Real Vampires Know Hips Happen

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Real Vampires Know Hips Happen Page 4

by Gerry Bartlett

teeth were gritted, his fangs down. I swear he was ready to rip her throat open.

  "No, I don't! Or at least not back then. You didn't love me. You tumbled me in your father's hayloft and then went on your merry way to take advantage of the next besotted girl. I was nothing to you. Why should I give you a child after that? Mac adored me. He would do whatever I wanted, give me the world. You hied off to London soon after you got your fangs and then brought home this twopenny whore, embarrassing your parents and - " Mara gasped when he threw her back into her chair.

  "I have never wasted my blunt on whores, woman. And I don't tolerate liars. I'm beginning to think this knife attack may have been your idea. That there was no witch. Where did you get the poison that jumbled my mind and where can we find the cure?" Jerry glared down at her.

  "Step away from her, Campbell. " A man that I assumed was Davy McLeod strode into the room and grabbed Jerry by the shoulders. He practically threw him at me and I was happy to catch him. Jerry was out of my arms in a blink, though, obviously eager for a fight.

  "Careful, McLeod. I'm in a temper and beating you to a bloody pulp would go a long way toward satisfying my urge for action," Jerry snarled, his fists up and a wicked gleam in his eyes.

  "What the hell's going on here? Mara, love?" Davy ignored the taunt and scooped Mara up to hold her in his arms.

  "It was awful, Davy. I, I attacked Jeremiah. But it wasn't my fault. I was under a witch's spell. You've got to believe me. " She looked up at him with tears running down her cheeks. Damn, how could she look so beautiful while crying?

  "Of course I believe you. Why would you need to lie about something like that?" Davy gave Jerry a hard look. "Touch her again, Campbell, and I'll end you. "

  "You could try. " Jerry was obviously still eager for a fight.

  "That's enough. I hear my men returning. Let's see what they found outside. " Angus stepped between them and we all turned toward the door. Several burly men in Campbell plaid crowded into the room. They brought with them the smell of damp wool and cold air.

  "No sign of a witch or a MacDonald, Laird. I've sent some men into the village to search further," the obvious head of the group reported. He nodded at Jerry. "Glad to see you on your feet, Jeremiah. "

  "Aye, I'm on my feet, but seems I've lost my mind, Fergus. What year is it?" Jerry turned his back on Mara and her fiance.

  "Twenty thirteen. Did the lass's blood not cure you?" Fergus nodded to me. "Welcome, Gloriana. It's been too long. "

  "Fergus. I hope Maeve is well. " I recognized Jerry's cousin and remembered his wife as a friend here. Another Campbell. Would this friendly greeting help my lover realize I did have a place in his life?

  "She's tip-top. Started a business online. I'll have to give you her card. Makes some mighty fine jewelry. Celtic. You'd like it, I think. Maybe could sell a bit in your shop. " He turned when Jerry punched his shoulder. "What?" He rubbed the spot. "I'm sorry I didn't find the witch but that's a bit harsh, don't you think?"

  "Stop yer blatherin'. Twenty thirteen? You mean two thousand and thirteen, man? The year is two thousand and thirteen?" Jerry swayed and the laird and Fergus both jumped to catch him. He threw off their hands and pulled himself together with a shake of his head.

  "Lad, sit. Gloriana, give him your wrist again. He's light-headed. Or maybe I should call for some synthetic. " Angus shoved everyone aside until he had Jerry in his leather recliner, then forcibly pushed the seat back. "Now, listen to me, boy. You were stuck with a potion that's given you amnesia of a sort. Take it easy. Let us care for you. "

  "Da, I can't believe I've lost over four hundred years of my life. " Jerry gazed up at his father. "Nothing looks right except you, Fergus and those two. " He gestured toward where Mara was trying to tug Davy out of the room. "Stay. I want to hear about my daughter. You owe me that, I think. "

  She cleared her throat. "Yes, I suppose I do. She's beautiful, Jeremiah. But willful. As long as Mac was alive, I didn't worry too much about her because she ever wanted him proud of her. But she's led a dangerous lifestyle since then, kept bad company. You were helping control her in Austin. She'd moved in with you. "

  "Austin?" Jerry closed his eyes and rubbed his temples. "Where the hell is that?"

  "It's where we live, Jer. In Texas. " I realized he had lost the years that even included the formation of the States. "Um, in the New World. "

  "What the hell was I doing in that wilderness?" He opened his eyes and stared at me. "We lived together there? Were we married?"

  "No. We didn't even live in the same house. The New World's not a wilderness now. It's a prosperous country and we lived in a large city there. " I moved close to him. If he wanted to drink my blood again, I was all for it.

  "So we never married. Yet you claim we were together for four hundred years?" He ignored my outstretched hand. "You were my mistress?"

  "I suppose you could call me that. " I frowned, not liking that term at all. "If you need blood, take mine again. Maybe it will help you remember things. "

  "It didn't before. " He jumped and looked down at his sporran, the man purse he wore over his kilt. "What the hell? There's something in my pouch. " He clapped a hand over it. "Did you stuff a beastie in there, Mara? Is this another trick?"

  I grinned and flipped open the flap. I knew what was happening. "It's your cell phone, Jerry, set to vibrate. " Sure enough, his cell was lit up. I punched a button and held it to my ear.

  "Hello. This is Gloriana, for Jeremy Blade. "

  "I'm looking for Blade. This is Adams, his manager in Miami. We've got an emergency and I need a quick decision. "

  I glanced at Jerry. He was frowning at me and the phone at my ear, clearly a mystery to him. "Look, I'm sorry, Adams, but Blade has been in an accident. He's not in any shape to talk to you about business. You'll have to take care of things yourself. Can you handle it?"

  "You sure he can't come to the phone? Talk to me for just a minute?" The man was clearly horrified.

  "Positive. Make the right decision and I'm sure he'll reward you. What do you think?"

  "If you're sure he's not available. Seriously, he's always available. " Adams obviously doubted me but had no choice but to take my word.

  "Not this time. He hires only the best, so make the decision yourself. " I skipped out of reach when Jerry tried to take the phone then ended the call.

  "What the hell are you talking into?" Jerry grabbed the phone out of my hands to study it.

  "It's a cell phone. " I wanted to cry as he turned it over in his hands, obviously at a loss to know how to even turn it on. I pulled mine out of my skirt pocket. "Here's mine. You gave me the cover for it. "

  "Now that's just ridiculous. " He shook his head over the pink crystal case. "What does it do?" He put his black phone to his ear and frowned. "You were talking to someone. Who?"

  I had to clear my throat to speak. "Your manager in Florida, that's another state in the New World. You have businesses all over the United States, that's what the New World is called now. You go by the name Jeremy Blade over there. I'm sure you can trust him to take care of things until you can handle them yourself again. " I smiled when Jerry grumbled about black magic, shook the phone then put it to his ear again.

  "Son, don't worry about business or these newfangled gadgets. " Angus took the phone out of Jerry's hand. "Relax, drink some blood. Get your strength back and I'm sure your mind will come back along with it. " He gave me a searching look. "Gloriana, perhaps you could give him some time with Mara. To ask about his daughter. "

  "Oh, sure. " I realized Angus had a glass of synthetic in his hand which he gave Jerry. I was getting the bum's rush. "You want me to get a room in the village? Or I can sleep in my car again. "

  "Now, don't get your feathers ruffled, lass. Just give them a little time. " Angus eased me to the door. "You have luggage? I'll have a lad bring it in. You are welcome to stay here as long as you wish. You can even sleep with Jeremiah
if he'll let you. Give Fergus your car keys. "

  "It's a rental. I'd like to return it if I'm staying awhile. To Edinburgh. But I guess. . . " I didn't know how to proceed. Jerry didn't know me. Angus was sending mixed signals. He was offering hospitality but the attempt on Jerry's life had arrived with me. I could read that suspicion in his mind. "Well,

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