by Trinity Ford
I hope this letter finds you well. I made it to Fort Worth and settled in here, working as a midwife and nursing assistant to the local doctor. My training has served me well, as Fort Worth has a section of town where injuries are common and my knowledge is needed.
Mother, I’ve met a man—a sheriff—and while I didn’t come here for that reason, I couldn’t help but fall in love with him. It’s wrong, I know. I have asked for God’s guidance and forgiveness, but the only answer I keep coming back to is that God wouldn’t want me to live a life of fear and abuse with an ungodly man. The man I love is a church-going, God-fearing man whose soul is as kind and gentle as a dove.
I wanted you to know that I’m going to initiate divorce proceedings with Henry so that I may be clear to live the life I was meant to live. Someday, I hope you can come visit and see how different life is for me now. Fort Worth has a wonderful community, and they’ve all taken me in like their family.
All my love,
Millie
Frances cried happy tears as she read of her daughter’s good fortune. She imagined her smiling daily, her porcelain skin free of black and blue marks, her spirit free to soar as her own never had.
But the voices of Henry and Raymond brought her back to reality. Two men, intent on destroying her daughter’s happiness, were planning their efforts in the other room.
“I’m heading out first thing tomorrow,” Henry said. “Don’t want to give your missus, there, a chance to tell Millie I’m coming.
“Need me to come along?” Raymond asked.
“Nah,” Henry said. “This will be more fun if it’s just me and her.” The two men laughed and Frances laid in bed, trying to think of a way to warn Millie. But there was no way to get a message to her in such a short time—and even if there was, she was sure Raymond would have a tight watch on her to make sure she didn’t reveal their plans.
She fell asleep in mid-prayer, after hours of feeling the tears roll down the side of her cheeks, lost in hopelessness and fear of what was to come.
Chapter Twelve
The days and weeks after Millie mailed the letter off to her mother, she felt lighter. Her heart was relieved to finally be on a path to freedom. If she could somehow get back to Kansas and get a divorce from Henry, she may not even have to reveal her sordid past to her new family and friends in Fort Worth—especially John.
John had backed off with the serious declarations of love, giving her space to enjoy his company without having to push him away. She could see in his eyes how much he adored her—something she’d never seen in Henry’s eyes. She constantly caught him looking at her, his mouth breaking out in a grin every single time.
Her mother should have received her letter a week or two ago, and she had formulated a plan to use her stipend of money to head back to Kansas and file for a divorce from Henry. She’d have to have an excuse to go, so she would tell everyone her mother needed her.
“Ready for tonight’s races?” Clara asked, as Millie emerged from her bedroom for breakfast. “It’s a really good time, even for the Acre.”
“I can’t wait!” Millie said. The Acre was usually the place of immoral activities like drinking, gambling and ladies of the night, but tonight, the whole town of Fort Worth came together to celebrate the anniversary of the Fort’s creation. The townsfolk celebrated with a big barbeque potluck dinner and a variety of races, including carriages, horses, pigs, dogs, rabbits, foot races for the kids before bedtime, and even men in sack races and racing on their hands while someone carried their legs like a wheelbarrow.
It was sure to be fun, but it was still the Acre—and there would be some drinking, and a mix of civilized citizens with rowdy cowboys, so anything could happen. Millie was going with John, off duty. But she always carried her medical kit, just as he always had his six-shooter and badge, because in their line of work, you were never truly off duty. Doc had volunteered to do most of the work, and the new marshal had gotten stuck with the task of keeping things in check so that the sheriff and Millie could enjoy the event.
Main Street was blocked off for the event, all the way from the Trinity River to the courthouse. John arrived at the Springers’ just as Clara and Doc were heading into town. “She’s right inside,” Clara said to John, smiling at the bouquet of freshly picked flowers he held in his hand.
“Thank you, Ma’am,” he said, tipping his hat as he walked up to the porch. Millie suddenly opened the door before he had a chance to knock. She held Clara’s casserole in her hand, hoping to catch them before it was too late. Millie startled when she saw John, her breath catching at how handsome he looked. “These are for you,” he said, holding out the bouquet and laughing about her hands being full.
“I have a casserole,” she blurted out, caught off guard by the feelings stirred in her and the realization that someday soon, she would be free to spend the rest of her life with this wonderful man.
“Here, I’ll trade you,” John offered, handing her the bouquet as he took the casserole dish out of her hands. Millie’s cheeks flushed.
“They’re beautiful, John,” she said, inhaling the fragrance of the prairie blooms. “Let me put them in some water and then we’ll go.”
Millie felt John’s eyes on her as she walked into the kitchen. She was wearing a new outfit she’d bought just for the occasion. The lavender dress with white lace fitted her frame perfectly. She had even invested in a matching hat, enjoying the opportunity to dress up, for once.
As she walked back toward the door, Millie noticed John’s serious look. She stopped in her tracks, holding her breath, scared that he was about to tell her something she didn’t want to hear. Their eyes met and silence filled the room momentarily as both were lost in their own thoughts. “I didn’t think I’d ever feel this way again,” John said softly. “You’re beautiful, Millie.”
Millie breathed out and smiled, bowing her head like a shy schoolgirl. “I didn’t think I’d ever feel this way at all,” she replied, stepping past him out the door quickly, to avoid anything deeper before she was able to take care of things back in Kansas.
As they approached town, bonfires glowed from a distance. Millie breathed in the warm, summer air and noticed how peaceful she felt ever since she’d made a decision to confront her past and unchain herself from the binds of Henry Wallace. She felt reborn—strong and unafraid—almost as if she’d suddenly been freed from a life of blindness and could now see how things were supposed to be.
As they left the carriage and walked up the road to the festivities, Millie marveled at how wonderful it was to see all of her friends from church mingled with those she routinely treated in Hell’s Half Acre. It was one big community, filled with laughter and camaraderie. She saw a saloon owner talking and laughing with Pastor Littlejohn, trail drivers nodding hello to local shopkeepers, and the children of both sides of town running and playing with each other—all labels removed for a single night of celebration.
Everyone greeted Millie and John with respect and admiration. They had no enemies here, and because of their jobs, they were known and well-liked by all. Two little boys ran up to John and tugged at his trousers. “Can we have a badge?” they said in unison. John always kept extra badges that he’d made out of tin to hand out to kids, so he reached into his vest and pulled two of them out.
“Now, I can only give you this is if you promise to go catch the bad guys,” he said with a serious smile. The two nodded, took the badges in hand and ran off looking for their parents to show them what they’d gotten.
Millie stood smiling at John, but her heart broke inside thinking of what a wonderful father he would have made if he’d gotten to see Grace and Anna grow up. She still hadn’t told him she couldn’t have a child.
They walked up to the sack races and everyone urged John to grab a sack. He laughed and shook his head no. “Oh, please, John,” Millie teased. “Do it for me!”
John smiled and grabbed a sack as the crowd of onlookers cheered him on. The announcer asked
for others to compete against the sheriff, so Samuel Radcliff and a few others walked up and jumped in line, too. Millie stood beside Samuel’s wife, Hannah, whose premature baby she had helped deliver not long ago. “He’s like a big kid,” Hannah laughed, turning to greet Millie at the event.
“Oh, she’s beautiful,” Millie said, peeking at Hannah’s baby, swaddled in the blanket. “May I?” she gestured, wanting to hold the little bundle of joy.
“Of course!” Hannah said. “She wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for you.” Hannah handed over the baby to Millie.
“What’d you name her?” Millie asked.
“Elisabeth,” she replied. “After my ma.”
Millie stood there looking into the eyes of the sleepy newborn. For the first time ever, she ached to have a child. Before, when it was just Henry in her life, she couldn’t imagine being a mother. But now, it was going to hurt knowing she could have the family she’d always wanted with John, if only her body would allow it.
“And we’re off!” the announcer said, shooting his gun into the air. The baby startled and began crying, so Millie handed her back to Hannah, so that she could be soothed back to sleep. John and Samuel were neck and neck toward the finish line, when a small piglet that had gotten loose ran out into the street in front of the men. Both Samuel and John stopped suddenly to avoid it, causing a big-pile up of all the sack racers, crumpled in the middle of Main Street. The whole crowd, along with the participants, laughed loudly, and the announcer called the winner. “Ham Hock wins by a snout!” Everyone cheered for the piglet, and the kids ran around trying to catch it.
“Well, I tried,” John said, dusting off his clothes as he walked back to Millie with a smile on his face.
“You planned that, didn’t you?” Samuel teased John as he walked up to Hannah and kissed the baby’s forehead, and then his wife.
“I’ll never tell!” John laughed.
“We need to find Jenny, who’s running around here somewhere, and get this baby home,” Samuel said. “We’ll see y’all Sunday at church!” Everyone waved goodbye as Samuel and Hannah walked back toward their carriage with baby Elisabeth.
“Man, it sure is good to see him on the right path,” John said to Millie.
“Was he not on it before?” she asked.
“He went through a real tough time when his fiancée married someone else,” John explained. “Found him drunker than a skunk in the Acre night after night, until Pastor Littlejohn stepped in and placed the Hearts and Hands ad. He was just sad, is all.”
Millie smiled, thinking about how Pastor Littlejohn’s plan was slowly changing peoples’ lives—Hannah’s, Samuel’s, John’s and her own. By the grace of God, she would have her happy ending, too—if she could get a legal divorce from Henry without him harming her first. She hated carrying this secret with her. “John?” she asked. “Is there somewhere we can talk…alone?”
“Come on,” John said. “I know just the place.” John walked Millie back to the carriage and they drove away from town, toward his cabin. He stopped at the top of a hill in the middle of the prairie. “I always come here to think.” It was the same place where they’d had their picnic—where John had confided in her about the tragedy in his past.
The black night sky was painted with twinkling stars and the soothing hum of the cicadas serenaded them in the moonlight. Still sitting in the carriage, Millie turned to face him. “John,” she said. “I can’t have a child.” The minute she said it, she wished she could take it back. After all, the two weren’t getting married—hadn’t even dated—but they both knew there were strong feelings between them, and she felt it wasn’t right not to tell him, in case he wanted to change his mind.
John stared back at Millie, the look on his face pained as if he were already having regrets. “Oh, Millie,” he said. “Is that what’s been eating you up all this time? Why, I don’t care about that. You should know that.” He put his arm around her shoulder and pulled her in close for a hug. Slowly backing away, he looked into Millie’s eyes. “I love you, Millie—everything about you. Nothing could change my mind about wanting to marry you.”
Millie’s heart filled with love and relief, knowing that John would still love her even though she couldn’t give him a child. He moved his head slowly toward hers, in an effort to kiss her, but Millie stopped him. “I can’t, John,” she said. “I still have something to take care of back home. I’m going to leave for Kansas in a couple of weeks, and then when I return, we can move forward. I promise.”
John looked at her face quizzically and then turned to look up at the sky. “I wish you trusted me,” he said solemnly.
“I do, John,” she said, turning his face back toward hers with her hand. “You have to trust me now.”
“Okay,” he answered in a pained voice. They sat in silence, staring up at the sky for a few minutes more. “Better get on home before it gets too late.”
Over the next several days, John seemed reserved, as if deep in thought about what Millie hadn’t told him. She wished she could speed up time and put the past behind her, but she had to plan carefully. She wanted to find a safe place to stay in Kansas while she petitioned for a divorce from Henry—somewhere he’d never find her. She’d gotten a reply back from a couple who owned a little shop in town. She had delivered their child for free when they fell on hard times. They were going to let her stay in the loft above the shop and keep it a secret for her. If only she could tell John of her plans and alleviate his concern…
Her train would leave a week from today. She’d told Clara and Doc that she’d be going back home to finish some business there, before returning to Fort Worth permanently. “Do you want us to come along?” Clara offered. “It might be dangerous. On those trains, I mean.”
Millie knew what Clara really meant. She’d seen the bruises on her when she first arrived. “I’ll be fine,” Millie reassured her. The couple didn’t press her for details, and she wouldn’t have told the truth anyway. Maybe someday. Maybe after she told John. But the whole situation was embarrassing—answering an ad as a married woman, fleeing an abusive husband. She’d rather just take care of it and move on with a clean slate.
Millie finished getting ready for the night’s shift as Clara went to wake Doc. She was going to tell John about her trip tonight—not the details, just the day she was leaving—and she had no idea how he would react to even more secrecy.
Chapter Thirteen
Henry Wallace had arrived in town late in the afternoon. He checked into the hotel and walked over to the saloon across the street, taking a seat at the bar. “Whisky,” he told the bartender, who served him promptly. The room was almost empty, except for a small group playing pool and an animal in a cage at the end of the bar. “That a real panther?” he asked, feeling like his eyes were playing tricks on him.
“Sure is,” the bartender said. “City council’s ‘bout to make us get rid of him due to the fact he’s always hurting people. Good attraction, though. Brings in business.”
“I can imagine,” Henry said. “Hey you know of any jobs here in Fort Worth—maybe something in law enforcement or medicine? I done a bit of both back in Kansas.” He wanted to dig for more information about Millie or her sheriff boyfriend—find out all he could before he confronted her and took her back home.
“Matter of fact we got a nurse here, come from Kansas,” the bartender replied. “Purty little thing—kind as can be—but she’s off limits on account of the sheriff being smitten with her. She’ll probably be ‘round here sometime tonight and you can ask her and the Doc ‘bout medical jobs, or talk to the sheriff ‘bout law enforcement. I reckon we need a marshal, since the last one got scared off.” The bartender filled up Henry’s whisky glass a second time, and then a third.
As Henry sat there tossing back liquor, the anger boiling up inside of him began oozing out. Who does she think she is, leaving me and coming here for another man? he thought. The bar began filling up as more cowboys came in off the trail to be
at the bad weather moving toward town.
Chapter Fourteen
John slowly got ready for a night in the Acre. He attached his badge and walked out to his horse for the ride into town, stopping at his favorite spot on top of the hill to watch the sun set. He hadn’t felt like himself lately. He was feeling impatient and hurt, struggling with the wait to marry Millie. What pained him most was wondering why she wouldn’t let him help her. If only she trusted him, he was sure he could fix whatever it was holding her back. Sure, they got to see each other daily at work, and spend time together at church activities—but it couldn’t compare to being able to hold her hand, wake up to her beautiful face, and proudly walk her on his arm into services each Sunday. That’s what he’d missed so much after Rose died—the presence of someone so fragile and precious to his heart that he would do anything to protect her.
But it just wasn’t meant to be yet. Pastor Littlejohn had counseled him on it already. “We must be patient in life,” he told John. “Romans 12:12 says to rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, and be constant in prayer.”
John tried to remind himself of that, but he was only human, and sometimes even his best efforts weren’t enough to fend off the pain of desperately wanting to be able to love and share his life with Millie.
A loud clap of thunder jolted him out of his thoughts and he noticed the dark wall of storms making their way toward Fort Worth from the west. He gave a quick click of his tongue, dug his heels gently into the sides of his horse, snapped the reins and shouted, “Let’s go!” as they raced toward town to take shelter before the downpour began.
Chapter Fifteen
Henry joined in on a game of pool, betting some of the cash he’d brought with him. He took his pool cue and leaned over the table to line up. Just as his cue hit the ball, the double doors swung open and Sheriff Lockhart strode in to get out of the rain. Henry’s skin felt like it was on fire, he was so mad. It was all he could do to not pull out his six-shooter and stick a bullet right between the sheriff’s eyes.
