To trust another man so soon, especially one ensured to keep me in constant contact with Drew, was playing with fire and I knew it.
But every time I looked into his eyes, I felt my resolve slip a little more. He was renewing me with every touch, every kiss. He served as my life support, to cure me of my terminal attraction to his manipulative, controlling brother. Minute by minute, I felt more like myself again, which was something I lost the very second Drew fast-tracked our romance the year before.
Going a week without this transformative touch, especially when he lived under the same roof, was torture. It was so close and so far… so good yet so dangerous.
That only made me want it more.
I felt like a schoolgirl as we sat through “family hour” that evening. We cooked dinner together, like we always did. Millicent and Max drove most of the conversation, while Alex and I shared hungry stares that I was almost completely certain Millicent had noticed but was much too gracious to acknowledge.
Max insisted on family game night, so we indulged a few kids’ games. He didn’t run out of steam until almost ten, and Millicent took the sleepy boy upstairs leaving us to clean up the kitchen.
Alex and I didn’t say anything as we stood side by side, cleaning each dish and putting them in the dishwasher. Just the heat of his body was intoxicating. I felt my pulse thunder as we stood shoulder to shoulder. He had rolled up the sleeves of his shirt, revealing his tanned, toned, forearms. My eyes returned time and again to those big, strong hands and long fingers I could already feel wrapped in my hair. I think I groaned a little as the feelings of anticipation overtook me. He glanced down at me, his eyes clouded with his own desire. He placed the last dish inside the dishwasher before kicking it closed with his boot. He shut off the water before he pulled me into an immediate embrace.
His possessive mouth landed on mine and he deepened the kiss immediately. Our hands were still wet but neither of us cared as we wrapped each other tight in one another’s arms. He picked me up effortlessly and carried me to the couch, where he pulled me into his lap. He cupped my face in one hand. “How did I ever live one day without you?” he pondered before he reached for another kiss.
I pulled him down until he leaned over me. Each kiss was hotter than the last, if that was possible. When his large hand finally covered my aching breast, I thought I might go up just like a bottle rocket. “Alex,” I gasped into his mouth, which made him groan and kiss me harder in response. I landed on the remote, which flipped on the TV, but we didn’t care. The brainless, generic sitcom blared on somewhere outside our subconscious as his fingers gently eased each of my shirt buttons free. The minute his warm mouth traveled across my bared skin, I thought I would split right in two. I writhed under him, desperate for the pleasure we had denied ourselves for so long. I gripped a handful of his dark hair and led him to the painfully hard peak of my breast. When his mouth finally closed over it, I nearly wept in sweet relief.
He toyed with my breast through my bra, as his tongue traced circles around the hardened nipple. I gasped as he teased me mercilessly. He adjusted his body over me until he fit himself in between my legs, sliding down just low enough to concentrate on my bared torso. Impatiently he released the bra. I teetered on the edge of the abyss as he sucked my breast into his mouth. I squirmed under him until I knocked pillows and even the remote onto the floor, which happened to change the channel onto the local news.
Only hearing the words, “Drew Fullerton” could have dragged me out of my sexually frustrated stupor. Despite myself, my brain struggled to process the information now coming from the TV, as Drew was questioned about his relationship with Olivia Guest as they attended her movie premiere in London.
“It is so refreshing to have a partner who can keep up with me,” he joked, and out of the corner of my eye I saw him cuddle his new pet.
It was like a bucket of cold water splashed all over me. I scrambled to reach the remote so I could get his hateful face out of my sight. Alex propped up and quickly realized what was going on. He grabbed the remote and turned the TV off completely.
I was embarrassed and mortified as I closed my shirt with one hand. His mouth thinned in a hard line as he lifted himself away from me to perch on the edge of the sofa. He took deep, shaking breaths to steady himself. I had never felt like such a shit as I pulled myself into a sitting position. “Alex,” I said as I reached for him, but he didn’t even look at me.
“He’s always going to be between us, isn’t he?” he asked quietly.
“That’s not what this is about,” I argued but when his eyes met mine I had to shrink back.
“Then what is it about?” he asked. I struggled to find the right words, so he filled them in for me. “You see his face and you pull away from me. In your heart, you still belong to him. Even after all he’s done.”
I wanted to argue, but I was holding my shirt together, suddenly modest about my nakedness in front of a man I had burned for all week. The only variable in the equation was Drew. I closed my eyes and covered my face with my hands.
“He’s a selfish prick, Rachel. A two-timing asshole who doesn’t give a shit about anyone else but himself.”
“I know that,” I said softly, unable to look him in the eye.
“Then what is this hold he has on you?”
I sighed as I swung my legs to the floor. “I wish I knew,” I confessed. “Believe me. It’s not doing me any favors.”
He nodded as he accepted my answer. “I’d rather let you go than see you hurt anymore.”
“That’s not what I want,” I insisted as I reached for his arm.
His smile was sad as he faced me. “And that’s the problem, isn’t it? You really don’t know what you want.”
I opened my mouth but no words came. Instead I watched helplessly as he rose to his feet and stalked from the room.
He was gone to the track by the following morning. I tried to put forth a brave face for Max and Millicent, who were blissfully unaware of my emotional turmoil.
I couldn’t believe that just the image of Drew could turn my whole spirit upside down. As hard as I was falling for Alex, it would seem that I hadn’t fallen any less out of love with his toxic brother. And I knew that the minute I realized I wanted to claw Olivia’s eyes out for being at his side.
When Alex returned home, he wore a friendly smile for everyone, even me. Only I could see the sadness in his eyes, which broke my heart. When he turned in early, even before Millicent took Max to bed, I knew that I had royally messed up.
I wanted to go to his bed, to prove to him that no matter what residual hold Drew had on me I was committed to going forward with Alex. I feared he’d turn me away, so I stayed in my office study instead, putting my frustration to good use by preparing Jonathan’s studies for the following week.
At least that was what I told myself. Instead I went online to research the budding relationship between Drew and Olivia. If her social media was to be believed, it was clear they were moving forward with their own romance. They traveled together, went to premieres and events together, and showed up on every single gossip site as the new It couple.
I was but a forgotten footnote six months after I wore his ring.
I read every painful detail, hoping it’d be the tidbit that would sever whatever ties were left between Drew and me.
Instead I dragged myself to bed at two o’clock in the morning, defeated and depressed.
Sunday followed the same pattern as Saturday. Alex was gone, and I had to play Little Rachel Sunshine for Millicent and Max.
After Millicent put Max down for a nap, she suggested we do a deep clean on the kitchen. As we worked, pulling everything out of the cabinets to scrub them all down, she chatted happily about the news, the weather, and the harvest we could expect from our garden. “You’ve really got a green thumb,” she marveled.
I grinned. “Thank my Gram. She taught me everything I know. I’m just excited I can put those skills to work again. I missed
it.”
She nodded. “There’s something rewarding watching a plant you have nurtured and pruned and tended bear fruit. Same is true for kids, as I’m sure you know as a teacher.”
I nodded. “Maybe that’s part of the appeal.”
“You should be very proud. You’re very good at what you do.”
“Thanks, Millicent,” I said as I started my next cabinet.
“I love to clean,” she said as she did likewise. “No matter how dirty something gets, you can shine it up bright with a little time and a little work. Alex wanted to hire a housekeeper but I never could get used to that idea. We had one, of course, when Nina was sick. There was just so much to do,” she trailed off.
“That must have been really tough,” I said quietly.
Millicent rested on her heels as she glanced around the opulent mansion she called home. “It felt like a tomb no matter what we did. That never quite went away, even years after she had gone.” Millicent’s eyes met mine. “You’re bringing this place to life just like you cultivated that garden.”
I didn’t know quite what to say. “I get a lot of help,” I tried to dismiss.
She shook her head. “It’s you. You brought the sunshine back into this stuffy old place. And it’s a good thing. We’re all really lucky to have you in our lives. I just thought you should know that.”
Was this her way of giving me her blessing? “Thanks, Millicent.”
She smiled and we resumed our cleaning.
I was even more confused than before. Everyone needed something different from me, and I was completely clueless how to meet every need without losing myself in the process.
I just figured out how to find my own ray of sunshine, but that was much easier said than done.
Alex didn’t return for dinner, sending us a text that he was dining at the track with other trainers and owners after the races ended that evening. I tried to wait up for him, but I gave up around midnight.
By the time Jonathan returned on Monday morning, I wasn’t even sure Alex came home at all.
When he got home that night, it was business as usual. We bonded as a family unit over games and dinner. I spent the better part of the week teaching Jonathan how to play pool, and each night we’d retire onto the patio to enjoy the summer night sky.
Max would always insist that Alex sing, and he would always oblige. The boys would dance with me, but Alex maintained he needed to provide the music, so he’d shy away from Max’s insistence that he and I should dance.
At night, after the kids went to bed, Alex would lock himself into the library. The only good news we had that week was that Jonathan had permission to head down to San Diego with Alex, provided I didn’t go with them. Oddly the directive came from Elise and not Drew. She was concerned that he was becoming too attached to me, and now that he was on his best behavior with both parents, she felt that any additional time together was superfluous.
Instead she wanted to make it a family affair, so my ticket was given, rightly, to his mother.
By the next week, however, Max had come down with a bit of a bug. So Millicent decided to stay home with him as well. It ended up being the wisest decision when his fever started to inch even higher by Thursday night, a day after everyone had already headed down to the convention.
She was at the doctor’s office with him when Drew came calling that Friday afternoon.
My heart stopped when I saw him on that threshold, remembering all too well what had happened the last time he had been there. “What do you want?” I said, knowing full well that his visit was not coincidental to Alex’s being out of town.
It was an odd case of déjà vu.
“May I come in?” he asked.
I glanced over his business suit. Obviously he had come from the office. “It’s your family home,” I said as I stepped back and opened the door.
He walked past me. “Where can we speak privately?” he asked.
“Why do we need to?” I shot back.
“Trust me, I’d rather be anywhere else but here,” he said as he led the way to the formal living room. It was dusted and clean as a whistle, but obviously unused. My feet dragged as I followed him.
“Then why are you here, Drew?”
“Logistics,” he said simply as he took a seat in one of the chairs, crossing one leg elegantly over the other. His face was stoic as he clasped his hands in his lap. As handsome as he looked, he resembled a snake about to strike. “Please, sit,” he finally commanded when I seemed reluctant to do so.
I perched on the edge of the sofa like a bird ready to take flight at any hint of a predator attack. If past history was any indication, this was a significant concern.
He studied my face behind unreadable eyes. “Olivia will be moving into my home by summer’s end,” he announced. “Jonathan needs a stable family environment with two committed partners, and I plan to move forward with a more … official relationship with her.”
I gulped back any reaction. “Why does that concern me?”
“Your belongings are still in my guest room,” he stated. “You left in such a hurry, and I don’t have the time to collect them. I’d like you to come get your things and clean out the room, since you have made it very plain you have no plans to return.”
The thought of going back to his house intimidated the hell out of me. I could only hope that didn’t show on my face.
“I could get Simone or the household staff to do it, of course, but I thought I’d respect your privacy and ask that you do it instead.”
I scoured his face for any hint of this being another trick. “Fine,” I said. “I’ll come by tomorrow.”
“Good,” he said with a slick smile. “Perhaps now you might offer me a drink,” he suggested with a slightly arched eyebrow.
“Is there anything else we need to discuss?” I asked.
“I haven’t really been kept up to speed on Jonathan’s progress. If you’re not busy, of course,” he added with an odd gleam in his eye.
“No,” I said as I rose to get him a drink. There was a globe bar stand with heavy crystal and expensive bourbon I knew Alex never really touched. I poured the drink and walked over to where Drew sat. My hand shook slightly as I handed him the glass, which he took, brushing my fingers in the process.
I tried to hide my sharp intake of breath, and damn near choked on my tongue as he rose languidly to his feet. “Do you have a work space?” he asked as his eyes glittered at me.
“The library,” I managed.
He nodded. “After you, Miss Dennehy,” he said in a voice so soft it felt like a caress.
I cursed every visceral reaction I was having to this man as I led the way to the library. My legs didn’t even feel like they belonged to me. I sat at the desk and pulled up my spreadsheet of Jonathan’s recent scores. He walked around behind the desk to peer over my shoulder.
“He’s doing very well,” I managed as I tried to ignore the onslaught of his aftershave marching up my nose. I remembered that scent well. It had haunted my dreams for months. I made the mistake of going to the mall once, and I had to leave the department store the minute I smelled someone spraying a sample of it for a customer. “As you can see, he’s made tremendous progress over the last couple of weeks,” I said as I glanced at his face, only to find him staring down at me, and right down my shirt.
I froze in my chair until he straightened up and walked around the desk, pausing at the bay window where his son often worked. He took a long sip from his glass as he stared outside. “He’s working a lot with Alex, I hear,” he said without turning to face me. “Particularly with the horses.”
I nodded, which was stupid considering he couldn’t see it. “He has a real passion for them,” I said. “It’s really the only thing he responded to when he first started coming here.”
“That sounds familiar,” he said softly with an absent smile. “You also took him camping,” he said, more of a statement than a question.
“Yes,” I con
firmed anyway. I could see nostalgia wash over him. Silently he drained his glass as he surveyed the property. His eyes were bright as he turned to face me.
“Excellent,” he said. “I’ll send a car for you tomorrow morning.”
“That’s not necessary,” I replied but he held up a hand.
“You have to retrieve your car as well. It is merely practical.”
“Of course,” I said. I rose from my chair and followed him from the library and down the hall to the foyer. Before he left, he turned to give me the glass. Once again our hands touched, and he didn’t move away. In fact, his eyes held me fast as he assessed all the data he found marching across my face. “Thank you for the drink,” he said softly. “You’ve been very… hospitable.”
I said nothing as he stepped outside, but I breathed a sigh of relief as I closed the door between us.
So that was that, I figured. I’d get my things and have no ties whatsoever to the house in Beverly Hills. He would marry Olivia, as he probably should have done from the start, and the chapter of my life that included any kind of romance with Drew Fullerton was officially over.
There were no tears as I processed this information. I was quiet for the rest of the evening, but I didn’t mourn.
In fact it was exactly the green light I needed to move forward with Alex. Suddenly that was all I wanted to do. I sent Alex one simple text.
“I know what I want. I want you.”
He didn’t answer right away, but I assumed that they were all busy with the chaos that was Comic Con.
I didn’t start to worry until night fell. Max was home and resting in his room, so Millicent and I shared a quiet dinner alone. We turned in early, and I was trying to concentrate on a book by the time he called me around ten-thirty that night.
“I was starting to worry,” I told him when I answered.
“Busy day,” he said quietly. “I think Jonathan stopped at every table in artist alley. But he’s having the time of his life.”
I chuckled. “And you?”
“It’s fun,” he said. “But I’m counting the days until I can come home.”
Entangled: Book 2 of the Fullerton Family Saga Page 11
