Chapter Eight
Tyboll
Stunned isn’t the correct word. I’m dumbfounded. Veda is my mate. Everything inside of me buzzes with the knowledge. It doesn’t matter that she ran. We both felt the shock when the unbelievable happened. If it wasn’t for little Deme, I’d have run in the opposite direction from Veda. Not that it would do any good. We are chosen mates and only one of our deaths can break the bond. Mandy was right. This is not how I felt with Patreous’s mother. She was not my true mate. The blood pounding through my veins right now never happened with her. I desired her with the blinding need of youth, but it was only lust.
Veda is my mate.
The more I process this, the more I accept it. Demetria squirms and I pull her tighter against me. “No, we are almost home and you are not getting down.” Her wolf form dissolves and I hold a bear cub. I can do nothing but laugh. She uses the form that gives her the best advantage. She’s a sneaky child just like her mother.
I carry her up the stairs of Mandy’s porch.
“Harder, Honey, don’t stop,” Mandy yells from inside.
I’m sure the entire clan can hear them. This is normal and always worse after they argue, which is every other day. I chuckle softly. The clan will need to adjust to the sounds Veda makes when I take her as mate. I’ll have her screaming louder than Mandy ever has.
I pound my fist on the door. “Hurry it up in there. Your hellion child needs her parents and I have things to do.” I need to clean my entire cabin. I can’t move Veda in in its current state of filth. Mandy complains all the time, but Patreous and I don’t care. We actually like it. Our bear cave wasn’t made for women. Until now.
Honey opens the door a few minutes after Mandy gives a loud wail. The two of them have no shame. “I see you’re feeling better,” I say as I thrust Deme into his arms.
“Mandy is shifting for the birth in the morning and we want to celebrate.” Honey’s guilty smile says everything. Mandy wins again. Not that I had any doubt about the outcome. Will Veda wrap me around her finger the same way Mandy does Honey? Hell no. I’m not a milksop.
“You smell funny,” Honey says as he steps closer and sniffs the air.
“I said the same thing yesterday,” Mandy responds as she leans over his shoulder. Her eyes grow large. “Oh no.”
“Oh yes,” I say back. “I’m mated. And I have things to do, so my babysitting duty is over for the day.”
“Father,” Patreous shouts from across the clearing as he runs toward us. “Look,” he says as he points into the sky.
A trail of smoke rises into the air. It’s far away. It’s my mate’s cabin. Without waiting for anyone, I take off running and shift at the same time. “No!” I yell.
I say it again. “No,” but this time softer. She will be okay. I will get rid of the stove and fireplace in my cabin. The stupid woman will do all the cooking outside. I refuse to acknowledge the terror eating at my soul. She is okay. I would feel it if something happened to her. And the Goddess cannot be so cruel.
The cabin is completely engulfed in flames by the time I arrive. The heat keeps me back. Dmitri appears beside me without warning, as only a vampire can. I don’t remember calling him. I also have no idea how I ended up on my knees with my hands gouged into the dirt.
Dmitri touches my shoulder. “There is no one alive inside,” he says softly.
I know this, but I can’t handle the vampire saying it. “No,” I cry out.
“That doesn’t mean she’s in there.” He knows about the mating. I must have cast my thoughts to him as I ran. A liege vampire always knows what happens within his clan. The gift of their bite keeps us alive. We are only as strong as our vampire and Dmitri is one of the strongest of his kind.
“Stay back and I will check.” He blinks from my sight and I know he’s gone into the fire. He can feel pain. But then again there is no greater suffering than mine at this moment. He blinks back holding the shirt Veda wore earlier. My heart stops.
“This was on the bed. She’s not inside. What did you say to scare her away?”
I’m so completely lost in heartbreak that it takes a moment for his words to sink in. She’s alive. “Me?” I don’t speak aloud, but Dmitri hears my thoughts.
“Yes, you. She lives here in peace. You saw her once yesterday and once today. She burns down her cabin and runs away. I have no doubt that it’s you.”
My fury ignites. If that wily witch was in front of me right now, I’d have her bent over a tree stump while I beat her ass.
“If that’s what you told her, no wonder she ran.”
My growl fills the woods.
Mandy and Honey run through the trees saving me from committing suicide by vampire. “Was she inside?” Mandy asks as she cautiously looks between me and Dmitri.
It must be obvious that I’m barely in control of my temper. “No, but I will burn her ass with my hand when I find her.”
“She’s your mate?” Mandy asks with the same shocked look I know I had earlier.
“Curse the Goddess, but she is.”
“This is wonderful.” She throws her arms around me.
With calm deliberation, I peel her fingers from my skin. “Go home with Honey. I will find her and bring her back. By the time we return, we will be a mated pair and this silliness will end.”
Mandy shakes her head. “Umm, Tyboll, that may not be the best idea. You need to give her time to adjust.”
I look at Mandy, unable to keep my rage in check. I’m all but roaring when I speak. “There will be no soft mating ritual with that damned witch. She burned all her chances away.” I point one long finger at Mandy. “Stay out of my life and I will stay out of yours. I’m going to claim my mate whether she wants me or not.”
The crazy she-wolf bats away my finger. “Sheesh, you grumpy old bear.”
I give Honey
a look that says, “If you don’t control her, I will.” Honey growls and I decide not to have the bear brawl I really need at this moment. I have a she-bear witch to find and drag back by her mangy red hair.
***
It’s three days before I return without my mate. I’ve gone between anger, worry, hatred, and experiencing pain so deep it will never go away. Rejection. It’s not the first time. Patreous’s mother left me after his birth. She mated with a human to have him and then left, rejecting us both.
The damned she-bear witch can run as far as she wants. I will not chase her anymore.
Chapter Nine
Veda
Every muscle that rests against the vehicle’s floor aches when I wake up. And I’m starving. The truck slows down, turns, and comes to a stop. The rumbling from the engine immediately shuts off. I scramble to grab my pack when the door rolls upward.
The unexpected voice startles me. “I know you’re in there. Come on out and I’ll feed you. There’s an inspection station a few miles from here and you need to ride up front.”
My eyes adjust to the light coming through the doors and I lower my arm. The man I’m staring at reminds me of Tyboll. Scruffy hair covers his face, though he’s much older than Tyboll. Well, not older. Tyboll has lived for centuries and only looks like he’s in his thirties. The man smiles and I relax a bit. He has a nice smile.
“I’m sorry.”
He shakes his head. “Don’t be. It’s not the first time and it won’t be the last. I’ll buy you a meal and give you a lift to the city.”
I know I’m still too close to bear territory, but I’ll have a chance if I can lose myself in the city. “Thank you.”
He places his hand out and I tentatively take it. His soft smile remains in place. “You’re a young thing. Is there someone I can call to pick you up?”
No one’s ever said I look young. “No thank you.”
Romancing the Paranormal Page 95
