I look up and see that there is a group of guys that I don’t know. There are five in total, and they’re all wearing West Raven colors—red and black instead of green and black, which are East Raven colors.
What the heck is this?
Everybody in the cafeteria seems to be just as confused as I am, so it’s definitely not something normal.
I look at the guys who are singing and all doing the same generic dance move. They’re walking through the dining hall, closer to where I’m sitting with my friends in the back of the cafeteria. A lot of people have their phones out now and are recording the five guys.
As they’re singing along to the music, I notice that they are looking my way. But certainly they’re not looking at me—just my way in general.
“What is this?” Sander asks me.
“I don’t know,” I answer. “It’s never happened since I’ve been here.”
I watch as the five guys walk closer to the table that we’re sitting at.
“Do you know what this is?” I ask Estaine.
“No,” he answers.
They boys from West Raven continue their singing as they make their way closer to where I’m sitting, but I don’t think too much about it because I don’t know them, but then I see Brooks come from the middle of the guys. I was so focused on the other boys I didn’t notice that he came in.
What the heck is Brooks doing? I watch as he dances with the other boys... he’s clearly not as good as they are and is about half a beat behind them. Still, it’s funny.
But then it’s suddenly no longer funny when I realize that he is making his way to my table. I have the urge to run or hide, but it’s too late.
Brooks is now standing in front of me, holding up a sign that says “Homecoming?” But all I can think about is the number of cameras that are currently pointed at us right now. How many of these kids are going to post these videos online, leading the terrorists right to me... right to this school.
“What do you say?” Brooks asks, once the song comes to an end. “Want to go to homecoming with me?”
The cafeteria is completely silent as it waits for me to respond.
But I don’t respond. I can’t. Because all I can think about is terrorists finding me here and killing all of my friends. So, instead of answering, I just get up and run out of the cafeteria, because I don’t think I could speak out loud if I tried.
Brooks doesn’t think. If he had, then he wouldn’t have come. He should’ve known that by doing something like that, he would draw attention. I need to be under the radar, but it’s completely impossible with him around. And I don’t know why he keeps doing this to me when he knows the danger that I’m in.
When I get outside, I literally can’t breathe. I take off my hoodie, suddenly feeling warm.
“Phoenix,” Sander says.
Of course Sander is here. He’s always here. And I’ve never been gladder of that fact than just now.
“Can’t... breathe...” I say.
“You’re okay,” he says. “You’re just having a panic attack.”
A panic attack?
I feel like I’m dying.
I have never in my life had a panic attack and this is absolutely horrible. I never, ever want to feel this way again.
“Those people... videos...” I say, breathing a little easier now that I know I’m not having a heart attack.
“Nobody can post a video or a picture of you online,” Sander says. “I’ve put blocks in place. Since this happened, we might have to address it to the school without giving details, but nobody is going to be able to post those videos.”
“What if your block doesn’t work?” I ask.
He smiles. “It will work. I promise.”
“But what if?” I ask again, because I need to know what will happen if somehow a video gets through.
“Then I will get the video taken down as we are leaving the state of Massachusetts,” Sander says. “Your safety is my number one priority, whether it is here, or anywhere else in the world.”
“Okay,” I say, feeling slightly better. “As long as everybody here is safe.”
Then I realize what just happened.
Brooks Remington just asked me to homecoming in front of my entire school. The same school that already thinks I’m cheating on my boyfriend with my bodyguard.
“You look like you’re going to puke,” Sander says.
“How many years would I get in prison if I murdered Brooks?” I ask.
He smiles. “Well, I could help you hide the evidence so you’d never get caught.”
I laugh, thinking he’s joking, but I suddenly realize he’s probably not joking. He probably could cover up a murder and that scares me slightly.
The door beside me opens and Brooks walks out. He has a towel under his nose and the white towel is stained red.
“Sorry, Phoenix,” Brooks says.
The five boys from West Raven are behind him, they all look okay, but maybe slightly humiliated. I would be humiliated too.
“No, I’m not going to homecoming with you,” I tell him.
“Yeah. You’re boyfriend kind of answered for you,” he says, pointing at his nose.
“What you did was stupid,” Sander says. “All of those kids in there have cellphones and quite of a few of them were recording. Did you stupidly forget that any videos of Phoenix posted online would compromise her location? If anybody found her, it would not only put her in danger, but every single person at this school.”
“Crap,” Brooks says. “I forgot. I’m sorry.”
“Go back to West Raven and don’t come back unless you have permission from me,” Sander says.
“Yeah... okay... I won’t,” Brooks says, backing away from Sander.
Sander is kind of scary, so I don’t blame him for being frightened. But I still find this whole situation highly entertaining. Brooks deserves to be scared after what he just put me through.
Brooks turns around and he and the other boys walk away.
“You okay?” Sander asks me.
“Yeah,” I answer. “I mean, I’m completely mortified, but at least I’ll have a fun story to tell my grandchildren someday.”
“That you will,” he says.
“There is no way I am going back in there, and there is no way that I am going to class today,” I say. “I really don’t care if you say I shouldn’t, but I am skipping class and I am going to go hide in my dorm room like the coward I am.”
“I don’t blame you,” Sander says. “I’ll bring you some Chinese take out for dinner tonight, if you want?”
“Yes, please,” I say. “Seriously, you are my hero.”
“Of course,” he says.
Sander and I walk back to my dorm room. He leaves after getting me safely inside, he says he has something to work on. Sometimes I forget that Sander isn’t a high school student. He seems so... normal. But really, he’s some kind of super-secret spy sent to protect me. Kind of crazy when I think about it.
Once I am in my dorm, I feel safe. But also, completely humiliated.
How am I ever supposed to show my face again?
My phone goes off.
ESTAINE: You okay?
ME: Yeah. Just decided to skip school the rest of the day. I’m sure it’ll only ignite more rumors about Sander and me since we’re both gone...
ESTAINE: Don’t worry about that. I’m sorry Brooks did that to you.
ME: You mean did that to me AGAIN? I’m starting to wonder if Brooks ever thinks before doing something.
ESTAINE: He doesn’t. Anyway, I’m going to class. Talk to you later.
ME: Later.
I sigh and fall back onto my bed.
Today, I hide. Tomorrow, I face reality.
Jealous.
The door to my dorm bursts open and I look over, expecting to see Sander walk through. I’m also expecting to yell at him because he didn’t knock. But it’s not Sander. It’s Teagan. I look at my phone and see that it’s just after
one and she should definitely be in class.
“What the heck, Phoenix,” she says, putting her hands on her hips.
The sassy side of her personality has come out a lot lately. I just hate that all this animosity is aimed towards me.
“What?” I ask.
“Lunch,” she says, her raised tone, insinuating that it must be obvious. “Brooks Remington asking you to prom. You storming out of there with Sander. Estaine punching Brooks in the face... I mean, honestly, I expected to see you and Sander in here together.”
“Well, you’re obviously wrong,” I say. “Because Sander is just my friend. Not that you will ever get that through your head.”
“What about Brooks?” Teagan asks.
“What about him? Was running from the dining hall not clarification enough?” I ask. “I am dating Estaine and I’m not interested in Brooks. And Brooks knows that, he’s just an impulsive idiot who does things without thinking.”
“Yeah, okay. You’re right about Brooks. But what about Estaine?” she asks.
“What about him?” I ask. “I’ll see him later tonight or something.”
“He punched Brooks in the face. He’s in trouble,” Teagan says.
“What? Why?”
“Phoenix, he punched somebody in the face,” she says. “That’s why he’s in trouble.”
“What’s going to happen?” I ask.
“I don’t know. He’s still in the dean’s office, but it doesn’t look good. I mean, he physically attacked somebody,” she says.
“But he’s a good student,” I say. “I mean, it’s not like he gets in trouble a lot.”
“You weren’t here last year. I mean... he got suspended a few times,” she says. “He could possibly get expelled for this.”
“What am I supposed to do about that?” I ask.
“I don’t know. Something,” she says.
“I didn’t ask Estaine to punch Brooks in the face. To be honest, I’m shocked he did that,” I say. “But that’s on him. I turned Brooks down. It’s not like I needed Estaine to defend my honor.”
“But that is who Estaine is,” Teagan says. “And he’s in love with you, but you’re too strung up over Sander to notice anything. You don’t deserve a guy like Estaine. You really don’t. Why would he even want to be with you?”
“I don’t know. Ask him,” I say, standing up and take a step closer to her. “Ask Estaine why he wants to be with me, because how would I know? I ask myself the same question every single day, because there is nothing special about me. I’m not strung up over Sander, and you saying that just makes me angry. I don’t know how many more ways I can tell you this, but Sander is my friend. Period. He doesn’t have feelings for me and I don’t have feelings for him. In fact, most of the time, he annoys me.”
“Then why do you always hang out with him?” she asks.
“Because he’s my best friend.”
“You don’t treat Estaine right,” she says.
“Maybe I do, maybe I don’t. I don’t know. He’s my first boyfriend,” I say. “I don’t know how to handle my feelings or even really understand them. But the way I treat him... isn’t it up to him to decide if it’s good or bad? Because, honestly, I’m trying to treat him good.”
“Do you love him?”
“No. I am not in love with Estaine,” I say. “At least, I don’t think so. And you say he loves me, but how could he? We’ve only known each other a month and have only been dating a week. He hasn’t told me that he loves me, and I’m glad he hasn’t, because I wouldn’t say it back. I couldn’t.”
“I do love him,” she says. “I kills me to know that you’re with him and that you don’t.”
“You have known him for a lot longer than I have,” I say. “And honestly, I wish you would’ve just been honest with me from the beginning. I wouldn’t have started dating him to begin with.”
“Really?” she asks.
“Really,” I say. “I’ll be honest, I really do like Estaine. He’s a good guy. He’s put up with far more than I probably would have if our roles were reversed. But if you want me to break up with him, if that is what it would take to fix us, then I will do it. Because your friendship means a lot to me. And I’m really tired of you being mad at me.”
My words have her taking a step back. “No. You’re right. I should’ve told you the truth in the beginning,” she says. “It’s just that I saw how happy you made him. And I haven’t seen him happy since River passed away. I wanted him to be happy, even if it wasn’t with me.”
“And what about now?” I ask.
“I still want him to be happy,” she says. “And I want you to be happy. I’m sorry. It’s just... I got defensive when I thought you weren’t treating Estaine right. But you are right. It’s not any of my business. It’s his. And he trusts that you’re not cheating on him with Sander, so I have to trust that, too. I don’t want you to break up with him. Stay with him as long as he makes you happy.”
“Really?” I ask, now smiling.
“Yes, really,” she says. “And I’ll stop to be jealous of you. Or at least, I will try.”
“Good,” I say. “Now, what am I supposed to do about Estaine being in trouble?”
“Nothing. You just have to wait,” she says.
“Maybe,” I say, thinking about my options. “I’ll call my uncle and see if he can do anything.”
“I doubt he can. I mean, Estaine’s dad is the freaking governor of this state. But definitely try,” she says. “I don’t want Estaine to be expelled.”
Me, neither.
And like that, somehow Teagan and I are friends again. Most people might not forgive her so easily, but how can I not? She’s the first friend I’ve ever made and she apologized. If it wasn’t for her, I probably never would’ve made friends at this school to begin with.
So, yeah. I forgive her.
I just hope that she doesn’t get jealous again.
This sucks.
As it turns out, Uncle Matty was able to help Estaine. Seeing as how he was seen with me in the video at the baseball game, Uncle Matty convinced the dean that it simply wouldn’t be safe for him outside of the school. Instead, Estaine is just in school suspension until next Thursday, meaning he will be separated from all the other students during school hours. He also has to help pick up trash around the school and he isn’t allowed visitors in his dorm room all weekend. Which means I won’t get to see him much.
Ironically, he is still allowed to play in the football game tomorrow night. It’s an away game, so I won’t be going. But I guess they need the star of the team.
That means Estaine and I will pretty much just be texting each other.
“This sucks,” I say to Estaine, talking to him on the phone.
I wish I could go see him. Or that he could come see me.
“It’s okay,” he says. “I deserve it. I deserve worse, to be honest.”
“I mean, you probably shouldn’t have punched Brooks,” I say.
“I just wanted him to get the hint that you’re taken.”
I laugh. “Well, I’m pretty sure running out on him was not enough. That had to be humiliating. But then you punched him. So, I’ll be surprised if Brooks even wants to be my friend now.”
“You still want to be his friend?” Estaine asks.
“Yes. I do. Even though I am very embarrassed about what happened, I can’t abandon him,” I say.
“Sometimes, I think you’re too nice of a person,” he says.
“Too nice?” I ask. “Nah.”
“You want to be everybody’s friend.”
“I do,” I say. “I mean, I’ve never really had friends before. So, this is all exciting to me. I hate the idea of losing a friend, even one as annoying as Brooks.”
“And that’s why I like you,” he says. “You’re nice. And I can’t even be mad at you for still wanting to be friends with Brooks, because you wouldn’t be Phoenix Black if you didn’t.”
“Hey, it’s Phoenix
Underwood here,” I say, joking—mostly. “In English class, Mr. Anderson called me Miss Underwood and I literally forgot that it was my fake last name. It was pretty awful.”
“You have to stop thinking of it as a fake name,” he says. “I mean, legally, aren’t you Phoenix Underwood, right now?”
“Yeah, I guess I am,” I say. “Actually, I think my ID says I’m Paige Underwood, because Phoenix is too uncommon of a name. But I refused to go by that.”
“I can’t see you being a Paige,” he says.
“Me, neither.”
“As much as I hate to say this, I need to get off here,” Estaine says. “I have to write a ten page paper for the dean.”
“Ten pages on what?”
“Basically, it’s me saying what I can do to help get my temper under control and talking about things I plan on doing when I’m angry... instead of punching somebody.”
I laugh. “Well, that’s what you get for punching him.”
“I know,” he says. “I deserve this.”
“Thank you for defending my honor, even if it wasn’t necessary,” I say.
“I’m sorry I acted like such a jealous boyfriend.”
“It’s okay,” I say. “Just remember next time that you have no reason to ever be jealous of Brooks. I’m dating you, not him.”
“Good,” he says. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow, Phoenix.”
“Night.”
“Night.”
After we hang up, I consider calling Brooks to see how he’s doing, but I realize that maybe some separation would do us good. After all, he did ask me to homecoming today, despite the fact that I have a boyfriend. And he humiliated me. He can wait one more day.
Friday, September 15
Friends again?
“So, you guys are friends again?” Emma asks Teagan and me that Friday in the dining hall.
It’s weird coming to lunch without Estaine. It’s definitely going to be a long week.
Never Ever (East Raven Academy Book 2) Page 9
