by Beau Brown
“I think it’s fine. There’s a paved road up ahead in a bit. This is the only gnarly spot.”
He sat back, taking my word for it. “Okay, chief. I trust you.”
My chest warmed at his heartfelt words. He had no idea how much it meant to me to have him trust my judgment. I’d spent a lot of my life trying to prove myself, and it felt nice to have him believe in me. “Thank you.”
He glanced over. “For what?”
“For letting me take the lead.”
He laughed. “Why wouldn’t I?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know. You’re an alpha and they don’t always like to give up control. Plus, my dad was such a fuck-up, a lot of people assume I will be too.”
Pulling his brows tight, he scowled. “That’s bullshit.”
“It’s just how it is.”
“Well, it’s still bullshit.”
I grinned. “I agree.” We bumped along for about a quarter mile and then I found a spot to park under a huge mountain ash. I got out and went to the back of the car where the bikes were on a rack. I untied the bungee cords, and he grabbed his bike, rolling it away to give me space to work. Once I had my bike down, we slipped on our helmets and checked over the tires in silence. Finally, he looked up and winked.
“Ready to ride?” He looked relaxed and happy. He often carried a lot of tension in his shoulders and jaw, but at the moment, he seemed at ease.
“Yep. Let’s do it.” We got on and headed toward the East Contrabando Loop trail.
He took the lead, and I followed behind for a while. The route was flat, but jagged and rough, with dark, almost purple, mountains surrounding us. He stopped at one point, breathless with beads of sweat on his forehead. Pointing ahead, he said, “I rode that trail when I was in college with a couple of buddies. It was a hundred and eight miles and we camped out for four nights. It was fun, but I don’t know if I could do that these days.”
“Why not?”
He grinned, his teeth white against his tanned face. “Cuz I’m old.”
“No. If you’re old, then I’m old, and I refuse to be old.”
He chuckled. “Then I guess I’m just out of shape and I like my warm bed too much to do that again.”
I laughed and looked out over the wide expanse of mesquite and creosote. “I know what you mean. Creature comforts mean a lot more to me now than when I was eighteen.” I wiped my face with the back of my arm, enjoying the warmth of the sun on my shoulders.
He pushed off, and we continued along the rugged trail, straining to keep our balance over the shale and uneven terrain. I hadn’t gone riding in at least a year, and my muscles burned as I asked them to perform fetes of agility not required when sitting behind a desk all week.
We rode straight through to lunch, not taking any breaks. Eventually, he slowed and gestured toward a shady spot behind a big, spiky yucca tree.
“Ready for a break?” he asked.
“Yep.” I nodded, thankful for a chance to rest my legs.
There was a smooth boulder at the base of the tall cactus, and we pulled our packs off our bikes and sat there. A gentle, sage scented breeze cooled the perspiration on my legs and arms as I sipped water. Even though I tried not to gawk, my gaze was drawn to his tanned, sinewy calves and thighs. I found him so attractive, it was slightly embarrassing. I hadn’t really lusted after a guy in a long time, so on the one hand it felt good to be interested in someone. But it also made me uneasy, because he’d made it pretty clear he wasn’t looking for anything but sex, and I didn’t want to get too attached.
“What’s it like working with high school kids all day long?” His voice was deep and his gaze focused on me.
I shrugged. “Some days I love it and other days I don’t remember why I chose this profession.”
He frowned. “Really?”
Sighing, I said, “I want to help those kids. But they’re pretty hard to get through to. I guess it's unrealistic to think they could meet with me for five minutes and then feel the need to spill their guts. I’m basically a stranger.”
“Huh.”
I gave a dry laugh. “Ignore me. I’m feeling very disheartened lately.”
“But isn’t this your first year on the job?”
My face warmed. “Yes. Maybe that’s why I’m struggling. Trying to meld the fantasy I had in my head with the reality of the job has been daunting.”
He nodded. “Yeah, okay. I get that. I had the same challenge my first year as a cop. Straight out of the academy, I thought I was going to make such a difference. I assumed the cops who’d come before me just hadn’t cared enough.” He grimaced. “I was wrong. The truth is so many of the people I deal with on a daily basis don’t want my help. They want to keep doing what they’re doing but not get caught. So, that was kind of a letdown my first year on the job. I had to let go of my dreams of being a white knight.”
“I guess we set ourselves up for disappointment in a way.”
“Yeah.”
I studied his angular features. “Being a cop can’t be easy.”
He looked up and held my gaze. “It’s not. But I actually like it more now than I did at first. I understand the job now.”
I sighed. “I looked up to Norm Tomlison so much when I was going to Willowby High.”
“I remember Mr. Tomlison. He was cool.”
“He really helped me handle my troubles at home. When I got onto this career path, it never occurred to me the kids I’d deal with would resent me so much. I’m there to help them. To listen. But they look at me like I’m a cop.” I laughed gruffly.
“I’ll bet you get through to them more than you realize. Kids are great at hiding their true emotions. If you’re listening, and not judging, my guess is you’re doing way more good than you know. Sometimes all we need is someone to listen. Really listen.”
My chest tightened at the sincerity behind his words. “I hope you’re right.”
“You’re simply suffering from first year blues. It happens to everyone.” He smiled warmly. “A new job is the opposite of a romantic relationship. In a relationship, the good part is at the beginning, then you get the blues.”
I chuckled. “When the honeymoon period is over.”
“Exactly.”
I pulled an energy bar from my pack. “Well, I’m not ready to give up just yet.”
“Good.” He also rummaged in his bag for a snack. He tugged a small bag of almonds from his satchel.
I bit into my bar, chewing as I watched him tear open his treat. “It’s so weird to be sitting here with you.”
He glanced up. “Why?”
“Just the whole reconnecting in general is odd. I mean, we didn’t hang out in high school. But now you seem to enjoy my company. I’ll be honest; I’m not sure why you’re hanging out with me.”
“Well, first of all, the sex is hot.”
Heat filled my cheeks. “I know. But we can fuck without taking bike rides together.”
“It wasn’t that I didn’t want to hang out with you back then. I just always got the feeling you thought I was a meat head or something.”
I squinted at him. “Seriously?”
His cheeks seemed pink. “You were super smart. I was good at sports. I was almost afraid to speak around you in case I made a fool of myself.”
My laugh was loud and short. “You have to be joking. I was the loser, not you. Jesus fucking Christ, I could barely form a sentence around you without fainting. You were hot then and you’re hot now.”
He looked pleased as a slow smile spread across his face. “That’s nice of you to say.”
“Come on. That can’t be a surprise to you.”
He grinned. “Nah. I know I’m sexy as hell.”
I laughed and shook my head. “Now your head will get even bigger.”
“Both my heads tend to get bigger around you.” He winked.
“Oh, god.” I snorted.
He lifted his little bag of almonds and poured some into his open mouth. As he ch
ewed, he watched me with a funny expression. His intense gaze made my pulse spike and my cock warm. I felt out of my depth with him. I hadn’t been lying when I’d implied he was the cool kid, and I didn’t understand why he was hanging out with me.
“Can I ask you something?” My voice was soft.
“Sure.”
“It’s personal.”
“That’s fine.” He crunched on his almonds, eying me.
“Why aren’t you in a committed relationship? I mean, I doubt it’s lack of opportunity.”
He clenched his jaw. “I’m just not ready for that chapter.”
“But I have to wonder why.”
“You don’t have to wonder why.”
I laughed. “Maybe it’s my job. I question why a person who seems mature and has a stable life wouldn’t give into the pressure I know you must feel. There’s no way your family isn’t nagging you to follow the usual pattern of finding an omega and having offspring.”
“No. You’re right. My mom hounds me on a regular basis.” He avoided my gaze.
“But you don’t give in.”
“No. I do not.” He flicked his gaze up to mine. “I could ask you the same thing. Why don’t you already have an alpha? You too seem mature and you have a good job.”
I shrugged. “My situation is very different. I never had a loving example to follow. My parents were a mess. My career is the only really stable thing in my life. I chased it and I got it. I’m not giving it up to spend my time on paternity leave so I can pop out babies. I don’t give a fuck what society says I should do.”
He laughed gruffly. “You’re really passionate about this.”
“Yeah. I am. You can have a family and still be you. Nothing changes that much for you. But I’d have to have the babies. Everything would change for me.” I frowned. “It takes a lot of trust to enter into that sort of agreement with someone. I’ve never found anyone I thought deserved that trust.”
He nodded. “Me neither.” He cleared his throat as he tucked the empty almond bag away. “But that isn’t really why I don’t conform.”
I frowned. “What then?”
“My parents have a great marriage and partnership. It’s almost made me intimidated to even try and find something like they have. I mean, they really love each other. I can’t imagine being able to have what they have. It’s effortless. They actually like each other and they’re so close. I look around and, yeah, a lot of omegas and alphas are having families. But how often do you see a truly happy couple? I just see a lot of people going through the motions and doing what’s expected of them.”
My stomach tumbled at his earnestness and I was excited because I agreed with every word. “God, yes. That’s it exactly. There are so many unhappy people mindlessly following the rules. It’s their life. Don’t they even care that they are spending their life with people who they don’t even seem to like?”
His eyes were bright. “Right? What’s the rush?”
I smiled, feeling gratified. “It’s nice to talk to someone who gets it. Most of the omegas I know just want to find an alpha to take care of them. I’m like, fuck that. I’ll take care of myself.”
His smile was warm. “I agree. It’s a relief to have said that out loud. I feel unburdened.” He cupped his mouth and yelled out into the desert. “I don’t have to get married if I don’t want to!”
I chuckled. “Amen. I refuse to be pressured. I’m holding out for the real deal.”
“Me too.” He held my gaze, his cheeks flushed.
I slid off the rock and dusted the dirt off my backside. “Shall we keep going in the same direction?”
He nodded, his gaze keen. “Absolutely. I’m not ready to stop yet.”
Chapter Eight
Brock (Again!)
We rode the park trails until the orange afternoon sun began to drop in the sky. The day had gone by so quickly, it was hard to believe my weekend was over. We packed up the bikes and headed home, laughing and talking all the way back to town.
I wanted to ask him to dinner, but for whatever reason, I felt kind of timid about doing that. We’d spent the whole day together already, and maybe he just wanted to get home. I had to take him to my place first because he’d driven over to my house earlier so we could just take one car to the desert. As we neared my little home, my heart rate sped up and my hands seemed sweaty on the steering wheel.
He shifted toward me. “Can I buy you dinner?”
Surprised at his sudden question, excitement spiraled through me. “Tonight?”
He laughed. “Are you sick of me? Would you rather I just go home?”
I shook my head. “No. Not at all.”
He exhaled as if releasing a nervous breath. “Okay. Good.”
“Did you want to go straight to dinner?”
Glancing down at his dusty jeans, he grimaced. “I feel like I should clean up first.”
“Oh. Sure. Did you want to go home and just meet up somewhere?”
“Um…” He rubbed his chin. “I hadn’t thought it through to be honest.”
I swallowed nervously as an idea came to me. “You could shower at my place and I could cook us dinner.”
“I don’t want to put you out like that. I wanted to treat you because you drove.”
I smiled. “To be honest, I love the idea of eating dinner with you, but I’m tired. I could whip up something real simple for us and we could just relax at my place. Unless you have your heart set on going to a restaurant.”
He studied me in silence and then he said softly, “I really just wanted to spend more time with you. I don’t give a shit about eating at a restaurant.”
A jolt of happiness went through me. “Oh, well, same here.”
“Great.” He turned back toward the window as I parked in my driveway.
I was surprised he’d been so willing to admit he wanted to spend more time with me. He seemed to actually be pursuing the ‘friends’ part of friends with benefits, and not just the ‘benefits’ part. That came as a shock to me. My take on this type of arrangement was it focused mostly on the sex. But Trevor seemed to genuinely enjoy my company even when we weren’t fucking.
I let us into the house, tossing my keys in the bowl near the door. “Should we bring the bikes inside?”
“You have a lock on the rack. I’m not worried.” He grinned. “I happen to know the crime rate on your street is super low.”
“Oh, yeah. You’d be the one with that info.” I faced him. “Do you want to shower first?” I hoped I sounded nonchalant. I didn’t feel that way. I felt excited and breathless having him in my house again.
He took a step closer and my pulse spiked. His gaze was glittery and intense. “I want you to shower with me.”
I swallowed loudly. “You do?”
He nodded and ran his gaze over my face and then my body. “Yeah.”
Okay. I guess he’s pursuing the benefits part too.
“Is that because you need me to wash your back?”
“Not really. I was thinking more that I’d like you wet, naked and begging for my cock.”
My legs were weak as I swayed against him. “Shit. You have a way with words.”
He put his hands on my hips and pulled me closer. “I really enjoyed our day together, and I even told myself I wasn’t going to make any moves on you today. I was just going to keep it light and friendly.”
“But you changed your mind?”
“Yeah. I’ve changed my mind.” He kissed me softly, working my lips gently. When he lifted his head he smiled. “Is that okay?”
“I’ll push through… somehow.”
His mouth twitched and his body was warm and hard against mine. “I’m still willing to take you out to dinner instead.”
“Um, no. Staying in sounds nice.”
He laughed.
“Follow me.” I moved away from him, finding it difficult to walk with my hard-on. When we entered my bedroom, we both stripped quickly, watching each other but not speaking. I
grabbed the lube and a condom and went into the bathroom first to turn on the shower. Once the water was warm, I stepped in carefully, and he joined me.
He smiled at me as he stood under the shower, letting the water cascade down his head and torso. “This feels so fucking good.” He blew water off his lips, looking cocky.
I wedged the condom and lube on the little white shower caddy, and grabbed the shower gel. Smoothing it over my arms and chest, I held his heated gaze. I slipped my hand down my stomach toward my cock and lathered up my balls and dick, smiling at him challengingly.
“Need any help with that?”
“Nah. I got this.”
“Soon I’m gonna have that.” His voice rumbled in the small space. He moved out from under the spray and pressed me against the wall.
The cold tiles against my spine made me wince, but mostly I was distracted by the press of his swollen dick against mine. I wound my arms around his neck, pressing closer. “You’re like the best friend I’ve ever had.” I smirked.
He kissed the side of my neck, sending shivers of pleasure down my spine. He nibbled a trail along the top of my shoulder, and then, dipping his head, he captured one of my nipples and sucked hard.
“Fuck,” I wheezed, stiffening as he tugged with his teeth. I squeezed my fingers into his shoulders.
Smiling, his cheek curved, and he flicked his gaze up to mine. “I like that your nipples are sensitive.”
“You know what else is sensitive? My cock. Want to suck that too?” I rolled my hips, sliding our shower-gel slick shafts together.
He groaned and then said softly, “Patience, Brock.”
“Why? Maybe I don’t feel like being patient.”
“Is that right?”
“Yeah,” I said breathlessly, lust curling in my gut. “Maybe I want you to just fuck me already.”
He straightened, his nostrils flared. “I can do that. I’ll happily do that.” He slipped his hands around me and squeezed my ass-cheeks, stroking a finger over my hole. “You want me inside you, Brock?”
I licked my lips, excitement growing. “I wish you didn’t have to wear a rubber.” I was embarrassed I’d blurted that out, but my comment seemed to turn him on even more.
