Undoubtedly.
The realization was both exhilarating and terrifying. It wasn’t even that I wanted him to be mine, but he truly felt like mine. If Ellie wanted nothing more to do with me—and as God awful as it’d be to lose just her—I would lose him too. It was a strange feeling, for someone to feel like they belonged to you even though they didn’t.
“Excuse me,” I mumbled, carrying Andy toward the kitchen where my mom and Ellie should be nearly done. I stopped right before I rounded the corner when I heard my mother’s soft voice.
“What worries you, Ellie?” she asked. I imagined my girlfriend biting her lip, struggling with revealing something so personal to a virtual stranger.
“I can’t change the world and make everyone else accept him, can I?” She sounded dejected, her voice getting softer, and I had to shuffle closer to the wall so I could continue to listen.
“No, you can’t. And as a parent, nothing hurts like not being able to shield your child from the world’s ugliness. But experiencing that is also a part of life. It’s unavoidable. You did. Grayson did. And unfortunately Andy will, too.” I held him tighter, as if I could reject her words, before peeking around the corner. I watched my mom gently grab Ellie’s shoulders.
“The problem is you’ve both been waiting for other people, whether it’s society or your family, to tell you it’s okay to be who you are. And maybe you’re looking for that validation from people you know will never give it to you, because you feel you’re not enough. You don’t want to be accepted.”
My brows furrowed as Ellie frowned and said, “That makes no sense.”
“Exactly,” she said with a patient smile, letting go of her shoulders. Ellie’s gaze went to the ground as she worried her bottom lip, thinking over my mom’s words. She went still and as if she felt me standing there, her head slowly turned my way.
Our eyes met and I froze, hoping she wouldn’t be mad at me. I’d purposefully eavesdropped, there was no other explanation for it, and I wasn’t going to insult her by offering her one.
Thankfully she smiled and walked toward me. “Hey, there.”
“Hi. You okay?” I asked.
“Yeah. Your mom’s given me a lot to think about.”
“She usually does,” I said with a grin. Out of the corner of my eyes, I saw my mom walking toward us as she dried her hands on a dishrag. When her movement slowed, I looked toward her and found her eyes on Andy.
“Is that…?” She trailed off as she pointed to the lion, half of its ear in his mouth.
“Yeah, it is,” Ellie said. “It’s his favorite toy.”
My mom had tears in her eyes, but she quickly shook her head. “Look at me, getting all emotional. Are you ready for dessert?”
Looking at the clock, I saw it was just shy of nine. “Actually, could we get it to go? I don’t want to keep waking him up,” I said as I stroked his head.
Ellie straightened and her eyes nervously shifted between us. “We can stay. I don’t want to ruin—”
I cut her off by resting one of my fingers against her lips. “You ruin nothing, Ellie.” Her lips tightened beneath my finger.
“I’d actually be grateful if you took him off my hands,” my mom said.
“Thanks.” My tone was dry, but somehow it made both women smile wider.
Just then one of Stephanie’s sons came running in, screaming. His brother was close behind, chasing him with a stuffed toy in his hand. “ARGGGG. I’m gonna get you.”
My gaze moved to Ellie, waiting for her to recognize the toy she gave me almost eight months ago. Her wide eyes flew to mine as they zipped by her and ran back into the family room.
“Was that…?”
“The mouse you knitted? Yep.”
She chuckled, her eyes growing wet, and shook her head. “What the heck?”
“I told you I was going to give it to them. I shipped it to Stephanie months ago.”
“You made that?” my mom asked excitedly. Ellie’s confused eyes shifted between us.
“I did, but… I messed it up. It was worthless.”
“Nonsense. My grandsons love it. They call it The Demon.” We all chuckled as the noises in the other room got louder. My mother’s expression grew somber. “Nothing’s useless, Ellie. It’s just not in its rightful place.” She squeezed Ellie’s shoulders. “That goes for people, too.”
My girlfriend swallowed roughly as she nodded. “I’m starting to see that.”
“Now, let me wrap up the dessert so you guys can go.” She shuffled toward the fridge. “Grayson has a bit of a sweet tooth. He rarely allows himself to indulge, but red velvet with cream cheese frosting is his favorite.”
Ellie tried to keep up with my mom’s rapid change in topics. “Oh. I had one at Christmas. They were delicious.”
“Thank you.” My mother beamed.
I smiled as my family’s laughter rang from the other room. Andy was in my arms, and I pulled Ellie into my side.
It was the best birthday I’d ever had.
Later that night, after Andy was in bed, Ellie and I were sitting on my couch. The birthday presents from my family were on the table in front of us, untouched. They knew how awkward I felt opening gifts in front of other people so I always unwrapped them alone.
This year I was going to open them with Ellie. A lot of things had changed this birthday.
Ellie had haphazardly stuck the candle through the frosting and when she lit it, I found I didn’t even care that it was lopsided. Then, for the first time in years, I made a wish.
Please let me keep them.
We were finishing off one of the four cupcakes my mom had given us, when my eyes moved to the clock, seeing it was a few minutes past midnight. Turning back to Ellie, I grabbed her hand and laced our fingers.
“We’ve known each other for exactly one year.”
Her eyes widened. “Really?”
“Yes. We met today, March 7.”
“You remember the day we met?” she asked, disbelief coloring her tone. Not like she thought I was lying, but she was still adjusting to the idea that she could be the center of someone’s universe.
Nodding, I tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “But in the spirit of full disclosure, since it was the day after my birthday it wasn’t too hard to remember.”
She shuffled closer, her smile not dimming, as she ate the last of the cake. A bit of frosting was left behind on her lip. Without a word, I leaned forward and swiped my tongue until it was gone.
“What did you do last year? If you weren’t talking to them?” she asked once our lips separated. My eyes ran over her face, wondering if I should tell her the truth. I didn’t consider long—I’d always tell her the truth.
“I worked.” Looking toward the counter in the kitchen, I nodded my head and said, “And then I sat there and ate my cupcake. Alone.”
Ellie’s hand cupped my cheek, turning my head back to her. She was frowning with tears in her eyes. I grabbed her wrist and kissed her palm.
“Don’t feel sorry for me. If anything that should show you just how much of an impact you’ve had on my life. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
I pulled her to me as her tears fell. Then I kissed her, running my tongue over every inch of her mouth, tasting red velvet and a sweetness that only came from Ellie. Her salty tears ran between our lips, but they merely heightened my happiness because I knew they came from overwhelming love. After a few minutes, she leaned back with a goofy grin on her face. “Let’s go to bed.” I grabbed her hand and pulled her back for one more kiss.
It was a simple kiss. No tongue, just one soft sweep of my lips against hers.
It wasn’t the kind of kiss that should have my blood boiling. It shouldn’t make me lose my mind or instantly crave more. But that was exactly what it did.
I later realized it wasn’t the kiss itself. It could have been just her breath hitting my lips, no contact at all, and I’d constantly be craving more.
It was Ellie. And I’d always want more.
I WOKE UP DISORIENTED. I recognized the soft cries that sounded to my left, but I was unfamiliar with everything else. The dark gray walls, the black satin sheets, the hairy leg I’d just kicked…
Awareness flooded me as I rolled over and saw Grayson lying next to me. I was still getting used to waking here even though I’d spent almost every night here for the past two weeks. Naomi and Damien were enjoying the continued alone time and as much as I was afraid to admit it, Grayson’s house felt as synonymous with home as my brother’s.
He was still asleep, so I quickly reached over and muted the baby monitor before Andy woke him. Silence blanketed the room as I carefully crawled out of bed, leaving Grayson to sleep.
Andy was low maintenance this morning. After a quick bottle and burping him, I put him back in his crib. I could have crawled back into bed as well, but seeing as it was almost seven o’clock, I decided to stay up and make breakfast for Grayson for once.
And that was where he found me when he woke up fifteen minutes later. I was standing at the counter and cutting up a pineapple, when I felt his palms land on my waist. They effortlessly slid around and pulled me back into his strong, warm body. We were both still wearing what we went to bed in.
Him: Drawstring pants and a fitted T-shirt.
Me: Thigh-high socks and a loose T-shirt.
“Morning,” I whispered. He didn’t respond as he peppered soft kisses down my neck. My hair was pulled up into a loose bun on the top of my head, giving him easy access. Knuckles gripping the counter, I closed my eyes when his hand slipped underneath my shirt. Grayson’s hand was so large it spanned my entire stomach, his pinky flirting with the edge of my boy-short panties while his thumb brushed the underside of my boob.
I was torn between wanting his hand to go higher and lower. It was amazing how quickly he could turn me on, almost without even trying. I rejoiced when his hand shifted lower, only to groan when it landed on my thigh and slowly slid down toward the end of my sock. His other palm fell to the opposite leg, mirroring its movements.
Grayson’s lips hovered by my ear. “Do you know how many times I fantasized about you?” he asked, low and tortured. I quickly shook my head, waiting for what he’d do next.
“Hmmm, so you probably aren’t aware…” He trailed off, his fingers teasing the top of my thigh-highs, slipping under and stroking the skin.
“A-aware of what?” I managed to get out. My head was pitched forward, eyes on the abandoned knife and fruit. His lips moved to my cheek, and I felt him smile against my skin before he placed a gentle kiss there. Then he slowly dragged his mouth toward my ear before answering.
“How many times I saw you in these socks”—he paused while his fingers, still underneath the material, skirted around my leg until he was stroking the skin on the back of my thighs—“and wanted to drop to my knees? To bury my face between your legs while you wore nothing else?”
My breath hitched.
No. I had definitely not been aware of that.
He gripped the end of my T-shirt and waited. I didn’t have to look at him to know he was asking for permission. I quickly nodded and helped him remove it, feeling the bite of the cool air as it met my skin. The shirt floated to the ground and I stood before Grayson in only my thigh-highs and boy shorts. His fingers ghosted over my back, exploring.
After a few minutes he removed his hands, but I didn’t have to mourn the loss for long before he grabbed my hips, pulling me even further away from the island. I shuffled back, hitting the opposite counter, when he said, “Hold on.”
Taking a deep breath, I gripped the edge and waited. When he got on his knees, mine almost buckled at the look he was giving me. His eyes flared as he stared up at my naked breasts. I personally never thought my A-cup boobs were much to fawn over. Except for being pregnant, I had been thin my entire life. Some even called me gangly. Having a child didn’t change that. Three months after I gave birth I returned to my former size, plus a few stretch marks.
I’d be lying if I said standing nearly naked in front of Grayson like this didn’t make me nervous. Of course he’d seen me already, quite a few times. Never in the daylight though, where every flaw was highlighted.
But the second I saw the look in his eyes, that fear dissolved and arousal took its place. He was looking at me like I was perfect.
He smirked at the expression on my face—undisguised lust—before shuffling forward, still on his knees. The smile fell and his hands rose until he was stroking the skin above my panties. Leaning in, he kissed one of my faded stretch marks.
“You’re not embarrassed, are you?” he asked, gently tracing the pale pink line. I could tell he wasn’t asking because he thought I should be.
“No,” I whispered, one of my hands leaving the counter to run through his hair. “I don’t regret anything having to do with Andy. I’d proudly wear stretch marks all over my face if it meant I had him.”
Grayson smiled up at me. “And you’d still be beautiful.” I felt my blush all the way to my toes. It turned into an entirely different kind of flush when his hands moved lower. My breath caught and my heart hammered as they slid around and down, until he was cupping my butt beneath my underwear.
I whimpered, my hand tightening in his hair, when his fingers dug into my skin. His patience was fading as he dragged my panties down my legs and flung them behind him, leaving me in only my baby pink thigh-highs.
With ease, he lifted my leg and hooked it over his shoulder, and started eating me out like he’d been doing it for years. There was nothing slow about it, and the immediate pressure had my back arching and my legs shaking.
“Oh God,” I moaned. My fingers twisted, tugging on his hair, until my legs gave out and I fell back on my elbows. There was a bit of pain at the contact, but I didn’t care.
“Are you okay?”
“Don’t stop,” I panted as I tightened my legs around him. He laughed even as his eyes flared with desire, and then I couldn’t think about anything else when he put his mouth back on me.
The closer I got to my orgasm, the less I cared… about anything. I shamelessly ground down on his face. Embarrassment might have touched me, even in my blissed-out state, if not for the way his eyes heated and his fingers dug deeper into my skin, pulling me closer.
He seemed to want as little space between us as possible, and I didn’t disagree.
“G-Grayson…”
At the sound of his name, he groaned against me, sending delicious vibrations through me. One of his hands fell to my bare thigh, shifting lower until his fingers flirted with the edge of my socks.
“I’m close,” I mumbled, just as he swirled his tongue around my clit before sucking… hard. I cried out, wave after delicious wave rolling over me. He was relentless, wringing out as much of my pleasure as he could. “Oh God, I c-can’t…” I whimpered.
Grayson finally slowed. My eyes fell shut and I tipped my head back, a sated smile on my face. He stood up, pressing kisses against my skin as he went, until his mouth met mine.
After a few drugging kisses, he pulled away and whispered, “Morning.”
“You know, for someone who…” I stumbled over my words. Quickly clearing my throat, I finished, “… has never done that before, you were pretty good at it.”
His hand slid around my neck, kneading the back of it. “I love to study. And guess what my new favorite subject is? You.” I shivered as he kissed my cheek.
“Your pleasure.” Another kiss to the corner of my mouth. The smile that spread across my lips quickly dropped when his hand found its way between my legs.
“Your moans,” he said, eliciting that very thing. “Your—”
He cut himself off when Andy started crying. Grayson chuckled. “At least he was considerate enough to wait until I’d finished.”
Shaking my head with a laugh, I pushed him back, quickly grabbing my discarded clothes and pulling them back on.
Grayson walked by, he
ading toward the fridge, and paused to squeeze my hip. “Why don’t you grab him while I finish breakfast?”
I frowned, looking back at the discarded cutting board. “It was my turn to feed you.”
“You did, and it was the best meal I’ve ever had.”
I rolled my eyes and turned around. “I walked right into that one.”
He grinned. “You sure did.”
Andy’s screams grew louder, and I pulled away.
“Hurry back,” he called as I walked down the hallway with the goofiest grin on my face.
Everything was perfect.
Until it wasn’t…
“All units, we have a ten-thirty-one in progress, commercial burglary at 9620 E. Monroe.”
My hand was already reaching for the sirens when my partner said, “That’s only two blocks from here.”
Nodding, I began weaving in and out of traffic as Brody responded to the dispatcher, telling her we were on our way. We were there in minutes, hopping out of the car and approaching the drugstore with our guns drawn.
“HURRY!”
Our backs were flush against the walls outside the door. I peeked around the corner and assessed the scene.
Two perps. One had a handgun pointed at the cashier, who was crying as she shoved the cash into a sack. The gunman’s arm was shaking, and I’d bet anything that upon closer inspection I’d find several more signs of a junkie. His partner was equally jumpy. He had a gun pointed at an older couple huddled against the back wall. Leaning in just a bit, I looked at the large security mirror in the corner and noted there was no one else in the store.
My back hit the wall again as I looked at Brody. I quickly relayed what I knew: the number of perpetrators, number of hostages, and what they were carrying.
With a quick nod, we entered, guns raised at each perp.
“Police! Freeze!” Brody shouted.
“Drop your weapons,” I calmly instructed, my eyes dead set on the gunman aiming at the couple. Now that I was closer and looking longer than a couple seconds, I could see he was shaking badly. There were sores on his arms and panic in his eyes.
Unveiling Fate Page 24
