“Have you had more swelling than normal?”
“Yes,” Finn tells him. “After work it’s especially bad.”
Dr. Newman sighs, grabs my chart, and scribbles down some notes.
“Here’s what I’m seeing. In the second trimester your blood pressure should be at the lowest point in the pregnancy. Yours is high. Too high for my liking. This may be a fluke, but my gut’s telling me this is the norm for you. Most women’s pressure will decrease when they are lying down, but yours was the same regardless of your position. I’m giving you a blood pressure machine to take home with you today. I want you taking readings four times a day and writing them down so that you can call them in at the end of the week. If the readings are still in the range of what I see today, you’ll need to be put on some medication and we’ll have to discuss you not working for the rest of the pregnancy. Gestational hypertension has the potential to lead to preeclampsia, which is something we need to avoid at all costs. We need to keep these babies cooking in there as long as we can.”
Finn jumps in, ready to take this on full force. “What kind of readings should she be looking for? How high is too high?”
“I don’t like anything over 140/90. If you see anything hovering around there, wait a few hours and take it again, seeing if it decreases. If you get several readings that are consistently around 160/110, like I got today, don’t wait a week before calling me. If it’s that high, we need to start medication and get it lowered.”
I’m starting to get a little freaked out. I’m well aware of high blood pressure, the damage it can do to organs, and all other shitty side effects of it. I lived in a house with two kidney disease patients my whole life. This is different, though. Not only can this affect me, but it can hurt my babies, too.
“Maggie, it’s all going to be fine,” Dr. Newman tells me. He must notice the panic setting in. “My job is high risk pregnancies. This is just a bump in the road. There is potential for this to turn into more, but we can manage this and prevent complications. We just need to make sure you take care of yourself and do exactly what I tell you is best for you and your babies.”
I nod, not really knowing what to say.
“My nurse will be back in with your machine and teach you how to use it. I’ll be waiting for your call,” he says, patting my knee and walking out of the room.
“We got this, Magpie,” Finn whispers against my temple. “We’ll keep you home, barefoot and pregnant. The babies will be just fine.”
Chapter Eighteen
I wake up, panting, sweating, and horny as hell. My blood pressure might be bad but my hormones are obviously in good working order. These dreams I’ve been having about Finn are so damn realistic. As soon as we’re about to seal the deal, I always wake up.
Fuck this. I’m done with Finn’s self-imposed no sex rule. I trust him. I think I trust Finn more than anyone else in my life, which is saying a lot.
I think I’m falling madly in love with Finnian Thomas O’Leary.
I think I need to have sex with him right this minute or I will die.
When we got home from my appointment earlier, I just wanted to get into bed and sleep. He was more than happy to accommodate my request. He’s feeling quite generous these days. Hopefully his generosity will continue and he’ll give me what I want.
I roll over, which isn’t an easy task, and take a minute to look at him in the bed next to me. He’s sound asleep, sprawled out on his back, one hand resting on his chest, the other thrown over his head. The covers are kicked off of him, thanks to my hot flashes. I make quick work of stripping off my clothes and get back on the bed.
I don’t know where to start. I don’t know if I want to put my hands on him, my mouth on him, or a combination of the two.
Finn’s a heavy sleeper, so I manage to pull his boxers off without him so much as even moving. I scoot my body back up the bed, settle in between his legs, and pull his cock into my mouth. It only takes a few seconds before I feel him hardening. My hand that’s resting on his stomach can feel his muscles grow tight. I use my other hand to help my mouth work him into a frenzy. His hands grab my hair, moving my head at just the pace he likes.
“Christ, woman, what are you doing?” His voice comes out deep and strained, still laced with sleep.
I laugh around him, which earns me a delicious moan. He yanks my head up.
“Come here.” He grabs me under my arms and pulls me up to him, putting us both on our sides. He kisses me like his life depends on it. We’ve been kissing a lot lately, but it’s always reserved, like he’s holding back. This kiss is like Finn has been unleashed. I have to pull back from it because I can’t breathe from the intensity. It’s too much for me to handle. He’s too much for me to handle. I think I could have an orgasm just from that one kiss.
“I need you, Irish. Don’t make me wait any longer. I’m begging you.”
“Do you trust me, Magpie? That was our deal.”
His eyes are on fire. He wants this just as much as I do.
“Absofuckinglutely. Please, Finn, right now.”
He hesitates, so I tug on the hair that I’ve still got in my grip from that delicious kiss.
“Finn, I swear, if you don’t hurry and-”
“Hush for one second. I’m trying to work out the, umm, mechanics of this. Give me a minute. I know I saw this on one of my apps.”
I start cracking up laughing, the mood squashed. “Are you really relying on an app to tell us how to have sex?” I stare at him for a beat or two, noticing the crease in between his dark eyebrows. He’s serious. “You’re a total mood killer. I don’t even want to do it anymore.” I move to get up from the bed and put my clothes back on.
He ignores my comment. “Oh yeah, Policeman. Get up and face the wall.”
“What?”
“That’s how we’re supposed to fuck. Get against the wall and spread ‘em. You know, like I’m a cop and I’m about to frisk you. That’s a position that won’t hurt the babies. It’s called Policeman.”
He scoots off the bed, grabs my shirt out of my hands, and pulls me towards the wall next to my closet. I’m laughing so hard at his seriousness over the situation. I can’t believe we are actually having this conversation.
“I told you, I’m not in the mood anymore, especially now that I have a picture of us playing cops and robbers burned into my brain. I’m done. Let’s go eat some Chinese food.”
“You started this,” he says, pointing down at his still hard cock. “I have every intention of finishing. So, Policeman is out.” He shrugs, getting lost in thought again. “Hmm, what about Leap Frog?”
I just shake my head and laugh.
“Stand and Deliver?”
The laughter gets stronger. He’s totally serious. I’m not planning out our sexual positions. I’m surprised he’s not drawing out the different options in his sketch pad that’s thrown across my dresser.
Choreographed sex.
This is a new one for me.
“Couch Potato? Lap Top? Counter Intuitive? We could do that one, and you could still have your Chinese food after.”
I collapse back onto the bed in a heap, I’m laughing so hard. He’s not amused, but the babies are. They obviously enjoy my laughter at their dumb father. They start moving all over the place. I gasp, and Finn drops to his knees and is at my side in an instant.
“What is it?” he asks.
“Put your hand right here, see if you can feel them.” The babies stop moving. “Quick, keep yelling out ridiculous sex positions so I can laugh at you.”
I start laughing again when I see the look on his face and the babies start moving. I grab his hand and push it down on my bump. I am rewarded with a huge kick, from who I assume is Baby A. Finn’s eyes get huge and he gasps.
“Make it do that again,” he breathes out.
“I can’t. You felt that?” I ask, so happy for him.
“I did. That’s unreal. I think that was the wild one we saw today rolling all
over.”
“I think so, too.”
“Well, our child just effectively cock-blocked me for the first time. I can’t have sex with you after that,” he says. “That would just be weird. Come on, let’s go eat some cold Chinese food.”
Finn and I sit on my battered couch, enjoying our cold leftovers and the company of each other when the doorbell rings. I assume it’s Troy or Landon, so I just yell from the couch for them to come in. We continue eating, and I tell them to fix some food when I hear the door open.
“If you cooked, I think I’ll pass,” says a voice I haven’t heard in a while.
It can’t be him.
I turn around to see if my ears are playing tricks on me. My God, it’s really him. Miller Ashby is standing by the door.
“Ahhhhhhhhh,” I scream, leaping off the couch and launching myself into his arms.
“God, Mags, look at you. You’re about to pop.”
I can feel Finn at my back. I realize he’s got no idea who this is. He’s probably a little unnerved at the fact that I am wrapped around this man.
I pull away from Miller and push myself into Finn’s side, wrapping my arm around his waist.
“Finn, this is Miller, my friend that I was telling you about. The one whose room you’re currently residing in. Miller, this is Finn, my baby daddy.”
Miller shakes his head and laughs at my choice of phrase, simultaneously shaking Finn’s hand.
“Miller,” Finn says and nods. “Based on what I’ve heard from some of her other friends, you can disregard any of the shit she’s told you about me. Bennett’s filled me in and it seems Magpie likes to exaggerate about some of the particulars of our early relationship. I’m really not as bad as she makes me out to be.”
“Well, according to Claire, you’re a step down from a saint. She went on and on about you.” He looks back to me. “I went over there first, but she said you were still living here. Last I heard, you were moving home.”
“Finn’s a bully. He’s forcing me to live in sin.”
“I didn’t hear any complaints an hour ago when you had my di-”
“My God, you two are perfect for each other,” Miller says, interrupting Finn’s train of thought. “I don’t need to hear the rest of that sentence, man. Mags is like my little sister.”
Finn kisses me and pats my belly. “I’m gonna go grab a shower and let the two of you catch up.”
Miller and I make our way to the couch. As soon as he hears the water moving through the pipes he starts questioning me.
“Spill it, Maggie. What the hell is going on? When I left town you were plotting his murder. Now you’re living together and your mom’s rantin’ and ravin’ about how awesome he is. He’s even got Ava in the Finn Fan Club.”
“He’s a totally different person. It’s like when I told him I was pregnant he did a complete one-eighty and got his shit together. He wants to make sure I’m good, that the babies are good. He’s not partying anymore, he’s working two jobs, and he’s trying to buy his own business. I’ve never been this happy, Miller. It’s like I’m living someone else’s life. It doesn’t seem real.”
“Whoa, back up. Did you say ‘babies’?” he asks, his eyes wide.
I nod. “We’re having twins. Crazy, right? I told you, it doesn’t seem real.”
I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face, even if I wanted to.
He takes my hand and squeezes it. “I’m glad you’re happy, Mags. It’s good to see you like this. You weren’t so happy when I left.”
His face gets serious, and I know his thoughts have drifted to my sister. How could they not? He’s sitting in the apartment we all shared. How many hours did they sit on this very couch, cuddled up watching those stupid auction shows he loved?
“How is she?” he whispers, like he’s scared to say it too loud. I don’t even think he can bear to say her name.
“She’s good. Happy.” I don’t want to say too much. He looks and sounds like he’s in physical pain. My heart is breaking for my friend. Just the thought of being in his shoes, the idea of having to sit and ask someone how Finn is because he’s in love with someone else and living with them makes my chest feel like it’s going to explode.
“Is she still doing alright from her surgery? Any complications?”
I shake my head. “She’s even started running again.”
His eyes get glassy, the edges rimmed in red. “That’s got to make her feel good. She wanted that so bad.” A small smile plays on his face. “God, she would get so mad at me when I’d go for a run and she couldn’t.”
I nod. My hand is still in his, so I give him a reassuring squeeze. I want him to know that he will be alright. I don’t know how, but I hope he will find someone to help him get over the loss of my sister. He’s miserable. He’s lost weight. I can tell he’s been drinking a lot. His skin has that same sallowness it did as when he went through his binge when Goose and Bennett started dating. I can smell smoke on him, so he’s obviously started up that nasty little habit, too.
“Are you gonna go see her while you’re here?”
I don’t know why I ask. I think the answer is pretty obvious.
“I can’t,” he says, wiping at the corners of his eyes.
He looks up to the ceiling, clears his throat, then looks back to me. He’s back in control of himself. This must be a familiar routine. He’s pretty good at reining it in.
“I just wanted to come check on you and pick up some stuff I left at my parents’ house when I left town.”
“Are you settling down somewhere?”
“I don’t know for how long. I just need to stay in one place for a while. It’s in the middle of nowhere, it’s quiet, and I can work. Mindless, thoughtless work with some good people. It’s what I need right now. I don’t know if I can ever come back here. I sure as hell can’t do it any time soon. Too many ghosts.”
“What about school, Miller? Don’t throw all your hard work away. You were so close.”
“Listen to you, already mothering.” He smiles at me, and I just want to cry for my friend. “I’m not stopping forever, but my head’s not in a good place right now. I need to just figure some things out.” He gets quiet again. “I don’t know who I am without her.”
“I get it. Please don’t be a stranger. Call me so I can know you’re alive. Come visit when you can. These babies will be here soon and they need to know their Uncle Miller.”
He gives my belly a rub. “I’ll work on it. It’s just so damn hard to be here. Eventually it might not be. It’s got to stop hurting soon, right?”
I don’t answer him, just walk with him to the door. I’m scared the answer is no, it will never stop hurting. Before I met Finn, I would have told him to stop being such a pussy and get over it. But now, I don’t know if that’s possible. I hope I’m wrong.
I hug Miller tight. I miss him so much.
“Miller, please take care of yourself. I love you.”
Now I’m the one that’s crying.
“I will. And you let me know when those babies get here. I can’t promise that I’ll come, but it doesn’t mean that I don’t care. Love you, Mags.”
I stand in the doorway, watching him pull out of the parking lot, crying for my friend, when I feel Finn’s strong arms wrap around me.
“You OK?” he asks.
I shake my head no.
He leads me to the couch and sits me down. He kneels between my legs, sitting back on his heels.
“Is he OK?”
Another shake of my head.
“He’s completely heartbroken. My sister crushed him. He can’t even stand to be here because it hurts so bad. He loves her so much. It’s a love that just consumes him. It’s been like that his whole life. She loves him, too, but her love for Bennett is so much more. Miller didn’t stand a chance against Bennett.” I stop and dry my face. “It hurts me to even imagine what he’s going through.”
“Don’t even try to imagine it, Magpie.”
Finn gets up on his knees so he can grab my face. He runs his thumbs back and forth over my cheeks, catching a few stray tears that escaped.
His eyes hold mine steady when he whispers his next words. “You will never have to experience heartache like that. I will make sure that your beautiful heart stays full and happy and whole.”
My full, happy, whole heart just missed a few beats.
Chapter Nineteen
“A minivan?”
I move the piece of toast away from my mouth and drop it to my plate. Obviously my caffeine hasn’t kicked in, because I swear I think Finn just suggested I trade my car in for a minivan.
“Yeah, a minivan. You need a nice, respectable family car now. You can’t tote two kids and all their gear around in that little Audi of yours. I bet a stroller can’t even fit in the back.”
“Well you’re not getting me into a minivan. I’m still in college, for Christ’s sake. That’s just absurd.”
Finn puts down his cup of coffee and walks over to my stool at the island. My body clenches in anticipation. He spreads my knees apart to get as close as he can to me.
“Magpie, you’re a total MILF. What you drive is inconsequential. Hot moms can drive minivans. They can drive anything. We’ll trade in your car and get one.”
The fact that he’s mere inches from my mouth and laying that accent on thick isn’t making me budge on this. He can try all his dirty little tricks. It’s not happening.
“I’m not getting rid of that car. It was a gift from my Daddy.”
I smile, remembering the uproar in the Brennan household when he came home with that car. Lucy was livid. She had that clunky old Jeep he restored for her, but I refused to drive it around. After she had surgery her junior year to remove one of her kidneys she couldn’t handle driving it and Momma wanted to give it to me. As if. Daddy came home with a beautiful red Audi A5 for me, and Momma and Lucy both hit the ceiling. Daddy shut it down quickly, explaining that with the amount they’d spent on Goose in gymnastics through the years, he could have bought about five of them and it still wouldn’t have been even.
More of You: The Home Series, Book Two Page 13
