Eglinton Street
Elderslie
Elie
Elliot Junction
Ellon
Elvanfoot
Eskbank and Dalkeith
Falkirk Camelon
Falls of Cruachan Halt
Fauldhouse North
Fearn
Findochty
Flemington
Forfar
Forsinard
Fountainhall Junction
Fraserburgh
Gailes
Galashiels
Galston
Garmouth
Gartly
Garve
Gatehead
Gatehouse of Fleet
Georgemas Junction
Giffnock
Gilbey’s Cottages Halt
Gilnockie
Girvan
Glasgow Buchanan Street
Glasgow Cross
Glasgow St. Enoch
Glassel
Glenbarry
Glencarron Halt
Glen Douglas Halt
Glenfarg
Glenluce
Glenwhilly
Golf Club House Halt
Gollanfield
Golspie
Gorebridge
Grandtully
Grange (Banffshire)
Grantown-on-Spey East
Grantown-on-Spey West
Grantshouse
Greenhill
Greenock Princes Pier
Gretna Green
Guard Bridge
Hairmyres
Happendon
Harburn
Hartwood
Hassendean
Hawick
Hawkhead
Helmsdale
Heriot
Highlandman
Hollybush
Holytown
Houston and Crosslee
Hoy Halt
Imperial Cottages Halt
Inches
Insch
Inveresk
Invergordon
Invershin
Inverugie
Inverurie
Joppa
Keith Town
Kelvin Hall
Kennethmont
Kennishead
Kentallen
Kershope Foot
Kilbarchan
Kilbirnie
Kilbowie
Kilconquhar
Kildonan
Kilkerran
Killiecrankie
Killin
Killin Junction
Kilmacolm
Kilmaurs
Kinaldie
Kinbrace
Kincraig
Kingshouse Halt
Kingskettle
Kingsknowe
Kinloss
Kintore
Kirkconnel
Kirkcowan
Kirkcudbright
Kirkintilloch
Kirkton Bridge Halt
Kittybrewster
Knock
Knockando
Knockando House Halt
Kyle of Lochalsh
Ladysbridge
Lairg
Lamington
Langholm
Langloan
Largo
Larkhall Central
Laurencekirk
Law Junction
Lesmahagow
Lhanbryde
Loch Awe
Locheilside
Lochluichart
Lochskerrow
Lochwinnoch
Logierieve
Longmorn
Longside
Lonmay
Lossiemouth
Lugton
Luib
Lumphanan
Lundin Links
Manuel
Maryhill Central
Mauchline
Maud Junction
Mawcarse
Maybole
Melrose
Merchiston
Midcalder
Milliken Park
Milnathort
Mintlaw
Mormond Halt
Mosspark West
Moy
Muirkirk
Mulben
Murthly
Musselburgh
Muthill
Neilston Low
Nethy Bridge
Newcastleton
New Cumnock
New Galloway
New Luce
Newmachar
Newmilns
Newseat Halt
Newtongrange
Newton Stewart
Nitshill
North Connel Halt
Old Kilpatrick
Orbliston
Ordens Halt
Orton
Oyne
Paisley Canal
Paisley West
Park
Parkhead Stadium
Partick West
Parton
Patna
Penton
Perth Princes Street
Peterhead
Philorth Bridge Halt
Philorth Halt
Piershill
Pinmore
Pinwherry
Pitcaple
Pitmedden
Pittenweem
Pittenzie Halt
Plockton
Pollokshaws West
Ponfeigh
Portessie
Portgordon
Portknockie
Portsoy
Possil
Racks
Rathen
Reston
Rhu Halt
Riccarton Junction
Riddings Junction
Rogart Halt
Rothes
Rothiemay
Rumbling Bridge
Ruthwell
St Boswells
St Combs
St Fort
St Monance
Salzcraggie
Sandilands
Sanquhar
Scotscalder
Scotstoun East
Scotstoun West
Shandon
Shankend
Shields Road
Shotts
Slateford
Southwick
Spey Bay
Springfield
Springside
Steele Road
Stewarton
Stobs
Stonehouse
Stow
Stragheath Halt
Stranraer Harbour
Stranraer Town
Strathaven Central
Strathcarron
Strathyre
Strichen
Stromeferry
Struan
Symington
Tain
Tarff
Tauchers Halt
Thankerton
Thornhill
Thornliebank
Thorntonhall
Throsk
Thurso
Tillicoultry
Tillynaught
Tollcross
Tomatin
Torphins
Towiemore Halt
Tullibardine
Tynehead
Udny
Uplawmoor for Caldwell
Urquhart
Waterside
West Calder
West Ferry
Whifflet Upper
Whistlefield Halt
Whiteinch Riverside
Wick
Yoker Ferry
Wales
Aberaman
Aberdare Low Level
Abergele
Abermule
Aberthaw
Abertridwr
Acrefair
Alltddu Halt
Amlwch
Arddleen Halt
Arthog
Bagillt
Bala
Bala Junction
Beavers’ Hill Halt
Berwyn Halt
Bettisfield
Bettws-y-Coed
Birchgrove Halt
Blaenau Ffestiniog
Blaengwynfi
Blaenrhondda
Bodorgan
Bontnewydd
Bonwm Halt
Bow Street
Briton Ferry
Bronwydd Arms
Bryngwyn
Brynkir
Bryn Teify
Buckley Junction
Caerau
Caergwrle Castle and Wells
Caernarvon
Caersws
Caldicot Halt
Caradog Falls Halt
Cardiff Clarence Road
Carno
Carreghofa Halt
Carrog
Cefn-y-bedd
Cemmes Road
Chwilog
Clarbeston Road
Clynderwen
Cockett
Commins Coch Halt
Connah’s Quay
Conway
Conwil
Corwen
Coryton Halt (Glam)
Cymmer Afan
Cynwyd
Deganwy
Derry Ormond
Dolgarrog
Dolgellau
Dolwyddelen
Drws-y-Nant
Duffryn Rhondda Halt
Felindyffryn Halt
Fenn’s Bank
Ferndale
Ferryside
Fishguard and Goodwick
Flint
Forden
Gaerwen
Garneddwen Halt
Gileston
Glan Conway
Glandyfi
Glan Llyn Halt
Glyndyfrdwy
Gowerton North
Groeslon
Hawarden
Hawarden Bridge
Heath Halt Low Level
Holywell Junction
Hope Village
Jordanston Halt
Kidwelly
Kilgetty
Lampeter
Lamphey
Landore
Llanbrynmair
Llandderfel
Llandow Halt
Llandow Wick Road Halt
Llandre
Llandrillo
Llanerchymedd
Llanfair
Llanfairfechan
Llanfechain
Llanfyllin
Llangefni
Llangollen
Llangower Halt
Llangwyllog
Llangybi (Caern)
Llangybi (Card)
Llangynwyd
Llanharan
Llanilar
Llanpumpsaint
Llanrhystyd Road
Llanrwst and Trefriw
Llansamlet North
Llansantffraid
Llantrisant
Llantwit Major
Llanuwchllyn
Llanwnda
Llanybyther
Llys Halt
Maerdy
Maesteg Castle Street
Maesycrugiau
Magor
Manorbier
Mathry Road
Matthewstown Halt
Menai Bridge
Montgomery
Mostyn
Mountain Ash Oxford Street
Nantyffyllon
Olmarch Halt
Pembrey and Burry Port
Penally
Pencader
Pencarreg Halt
Pencoed
Penmaenmawr
Penmaenpool
Penrhiwceiber Low Level
Penyffordd
Penygroes
Penyrheol
Peterston
Pontcynon Halt
Pontdolgoch
Pont Llanio
Pont-y-Pant
Pool Quay
Portskewett
Prestatyn
Pyle
Queensferry
Rhiwbina Halt
Rhoose
Rhosgoch
Rhosneigr
Roman Bridge
St Athan
St Clears
Sarnau
Saundersfoot
Sealand
Senghenydd
Shotton High Level
Shotton Low Level
Skewen
Strata Florida
Talacre
Talerddig
Tal-y-Cafn and Eglwysbach
Templeton
Tondu
Trawscoed
Tregaron
Trevor
Troedyrhiew Garth
Ty Cross
Tylorstown
Undy Halt
Valley
Welsh Hook Halt
Whitchurch (Glam)
Wnion Halt
Wolf’s Castle Halt
Ynys
Ynyshir
Ynyslas
Requiescant in pace
Acknowledgements
I wish to thank my editor, Helen, and my agent, Rachel, for all their help, support and friendship; thanks also to my beta readers Lesli, Gwen and Lisa.
A Note on the Author
Malcolm Pryce was born in the UK and has spent much of his life working and travelling abroad. He has been a BMW assembly-line worker, a hotel washer-up, a deck hand on a yacht sailing the South Seas, an advertising copywriter and the world’s worst aluminium salesman. He is the author of the bestselling Aberystwyth novels. He lives in Oxford.
@exogamist
www.malcolmpryce.com
By the Same Author
Aberystwyth Noir series:
The Day Aberystwyth Stood Still
From Aberystwyth with Love
Don’t Cry for Me Aberystwyth
The Unbearable Lightness of Being in Aberystwyth
Last Tango in Aberystwyth
Aberystwyth Mon Amour
Also available by Malcolm Pryce
The Aberystwyth Noir Series:
The Day Aberystwyth Stood Still
It’s May in Aberystwyth and the mayoral election campaign is underway. Private detective Louie Knight has just received a visit from a mysterious stranger called Raspiwtin asking him to track down a dead man called Iestyn Probert. Originally hanged for his part in the infamous raid on the Coliseum cinema, Iestyn Probert was later seen alive and well and boarding a bus to Aberaeron. Did he escape the hangman’s noose? Or could there be some truth to the rumours that he was resuscitated by aliens?
Now, as strange lights are spotted in the sky above Aberystwyth and a farmer claims to have had a close encounter with a lustful extraterrestrial, Iestyn Probert has been sighted once again. But what does Raspiwtin want with him? And why does Louie’s investigation arouse unwelcome interest from a shadowy government body and a dark-suited man in a black 1947 Buick?
‘Pryce continues to put a uniquely surreal spin on the hoary old conventions of noir writing ... it’s impossibly weird and, in parts, beautifully lyrical. Pryce’s many fans certainly won’t be disappointed’ Guardian
‘Surreal, absurd and very funny’ The Times
www.bloomsbury.com/MalcolmPryce
From Aberystwyth With Love
It is a sweltering August in Aberystwyth. A man wearing a Soviet museum curator’s uniform walks into Louie Knight’s office and spins a wild and impossible tale of love, death, madness and betrayal.
Sure, Louie had heard about Hughesovka, the legendary replica of Aberystwyth built in the Ukraine by some crazy nineteenth-century czar. But he hadn’t believed that it really existed until he met Uncle Vanya. Now the old man’s story catapults him into the neon-drenched wilderness of Aberystwyth Prom in search of a girl who mysteriously disappeared thirty years ago. Soon Louie finds his fate depending on two most unlikely talismans – a ticket to Hughesovka and a Russian cosmonaut’s sock.
‘This is the fifth in Malcolm Pryce’s surreal Aberystwyth series. The plots are bonkers, but you could read a score of crime novels before you found a more vividly realised setting than Pryce’s demented alternative universe. Or better jokes’ Daily Telegraph
‘I loved the latest installment of Malcolm Pryce’s hilarious experiment in “Welsh noir”, From
Aberyswyth With Love. I might have enjoyed my childhood holidays a bit more if I’d known that the town was so interesting’ New Statesman, Books of the Year
www.bloomsbury.com/MalcolmPryce
Don’t Cry For Me Aberystwyth
It’s Christmas in Aberystwyth and a man wearing a red-and-white robe is found brutally murdered in a Chinatown alley. A single word is scrawled in his blood on the pavement: ‘Hoffmann’. But who is Hoffmann? This time, Aberystwyth’s celebrated crime-fighter, Louie Knight, finds himself caught up in a brilliant pastiche of a cold-war spy thriller. From Patagonia to Aberystwyth, Louie trails a legendary stolen document said to contain an astonishing revelation about the ultimate fate of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, but he’s not the only one who wants it. A bewildering array of silver-haired spies has descended on Aberystwyth, all lured out of retirement by one tantalising rumour: Hoffmann has come in from the Cold. Louie Knight, who still hasn’t wrapped up his presents, just wishes he could have waited until after the holiday.
‘Hilarious’ Daily Telegraph
‘Inventive, funny and dark, Pryce packs more style into a sentence than most authors could hope for in volumes’ Big Issue
www.bloomsbury.com/MalcolmPryce
The Unbearable Lightness of Being in Aberystwyth
There is nothing unusual about the barrel-organ man who walks into private detective Louie Knight’s office. Apart from the fact that he has lost his memory. And his monkey is a former astronaut. And he is carrying a suitcase that he is too terrified to open. And he wants a murder investigated. The only thing unusual about the murder is that it took place a hundred years ago. And needs solving by the following week. Louie is too smart to take on such a case but also too broke to turn it down. Soon he is lost in a labyrinth of intrigue and terror, tormented at every turn by a gallery of mad nuns, gangsters and waifs, and haunted by the loss of his girlfriend, Myfanwy, who has disappeared after being fed drugged raspberry ripple...
‘Malcolm Pryce is the king of Welsh noir ... he dishes up a dastardly mix of gothic comedy where Edgar Allen Poe meets Phoenix Nights in a flurry of blood-stained absurdity’ Sunday Telegraph
‘Marvellously imaginative ... You’ll weep and laugh, on the same page. Wonderful’ Guardian
www.bloomsbury.com/MalcolmPryce/
Last Tango in Aberystwyth
The Case of the 'Hail Mary' Celeste Page 29
