Just as I thought, the man was down on the floor in a moment. There was blood coming out of his mouth and a bruise forming around his eye. My massive fist had crushed the side of his face in one careful blow.
I backed off of him, not wanting to lose control and waited for him to pull himself back up. “Are you done?” I asked, moving my feet skillfully, more out of habit than necessity.
“Go to hell!” he answered before he jumped to his feet and leapt at me. I grabbed him and as I did, I felt him try to swing at me. I blocked him and shoved him back.
I beamed, knowing that I hadn’t even had to swing at him again in order to get him down on the mat.
I heard him hit hard and slide a little bit, but there was no more blood. I took this as a good thing.
“You can be done. I won’t tell anyone how much of a bitch you are,” I answered when I saw that it took him a moment to get to his feet.
I saw fire burning in his eyes as the man’s nostrils flared. He took in a large breath, spit out blood and got back up on his feet. However, this time, he didn’t run at me. He kept his distance and mimicked what I was doing.
“What are you a fucking five year-old? Copying me?” I shook my head.
He didn’t respond, but continued to keep up with my movements.
“Well, copy this, shithead!” I exploded before I punched him hard enough to knock him back. I grabbed his arm, pulled him close to me and kicked my leg under his knees so that he collapsed.
When he was on the ground again, I moved over-top of him to ensure that he was alright, but before I could say anything, he kicked up with all of his might, aiming for my crotch.
I grasped his foot just before it hit me and twisted it so that he had no choice but to flip onto his back. As I did that, I knelt down on his back, so that he couldn’t’ get up and answered, “Wow! You really do fight like a bitch. I could do this all day, but fortunately for your pride, I would like to go. It’s clear who the winner is. See ya around when you grow a sack of balls instead of those lady parts you’ve got up there.” I pushed him away from me and stood up.
However, I heard him behind me, running at me with a blind sense of fury. I turned around quickly, but this time, he wasn’t going to be stopped easily. He wound up and hit my face, but just kept running at me until I lost my balance.
I fell hard onto the mat and immediately felt the man straddle me, before throwing hard jabs at my face.
Before I had a chance to recover, I felt blood come out of my nose and was immediately angry.
With one swipe of my arm, I knocked the man off of me and leapt on top of him. I hit him a few times, until I saw a bruise forming under both of his eyes and his mouth filled up with blood.
At first, when I felt the blood begin to splatter against my knuckles, I knew that I should stop, but just as I had feared, anger had overtaken me.
I wasn’t just angry over the cheap shot. I was also angry over everything that had gone on with Ashley. I was angry over the way I felt and even though I wanted to find it in my usually calloused body to think of her like I think of the other women I fuck, I couldn’t. That made me even angrier. I hated to think that she had gotten the best of me and that was what continued to propel my punches.
However, after a moment I stopped short. I knew that I didn’t really want to hurt this man and it was because of that thought that I was able to pull back. I moved off of him and stared down at the man’s body.
He was bloodied and would probably hurt for a good while, but I didn’t think I had broken anything except maybe his nose. I figured I should be good.
I walked over to the front desk and told them, “Hey, I don’t know what the fuck happened in the boxing room, but I heard some dude moaning. I figured you would want to know.”
“What happened, sir?”
“How the hell should I know?” I demanded, hoping that I had gotten the blood off of my face and hid my hands well enough as to not give myself away. “He could have screwed up with the equipment or he could be jerking off in there. I can’t really tell, but the point is, I am just a concerned citizen trying to help before your ass is on the line any more than it might already be.”
After I made my case, I made sure to walk away. I certainly didn’t need any of this shit following me; especially not for a pussy like whoever the hell that man was.
On the plus side though, I felt much better. My anger had calmed and I was thinking much clearer.
Unfortunately for me, the problem had not fixed itself. It had only become more glaringly apparent.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Ashley
“We need to talk!” Tyler exclaimed as he barged into my room about a week after I had woken up in his bed. It was kind of strange, considering we had not spoken throughout the entirety of the week.
He had left me alone and I had left him alone. I didn’t know what he did and I hadn’t cared. In fact, I had hoped he had lost interest, but that obviously wasn’t the case.
To the best of my knowledge, no one else was home and so, it would have been a good time to discuss the gigantic, attractive and aggravatingly handsome elephant in the room; but I didn’t feel as though I was ready. Still, a week later and I didn’t have any inclination to have this conversation.
I was hurt deeply and I had no interest in opening the wounds that I hoped had begun to heal. Even though I was pleased with the advice that Stacy was able to provide, I still didn’t know if I would be able to go through with that advice. Looking at him now, asking me to talk to him severely challenged my thought process about the whole thing.
My face must have portrayed that thought to him though, because after a pause, he demanded, “Right fucking now!”
Now I really didn’t want to talk to him. I felt my face fall into a scowl before I answered, “Excuse me, Tyler. I am not just some whore that you can boss around whenever you feel like it.”
He groaned and his eye seemed absolutely furious. “I fucking know that, Ashley. That’s…Shit…I know! Can we just talk?” At first, his words started out in a normal tone of conversation, but as he spoke, his voice elevated until he was screaming at me.
I moved back, feeling as though something wasn’t right. However, I didn’t want to just give into him. I had made the decision that I was a young, capable woman who didn’t take anything from anyone, especially my stepbrother…lover…Ewww! I thought, but knew that I didn’t mean it.
Therefore, despite the feeling that I had which told me he actually needed to speak with me, I just glowered at him and answered in a carefully stern tone, “No. I don’t want to talk to you right now.”
Once again, I saw a spark of anger ignite in his eyes, but when he spoke again, he seemed more desperate than angry. “Oh, come on! I came in here to talk to you. I don’t want to trick you, or fucking hurt you, I just want to talk. I think you owe me that, at least.”
“I don’t owe you anything,” I answered coldly. After how he had spoken to me and the way he lived his life, I had decided that I deserved better; and even though he couldn’t see that, I wasn’t about to let him take over my whole life.
However, I couldn’t ignore that it was hard. Even though I couldn’t stop myself from wanting him, no matter how much of a dick he was to me, I knew that Stephanie was right. I didn’t need this kind of negativity in my life. Within my family it made sense. I could deal with him being in my family, because that was just one big ball of negativity. It had been since the moment my mother told us she was sick. But my life: the one that I chose to live, outside of this stupid house and my stupid family, who knew the people in this stupid beach town better than they knew me: was not riddled with the same demons. I had worked hard to make a life for myself that extended past my grief and pain. I had tried my best to make everything work, but when I felt everything slipping through my grasp, I knew what I had to hang onto. Frankly, Tyler wasn’t one of those things.
Even though I didn’t say any of that, I stared at him as
the thoughts ran through my mind and somehow, I believed that he got the message. He staggered back after a long moment looking into my eyes, as though he was pushed, or I had truly voiced something hurtful.
For a moment he didn’t speak. I wasn’t sure if he couldn’t find the right words to say or was fighting against his own mind to not dig himself deeper into the grave of our dying relationship…or whatever it was that you wanted to call it.
“You’re right,” he said suddenly, which really surprised me. That was the last thing that I had expected from him. In fact, if I was asked before this moment, I would have been almost positive that he was incapable of saying such a degrading admission. But just as I was beginning to think that I had heard him incorrectly, he said it again. “You’re fucking right, Ashley. I don’t owe you shit.” He sighed and answered, “You don’t owe me anything either, but I just thought that maybe we could move past all of this crap and maybe come to some kind of arrangement.” He shrugged. “I don’t want to hurt you. I never wanted to hurt you. I just want to talk to you.”
He paused and I couldn’t help but feel as though he was telling me the truth. He did want to make things right, but I also couldn’t ignore the fact that no longer mattered. Things were going absolutely crazy for me and I just needed them to slow down. In order to do that, I truly felt that I needed to back away from him. He had become the only priority in my life this summer and I didn’t even really like him.
So I shook my head and answered, “No, Tyler. I’m sorry, but I can’t talk to you.”
“But you said you wanted to fucking talk!” he exclaimed, coming closer to me. He didn’t look the least bit threatening, but I didn’t want to take the chance, so I pulled farther away from him.
When he saw this, he shot me a look of disappointment and shock, as though my movement had really hurt his feelings; not that he had any.
“I changed my mind. At first, I thought it would be good to talk it out and see where we wanted to go from here, but after thinking about it, I realized that I didn’t want to go anywhere from here.” As I spoke, I heard my voice grow meaner, yet more assured. When I paused to collect my thoughts, I glared at him as though I hated him. I could tell by the look in his eyes that he once again understood how I was feeling without me having to say a word. However, after a moment of silence, I did speak my mind, “At least, I don’t want to go anywhere with you.”
Now, it was Tyler whose face turned angry and hateful. He threw his hands up as he screamed, “Well, fuck you then!” and pivoted around on his heels to stomp out of my room and slam the door.
I watched him leave and when he slammed the door, I felt my lip slide in-between my teeth, just as I bit down lightly, nervously. I flinched at the sound of the door and the rattle it caused to quake throughout the house, but after he had left, I just sat there quietly, holding in any emotion. Even though he was gone, I didn’t want to show any sign of fear or nervousness. My heart was racing inside my chest and my emotions were teetering on the edge of feeling awful for what I had said and how I had gone about everything. But just in case he came back, I didn’t want to worry about Tyler seeing me lose any of my resolve.
So for a long time, I just stayed there, glowering in the direction of the door and hoping that he felt the anger of my piercing gaze as a raging and relentless heat on the back of his neck.
I wanted him to feel what he had put me through. I knew that he understood the passion that we had shared, but I also wanted him to know the pain and the hurt that I had undergone all while trying to make the best out of my situation. I didn’t want to worry about anything anymore. I was done playing this game of cat and mouse, even though I still knew, deep down, no matter how hard I tried to hide it, that I still had feelings for him. But I wasn’t going to let that knowledge get the best of me. I wasn’t about to allow him to take control over my life ever again.
Just as I did when I left for college and reinvented myself, I was going to take control of my life once again. I realized that just because I was in the house where my family, my real family had once vacationed, in a town where everyone knew me, didn’t mean that I still could not effectively reinvent myself.
Therefore, that night, early in the evening, I grabbed my fake ID and headed out on the town.
Tonight, I decided, was going to be a very good night.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Tyler
I had laid fucking low for a little while after the incident at the gym. Although I was sure if anything was going to come from it, legally, then it would have by now, but I still couldn’t be too sure. So I stayed away until I was absolutely sure that the coast was clear. I certainly didn’t want to be charged with anything; not over a fight with that piece of shit.
However, I did curse myself for having a strike of conscious. I was pretty sure if anything, that would be what did me in. It was a stupid move on my part, but then again, it would have been worse if the man died.
Even though I hadn’t shown my face in the gym for a little while, I had monitored the news and there wasn’t even a passing story of a man being beaten to death in the local gym, so I figured I was out of a murder charge. It would’ve been assault at the most and I figured that if they were really looking for me, they would have found me.
After all, I hadn’t up and fucking disappeared.
In a way, I was proud of myself. I hadn’t killed him and with the mood I was in, that was saying a lot.
So, instead of the gym, I had worked out all I could on the beach. It wasn’t the absolute best scenario, but for a little while, it would have to do.
After a week though, I was in dire need of weight training and other essentials to my craft that just couldn’t be substituted by making up my own shit.
It went beyond a want. It was now a necessity and so, I ran over to the gym early that morning.
I had been around a lot of gyms in my life. It was where I felt relatively safe and so I was fairly certain that I understood the social structure. Even for something as big as someone getting the shit beat out of them, a week should be enough time where people were still talking about it in passing, but weren’t actively insinuating.
I prepared myself for chatter and even planned for it.
So when I arrived at the gym that day and flawlessly made it through my reps without so much as a pause, I felt like I could make it through anything that anyone had to say.
However, as I continued my workout, spending ample time in the room with other avid gym enthusiasts, some of which I had come to know by name, no one said anything about what had happened.
A few of them asked me where I was, because they hadn’t seen me all week, but even when I went up to the front desk to buy a bottle of water, speaking to the exact same man who I had informed of my suspicions, he said nothing.
In my paranoid mind, I began to think that perhaps this was all a trick. Was someone trying to fuck me up? Is this some kind of revenge? The accusation seemed laughable and probably would have been if I wasn’t so nervous.
However, I knew that if there were people who were on to me, if I did anything suspicious, it would not help me at all. So I did my best to remain calm.
When I was finished with my workout though, I couldn’t help but make my way down to where the fight had occurred. I went into the room and began to work out, but while I did so, I checked out the area where I had left the man. Everything seemed perfectly fine. There wasn’t a drop of blood, or a body, so I had no idea what was going on.
Maybe he was gone before anyone got down here… I thought, trying to reassure myself, but that didn’t really work.
I had expected someone to say something, but the fact that no one was saying anything, like it hadn’t even happened, was eerie and it made me increasingly uncomfortable. I was all right with dodging questions and playing dumb, but I was not prepared for such a deafening silence.
Therefore, as soon as I left the gym, I realized that I most definitely was in dire need of a d
rink. I decided as soon as I started my run back home, feeling far weaker than I should have, that I was going to go out on the town tonight and try to fucking relax.
I thought about asking Ashley if she wanted to join me, but since all I had received from her from the past week was radio silence, I figured to hell with her.
Deciding that I would return to my old ways, I came to the conclusion that what I truly needed was for tonight to be all about me.
After all, with all of the shit that had gone down throughout this entire summer, with the fucking domino effect that had caused me to freak out and realign all of my priorities, at least temporarily, I needed to get back in touch with the man that I was before meeting Ashley. I needed a night where I could just be me. I could chase girls, be an asshole and enjoy the true and lasting fruits of my labor without any strings attached.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Ashley
The bar was increasingly packed, but that wasn’t such a bad thing for me. Having become a regular at the majority of these bars, I was let in without much fuss and since I was looking for something or someone to take my mind off of my dickhead of a stepbrother, I wasn’t so unhappy with the amount of people surrounding me.
I waded through the crowd toward the bartender, before I ordered a drink and began to sip it slowly as I walked through the mass of people.
I had to say that I looked hot tonight and the fact that I didn’t have anyone holding me back made the situation even better.
There was a part of me that felt free. Tonight, not only was I free from Tyler’s watchful eye, but I was also free from the messed up relationship that I had with the entirety of my family.
Life did not happen. Tonight, I was embracing the idea that I controlled my destiny. Not only would I be able to enjoy myself, but if I wanted something, I was going to do whatever I could to make that wish come true.
Dirty Stepbrother - A Firefighter Romance (The Maxwell Family) Page 100
