Tears filled her eyes, and she shook her head. “You don’t know what you’re saying.”
“Yes, I do. I love you, Sophia Alexander. Maybe I haven’t done this the best way, and I haven’t got you a big ring or booked a fancy place to do this in, but I want you to be my wife.”
Her mouth dropped open. She hadn’t been expecting that.
“Wife? You mean get married?”
“That’s kind of how it works.”
“But it’s not fair on you,” she said. “You can’t want to marry me when the chances are I won’t be able to give you all the things a wife should be able to give her husband. I’m going to have to come into the hospital three times a week for the rest of my life.”
“Not if you find a donor,” he interrupted.
“The chances of that are low, Rocco. And even if one does happen to come along, it might not take. Donor kidneys fail all the time. And it’s not just about the hospital trips. There’s only a very small chance of me ever getting pregnant, and even if I did, it would be extremely high-risk, and the chances are that the pregnancy will end in miscarriage. If you want a family in the future, you need to find someone else, because I won’t be the one who can give that to you.”
Tears streamed down her face now, and he pulled her in and kissed the salt from her cheeks. “Hey, I want to marry you, not some imaginary future baby.”
“You feel that way now, but in a few years things might be different.”
He shook his head. “No, they won’t. I’ve loved you my whole life, and nothing is going to change that. And I don’t care what sacrifices I have to make in order to be with you. I’ll give up everything, because nothing else matters unless I’m with you.”
She choked back a sob and gripped on tightly to his shoulders, holding him as hard as she could, never wanting to let go. She didn’t know what she’d done to deserve him coming back into her life again, but now he was here, she couldn’t imagine trying to live without him. Even the thought terrified her.
“I’m just scared that you’ll say all this now, but a few years down the line, when I’ve come to depend on you, you’ll realise it’s too much, and you’ll be gone.”
“I’ve got no reason to lie to you, Sophia. You’ve given me an out, if I wanted to take it, and I’m telling you I don’t. My whole world is you, and that isn’t going to change. I swear my life on it.”
Chapter Fifteen
It broke Rocco’s heart to see her this way. He’d meant every word he’d said, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t love to see her strong and healthy, and even carrying his baby one day. He wanted her to be his wife, even if none of those things happened, but he wanted her to have all those things, too.
When he stepped out of the room, he spotted one of her nurses walking down the corridor, and he hurried to catch up.
“Excuse me, Nurse.”
She turned to him with a smile. “It’s Linda. What can I do for you?”
“How would I go about getting tested to see if I’d be a match for Sophia? For her kidney, I mean.”
The nurse, Linda, frowned. “Is this something you’ve really thought about? You must consider the implications. If you’re left with only one kidney and something happens to it, you’ll end up in the same position as Sophia.”
“I know that. If it means I get to sit beside her every three days, then I’m fine with that, too.”
“And you know your chances of being a match are slim, and that donor kidneys don’t always take. There’s a chance you’ll donate your kidney, only for it to fail, and then you’ll have put yourself through all of that for nothing.”
He nodded. “I know. I’ve done my research, I’m aware of what I’m letting myself in for, but honestly, it’s nothing compared with what Sophia has been battling for the last ten years.”
She smiled and patted him on the arm. “She’s very lucky to have you.”
“Can I ask something else?”
“Of course.”
“Can you keep this between us? I don’t want to give her any false hope, in case it doesn’t happen.”
“I think she’d like to know what you’re prepared to put yourself through for her,” she said.
“Maybe, but she’ll find all that out if I’m a match anyway, won’t she?”
She nodded and smiled again. “Yes, that’s true. The test doesn’t take long to do, and the results come back quickly.”
“Thanks, Linda.”
“You’re more than welcome.”
He was nervous but determined. This was what he wanted more than anything.
TWO DAYS LATER, SOPHIA was discharged from hospital.
Of course, it was not the last she’d see of the place—far from it. Rocco hated that she had to go back to her parents’ house, while he was still in his flat share. He’d told her that he’d get her a ring, but she said it wouldn’t be much use anyway, as she wasn’t allowed to wear them due to the fluid build up and the swelling. He hated that they wanted to get married but they couldn’t even live together yet or even wear an engagement ring. But he couldn’t ask Sophia to come and live in the crappy three-bedroom place with the other guys—especially not when she was sick—and he still needed to be able to get into work every day, so he couldn’t stay at her parents. Not that he’d ask to do that anyway.
He hadn’t told anyone about taking the test to see if he could be a donor. If it came back that they were a match, he wanted to be able to surprise Sophia with it. He knew she’d probably give him an argument and tell him that he didn’t need to do it, but it didn’t matter what she said. If he could give her this gift, then he’d do it happily.
She was still a little fragile after the pneumonia, but he did his best to remember what she’d said about the reasons she’d not told him why she was so sick in the first place. She hadn’t wanted him to treat her any differently to any other woman, and he did his best to make things as normal as possible. They cuddled up on the couch or in bed during the evenings, watching Netflix, and ordering the occasional takeaway, though Sophia needed to be extra careful about what she ate because of all the salt. It was hard, though, not to always have her illness at the front of his mind, and he understood why she’d kept its severity from him for so long. There was fear in his heart now that he might lose her one day—and not lose her because she’d decided to leave him or move away this time, but lose her for good.
Then he got the call.
Chapter Sixteen
They’d been planning a trip to the cinema to watch the latest Marvel release, but by the time the evening rolled around, Sophia found she was too tired to go out. Instead, Rocco arrived at her parents’ house, and they squirreled themselves away in her room. Sophia’s parents had begrudgingly accepted Rocco’s presence in her life. After he’d dropped everything and raced to her side when she’d been in hospital, and had shown up every day to see her, they’d seen the pair were serious about each other. The marriage proposal had also come as a surprise to them, but they’d told Sophia they wouldn’t hold her back from what she wanted. Though no one said it out loud, she knew they were all thinking the same thing. There was a good chance her life would be shorter than most. Saying ‘I do’ to Rocco might not mean the possible fifty years of marriage most people had ahead of them at her age, and she didn’t have the time available to most to put things off.
He was quiet that evening as they lay on her bed, watching television. She kept looking over at him, noting the way his brow was furrowed, his lips pinched. Maybe she was worrying unnecessarily, and his silence didn’t have anything to do with her. Perhaps something at work was bothering him.
“Is everything okay, Rocco?” she forced herself to ask, after the silent minutes had stretched to an hour. “You seem like something is on your mind.”
He bit his lower lip and shifted around on the bed to face her. “There’s something I have to tell you.”
To her horror, his eyes filled with tears. She’d never seen him cry before�
�at least not since he’d been about nine years old. Even when his father had died, he’d been clearly distressed, but he’d never shed a tear.
“Oh, my God, Rocco. What’s the matter? What’s wrong?”
He shook his head. “I failed you.”
Her stomach plunged. “What are you talking about?” She was terrified about what he was going to say. Had he met someone else? Had he decided this was all too much for him and was going to leave her? She didn’t want to hear what he was going to say but knew she needed to.
“I had myself tested to be a donor, so you could get a new kidney, but I wasn’t a match.”
She stared at him. That had been the last thing she’d expected him to say, but with his words, all her fears were swept away. “You did that for me?”
He nodded and angrily swiped away at a tear that slid down the side of his face. “I wanted so badly to make you well again. I couldn’t think of any better way than for you to carry a piece of me inside you, but it won’t work because I’m not a match.”
“Oh, baby.” She held her arms out to him, and they slotted against each other, bodies held tight, faces pressed to skin, fingers knotted in hair. “I can’t believe you’d do that for me.”
“But I can’t. That’s the whole point. I’d wanted to give you that more than anything in my life, but it’s been taken out of my hands.”
She pulled away so she was able to look into his face. “Lots of things are taken out of our hands in this world. We just have to learn how to live with them and make the best of what we have. We still have each other, and that’s what counts.”
“I know, it just would have been so right, if I’d been able to do that. They warned me the chances were I wouldn’t be a match, but I still pinned my hopes on it.” He shook his head again. “Stupid of me.”
“No, it wasn’t stupid. It was wonderful. I can’t tell you what it means to me that you’d put yourself through that for me.”
“I love you so much, Sophia. I always have. I’d literally put myself through anything for you, if I could.”
She leaned in and placed her lips to his, tasting the salt from his tears. He kissed her back, and she put her hand to his cheek.
“I love you, too. That’s why we’re going to get married and be together forever now, or at least as long as forever is for us.”
“I’ve got some other news,” he told her, a smile finally touching his lips.
“You do?” she said, wondering what it could possibly be.
“The paperwork has all gone through on my father’s house. It belongs to me now, and I’ve decided to sell it. You’d be amazed just how much a little coastal property in Cornwall goes for these days. They’re not quite London prices, and we won’t be able to buy a similar property up here, but it’s enough to get us a small flat to start us off.”
She widened her eyes at him. “Are you serious?”
He nodded, his lips pressed together. “Deadly. We can start house hunting, if you want. Or flat hunting, at least. Find place of our own.”
She squealed. “Oh, my God, Rocco. That’s amazing. Our very own place. No more flatmates or parents.”
“Nope.”
She thought the grin was going to split her cheeks. “I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy.”
He returned the grin. “Then my job is done.”
Chapter Seventeen
They decided there was no reason for a long engagement. Life had already taught them they needed to grab what they had with both hands, and there was no point in waiting for a possible perfect moment that may never happen. Life was too delicate to waste in waiting. They needed to live for the moment.
A month later, their wedding day dawned bright and sunny, but not too hot, a perfect autumn day in London. They were having a small service at a registry office in south-east London, followed by a get-together at a local pub. It wasn’t going to be a big, flashy event, and they were both more than happy with that. They didn’t spend the night prior to the wedding apart, either, not wanting to spend a single night where they weren’t together.
Sophia’s ivory dress had long, lace sleeves, and her red hair was loose in curls around her face. Her father was to give her away, while her mother sat in the front row, wiping tears from her face. Everyone else from Carved in Ink was there, too. Art sat with Tess, his arms slung around her shoulder, while Kane and Holly sat with Holly’s six-year-old son between them, the boy looking dapper in a little suit of his own.
Rocco looked insanely handsome in a dark blue, three-piece suit, and her heart swelled at the sight of him. He took her hand in front of the registrar—a rotund woman in her fifties—and leaned in to whisper in her ear.
“I’ve never seen anything more beautiful.”
His eyes shone with unshed tears, and she had to swallow her own tears of happiness.
The service went perfectly, with Rocco and Sophia grinning stupidly at each other as they said their vows, and then they slipped a ring onto each other’s fingers. Sophia wouldn’t be able to keep the ring on for any length of time, but Art had offered to do them the honour of tattooing the wedding rings on so they’d both have something permanent that Sophia wouldn’t have to take off.
“You may kiss the bride,” said the registrar, and so Rocco did, his lips finding Sophia’s, kissing her firmly, before sweeping her up in his arms and swinging her around.
Whoops of encouragement came from Art and Kane in the audience.
They left the registry office amid a hail of rice and caught a black cab the rest of the way to the pub where the gathering was being held. The pub was putting on a buffet for them, with a number of Sophia’s favourites specially made for her diet. She insisted on a lobster terrain and duck confit to remind them of their first date when they’d been reunited. Everyone tucked in, enjoying the food and toasting the happiness of the newlyweds.
Sophia nursed a glass of champagne, though she’d barely taken a sip yet. She didn’t need alcohol right now. Her happiness was like a ball of joy swelling in her chest, and she couldn’t stop herself staring up at Rocco, amazed that the boy from her childhood was now her husband.
“I can’t believe how incredibly lucky I am,” he told her, pulling her into his arms and nuzzling her neck.
She gave a sigh of happiness. “I’m the lucky one. I never imagined this would happen for me. It all feels like a dream.”
Rocco’s friends from the shop beckoned him to the bar, and she let her new husband go, but not before giving him another kiss. She’d barely had the chance to speak to anyone else and didn’t want to be rude to her guests. There would be plenty of time for fawning over her husband later.
She realised someone was missing.
“Where’s Mum?” she asked her father, who was sitting at one of the small round tables.
“She got a phone call and went outside to take it.”
“Oh, right. Is everything okay?”
“Yes, I think so.” His gaze drifted over her shoulder. “Here she is now.”
Sophia turned to see her mother pushing her way back through the pub. Right away, she could see something had happened. Her mother’s eyes were glossed with tears, her expression strained. The conversation around them died away as others picked up that something was happening. An arm slipped around Sophia’s waist, and she glanced up to see Rocco—her new husband—frowning down at her.
“What’s going on?”
“I’m not sure.”
Her mother came to a halt in front of them. “Sophia, that was the hospital on the phone. They’ve been trying to get hold of you, but I told them you were getting married and didn’t have your phone. I hate to break up your party, but I’m afraid you’re going to have to spend you first night as a married woman in hospital.”
Her stomach turned in a lurch. “What?”
Her mother’s eyes filled with fresh tears, and she placed the back of her hand to her mouth, her lips pressed together to contain her emotion. “They found a matc
h for you, sweetheart. You’re getting a new kidney.”
She could barely believe it was happening. Was she hearing things right? She glanced up at Rocco whose eyes had also glassed over. “But it’s too soon,” she blurted. “I should have to wait longer, right?”
“No, the board say you’re the best match for it. With your age and health, they think you’ll give this kidney the best chance of survival. That’ll you’ll be the one who’ll get the longest use out of it.”
“Oh, my God.” It finally sank in. She was getting her kidney.
Rocco pulled her into his arms and hugged her tight.
THE NEXT FEW HOURS were a blur of activity. She had to leave the party and go straight to the hospital.
Linda chuckled at her as she spotted her hurrying down the corridor, hand in hand with Rocco, both of them still in their wedding attire.
“I bet you’re the first person they’ve ever done a transplant on who arrived in her wedding dress,” the nurse said.
Sophia looked down at all the white. “I hope they’re going to let me change first.”
“I should think so, yes. I don’t think white lace is normally encouraged in a surgical setting. And congratulations to you both. You make a beautiful couple.”
“Thanks, Linda.”
“I hope all goes well, and we won’t need to see you back in dialysis any time soon.”
Sophia hugged the other woman and kept going. There was an atmosphere of excited anticipation around her, and she tried to fight down the nerves churning in her stomach. This was a massive opportunity for her, but it was also a surgery, and there was always the possibility that things could go wrong. She also knew that her getting a kidney meant there was a family who’d lost a loved one today and would be suffering the worst kind of grief, so while she was overjoyed to be getting this chance, the joy was muffled by fear, and compassion for her donor’s family.
Forged with Ink (London Inked Boys Book 3) Page 8