by Loki Renard
In the faint light of the morning, Savage watched her sleep. When she was unconscious her frown faded and her expression became sweet. He let her lay on him, smiling to himself when she growled in her sleep, nuzzled under his arm and started drooling on his chest. Even unconscious she was a demanding little witch. It would have been easy to get comfortable, even fall back to sleep with her weight there a pleasant reminder that it wasn’t all shouting and misbehavior, but he couldn’t allow himself that luxury. “Don’t start playing happy families, Brett,” he muttered to himself.
Gently shifting over, he extracted himself from his sleeping bag and left Zora clutching his pillow fiercely. She barely stirred as he moved away and stoked the fire that had burned low in the grate all night long. He managed to put a pot of water on top of the wood burner and have it get close to boiling point before the activity woke her. As she emerged into consciousness she stirred and rolled over, groaning in protest.
“Morning,” he said pleasantly. “Want coffee?”
Zora sat up, rubbing her eyes. “Yes please,” she said in a surprisingly well mannered tone.
“Sugar? Milk?”
“Milk, no sugar thanks,” she said tiredly, pulling the bag up around herself as she sat cross legged on the platform. He was glad to see her sitting normally, her backside had taken considerable punishment of late. Though he was a believer in discipline, he didn’t like to leave a woman unable to sit unless it was really necessary. When the coffee was ready he handed her a cup of the brew and they sat together in the silence of the early morning, each lost in their own thoughts.
He was aware that she was watching him warily. Wondering, no doubt, what lay in store for her that day. Savage pondered that question himself. In spite of what he’d told her, the point of taking her up to the mountains wasn’t for physical training. The running they’d done the previous day had been designed largely to tire her out. No, the real reason he wanted this time with her was to establish some kind of bond that would mean she’d listen to him in the field. He could thrash her all he wanted, but if she ran off in the middle of a mission, it could get them all killed.
“Toast?”
“Sure,” Zora said, her tone laced with suspicion. Savage smiled and began preparing the toast by sticking bread on a skewer and holding it near the flames.
“I think its time you and I had a talk, Ms Matthews,” he said as he kept the bread balanced neatly on the knife edge between gently toasting and bursting into flames.
“About what?”
“About whatever you want to talk about,” he said. “You have questions, I’m sure.”
“You’ve already answered all my questions by beating me,” Zora bit out sarcastically. “Everything I needed to know, I learned from getting hit.”
“Zora,” his voice was patient and low. “I’m not going to fight with you. If you don’t want to talk, we can just go on another run.” He expertly slid the toast off the skewer and handed it to her on a tin plate. She took it with muttered thanks, the sulky expression stuck on her face.
“I thought you were going to hit me again today,” she said, picking at the toast.
“That depends on you actually,” he said, skewering another slice of bread.
“How’s that?”
“I’m hoping we can come to an understanding,” Savage glanced over at her. “We don’t know each other very well, but what we’re going to be doing in a few days, that requires the sort of trust that takes months or longer to build.”
“Well then we’re pretty fucked,” Zora muttered, pinching the toast together and stuffing it into her mouth. “Unless you can hit someone into trusting you,” she blurted messily around the half chewed wad of bread.
“Is the foul language really necessary?” He tried to keep the sharp tone out of his voice, but she was already testing his patience to its limits with her prickly attitude.
“No, but it makes me feel better.”
He gazed into the flames, trying to think of a way to defuse the situation and win her over. She was so damned contrary, in fact she was hell on wheels, but he couldn’t exactly blame her. If he’d been in her position he wouldn’t exactly be cooperative either. He’d been an idiot, he realized. Spanking her wasn’t getting the desired results, at least not the way he’d been going about it anyway. He could whip her backside until the cows came home and she’d remain truculent. Getting into a battles of wills with Zora Matthews was like getting into a battle of wills with a tank.
“How bad is it going to be?” Zora asked, breaking the silence and his train of thought.
He glanced at her. “Depends what you’re asking about.”
“This mission we’re going on,” she clarified, mumbling into her coffee cup.
Surprise swept through Savage. Maybe he was getting through to her after all. “Well, the way its planned at the moment it won’t be bad. This isn’t a matter of brute force, this is a matter of deactivating a system. Once we’ve done that, our job is over.”
Zora nodded. “So I just have to go into a room and do a few calculations? That’s it?”
Savage nodded. “That’s it.”
“You’ll be there, right?” The slight tremor in her voice belied the rough delivery. Underneath the bravado and the casual cussing he could see she was afraid.
He smiled at her reassuringly. “You won’t be out of my sight for a second. There’s an entire team backing you up.”
Her surprise was clear. “Really?”
“Oh yes,” he nodded. “I’ve got five of my best picked for this, Ms Matthews. You’re going to be very well protected.”
“This must be important,” she said softly, her brow furrowing as she cradled her cup in her hands.
“It is,” Savage confirmed. “Very. This is no small job we’re talking about here. This is a game changer. A great deal hinges on this success of the mission.”
“Like what?”
“Like the stability of Eastern Europe and potentially the world,” he said plainly. “We’re talking about a nuclear threat.”
“Nuclear?” She barked with the sudden laughter of surprise, not humor. “What the fuck? Nuclear threat? What the hell are you getting me into Savage? That shit is serious.”
“It is,” Savage agreed, doing his best to dismiss the torrent of foul language spilling between her lips.
“And you need someone like me to help you?” She shook her head. “You must really be desperate. Damn. I’ve been a pain, haven’t I?” The last part of her statement came as something of an afterthought and it caught Savage off guard, making him chuckle.
“You could say that,” he agreed honestly.
She sat there, shaking her head and muttering the word ‘nuclear’ in between a series of swear words. Savage watched her quickly, half expecting her to make a dash for the door. “Damn,” she repeated herself, looking at him with a new, open gaze. “Nuclear.”
“Yes,” he confirmed. “Nuclear.”
“Nuclear,” Zora shook her head again. “And I’m… you need me?”
“We do.” He kept his answers short, letting her come to terms with the news in her own epithet filled way.
“Wow. I’m sorry, sort of,” Zora said. “I mean, I’m not sorry for most of it, but I’m sorry for… I don’t know.” She blushed and stumbled over her words. “I don’t know,” she repeated herself. “Nothing I’m worried about seems to matter compared to some nuclear shit. That hurts people.”
Savage was impressed and almost shocked. For the first time, Zora was openly acknowledging that something mattered besides her own fairly insular concerns. He’d taken her for an entirely self centered brat, but perhaps she was just a brat.
“None of this has been easy for you.” he said, abandoning his toast on his plate. “It doesn’t have to be so hard though. You just need to do as you’re told.”
“I don’t know,” she frowned. “I don’t like the way you boss me around, or the way you treat me like a child, but I do want
to help.” Zora looked up at him, a frown on her face. “Do you know this is the first time you’ve bothered to have a proper conversation with me?”
She had a point, Savage had to concede inwardly. He’d been spending so much time trying to dominate her into submission he hadn’t bothered to actually converse with her. “I mean usually you just hit me and walk away,” she said reproachfully.
“That’s true,” he agreed. “Because I am treating you like I would treat one of my soldiers.”
Zora looked incredulous. “You spank your soldiers?”
“No,” he smiled wryly.
“I’m not a soldier,” Zora said. “I’m just a woman who can add a bit quicker than most. I don’t like being treated like I’m an awful person because I want to have a drink or speak my mind.”
“I’ve never thought you were an awful person,” he said quickly, frowning at the idea that was what she had taken away from their interaction.
“But that’s how you treat me. You gag me and shove soap in my mouth and hit me.” Her lower lip began to tremble slightly as she recounted the punishments which had clearly upset her more than she’d been letting on. “And you want to hit me with a switch today, whatever that is.”
“I’m sorry,” he said earnestly. “I’m used to dealing with people in a certain way. They do what I say, period. There’s no discussion, no room for consideration of feelings. You might not be a soldier, but I need to train you like one so that you can do what we need you to do.”
“But you’re not training me like a soldier. You just said that you don’t spank your soldiers,” Zora said, her face reflecting her confusion. “You’re treating me like I’m something you own, something that should never dare to disobey you.”
She was right. From the moment he’d carried her semi conscious body into the compound, Savage had been deeply possessive of her. He’d told himself it was because of the mission, because it was important that she learn to obey, but it had been more than that. Zora had challenged him from the moment she’d met him, she hadn’t been afraid of him even when he showed her that he was prepared to use force to make her do as she was told. He was quite taken with her, and though he’d told himself that he was enforcing some kind of discipline, he was enforcing more than discipline, he was enforcing his dominion over her.
“I’m an old fashioned man,” he said in heavy tones as he began to confess. “You don’t fall under the normal guidelines. All I had to do was get you to cooperate by any means necessary. I could have threatened you with endless jail time, I could have worn you down in other ways, but the moment I laid eyes on you I just wanted to spank you.”
“What?” Zora shook her head in disbelief. “Why?”
“Because,” he smiled at her. “You’re a brat. You’re a grown woman who behaves as if none of the usual rules apply to her.”
Zora shrugged, her features composed in a completely matter of fact poker face. “They don’t.”
Chapter Eight
“So you do believe you’re a law unto yourself.” Savage laughed at her brazen statement and sat back, leaning against the table with his arms folded across his broad chest. “How do you figure that, Ms Matthews?” His eyes crinkled at the corners with pure amusement as he waited for her to enlighten him.
It was Zora’s turn to sigh as she searched for an explanation that would make sense. “When you’re good at something, really good at something, it doesn’t matter what else you do, people will cut you slack. When I was a kid I could do what I wanted at school. One time I set a desk on fire because they wouldn’t let me out of class to play outside.”
“You set a desk on fire?” Savage’s brows drew together in disapproval.
“Yeah,” Zora half grinned at the memory. “They would have suspended anyone else. Probably sent them to a shrink. You know what they did to me?”
“I can’t imagine,” he rumbled.
“They gave me the rest of the day off to ‘collect myself’,” Zora laughed. “I was their golden child. I could do no wrong.”
“So you’ve never been given the discipline you need,” Savage said softly. “No wonder you don’t like it now.”
“I had a degree when I was thirteen,” Zora said. “Didn’t have to get a job until I was twenty seven, and then I just screwed around until they fired me.”
“That’s when you started drinking?”
“Nah,” Zora picked at her sleeping bag. “I’ve been drinking since I was fifteen.”
“My instincts were correct,” Savage said, leaning towards her, his large hands clasped between his legs. “You are a spoiled little brat.”
A naughty little smile crept across her lips and she looked up at him under her lashes. “I figured it would be the same when I found out why you grabbed me,” she admitted. “You needed me to do something, so I figured I could do whatever I wanted. Eventually you’d let me have my way because you needed me.”
“That didn’t work out as you planned, did it?” Savage chuckled.
“Not at all,” Zora smiled ruefully. “Not at all.”
They were both alien to one another. She’d never met anyone like him and he’d certainly never met anyone like her. He was used to people who did their jobs, fell in line and behaved themselves. He lived in a world where obedience to one’s superiors wasn’t just mandatory, it was as natural as breathing. She lived in a world where she was the only authority, and a poor one at that.
“I still can’t believe the things you do to me.” She paused and looked at him quickly before bowing her head again. “Yesterday, I… I felt silly. I was running around like a little kid in trouble and then you… made me eat soap.”
“Brought it home to you, did it?”
“Yeah,” Zora nodded. She was in full confession mode and the truth spilled out of her lips regardless of the wisdom of sharing it with the man who spanked her. “I should have just quit when I was ahead. But I kept doing things because I didn’t want you to know…” She trailed off, glancing at him quickly as if to see if she was sharing too much.
“Didn’t want me to know what?” He spoke in soft, cajoling tones.
“That I’m scared of you, of the spankings,” she said quietly. “I don’t want to keep getting beaten.”
“Well there is a simple way around that,” Savage said, shifting to sit on the platform near her. There was a vulnerability in her eyes that drew him in, convinced him to drop the super stern facade for a moment at least.
“What? Just do as I’m told? Change the habits of a lifetime in a few short weeks? Become a totally different person? It’s not that easy,” Zora wiped her eyes on her sleeve. “Especially when I know you’ll get rid of me when I’m no use to you anymore.”
There it was, the pain that underlay all her prickly resistance. Zora Matthews was used to being used for her talents and cast off once she’d performed. Savage’s heart went out to her. No wonder she’d been so unimpressed when it turned out that she was needed by the government. She’d always been needed, but she’d never been wanted.
“Listen Zora,” Savage took her chin and gently turned her face towards him. “I’m here to help you, okay? I’m not going to stop spanking you when I think you need it, but you can talk to me. I won’t leave you alone afterward anymore. You deserve better than that.”
She nodded timidly, the look in her eyes wary as if she couldn’t quite believe what he was saying. “Come here,” he said, pulling her into a hug. “I know you think you’ve only ever been wanted or needed for one thing,” he said, stroking her hair. “But I’m not going to treat you that way. You’re going to have rules and consequences because you need them. Yes, you have a job to do, but that’s not where my interest ends, understand? You’re a beautiful, intelligent woman who deserves to be cared about for more than just her mind.”
Zora’s shoulders shook as she dissolved silently into long overdue tears. He held her as she cried, knowing that he had now well and truly crossed the line. He could no longer preten
d that she was just another soldier to him. What she was precisely he couldn’t say, what he did know is that he felt compelled to guide and care for her, and he intended to do both to the best of his ability.
“Let me take care of you,” he murmured.
“Nobody can take care of me,” Zora sniffled against his neck. “I’m too bad. Eventually you’ll get tired of me, like all the others.”
“Oh no no,” Savage’s voice rumbled deeply. “Don’t you get it yet, Zora? I enjoy your rebellion. You can be as bad as you want to be, little girl. You’ll always end up in the same place.”
“Where’s that?”
“Let me show you,” his voice was a low purr as he gently guided her out of her sleeping bag and over his lap. She did not resist like she usually did and soon she lay over his lap wearing only a tank top and a pair of pink panties. “This is where you’ll always end up,” he said, patting the curve of her cheek. “Every time you misbehave.” He slapped her bottom with a swift, sharp smack. “Every time you test me.” Another slap landed across her lower cheeks. “You’ll find my lap ready and waiting for you.”
Zora squeaked when the slaps landed, but she did not thrash about or beg to be let up, instead she squirmed her hips in a subtle but sinuous grind, pressing herself against his hard thigh. Savage caught a groan in his throat. She had no idea what she was doing to him, what the sight of her rounded cheeks slowly gyrating over his lap did.
He spent a few moments rubbing her bottom and massaging her cheeks. The object of the exercise wasn’t to cause pain, it was to teach her that there was comfort to be found over his lap too. He couldn’t give into the erotic charge that ran between them, that would only teach her that he wanted her for her body, it would be another way he would be taking advantage of her, using her for his own ends.
“Do you understand what I am saying?” His voice was hoarse as he let her up and let her sit on his knee. She was lighter than he’d thought she would be, and the weight of her head against his chest was pleasant, not to mention the curve of her hip pressed against the erection he was doing his damnedest to ignore.
