“That sounds like Jack. That time we went camping for two weeks? He showed up with five pairs of socks, five pairs of underwear, some track pants and his football jersey. He literally just dumped what was on his chair in a duffle and showed up. Dude was wearing my clothes the entire trip.” Ethan sounded like a bemused uncle more than his best friend. “I’m more of a list kind of guy.” He leaned over to show me his smart phone. Sure enough the screen showed an organizational system that would rival the Army’s. Items were sorted into categories, and prioritized according to importance and ideal packing times. According to the tally Ethan was on 77% packed and on track to be completely done in two days’ time.
“I guess you’re a little bit different than Jack.” I reached over to return his phone, laughing. “It’s only the fact that he can think on his feet that’s kept him alive this long. Outside of school I swear that boy doesn’t plan more than five minutes into the future. I was always a little surprised he could keep his focus on getting into a school.”
“Jack can be a bit of an airhead about some things, but he knows how important getting his education is; especially to you. He doesn’t mess up important things.”
“So what are you looking forward to this year. Classes? Lacrosse? The parties?” I tried to steer the conversation into less loaded waters.
“Actually I haven’t thought about it much. It’ll be nice to get on the field again I guess.” He sat beside me and stared intently, making me fumble with my folding.
“Mainly I’ve been wishing that summer would never end.” While the words sounded like every kid’s end of summer lament, the tone in his voice and the way he was looking at me was anything but childish. Suddenly I felt very self conscious about the flimsy tank top I was wearing. My fingers turned clumsy and I dropped the jeans I was in the middle of folding.
“I got it.” Ethan said, as he reached over to pick them up for me. Instead of handing them back to me, he sat on the floor in front of the couch and proceeded to fold them himself. “Melody, am I making you nervous?” The straightforward question left me little room for evasion.
“Why would I be nervous? I am sitting here with my child’s best friend and I’m thinking about the way his breath catches when he orgasms. I’m living in a world so far from anything I know or understand; why would that stress me out?” No long able to sit, I pushed the laundry aside and started to pace. “I’m a middle aged women lusting after a college kid. I’m the worst kind of cliché, a monster…” Suddenly out of breath, and words, I stared out the window, trying to make sense out of the conflicting emotions coursing through me.
“You’re beautiful.” Ethan said it so simply, more like a statement of fact than a compliment. “And so sexy. Do you know what you do when you cum?” He started to move towards me still on the floor, his 6-foot frame needing to do little more than reach to grab my waist and pull me onto his lap. “Your eyes, those big blue eyes go all cloudy and you bite your bottom lip, and then you,” his hands started to slip under her yoga pants, “shiver all over. It drives me wild. Even thinking about it get me worked up.” His fingers, long and skilled started to stroke my thighs, my hips, before focusing on my pussy, sending quivering sensations vibrating through my whole body.
“Ethan, we can’t!” I knew there was a reason why they couldn’t, a good reason, but right now my brain was unable to override my body which was completely at the mercy of those fingers. “Oh god, why do we always end up here.”
“Because I can’t help myself. Not when you get all flushed and worked up.” Shifting his weight, he scooped me up and placed me on the couch in one fluid motion. “And really you started it, talking about my breath. Makes me want to make sure I properly remember that shiver of yours.”
My yoga pants had not made the trip to the couch with me it seemed. Slowly Ethan peeled off my black panties, watching all of me with the expression of a man given a porterhouse steak after a week of fasting. Methodically taking his time, he began to lick the all sensitive parts of me, making sure nothing went unnoticed. I was now completely helpless, my bones melted by the heat between my legs. When he lightly bit my clit I cried out, unable to handle the total tsunami of sensation.
“And there go your eyes, all cloudy and liquid. Means I’m getting close.” Using the tips of his fingers to stroke while his tongue danced over me, in me, he pushed me closer to the edge. And then I fell over it, into a world of nameless pleasure and light. Control a distant memory, I could do nothing but ride the waves of pleasure so extreme that I was sure I forgot to breath.
When my eyes cleared, and my brain reengaged, I looked at Ethan, this boy who was more of a man than most my age, who made my body sing in a way I had never felt before. I wondered how I was going to say goodbye. And then I watched as all the color drained from his face. He stared up and stared at the doorway behind us. The doorway from where my son, face ashen and eyes livid, was watching us.
“I can explain, Jack.” Ethan started to speak as I frantically searched for my pants, and my composure.
“You can explain? How? How can you explain what you and my mother,” Jack stopped unable to make his mouth say the words, “what you just did. Have been doing? All summer have you been living here and fucking my mother?” Jack’s color had gone from ashen to red hot, all the blood rushing to his head making him dizzy with anger and betrayal. “I said help yourself to anything you want, man. I didn’t mean my mother!”
He was yelling now, looking at me as I was pulling on my pants and trying to regain an iota of dignity. “Mom, how could you? Have you been whoring around with all my friends?” Still yelling, Jack stared at me, hurt beyond belief, “I don’t even know who you are.”
“That’s enough, Jack. You do not talk to her like that.” Ethan had found his voice and in contrast to his scream, it was low and measured. “It just happened between us. We tried to fight it, man. You know we would never want to hurt you.” He reached an arm over me, as I had started to sob. “This thing between us, isn’t about you at all.”
“Never want to hurt me? Not about me? What planet are you living on Ethan? You’re a college kid screwing around with your friend’s mom? Next thing your going to tell me you’re in love.”
“That’s about right.” Ethan stood his ground, unbowed to the torrent of his friend’s anger. “That actually is exactly right.”
“Go to hell. And find your own goddamn ride there.” Ethan stormed out and minutes later we heard the growl of his beat up sedan gun out of the driveway.
For minutes, Ethan and I just stood there, stunned and unsure of how to proceed. I was no longer crying, now hollow eyed and colorless, automatically moved to start picking up the laundry that was spilled across the floor.
“He was mad. He didn’t mean it. He’ll calm down and we can talk to him.” Ethan stood trying to forge a path forward for us. “You didn’t deserve what he said.”
“Oh Ethan, of course he meant it. And I did deserve it, all of it. We broke his heart.” I gave up trying to do something, anything really, and sat on the couch, pulling a blanket around me. I was so cold now. “I know my son, he’ll come back when he calms down and he might even forgive us, but he will never forget.” I looked at Ethan, still standing, still trying to figure out how to make this right.
“Ethan this can never happen again. We can never happen again. I will not lose my son, not for anything.” And with that I stood and slowly walked to my room, leaving Ethan alone, still standing.
Chapter Thirteen
Jack had been laying in his dorm room, headphones on, when Ethan came storming into the room. Without a sound, Jack shifted his position, creating a barrier that spoke louder than his words would be able to.
In the time that it took Ethan to come back to campus, Jack had much to process. He still could see his Mom and best friend wrapped up in one another. So many questions flooded his mind. How long had this been going on? Was it the first encounter, or one of many? Who made the first move? How was
he ever going to look his mother in the eye again?
He wasn’t prepared yet to talk to Ethan. In fact, he wondered if he’d ever be comfortable talking to him again. He’d opened up his home to his best friend and apparently Ethan used that to his advantage. His mother had to have been lonely. Vulnerable.
“Jack, I know you don’t want to talk to me, and I respect that man, I do.” Ethan began, clearing his throat, “I can’t imagine what you think of me, but I just want you to know, I’d never do anything to hurt your Mother. I’m sorry I hurt you, though.”
Jack sat there in stony silence, pretending to read a book that he had grabbed from nearby. He thought about the words his friend had said and while his mind kept repeating all the questions he had in his head, only one came out, “Do you love her?”
He didn’t know why he chose that one when there was so much vitriol in the rest of them. Perhaps it was because none of the other questions mattered as much as the one he spoke.
“I didn’t think I’d love anyone. I tried so hard to love Lila, and yet the only time I was even close was when Cole was born. Your mother,” Ethan paused, gathering the courage to face his friend, “is special to me. I do love her, more than I ever thought possible. I’m sorry we hurt you, you must believe that.”
“What will do you do now?”
It was Ethan’s turn to look away, the pain in his heart threatening to betray his voice. “She broke it off with me after you stormed out. Whatever it was going to be, isn’t.”
Jack turned back around and faced the wall.
Neither of them spoke to each other again for the rest of the night.
****
Light broke through the window and Jack woke to find Ethan already gone for the day. There was nothing but a bed tightly made up with fresh linens and a note folded crisply on the pillow for him.
Jack,
I know it had to be hard to see what you saw, and if I could take it back I would. You seeing it, that is. I would not take back loving Melody. For a long time I tried to make it work with Lila. She was my first real girlfriend, but there was never that connection, that feeling that you belong. Ever since I first spoke with Melody, I couldn’t resist her. It’s not just physical, there’s a real connection there.
I’m trying to do right for everyone involved. She’s asked me not to contact her so that she can repair the damage done to your relationship with her. That’s key to her, nothing else matters more than you. I respect that as a father myself.
I’m still here, hopefully still your friend even though I will understand if that isn’t possible. I can transfer to another dorm room at the start of the next semester if you’d prefer.
Everything is in your hands now, Jack.
Again, I’m sorry.
Ethan
Jack read it twice, knowing that in the end, he would end up forgiving them both. But for now, he just needed to be by himself to deal with it.
Chapter Fourteen
Two weeks later…
The tension between Ethan and Jack had started to erode over the past two weeks. Slowly, the two were getting back to how it used to be. The only thing that really seemed different was the way that Ethan didn’t really want to do anything but go to class and study.
To Jack, it seemed that the fire had gone out of him. Ethan saw Cole on the weekends, and played with him, reading to him every night. One night, Jack overheard him tell a fishing story to Cole while he was trying to get him to fall asleep, and he could have swore he heard him cry during it.
He’d never heard Ethan cry.
****
Ethan had been out of the dorm all day, which wasn’t like him on a weekend. Finally, just before nightfall, there was a tentative knock on the door. It was close to the holidays, and Jack knew there were many going door to door to collect food to distribute to the homeless during Thanksgiving.
Jack scrounged to grab a few cans that were sitting by the makeshift dorm kitchen; a toaster oven, a hotplate, and a well-worn microwave. After grabbing enough to make a donation, he opened the door to see Ethan there, red-eyed from crying, carrying Cole in one arm and a duffle in the other.
“She left, Ethan.”
“Who left? And don’t stand out there, bring the baby in and get comfortable. Why have you been gone all day?” He had so many questions he barely slowed down long enough to give him a chance to even answer.
Ethan sighed, dropped his duffle, and got Cole situated on his cot. As soon as he was settled, he turned to begin.
“I got a text from Lila late last night right before I was fixing to come home. Well, not home, but here, you know what I mean. Anyway, I’d been trying to avoid you, obviously, so that you wouldn’t have to deal with seeing me. I know you are still upset and I was giving you space.”
Jack nods and rolls his hand as if to say, “yea yea hurry up and get to the point.”
“She texted me to say that she’s fell in love with someone, someone named Grady, and that she just had to see if it would work. Apparently there is some issue there and she texted me to come get Cole, said she couldn’t care for him right now and that she needed me to watch him for a while. I drove there and got him and have spent the rest of the time just taking care of him and thinking.”
“Why didn’t you come back here?”
“I did.” Ethan still hasn’t looked Jack in the eye. He knows that at any moment, Ethan may come undone.
“No I meant before then. We could have figured this out sooner, when it wasn’t so late.”
Cole cries and is getting fussy. Other than a bag of clothes, there isn’t anything there.
“I don’t know. I don’t know what I’m going to do. I guess I could get some of my trust fund and hire a nanny.”
“We’ll get this sorted, I swear it.”
The soft shuddering as Ethan breaks down is too much for Jack. He walks over and sits beside him, wrapping an arm around him. There is a long exhale as he starts to speak.
“I know someone that would be great to help.”
“Yea? Who?” Ethan looks at him for the first time since coming through the door, wiping away the wetness underneath his left eye.
“My mother.”
Ethan shakes his head and looks down at the floor. “No, no. I can’t, I just… no.”
“Listen, I’ve been thinking. Both of you have seemed so down lately. You can clearly tell that it is ripping you both apart that you two aren’t together. I remember how my mom was when we were there, happy and alive. So were you. Now you both…. There’s a light in each of you that has died.”
“She is?”
“Every Skype call she is less herself. Or actually, she’s more like she was after the divorce and not the new, better version of herself.”
“I didn’t know. I haven’t talked to her.”
“You worry about finding a nanny to help around here, and I will go call Mother. Then, you both should talk.”
“All right, whatever you think. I’ll call a service and get someone in the next few days.”
“And Ethan?”
He looks up from the bed as he cradles Cole, “Yes?”
“You’re coming to Thanksgiving dinner. We’re going to all be together as a family.”
And with that final statement, Jack turns to leave the dorm, clutching his cell in his hand.
Chapter Fifteen
The service was right in that they had someone perfect that was available to us. Thanks to a sizable trust fund that Ethan had been hoarding for graduate school, the nanny came to them ready to help out on weekends and during class hours.
Jack was not above taking in her beauty. Alexandria stood about 5‘5, with soft flowing brown hair and jade green eyes. Her body wasn’t rail thin nor was it overweight, the perfect collage of fit and curvy. From first glance, she took Jack’s breath away.
But more than that, he noticed that Ethan didn’t take note at all of her features, instead focusing on her job skills and his requirements.
> He hoped that it wasn’t too late for Ethan and his mom to have a real start at a life together, or at least a relationship no matter how long term it was. He knew he had been selfish, but now that he understood, he couldn’t keep them apart. He’d regret it the rest of his life.
****
While I was shocked at first to get the call from Jack in the middle of the afternoon, I was thrilled as well. Things had been so…. stiff between us since the incident, and there wasn’t anything to do to sway his mind. I kept telling him how much he means to me and assuring him that it would never happen again.
Hell, I haven’t heard a word from Ethan since he promised to leave me be when he left here that night. I was both appreciative of him keeping his word, and saddened that he could keep the promise.
But here was Jack, telling me about Lila, about some girl named Alexandria, and about how he wanted nothing more than to make things right. He apologized. I can’t even wrap my head around that. He apologized to me for storming out and not having a rational discussion then and there. And then he asked if they could all come to dinner.
I couldn’t say yes fast enough.
****
The holidays were always a special time in the Fisher household, even when it was just Jack and I. There was always plenty to eat, and this Thanksgiving was not going to be any different. I made sure that all his favorites were there; roasted turkey and gravy, mashed potatoes, yeast rolls, green beans, candied carrots, and for dessert, a chocolate cake. I even made sure that Cole had plenty to mush up and have.
So yes, it was a traditional holiday meal, other than the fact that Jack’s best friend would be at the head of the table carving the turkey while Jack fussed with Cole in his playpen. For only a moment I thought back to the last time it was even close to this; back when Russell was carving the bird while checking his cell phone. It was only a week or so later that I realized that he was having an affair.
Alone With the Best Friend (Alone #1) Page 4
