***
“We have you sedated,” the doctor said. “In all actuality, I’m flabbergasted that you’re awake at all. The quantities of drugs we’re pumping into your system is enough to put a horse to sleep.”
I didn’t say anything.
Well, only because I couldn’t.
Because if I had been able to say something, it’d be me yelling at this stupid fool for doing this in the first place.
Why was I being sedated?
“I can see you have questions.”
I let my eyes roll over to the woman that’d been the one to get the doctor. The brunette with her soft green eyes, and her freckled cheeks.
“You were in a motorcycle accident,” she whispered. “They had to do surgery on your brain, and to keep you from doing anything that would hurt yourself, they essentially relaxed your body so that you could heal.”
I blinked twice. No.
Why I could blink and not move the rest of my body, I didn’t know, but I was thankful for the small miracle.
She frowned, then understanding dawned.
“Your DNR?”
I blinked once.
“They didn’t know you had a DNR at first, and since they didn’t have it on hand once they did know, they wouldn’t stop providing you those life saving measures until they did. Your mom took nearly two weeks to get here with it.”
Irrational anger surged through me.
My mother had one job, and one job only. That was to offer the DNR when or if it was ever needed.
Fucking A.
“The moment that the sedative and pain medication wears off, you will no longer be comfortable because you won’t be able to stop yourself from moving. Your head will hurt, and you’ll need to be very careful about any movements until you know how it will affect you.”
I glared at the doctor.
“Dr. Dickerson?” Henley murmured. “Can you give him some more morphine or something to counteract the pain?”
Dr. Dickerson shook his head.
“Honestly, I want to know what he’s feeling before I give him anything,” he explained. “We’ll go from there.”
The nurse was doing something at the IV pump. Her eyes were on the instrument, and her fingers were flying over the buttons.
None of the words made sense, and I had a panicked thought that maybe it was more of what was making me feel paralyzed that she was putting in the machine.
However, when I felt the warm, reassuring hand on mine, despite not being able to squeeze hers back, I felt relieved.
My panic at being hooked up to any kind of machine lowered to manageable levels, and I took one long, deep breath.
Everything would be okay.
I would be able to check out as soon as I could feel my toes.
I would be okay.
I would be okay.
I would be okay.
“When this does wear off, I want you to let me know.”
Yeah, right.
“We will,” Henley replied, sounding sure of herself.
Wrong, Hen. So very, very wrong.
Then, just like that, I was left alone again with my fierce little kitty that was protecting me from not only the nurse but also the doctor.
Her eyes turned up to mine, and she smiled.
“You have a lot of people that are going to freak out when they hear that you’re awake,” she said. “In fact, your sister might break down and come down here when she hears.”
I blinked twice.
“No?”
I blinked twice again, indicating no.
“Why not?”
I just looked at her, and she blushed.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “Sometimes I’m stupid.”
I blinked twice.
She smiled and looked away.
“Your team’s lost ten games without you,” she changed the subject. “Do you want to watch the game?”
No, that was the last thing I wanted to do. Seeing them playing the game without me would fucking hurt, so I blinked twice.
She blinked back.
“No?”
I blinked twice again.
“Okay.” She looked down at where her hand was on mine, and quickly took it away.
I felt the loss like a swift kick to the chest.
I wanted her hand back more than I wanted to move my fuckin’ hand.
I blinked twice.
She frowned and tilted her head.
I looked down at my hand, her hand, and then blinked once.
“You want me to hold your hand again?”
I blinked once.
She bit her lip, but she chose to place her hand back on mine and squeeze it.
Why I could feel her hand, as well as her heat, but couldn’t move my freakin’ hand, confounded me. I had so many questions to ask, and none of them came.
“They said it could take up to a couple of hours for you to start regaining some feeling,” she said. “Would you like to watch a movie on my phone with me?”
I blinked once.
She nodded her head and pulled out her phone, hit some buttons, and bit her lip in concentration.
“I hope you don’t mind if I watch it with subtitles,” she said. “It’s easier for me to concentrate and understand what’s going on.”
I understood that completely.
My sister was deaf like her, after all.
I blinked twice.
No, I didn’t mind. Not the least tiny bit.
In fact, having the subtitles on would be helpful in a lot of ways.
“I’ll try to find one you like,” she said. “I have a shit ton on here for my niece…but there is Deadpool, Star Trek, and GI Jane.”
Any of those would be fine, but she waited for me to choose—and to do that, she asked for each one individually. When I realized she was going to force me to choose, I blinked once at Deadpool.
Anything was better than nothing at this point, and maybe by watching a movie, it’d make me focus on it instead of not being able to move my limbs…and being in my worst nightmare.
But then she pulled a pillow from somewhere behind her, placed it on my lap, and placed the phone against the pillow. She took the seat beside the bed, scooted it as close to the bed as the bed would allow, and sat in it. After she was situated, she leaned over, pulled her legs up into the chair, and reached forward to press play.
Once the movie started, she leaned her head against the bed, only inches away from my head, and took up my hand again.
The minute she did, my heart rate decelerated, my breathing evened out, and I fell into a trance.
I watched the movie.
I wanted to laugh.
I wanted to pull her closer.
I realized that I was a really bad patient.
Most of all, though, I wished I could freeze time, because I’d never felt more right in my life, and that was kind of terrifying.
***
It was at the end of Deadpool, two hours and a minute into it, when I felt the twitch of my nose.
I looked down, focused my brain, and moved my nose again.
I wanted to yell. To scream in excitement. I wanted to do anything really, but mostly, I wanted to shake the sleeping woman next to me. The woman who still had her hand in mine. The woman who I could smell now that I’d focused myself. The woman’s hair that I could feel brushing over my skin.
***
I watched the clock, counting the times the minute hand rolled past twelve for the second time and felt my fingers twitch.
I closed my eyes and sent all my concentration into moving my finger, and felt it lift off the bed, then fall immediately back down.
That made my finger, one of my toes on my left foot, all of them on my right side, and nearly my entire face.
The ones on my face hurt, though, so I stopped trying to move those and concentrated on getting something else to move.
; It’d been four hours since they’d stopped the tranquilizing medication. An hour since the nurse had come in to check on me. Thirty minutes since the doctor had come in.
However, I pretended I was asleep, much like the woman on the side of my bed, and they left soon enough.
Once they were gone, I went back to what I was doing and realized rather quickly how frustrating it was for a body to come alive, one single body part at a time.
I lifted the finger again, and this time managed to get something soft and silky underneath of it when I brought it back down.
The woman’s hair.
Henley’s.
Another tiny piece of my soul lightened.
I was a dark, dangerous, broken man.
Being in this hospital was slowly killing me.
But knowing that this woman was still here, even though I didn’t know her at all, was making this become actually bearable.
I could do this.
And when, thirty minutes later, I closed my entire fist around her hair and held onto it, I felt another piece of my soul settle.
***
Four hours later
I knew the moment she woke.
Her body, which had been soft and yielding, tensed.
She was no longer leaning just her head on the bed. Now she was leaned forward, her head on my lap. Her arms were tucked underneath her, making her entire upper body lean heavily against mine.
Since I was wary of moving thanks to the killer headache I now possessed, I hadn’t jarred her in the least. Mostly scared to feel the pain shock through me, but also, admittedly, unwilling to wake her.
So, I let her sleep, and the moment she started to stir and sat her head up, my body immediately missed the heavy, comforting heat of her.
Her face had little dot indentions from the knit blanket that was covering my lower body, and creases formed on her cheek and over the lower half of her neck.
Her eyes were heavy with sleep, but I could see that she knew exactly what was going on, and where she was, the minute her eyes met mine.
I spoke without moving anything but my lips and tongue, and even then, it was barely over a whisper.
“When I was sixteen, I watched my father die a slow death. My mother wouldn’t pull the plug because she was dragging it out, refusing to allow him peace. He’d cheated on her, and she was getting her revenge. She didn’t want him to die in the hospital, but at home where she could draw what little life he had left out.” I took a deep breath and immediately regretted it. “My grandmother wouldn’t allow him to go with her because my mother’s a fuckin’ freak, so instead of doing the humane thing and letting him die with dignity, she held him there in limbo for over two weeks while his body slowly shut down. He was in so much pain and was trying to hide it. It was the worst feeling in the world.”
She stayed silent.
I didn’t explain why he was in the hospital. Telling her that would put her in danger. However, I could explain why I was about to do what I was about to do.
I could move. Everything.
It was going to hurt. Badly.
But I was going to do it anyway.
I couldn’t be here another moment.
And she was coming with me.
I wouldn’t force her, but I was going to convince her to do it, and she was going to go with it because I could tell she wouldn’t let me suffer due to my own stupidity all by myself.
“When he was finally dead, he was bleeding out of his ears, eyes, and mouth. He was breathing so erratically that we couldn’t tell if his breath was his last between one and the next,” I continued, then sat up, swinging my legs over the side of the bed. “He stopped breathing and restarted seventeen different times.”
She gasped and stood, her hands going out to meet me. “And I can’t be here, because the last time I was in a hospital, my father’s nurse killed him. I can’t be here. I can’t.”
Then I stood up, and my entire world spun.
Before I could hit my knees on the ground, though, a strong, skinny arm was there to catch me.
“No, no, no.”
“Yes.” I took a step forward. “Yes.” Another step. “Yes.”
Chapter 10
If you’re going to get into trouble for hitting someone, you might as well hit them hard!
Rhys
“I can’t believe you walked out of the hospital!” my sister cried out. “How stupid can you be?”
I looked over at the woman who was driving me away from the hospital—of which I’d checked out AMA—against medical advice. She was mad, very mad. She also, I could tell, agreed with my sister.
“Renata,” I sighed. “I’m not doing this right now.”
She started to tear into me again, but I stopped her by saying, “And why aren’t you at the hospital right now?”
She shut up instantly.
“Exactly,” I said. “We’re both traumatized. How about you just thank your lucky stars that I’m alive and able to speak to you right now.”
I heard her sniffle, and immediately I felt terrible for saying anything at all.
“Ren,” I groaned. “I’m sorry.”
The first sob hitched her voice, and I closed my eyes as the pain from my sister’s tears washed over me.
“I thought you were d-dead,” she cried. “I’ve been crying for two weeks straight. I think I’m actually thankful that Mom wasn’t able to get there because she had to stop for stupid filming on the way.”
I winced.
Wouldn’t it be hilarious for everyone to know the only reason that I wasn’t dead two weeks ago was because my mother was a porn star and was still, at the age of fifty-four, making porn videos?
“That’s kind of disgusting to think she was doing that while I was in a coma,” I told her. “I had no clue that was what took her so long to get there with the DNR, though. I’m not sure what to say.”
That was when the woman at my side started to crack up.
I found myself smiling despite the fact that my mother was such a self-centered person.
“I gotta go.” I smiled and closed my eyes. “Oh, hey!” I blurted out before hanging up as a thought occurred to me.
“What?” She sniffled.
“You remember that favor I called you for in the middle of the night for a couple weeks back?” I asked.
“Yeah.” She sniffled again. “What about her?”
I grinned as I looked over at my new fake fiancée. “She’s the girl that’s been answering my phone while I’ve been in my…unconscious state.”
The sheer luck of her finding me where she volunteered…
She gasped. “You’re lying!”
I shook my head. “No, ma’am, I’m not.”
Renata squealed. “What did I tell you?”
I rolled my eyes.
Renata was a hopeless romantic. She felt that everyone had someone out there waiting just for them. Her husband and she had met much the same way, as if by fate.
They’d both been going to New York, and both of them had been kicked off their flights due to overbooking. They’d spent over eighteen hours in a tiny little airport in Texas as they waited for the next flight to arrive. During those eighteen hours, they’d fallen in love.
However, when the time came to leave for New York, they’d both went their separate ways. Only, two days later, they met each other again at the CI conference. Renata being the director, and the man being the person that was funding not only the conference but about eighteen scholarships for those with hearing disabilities. In fact, five years before, Renata had been a recipient of one of those scholarships.
And now I was showing my own signs of having my own fateful meeting with a woman. Twice.
Yeah, I was never going to hear the end of it.
“Love you, Ren-Ren.”
I didn’t usually use that nickname anymore and hadn’t since I was around eighteen.
However,
it wasn’t every day that a man woke from a coma that he wasn’t supposed to wake from.
Tomorrow, I’d be the hardass everyone knew me as.
Today, I’d be the man that I’d always wanted to be but couldn’t.
Thanks, Dad.
“Love you, too, Rhy Rhy.”
With that, she hung up, and the car was left with a thick silence.
“Fiancée?” I asked, barely containing the laughter.
She winced. “You heard that?”
I huffed out a small laugh. “Sure did. Actually, I remember quite a bit from when I was asleep.”
Her brows rose.
“How much?”
I grinned and rolled my head to look at her. “All of it.”
“All of it?” she squeaked.
I nodded again. “Yep, all of it.”
She bit her lip. “You’re kidding, right?”
I cleared my throat. “I know that you have a niece that’s young, and your sister lives with you. I know that your sister thinks you’re stupid for going to see a dead man every day. I know that you volunteer three times a week, but over the past two weeks you’ve spent more time on my floor, and in my room, than you probably should have. I also heard my teammates calling you my fiancée, and you not correcting them.”
She blushed profusely, but I was nowhere near finished.
“I heard that you don’t like your boss because he likes to ‘accidentally’ grab your ass when you have heavy boxes in your hands. I also think you should look into quitting your job if you hate it as much as you do,” I continued. “Oh, and since you visit hospitals so much, I agree that you need a therapy dog to come with you.”
Her mouth fell open as she took the final turn that led to our street and finally pulled into not her driveway, but mine.
That’s when I saw all the letters, candles, and balloons. “I find it quite unnerving that people are putting stuff on my doorstep.”
“Those are just your friends and teammates,” she explained softly. “The security guy you had with you that first night, the one that knocked me on my ass?” She waited for me to nod. “He’s done a pretty good job about keeping anybody else away from our street. You should see the stadium.”
I winced. “I’d rather not.”
Seeing the stadium would be like a shot straight to the heart, reminding me that I had a very long road ahead of me before I could get back to playing the game that saved my life what seemed like a lifetime ago.
Listen Pitch Page 4
