by Mina Quin
He quivered when an orgasm swept over his, his sheath convulsing around Camden’s, and he groaned as he came. Warm splashes of his seed coated his insides, enhancing his own release as Camden’s knot swelled to lock them together for the next little while. As he clung to him, Wil couldn’t help thinking there had never been a more perfect wedding night for two people before, whether or not they were in love.
Chapter Four
Wil stared at the display window of the pregnancy test, willing it to say “pregnant.” This was their third month of trying, and while that was nothing in the scheme of things, it was still disappointing to both of them. Not that they hadn’t enjoyed trying to conceive their baby, he thought with a grin as he looked at himself in the mirror. Camden had seemed to make it his personal mission to ensure his empty womb was filled with his seed.
They made love many times per day, whenever they could steal some time from their obligations. Nights were spent in blissful discovery, until he knew Camden’s body as well as his own. He didn’t think that part of the marriage would change even after he got a positive pregnancy test, so he wasn’t dreading the end of their sex life.
That had been just one of the areas where they discovered mutual compatibility. They shared similar views on several subjects and had comparable interests and tastes. So far, their marriage had been happy one, and he didn’t regret his choice at all. There was only one thing he regretted about the union, and that was his inability to quash his growing love for his husband.
He sighed as he looked down at the pregnancy test, which still didn’t display the answer. Had he really thought he could share his body and his life with Camden, the Alpha to whom he was already drawn, and not end up falling head-over-heels in love with him?
Had the self-delusion been deliberate, to convince himself it was okay to marry Camden even under those circumstances? Or had he been naïve enough to think deep in his heart that he could encourage Camden to love him? He didn’t know, and he didn’t want to think about it too much.
It was obvious Camden cared for him, and he was gentle and attentive, but he had never said anything even approaching, “I love you,” and he didn’t seem to be on the verge of doing so either. On the other hand, there were times when he could barely hold back the declaration—usually when they were in bed, in the throes of passion, but even sometimes in the quiet moments, such as when they shared the paper over breakfast, and he looked up to see the sunlight reflecting off Camden’s brown hair. Wil’s fingers would itch to reach out and stroke the strands as a swell of love consumed him, and he would have to distract himself with something, anything to keep from spilling the words.
With a shake of his head, vowing to harden his resistance and keep fighting the emotions until he saw something similar building in Camden, he looked at the test again. Finally, the answer showed on the display. “Pregnant.” With a whooping sound, he scooped up the testing and went running down the hallway to Camden’s office, knowing he would be just as eager to hear the results he had been to discover them.
He lay on the couch in his office, the Dictaphone machine nearby, and his Bluetooth headset in his ear. Camden was snoring softly, and Wil paused to stare down at him for a moment, feeling one of those earth-shattering swells of love. He looked so peaceful, and he was happy to find him having a rest. He still worked too hard, as attested by his paleness and lines of tension even in sleep, and though Wil doubted that would ever change a lot, Camden would definitely have to slow down when the baby came.
Remembering the task that had brought his to the study, he bent over him and stroked his fingers down Camden’s cheek. He turned his head slightly to nuzzle Wil’s hand, and his eyes were slightly unfocused when he opened them a millisecond later. He gave him a gauzy smile, clearly still half-asleep, before he blinked.
A moment later, the dream-haze faded, and he looked alert again. “What time is it?” he asked with a frown.
Wil glanced at the wall clock. “It’s three p.m.” Technically, he should have waited until the following morning to test, according to the instructions, but he hadn’t had the patience to wait.
His frown grew. “I fell asleep?” With a sigh, he sat up on the couch. “I guess you’re keeping me too busy at night, my sweet Omega.” His blue eyes twinkled as he teased him.
“For a good purpose,” he admonished.
With a small growl, he put his arms around his waist and pulled Wil down beside him on the sofa. “Pleasure?” Camden bent his head to nibble on his neck, which seemed to be his favorite spot.
“Mm, yes, but something else too.” Gently, he pushed him away to show him the pregnancy test. “Positive,” he said with a happy giggle. Camden’s eyes widened as he read the word, and then he beamed. Wil had never seen him smile so much before, and the sight was breathtaking.
He let out a sound of excitement before kissing him hard and fast. Camden took the test from his hand and stared at it a moment longer, as though suspicious it would suddenly change the result. Then he tossed it on the table to wrap his arms around him.
“Hey,” Wil protested. “Don’t lose that. I want to save it for the baby book.”
He arched a brow. “You’re going to put a urine-soaked stick in the baby’s memory book? I hope you have a bio-hazard bag.”
“Spoilsport.” He stuck his tongue out at him, but conceded his husband had a point. “Okay, I’ll just take a picture.”
“Much better idea.”
He yelped with surprise when Camden lifted him to sit sideways on his lap. When he pushed him backward, he let him with a measure of curiosity as his head touched the arm of the leather sofa. Was he planning to try something new and kinky? Wil’s stomach quavered with excitement.
It was certainly something new, but nothing kinky or sexual. It was about the sweetest thing he’d ever seen when Camden bent his head to bring his mouth near Wil’s lower abdomen. He cupped his stomach as he spoke to their baby.
“Hello in there, little one. I’m your daddy.” He patted his stomach. “Your current residence is provided by your papa, and he’s going to be the most important person in your life. I speak from experience,” he added in a pseudo-whisper.
Wil’s heart melted, and he let out a small sigh.
“And you’re going to be my future and my legacy, little one.” He kissed his tummy before laying his cheek against the place where Wil would soon ripen.
Optimism filled Wil as he stroked his hair. Camden was clearly excited about their first child, and he had come closer than ever to admitting he loved him. Surely, this pregnancy would bring them closer than ever and give him the final push he needed to love his as much as he loved him.
Chapter Five
He didn’t understand it, but instead of bringing them closer, the pregnancy seemed to be pushing them farther apart. In the beginning, Camden had been so attentive, even rearranging his schedule to take care of Wil during the worst three weeks of morning sickness, when he was sure he would die. After that phase had passed, he was still with him a lot, though he had to go back to working more frequently.
Camden had seemed enthralled with the changes in his body, carefully measuring the bump of his slightly expanding stomach each night, as though ensuring he didn’t miss the tiniest increment of growth. He talked to their baby every night, and he still made love to Wil almost as frequently once the nausea passed around fourteen weeks.
At first anyway, but over the past two months, he’d started working more again. Initially, he’d understood the need for him to catch up after taking a break, but then he’d started working more from his corporate office again, and there were nights he stayed in the company’s executive apartment rather than come home to Wil. Oftentimes, when he did come home, Camden didn’t even cuddle with him, let alone try to make love with Wil. He just laid down, rolled away from Wil, and went to sleep.
Now, as he sat across from Nathan while they sipped tea in a tiny Japanese-themed teahouse in the city, just a few blocks from
his obstetrician, he sighed. “I don’t know what’s happened, but he hardly spends time with me at all. He didn’t even show up for the gender ultrasound today, and it’s been on his calendar for a month. I even reminded him this morning via text.”
Nathan took a sip of oolong before answering, as though marshalling his thoughts. Or censoring his words, since he could be blunt sometimes. “He runs a multibillion dollar corporation, Wil. Are you sure he’s not just overworked and tired? He took off a lot of time during your first trimester.”
He lifted a shoulder. “I guess that could be it. I mean, that’s what I told myself in the beginning, but I don’t understand why he’s going in to the office most days now when he used to be able to work from home. When he gets home, he does more work, eats a bit sometimes, and then goes to bed.”
“He sounds exhausted…”
“But?” Wil probed when his friend trailed off and didn’t resume speaking.
Nathan licked his lips, looking hesitant. “But maybe…oh, I don’t know.”
“Maybe he’s lost interest now that I’m pregnant?” He touched his bump. “Maybe he finds me repulsive? Or maybe I just filled my role of broodmare, and now he’s back to screwing all the women and Omegas available to him? I doubt a wedding ring on his finger would stop most of them. Or him,” he added sadly, wishing he had broached the subject of fidelity before the marriage, instead of being cowardly.
Nathan sighed. “I don’t know, Wil. You know I’m not one for false hope or lying to soften the blow.”
Wil nodded. “That’s true.”
“So keep that in mind when I say I don’t think he’s having affairs, especially not during the day when he’d have to be working.”
Wil frowned. “He stays overnight at his apartment sometimes too, though the helicopter could have him home in thirty minutes.”
Nathan sipped his tea again. “I can’t explain why he’s doing that, but I truly don’t think he’s being unfaithful. He looks at you like you’re a constant source of amazement to him, as though he’s still trying to figure out how he got so lucky.”
Wil snorted softly, glaring into the dregs of tea in his bone china cup. “Not hardly. He’s never even said he loves me.”
Nathan’s lips pursed. “I think that’s complete crap on his part, but you both agreed to a loveless marriage. I don’t think either of you stuck to that negotiation point.” He stabbed his golden spoon in Wil’s direction for emphasis. “You love him, and I think he loves you. Whatever’s going on with your husband is probably something far less torrid than you’re imagining.”
“But—”
Wil’s friend sighed heavily, clearly irritated. “Just tell him you love him, Wil. I’ll bet he says the same, and then you can ask him about why he’s spending so much time away from you and the baby.”
Wil nodded, seeing the wisdom in the advice, though positive he wouldn’t be able to follow it. The idea of just blurting out his love for Camden and risking the loss of the fragile bonds still between them was more than he could bear. Perhaps once the baby came, he’d feel more secure and braver.
Or he’d find another excuse to delay.
He curled his lip at that annoying voice whispering in his mind and focused on his tea. Nathan’s observations had soothed him some, and he was hopeful he had overreacted by jumping straight to the conclusion Camden was cheating on him. Maybe he could find a delicate way to ask him what he was doing later that night. Even better, maybe he could seduce Camden and start to restore some of the lost closeness.
***
Wil’s plan to bridge the gap between the two of them was thwarted by the fact he didn’t come home that night. As usual, he called around seven p.m. to tell Wil he was staying overnight in the city, and while he appreciated that Camden still bothered to at least tell him he wouldn’t be home at night, it hurt deeply.
It was even more painful that he hadn’t asked about the gender ultrasound to find out if they were having a boy or girl. Without Camden being there, he had been reluctant to find out the answer, so he still had a sealed envelope in his jacket pocket with the results of the ultrasound. Wil’s idea had been for them to open it together, but now he wondered if they would have the opportunity any time soon.
Tired, weepy, and out-of-sorts, Wil went to bed early, deciding he would worry about their distance tomorrow. If he didn’t find a way to bring them back together, or at least closer, soon he didn’t see how the marriage could survive.
***
A couple of days later, Wil was getting incredibly frustrated with his continued absences. He’d stayed overnight the last two nights, and he had only texted to let him know, forgoing even a simple phone call. Annoyed, Wil held his cell phone in one hand and the ultrasound envelope in the other. If he didn’t care enough to ask about the baby, why should Wil bother to wait for him? On a tide of anger, he opened the envelope with a slice of his nail.
The sepia-toned four-dimensional photo slid out into his hand, and he stared at his baby as the words “I’m a girl” penetrated the haze. Tears burned his eyes, not from disappointment at the gender, but from Camden not being there for the big reveal.
He touched the baby’s face in the ultrasound photo, almost believing he could make out Camden’s nose, though he knew that was probably his own imagination. “Don’t worry, baby. Papa will be here for you.” It hurt his heart to imagine Camden wouldn’t be, especially when he had been so excited in the beginning.
Bewilderment and anger merged together until he scooped up the cell phone and dialed Camden’s office number with ruthless precision. He wasn’t answering his cell phone, so he would try to get to him through regular channels. He had made up his mind enough was enough, and if he had to, he would camp out in his office.
The receptionist answered on the first ring and transferred WIl to his executive assistant. Her crisp greeting made Wil frown. He had met the efficient woman more than once, and he knew how attractive Sabrina was. He found himself wondering if his husband was sleeping with his EA, and it made his voice colder than he had intended. “I want to speak to my husband please.”
There was a brief pause. “Is this Mr. Marsh?”
Wil’s lips compressed, though he supposed it was a fair enough question. Maybe Sabrina didn’t recognize his voice yet, since he typically called Camden’s cell phone, not his office number. “Yes, this is Wil Norris-Marsh.”
“Oh, thank goodness.” Relief punctuated Sabrina’s tone. “Where is your husband, Mr. Norris-Marsh? Camden hasn’t been into the office for days, and we’re all getting quite concerned about him.”
Wil’s stomach tightened with a combination of fear and anger. Camden had been lying to him all this time, and apparently, he’d also been lying to his employees. Just what the hell was he up to? “I’m sorry, but I think I must have gotten my days mixed up. I’ll call back later.” He hung up before Sabrina could press for more answers or respond. He had no intention of sharing his marital drama with Camden’s executive assistant, and it seemed clear it had escalated to the melodramatic.
Wil sat on the sofa for a while, trying to decide how he should proceed. He could order the helicopter to take him to the city, or he could have the driver take him, but what good would it do? He supposed he could get the corporate apartment address from Sabrina or the receptionist, but what if he wasn’t there? It seemed unlikely that he was, since he was ditching the office too.
Wil’s head spun with the possibilities, and he got up to pace while he tried to decide on a course of action. Camden had no family nearby, and Wil had never met any of his close friends, because he’d said they all lived far away too. It wasn’t like he hid Wil away in the country, because he had been with him to office functions and social events, meeting the people he interacted with on a daily basis, but Camden had claimed none of them were more than business associates or acquaintances.
Several hours passed as he paced and worried, trying to figure out what he should do. Part of him wanted to p
ack his bag and run back home to his brother, or to Nathan’s place. It would send a message to his husband, but was it the point he wanted to make? Did he want to run out on his marriage as soon as things got rough? Though it seemed like Camden had already started the process of parting, Wil wasn’t the type of person to just give in and give up. If he had been, Ross never would’ve had the chance to hit him a second time.
He didn’t think this was anything like the situation with Ross, of course. Camden wasn’t violent, but in a strange way, he was hurting him worse than Ross had ever done. The emotional pain far exceeded the physical pain when his ex-boyfriend had assaulted him. Vowing he would find a way to tell Camden that, and deciding he would issue an ultimatum—either he came home and changed back to the man he had been, or Wil wanted his own place and space, along with a trial separation—he scooped up his phone and started to dial his driver.
He was on the third digit when the door opened. With a frown, he went to meet Camden in the hallway. A blast of cold air came in with him, a sharp reminder it was January, and though they were between snowfalls, a dusting still covered the ground.
He eyed Camden with a critical eye, deciding he looked tired and drawn. Whatever he was doing was clearly draining him, but Wil had difficulty finding sympathy when he had no explanation for his actions. “Where have you been?”
He paused in the process of removing his jacket, scowling. “I’ve been at work.”
He shook his head. “Not according to Sabrina, and not for several days. You haven’t been at work, and you haven’t been at home, so where have you been? Or should I ask who have you been with? This is no way to have a marriage, Camden.”
He exhaled sharply, his shoulders slumping for just a second as he rubbed a hand down his face. Then his posture straightened, and he looked down at Wil with a distant expression. “I’ve been doing something important. That’s all you need to know.”
