The Angel Side

by Heaven Liegh Eldeen

Seeing Zepar’s hesitation to help, I thought of asking another but he had been the best at healing in the Underworld. I didn’t blame him for not rushing to Etta’s side. He had every reason to hate me and want me dead. When I had been known as Rahovart the Heir, Zepar’s son had been thrown in the cells to be tortured before being banished to the Wastelands for having relations with one of my concubines. When I caught his wife trying to free their son, I threw them both to the Susman. But being a good soldier, he came to Etta’s aid.

  “If she dies, you die with her.” I admonished Zepar, wary of his reluctance as I carried Etta’s limp body to the infirmary.

  For a moment I watched as Zepar and his assistants frantically rattled around the potion room. As much as I wanted to sit by her side as she fought for her life, I had to attend to the imperative matters of the power shift. Confident he had taken my threat to heart, I expected Zepar would find a way to save her life. I returned to the throne room to a mass of chaotic chattering.

  Persephone approached, handing me a handful of red dust. I found it hard to believe someone’s soul would fit in the palm of my hand. My breath hitched as I fought back the tears welling up. I had to keep a strong façade if I wanted to accomplish the tasks set out before me. Sucking back the sorrow rising inside, I put on my ‘big boy panties’ as Etta would have put it.

  “Silence!” I commanded, bringing a sudden hush to the room. “Generals…dismiss your legions to their usual duties.” I continued.

  Upon my order, the generals dismissed their men, taking the wounded with them. Once the room had been cleared, the generals took formation at the base of the steps.

  “Arches, John, please step forward.”

  The Arches approached with indignation. Gabriel, with obvious resentment written on his face, folded his arms across his chest, shaking his head at my new role.

  “Something on your mind, Brother?” I asked.

  “Don’t you dare call me brother! Do you realize what you’ve done? And for what? You betrayed us again!” Gabriel screamed as Michael put his arm around him.

  “I did it for all of us. In time you will see. I’m sorry. I didn’t intend to hurt you, Brother.” I pleaded, making my way down the stairs toward Gabriel.

  Gabriel turned away from me. Jerking his hand from his chest, I forced Etta’s dust into his hands.

  “Take this to Father.” I said.

  “Why should I help a Demon?” Gabriel sneered.

  “Because this Demon is still your brother and still loves you. Nothing has changed except my appearance. Be sure Father gets it. Maybe he can put it back together.”

  “And if he can, then what? You dangle it in front of her the way Lucifer did to ensure she never leaves you?” Gabriel snipped.

  “What Etta chooses to do now is up to her. I wouldn’t impose this fate on her.”

  Gabriel searched me for a sign of deceit. I assumed he found none when he embraced me.

  “I love you, Rahovart. Please, don’t choose to become my enemy. I don’t want to but unlike with Lucifer, there is no rule which states I can’t kill you.” Gabriel whispered in my ear as he squeezed me.

  “Never happen, Brother.” I replied, slapping my hands on his shoulders.

  “Now for the matter of the throne. It is common knowledge, should Lucifer fall, Etta is to sit in power. Should harm fall upon her, the throne goes to her male offspring. Now I know Lucifer intended it to mean his children, but it is not the situation we find ourselves in. Etta has three heirs; the oldest is an eight year old female. I see the problems this poses, so I have decided Annahail, Botis, and Uphir shall equally rule under the guardianship of Persephone and Nicor until they are of proper age. Any objections?” I paused, giving each a chance to voice their objection.

  “Very well then. We are done here. Generals, you are dismissed. Arches, you may return home.” I said, turning back toward Persephone, Nicor, and the children.

  “Wait! What of the war hammer?” Uriel called out.

  Nicor’s actions that day had been more than enough proof he would put his life above my children’s. He had no intention of using his war hammer or scutum against the powers of Heaven.

  “Tell Father Nicor will keep the weapons until the heirs reach an age which no longer requires our protection and they will only be used for such.” I said, glancing over my shoulder at him.

  “We’ll see what Father says about it.” Uriel chided.

  As the Arches left, a sharp pang pierced my chest. I would never know the joy of flashing with my brothers ever again. I would miss the horseplay, the joking around, and the comfort knowing they always had my back. Now, I would be forever their enemy. I prayed with the hope and promise the children held, I would never have to face the Arches in battle. The pain subsided as I knelt down to inventory the children for any possible injuries they may have suffered.

  “You didn’t mention yourself in your speech.” Nicor said as I check Annahail’s throat.

  “I can’t stay here. I’ll put you and the kids in more danger.” I replied as I hung my head.

  When I returned to the Angel side, I betrayed any allegiances I had in Hell, putting a target on my back. If I stayed and named myself guardian over Annahail and her brothers, I feared my enemies would hurt one of them in reprisal for my crimes. To ensure their safety and ascent to the throne, I would have to leave them with those who still had allies strong enough to lay their life on the line for them.

  “Don’t go.” Annahail tugged at my chiton.

  The short time I spent with them, we had developed a strong bond. Though they weren’t of my blood, they were mine and I would strike anyone who dared to say anything different. I didn’t want to leave the three behind, but I had no other choice. Seeing how Nicor and Persephone put it all on the line for their grandchildren, I knew they were in good hands.

  “I have to, sweetie. I won’t be far away. This isn’t goodbye. It’s see you later. You can come visit me anytime you want. But don’t worry; I’m not leaving just yet. Why don’t you and your brothers go play, and I’ll go check on mommy.” I said, crouching down next to her. Annahail flung her tiny arms around my neck squeezing as tightly as she was able to.

  “Thank you.” she whispered as she let go.

  “Why don’t you take them to their new room?” I said to Persephone as I stood.

  “We can assign you a protection detail. Are you sure about this?” Persephone questioned.

  “Believe me, it’s for the best. Once I settle in I’ll let you know where I’m holed up at. Now go let those kids play.” I said, waving Persephone and Nicor off.

  Alone, I stood in the room, taking a breath. I hadn’t the slightest idea where I would go once I left. I doubted John wanted a Demon living with him again, and the Wastelands were too dangerous to be hanging out in the open. Glancing around the room, I’d been taken aback by the amount of life lost this day. So many fought and died. Sitting on the steps, I cradled my head in my hands, allowing the tears that had built up for so long flow. No longer having the ability to pray, I secretly wished this would be the last massacre our worlds would face.

  “It is a sad day when we lose so many, no matter the side they fight for.” Father’s voice echoed.

  “Father?” I exclaimed, jumping to my feet.

  “I received your message. I must say I’m proud of you, Son.”

  “Proud of me?” I asked, unable to hide my confusion.

  “Yes. You have proven time and time again you will go to the edge and jump off for the sake of others.”

  “I took a huge jump this time. So, where does it leave us?” I replied.

  “It depends all on you, Rahovart. I have been told Etta may or may not live and with the powder I received, she is not whole. Even if she lives, she may be forever trapped as a Wraith.”

  My heart sank. Did Father come to eradicate the one thing He believed to threaten him the most? I’d protect Etta against Demons, Arches, and sometimes even herself but if it came down to p
sychically fighting Father, I was afraid I’d lose before the word go. My only chance would be to try and appeal to his softer side.

  “She loves you so much. She would never do anything to hurt you. Father, I assure you, she is no threat to you.” I pleaded.

  “Tell me about the children.” Father scanned the throne room.

  “The kids? They’re wonderful. You should see them. They’re so full of hope and promise. I truly believe they will bring peace with them.”

  “I have seen them, and I believe you are right. They hold the promise of better days for us all. Take Etta home, my son. I will see what I can do about repairing her soul.”

  A Demon didn’t have the ability to pray, but somehow mine had been answered. Father simply telling me to take her home didn’t mean I had the capability to do so.

  “Home, Father? She’s barely alive. I don’t know if she’s going to make it.” I contested.

  “Yes. Home. Trust me. If Etta were going to die, she would have already. Her spirit has been through quite the shock. She simply needs rest and to wake up where she feels safe.”

  “But we have no home, Father.”

  “If you think about it long enough, you will see where your true home has been all along.” Father smiled then left.

  I had been surprised by Father’s visit but even more surprised by his willingness to help a Demon and a Wraith. The thought of Father distracting me while the Arches disposed of Etta fluttered in my head. I flashed to the infirmary where Etta laid on a gurney sleeping.

  “How is she?” I asked Zepar, who sat watching her.

  “All vitals are stable. Her breathing is steady, but I can’t seem to break her from the coma. I’ve tried everything.” Zepar flew to attention. Standing over her, I stroked her hair back.

  “I’ll take it from here. You’re dismissed.” I said. “Oh, Zepar…Thank you. I know I have wronged you in the past. I appreciate you seeing beyond my transgressions and helping her.” I continued.

  “Don’t thank me. Had my dear brother, Nicor, not told me of what is at stake, I would have driven my spear through her head simply to watch you suffer as you once made me suffer.” Zepar snipped then flashed.

  Petting Etta as she laid sleeping, I wondered where I would be able to take her, when it hit me. Scooping her into my arms, I took off for the place I knew she would feel safe no matter what. Materializing in John’s living room, I placed Etta on the couch. Rushed footsteps bolting down the stairs caught my attention.

  “I come with good intentions.” prepared for an attack, I declared as John, René, Gabriel, and Amy rounded the banister.

  “We know. We talked to Father. He told us everything. I’ll admit I didn’t understand it at first but after talking to Him and what I witnessed you do in Hell, I get it.” John patted my back.

  “So can we stay? At least until Father can figure out if he can fix her.”

  “Absolutely. What do you think we were all doing upstairs? We were getting the rooms ready for you, Etta, and the kids when they come to visit.” René said, pushing John aside, embracing me in a bear hug.

  Chapter Fourteen Etta

  Fluttering my eyes open, I saw the ceiling of my room. It must have been a dream. Sitting up in bed, still half asleep, I released a deep, drawn out yawn as I stretched my arms and back. Inspecting my body, I realized it hadn’t been a dream. My legs still faded into a black fog where my feet should have been.

  I half expected to find Ra or my dad sitting in the wicker chair by the desk but found myself alone. Rubbing my eyes, I got up from the bed. The sound of little voices and laughter came from downstairs. Puzzled, I shot from the room and down the stairs, ripping a red carnation garland off the banister.

  “I thought you might be waking up soon. Did you sleep well?” a voice called out from the kitchen as I ran to the backdoor.

  “Who are you?” I asked in my sleepy stupor, stepping back from the door, nudging toward the dining table.

  “Oh snap. Is this better?” Ra said as he dropped his illusion. I should have been happy to see him, but his red eyes, horns, and fanged teeth reminded me of all he had done for me.

  “It really hadn’t been a dream.” I said under my breath.

  “No. But the nightmare is finally over, Etta. How are you feeling?” Ra rubbed my shoulders.

  “Surprisingly, I feel great. How are you holding up?” I asked, searching for any sign of regret

  “I’m great. Father wants to talk to you. Did Lilith teach you how to put on illusion?”

  “You know about that?”

  “Yes. She told Father how she helped you and how I paid your debt. She said thank you, by the way, for giving her a new toy. C’mon.”

  “You talked to her? When? I thought Lucifer—?”

  “You can’t destroy what you did not create. Lilith has lived a long time without part of her soul; I doubt she’ll miss it now.”

  “How long was I out?” I asked as I wrapped my arms around Ra’s waist and snuggled my head into his belly.

  I had forgotten just how big he was as a Demon. At a towering eight feet tall, Ra hunched over, kissing the top of my head.

  “You were out for two weeks. I was beginning to think you weren’t ever going to wake up, but you started stirring this morning and talking in your sleep. A lot of people are waiting outside to see you, but Amy’s parents are here, so we can’t go out like this.” Ra answered as he put on illusion.

  Remembering what Lilith told me, I imagined the appearance I wanted to take on. Having seen the illusion Ra put on, I imagined a woman best suited for him.

  “Perfect.” Ra grabbed my hand and led me out into the backyard.

  In the center of the yard, two rows of chairs sat in front of an archway decorated in the same red carnations as the banister inside. At a picnic table sat my dad and René with a couple closely resembling Ra and I doting over three small human children. My best guess, the happy family was my mom, Nicor, and the kids. Over at another table a suited Gabriel piled food a mile high on a paper plate, while Amy and her parents look on in horror at his insatiable appetite. A group of six guys stood joking around and laughing. I could pinpoint the motley crew of Arches anywhere.

  Near a table, with a radio and speakers, sat two men and a woman I’d never seen before. Based off their stiff, erect posture and lack of socializing, it had to be Father, the Son, and the Spirit.

  The last I checked, Father wanted me dead for fear of what I’d be capable of. A lump rose in my throat. Had Ra been leading me to my death? As I contested walking any further into the yard, my attention was diverted.

  “Mommy!” three kids cried in unison as they flung their arms around my legs. I thought I’d go my whole existence without ever properly meeting or touching my kids. Kneeling down, I hugged each of them, kissing them on their foreheads generously.

  “Look what daddy taught me.” Uphir shrieked as he attempted to rub his head and belly in opposite directions.

  “It’s not as cool as what he taught me. Look, mommy.” Botis shoved Uphir aside as he conjured a fireball in his palm.

  “Botis, remember what daddy said…not with humans around.” Annahail rolled her eyes as she extinguished the flame in her brother’s hand.

  “Daddy? I smiled, looking up at Ra.

  “Okay, guys. Mommy needs to talk to great grandpa real quick, and then you guys can show her everything you’ve been learning.” Ra patted the children as they ran back to their table.

  “They were unable to say Rahovart and didn’t approve of Ra. So we figured since I am their father for all practical purposes, daddy was a more suitable name.” Ra smiled as he clutched my hand.

  Seeing Demons, Angels and half-breeds had been too overwhelming. Used to worlds divided, I’d been unable to imagine this being anything other than a cruel hallucination.

  “What’s going on, Ra?” I stopped, taking my hand from his. Panic swept over me.

  “A wedding reception.” Ra answered, cupping my chin
.

  “A wedding?” I asked, perplexed and on the borderline of hyperventilation.

  “Gabriel and Amy’s. Listen. Before you talk to Father I want you to know, no matter what you decide, I’ll take care of the kids, and we will always be here for you. Make the choice which is right for you, Etta, and whatever happens, we’ll figure out how to make it work.” Ra asserted as he led me to the table with the woman and two men.

  I wanted to pull away, snatch my babies, and run. As if sensing my escape plan, Father, in the appearance of an indigent elderly man, put his arm around me as I readied to bolt from the party. Expecting Him to strike me down where I stood, I flinched at His touch.

  “Etta! All is well. How are you?” Father asked, squeezing me tighter into him as he walked me toward the table where the Spirit and the Son sat.

  “I’m fine. And you?” I reluctantly replied as He led me past their table to the rear fence.

  Looking over my shoulder at Ra, he blew me a kiss then turned to the table the children sat at.

  “My child, I know this is a lot to take in especially after what you have been through, but I thought it best to get it over with. I have a present for you.” Father said, revealing a small blue box from his pocket.

  Opening the box, I gasped. Staring at the ruby inside, I had been at a loss for words. I’d gotten my essence back. I would be able to take on my angelic shape and no longer worry about hurting those around me.

  “Oh, thank you. Thank you. Thank you.” I shrieked, unable to contain my joy, I threw myself around Father.

  “It is yours to do with what you wish. If you choose to use it, you will be welcomed in Heaven.” He said, hugging me back.

  Letting go, I jumped up and down in excitement. As I turned to show Ra, I noticed him in the grass on his knees tickling Botis. Coming to their brother’s defense, Annahail and Uphir jumped on Ra’s back, trying to find a ticklish spot. Ra yanked them over his shoulder, poking them in return.

  Ra had done more than step up to the plate with my children. Watching him now, I saw he not only accepted them but had grown to love them. Hearing their laughter and seeing them so happy was all the more reason to be exhilarated, but a crushing thought came to me. The ones I loved most were damned.