by Penny Wylder
He backs me into the wall of the building next to the club. When he reaches for me and grabs my arms, I scream.
8
Ben
I leave the fishing trip early. I can’t get Jenny out of my head, the look on her face when I yelled at her. Even though I did it for her own good, I went about it all wrong. I’m still worried that my ex will destroy the both of us if she finds out we’re together, but I can’t let her rule my life forever. She’s already done enough damage as it is.
I need to find Jenny and apologize. But when I get back to the cabin, I see that she’s not home. None of the girls are. Annie told me she’d stay and watch the boys.
I search the cabin, finding the boys playing with their hand-held video games in the living room.
“Where are the girls?” I ask.
They look at each other, then look at me and shrug. Clearly Annie had made some threats about telling on her because they aren’t very forthcoming with the information.
“Whatever Annie threatened you with, you better believe I can do worse. And I’ll start by taking those video games from you,” I say.
I reach out to take them, but my son is quick to spill. “I heard them say they were going to some club in town to meet boys.”
My stomach drops. Not at the idea of my daughters going out with boys; they’re over eighteen and that’s a given. But the thought of Jenny finding someone else kills me. It’s probably what would be easier for her in the long run, but the selfish part of me wants to keep her all to myself.
My mind starts to wonder about all the trouble the girls could be getting into and worry and jealousy take over. Thinking that my daughters and the girl I love are out there alone with no one to take care of them when this is a town full of horny kids looking to have a summer fling has my blood boiling. I have to find them.
Luckily it’s a small town and there can’t be too many clubs. Except it turns out there are more than I thought, and some of them are more secretive than others. I look in several places and don’t find any trace of them. As I’m driving down the road in my truck, windows down, I hear a scream and I know it’s Jenny’s voice.
I speed toward the sound of the voice and find myself in a sketchy alley behind a dive bar. Jenny is standing in the middle of the alley looking terrified. A boy twice her size is moving toward her and he doesn’t look too happy. When he grabs her by the arm, I throw my truck into park and flash my high beams, getting his attention. When the kid looks my way, holding his hand up to block the glare, I grab him by the throat and pin him against the wall. The piece of shit looks ready to piss his pants. He has no problem picking on a young girl but doesn’t have the balls enough to stand up to a man.
I want to bash his skull against the wall for touching Jenny, but I think I’ve already put the fear of God into him.
“You ever touch anyone like that ever again, I’m going to find you and rip your balls off, do you understand me?” I growl at him.
The kid nods vigorously, and as soon as I let go of him, he runs back into the club.
I reach out to Jenny who is cowered against the wall, but when I touch her hand, she pushes me away.
“Why the hell are you here?” she demands.
I know she’s mad at me and she has every right to be. I fight the urge to take her and hold her against me and tell her how wrong I was for ever thinking I could let her go that easily.
“The boys said you guys went out to the club and I know how horny guys on summer vacation can be. You shouldn’t be out alone,” I say.
“I’m not alone. I’m here with Annie and Tulip.”
“Yeah? Were they going to protect you from that asshole who had his hands on you?”
She tries to walk past me but I step in front of her.
“Why do you even care?” she says, raising her voice. Not quite yelling, but far from the sweet, friendly Jenny I love. “Clearly you didn’t care the other night. And you haven’t seemed to care since then.”
I take her by the shoulders and force her to look into my eyes. “Of course I care, Jenny. That’s why I wanted you to stay away from me.” My voice is too loud. I’m yelling at her, but it’s not her I’m frustrated with. It’s my damn ex-wife and this whole situation. I hate that Jenny and I have to see each other in secret, and it has gotten to a point where we don’t see each other at all.
“Get in the damn truck. I’m taking you home.”
She wriggles out of my grip and gives me a look so angry it makes me grimace. “I’m not going anywhere with you. I’m eighteen. I can do what I want. You can’t choose to dismiss me, then tell me what to do.”
My frustration is about to boil over, and then suddenly that anger turns to regret and then grief. Jenny tries to get away from me when I go to grab her, but I’m faster than she is. When I have her in my grip, I kiss her. This time she doesn’t try to escape me. Her lips part and she sighs as though not kissing me had been hurting her just as much as it had been hurting me. It’s as if we’d both been holding our breath since we parted and this is the first time we’re able to breathe again. This kiss is the salve for the open wound not being with her has caused.
When we part, I brush the hair out of her eyes. She’s wearing too much makeup, I notice. She looks beautiful, but she’s so much prettier without anything covering it up. And I hate it because I know she put on all that makeup to attract other guys. I only want her to try to get my attention. No one else.
“You’re being reckless,” I tell her. “You could’ve been hurt. Or worse.”
“I’m not reckless,” she says, her voice coming out as a whisper.
“Yes you are. If you weren’t, you never would’ve tried to make things work with you and me.”
I kiss her again. This time it’s me being the reckless one. When our kiss ends, her eyes well up with tears and she starts to cry. I hate that I’m the reason for those tears. “I was so mad at you for pushing me away. I want to be with you more than anything. Why do you get to decide what’s good or bad for me?”
“Being with me will cause a rift that will ripple into all facets of your life. It will affect your friendship with my children, with your parents, and my ex will find a way to ruin you. That’s what she does. She hurts people.”
Jenny lifts her head stubbornly. The look on her face is meant to be tough, but it’s too cute for that and I try not to smile. “Being without you hurts more than anything your ex can do to me,” she says. “I love you. Isn’t that obvious? Isn’t that enough?”
Her words hit me like a brick to the heart. I know that I love her and I hoped that she loved me too, but hearing them and knowing it’s real changes everything. I’m both thrilled and horrified at the same time. The consequences of what our love could cause is frightening. Going through with this relationship could ruin everything for both of us.
“You’re better off with someone your own age, someone who doesn’t come with all this baggage,” I tell her. I hate every word that comes out of my mouth. It’s not fair that we have to hide anything. We’re both adults capable of making our own decisions, and yet our choices aren’t our own. Our choices affect everyone around us.
“I’ve tried to fall for others,” Jenny says. “I’ve tried all sorts of ways. We don’t get to choose who we fall in love with. The only person I’ve ever wanted was you.”
I wrap my arms around her and lift her off the ground. “I love you too. I love you so damn much.”
“Dad?” a voice behind us says.
My heart drops at the sound of that voice and my stomach curdles.
I put Jenny back on the ground and turn to see Tulip and Annie standing in the doorway of the club.
9
Jenny
When Ben kissed me, every horrible feeling that had been plaguing me since our fight went away suddenly. But when I heard Tulip’s voice, my entire body went cold with fear. We’ve been caught. The thing I’d been dreading the most.
My whole body shakes as I wa
tch Annie and Tulip standing there staring at us in bewilderment. There’s a strange look of amusement on Tulip’s face mixed with her confusion, but Annie looks pissed. No, not pissed. More like betrayed.
Ben starts to explain, fumbling with his words, then he stops himself when Annie starts to run away. I chase after her down the alleyway. She darts across the road into a drugstore parking lot where she stops and starts to cry under the neon glow of a streetlamp. Bugs hover around the light and they dip down, buzzing around her. She doesn’t seem to notice. If she does, she’s far too hurt to care.
I stop too. She’s my best friend and I want to go to her and make this all go away, but I’m the one who caused her pain. I’ve been so selfish with my feelings for Ben that I haven’t stopped to really consider what would happen with my friendship if we were to be caught. I guess, somewhere in the depths of my mind, I figured she would forgive me, and maybe even be happy for me and her dad because we’re finally happy for the first time in a long time. I realize now that was just wishful thinking and I should’ve considered her feelings more. She’s been through so much lately. I haven’t been a very good friend. Lying and sneaking around may have destroyed our friendship. I want to cry just like she’s crying, but that too feels selfish right now. I need to be strong for her.
She whirls around to look at me. “How could you do this to me? Don’t you think my home is broken enough?”
I hold my twisting stomach. I want to run away from this and pretend it’s not happening, but I can’t.
“I’m so sorry Annie. I can’t help what I feel. I never meant to fall for Ben. I promise.”
“You’re eighteen, Jenny, and my dad is forty-four. He’s a monster. He’s preying on you.”
“That’s not true. He’s not even close to being a monster. He was broken after your mom cheated on him. And the whole divorce stuff really messed him up.”
“You don’t know anything about any of that,” Annie yells.
I yell back at her. “I know a lot about that, actually. I also know that your dad has been happier in these last few weeks than he has in years. Haven’t you even noticed him smiling lately?”
Annie’s shoulders slouch and her anger melts into sadness. I take a deep breath and put my own anger in check. Seems all the screaming has worn us both down.
“Please understand that Ben and I didn’t mean for any of this to happen,” I say. “I would never choose to fall in love with my best friend’s dad. I would never want to ruin my relationship with you. It just happened and we couldn’t help it.”
“We’re happy together,” I plead. All I want is for my best friend to accept us. I can handle my parents. I know they will forgive me eventually. But I really don’t want to lose you. We’ve been friends our whole lives. “How can that be wrong?”
Annie hangs her head. “I just want my family back.”
I walk over to her tentatively, afraid she’ll reject me and push me away, but when I put my arms around her shoulders, she lets me hug her and it’s the best feeling in the world aside from when Ben hugged me.
“You know you can’t force your mom and Ben back together, right?” I say. “No one would be happy in that situation. Not even you. Remember how miserable you were, how you’d come to school crying when your parents would spend the night fighting? It would be the same now as it was then if they got back together.”
Annie starts to cry so hard her whole body shakes, and I hold onto her like my life depends on it. I know our friendship does.
I look over and see Ben standing on the sidewalk. I was so focused on helping Annie that I didn’t hear his truck pull up. Annie looks up and sees him too. I step back as he rushes over to hug his daughter. She lets him hug her which is a good step. She hadn’t even really talked to him since they arrived. Their relationship has been strained since her parents’ divorce.
“I’m so sorry, honey. I never meant to hurt you,” he says to her.
“Is this how it felt when you caught Mom cheating on you?” Annie asks, wiping the tears and makeup from her eyes. She doesn’t say it like she’s blaming him for anything. She just wants to know if he hurt the way she hurt. Like maybe she’s trying to find some common ground between the two of them.
“Honestly, I don’t know,” Ben says. “But it was the deepest betrayal I’ve ever felt the moment I saw your mom with her new lover. I fell apart. It was the last time I could pretend that our marriage wasn’t over. Your mom never really loved me and learning that crushed my heart. I’m just sorry you and your brother and sister had to witness the fallout. And I’m sorry that finding out about me and Jenny this way is hurting you. It’s going to hurt a lot of people I care about. But I love Jenny.” He looks over at me and smiles. Tears glitter in his eyes under the streetlamps. Seeing him so broken hurts me more than I can bear.
At the moment, when I see the acceptance in Annie eyes, it feels like maybe everything will be okay, but then Tulip shows up and says, “We should probably get back to the cabin before the others see that the boys have been left alone.”
My insides turn to cement. It’s time to tell my parents.
10
Ben
I sit out by the lake with John, neither of us talking at first. The sun has gone down, the moon casting a spear of light across the water. A slight breeze rustles the leaves on the trees around us, keeping things from getting too deep in silence.
I could cut the tension in the air with a knife. I know John would love nothing more than to hit me right now after Jenny and I broke the news to him. His wife didn’t take it as hard, but she’s not too happy with me either. I wish this could’ve waited until after the vacation was over, but my daughters finding out put a kink in that plan.
“Dammit, John, say something,” I plead with him. The silence is driving me mad.
John looks at me with disgust and now I’m wishing I could take my words back. Maybe it’s better if he doesn’t say anything after all.
“I’d really like to drown you in the lake right now,” he says.
I nod because I know he doesn’t mean it. He’s just pissed and I don’t blame him. If it had been the other way around and he was having an affair with one of my daughters, I’d want to kill him. “That’s fair.”
“How the hell did this happen?” he asks.
“I don’t know. It just did. One minute she was just Jenny, your daughter. The next she was this woman who I wanted to make laugh, to protect, to never see shed another tear. I want to take care of her. I really love her.”
John stares out into the distance. I can’t read his expression. “Is it serious between the two of you.”
“It is.”
He’s silent again. The bastard has never been silent a day in his life and now he’s doing the one thing he knows I hate. I’d rather be yelled at than ignored and he knows this about me. He’s doing it as a punishment.
I stand up on the dock, ready to leave. I can’t sit here in the quiet.
Before I walk away I say, “Don’t sell the cabin.”
John looks up at me. I’ve finally gotten his attention. “Why not?”
“This place means a lot to Jenny. Some of her best memories are here.”
John sighs. “I don’t have a choice. I need the money to pay her tuition.”
“I’ll pay it,” I insist. “I’ll sell my share of my cabin to my ex—she’s been begging me for full ownership anyway. It will be enough.”
“What about your own kids?”
“Mine have full scholarships and their own funded accounts.” John continues to stare at me, his jaw slack. He doesn’t seem sure if I’m being serious or not and he looks shocked.
“I thought you were having a hardship after paying for the divorce. You never dipped into those funds?”
“I would never be that selfish.”
John shocks the hell out of me by standing up and taking my hand and shaking it. Then pulls me into a bear hug. Is this the part where he throws me into the lake? I wait
for it, but it doesn’t happen. Instead he says, “We’ve been best friends since we were kids. You’re not who I imagined for my daughter, but she couldn’t have chosen a more stand-up guy. At least if she’s with you, I know she’ll be treated right.” He shakes his head. “It’s going to be strange for a while, seeing you together as a couple. But I’ll get over it. I’m not going to stand in your way. And I don’t think I’ve ever seen you as happy as you have these last couple of weeks. You were never this happy with your wife, not even in the beginning.”
“You’re right. I’ve never been this happy before.”
John shakes my hand one more time and I watch him walk away. When he’s out of sight, Jenny steps out of the trees and into the moonlight. She’d been listening in. I smile at her.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, I just really wanted to know what my dad was going to say. And I figured you needed back up in case he tried to kill you,” she laughs.
“He gave us his blessing. And he won’t be selling the cabin after all.”
She seems shocked at first, but her wide open mouth turns to a Cheshire-wide grin and she runs up to me and throws herself into my arms, hugging me tight enough to knock the wind out of me.
The crickets and frogs start to sing. I hold her close to me and listen to the sounds of nature, the soft lap of water as it hits the dock.
“You should be asleep,” I tell her.
“How can I sleep at a time like this?”
I stare at her under the moonlight and anything seems possible now that we have the blessings from our families. My ex-wife is another matter, but there’s nothing she can do now to hurt us.
I touch Jenny’s waist, drawing her near. She shivers when my skin touches hers. I move my hand up to rest just under the swell of her soft breast. She looks up at me with the penetrating gaze of someone in love. She’s hungry for what we both know will happen next. My fingers brush her hard nipple through the fabric of her bikini top. I pinch it and my cock grows harder when she gasps.
