by Nichelle Rae
“I will.”
She looked up at me with a beaming smile and pulled me into another embrace. “Thank you. I hope I can make you happy here. I will do my very best.”
I smiled and hugged her. What a good feeling it was, holding my mother. My mother. I had a mother, and for the first time I actually realized that fact. I already loved her. She was my flesh and blood, the woman who bore me then had me ripped away from her. But I had her back now. We had each other.
She pulled away and gave me a playful smile. “You’d better get upstairs before Rabryn has a fit.” We both chuckled.
“I won’t fit, Mama,” a small voice said. We both turned to see Rabryn sitting on the stairs, looking at us from between the banister bars. “I like watching you happy.”
My mother tried to suppress a smile and placed her hands on her hips. “I thought I told you to go to bed.”
“I did go, but Azrel was taking so long I came to see what was keeping her. Then I heard you talking all nice and crying happy tears and hugging, I just sat and watched. I like it when you’re happy.”
My mother sighed and smiled fully. “Oh, my darling boy. You make it impossible to stay angry with you.”
“Of course I do,” he said with a wide, toothy grin. “That’s how I stay outta trouble.”
My mother and I laughed hysterically together. I caught the small jerk of her head, and we both ran after the little rascal, making Rabryn scream and run up the stairs. We were close on his heels, but he went into the first door on the left and shut it. My mother and I were left laughing in the hallway.
Just then another door opened, and I felt eyes on my back. I turned around to see my stepfather standing in the doorway at the end of the hall. I wanted to gasp at the sight of him. He wore only a pair of sleep bottoms so I could see that he was trim and very attractively built. It wasn’t a bulky, muscular build, but lean and beautiful. His dark-blonde hair was disheveled, falling to graze the sides of his neck. He was beautiful. I could see where Rabryn got his handsome looks. Rabryn, however, didn’t have his father’s brown eyes; he had mine and my mother’s blue ones.
Derweldo smiled, though it was clearly forced. “Well, well! What do we have here?”
Rabryn peeked out of the door. “Daddy!” he cried and ran to his father. Derweldo smiled genuinely as he picked Rabryn up with a playful growl and tossed the small boy over his head, across his shoulders, so that Rabryn’s stomach was against the back of his neck.
“Hey, buddy. Why aren’t you in bed?” Derweldo asked, looking at his son.
“Beldorn brought Azrel! See?” Rabryn replied, pointing at me.
Derweldo looked at me and smiled forcibly again. “I do see.”
“I’m sorry we woke you up,” I said.
“Not at all, I wanted to be woken up to greet you.” He looked at my mother dropping his brows. “Why didn’t you wake me?”
“Dear, I know you worked a lot this week, and tonight was the only night you’d get to sleep a decent number of hours.”
He set Rabryn down then looked at me again, keeping the tight smile on his face. Then took my hands into his and leaned in to kiss my cheek. “Welcome.”
“Thank you.”
Derweldo suddenly saw the sword and knife at my hip and thigh, and his smile vanished.
“Azrel knows how to sword fight, Dad! You shoulda seen her downstairs! She’s going to teach me how to be a real sword fighter!”
“Is she now?” Derweldo shamelessly gave me a fake, tight smile, not bothering to hide his distaste for me anymore. “Well, I’m glad you managed to arrive safely. I look forward to getting to know you and seeing my wife reunited with her long-lost daughter. You make her very happy.”
I nodded stiffly. “Thank you for allowing me to stay in your home.” I said as genuinely as I could, but the look in his eyes told me he understood my hidden message—the message that said, “I know this is your home, and I know you don’t want me here, but too bad.”
He forced another smile. “Of course,” he said. He looked down at Rabryn and ruffled his hair. “You get to bed, okay?” Derweldo looked at my mother. “Don’t be too long.” My mother nodded. He looked at me again. “Sleep well.”
“You, too,” I replied, keeping my gaze even. He nodded and turned back into the bedroom, shutting the door behind him.
My mother led me into the room Rabryn had entered, and I got ready for bed. I expected her to give me a nightgown, which I would have felt very uncomfortable in, but surprisingly she gave me pants and a top. I smiled as I put them on.
Looking down at my discarded clothing, I eyed the sword my father gave me and suddenly remembered the powers that I harbored. Being here almost made me forget about them. I ran my fingertips lightly along the hilt and decided in that moment that I would forever wear it at my side, though The Pitt seemed safe enough. I would look rather strange with it, but I couldn’t let my guard down, ever. I knew what Evil waited for me. I’d put away my other weapons, but that sword would go wherever I went. It was too important to be hidden away and forgotten about. Besides, I had a feeling I was going to be idle here in The Pitt for a while, and I needed to always keep up my knowledge of sword combating. But the magic that went along with the sword was going to stay hidden—forever, if possible!
Rabryn and I crawled into his rather large bed and he immediately cuddled up in my arms. My mother “tucked us in”—I thought that’s what Rabryn called it—than kissed us both on the head. I’d never been fawned over before and it was strange. But I figured I’d better get used to strange things. I was in a whole new world now.
“Sleep well, my dears,” she said as she left the room.
No sooner had the door shut than Rabryn spoke. “Will you tell me about your travels now? I’m not sleepy, and I’d like to know where you’ve been.”
I giggled. “Very well, dear brother.” I drew him closer to me and began my tale. As I spoke he took a strand of my long hair and twirled it around his little fingers. That night and in the following days, I told him everything about all the different places and people I’d seen with Beldorn. I told him almost everything about my father and Ortheldo and Isadith. I told him all about my past, except The White Warrior part.
In all our long years together, and through all our long talks, no matter how close we got, I never breathed a word of it. It was the only secret I ever kept from him, and I had a feeling it was going to turn around and bite me in the rear end one of these days. It pained me to keep secrets from my beloved brother, but I had no choice. What really helped me keep my secret though, and even made it a little easier, was the possibility that if Rabryn found out about it, he’d be in danger somehow. That alone made me bite my tongue whenever I was tempted to tell him anything. I would allow no harm to come to my brother, ever! Not mental or physical. He was too special to me, and I loved him too much.
Eight Years Later in The Pitt.
“He’s here, Azrel!” I heard Rabryn call from somewhere in the woods.
Finally! I thought to myself. I quickly made my way through the thick trees toward Rabryn’s voice. A few moments later I arrived where he stood in the woods with a green-robed figure on horseback.
“Looks like I’ve come just in time,” Beldorn said as he dismounted, clutching his usual white staff in his hand. “The celebration is tonight, isn’t it?”
“It is,” my brother replied happily.
Rabryn stood nose to nose with the Wizard now. He was so tall and handsome, so attractive at seventeen years old. His face was strong and sharp and so mature now. Seeing him, as when he stood next to the Wizard on this day, always made my heart ache remembering how he looked at nine years old. His bright blue eyes still held most of the innocence of his childhood and that made me happy. Some of it had been lost though, and it was my fault. But I didn’t want to think about that. Today was to be a happy day.
Rabryn looked over at me and Beldorn followed his gaze. Rabryn had just enough time to smile at me be
fore I bolted full speed toward the Wizard. “Beldorn!”
I was so happy to see his unchanged face. Both laughed as my brother jumped out of my path before I trampled him. I threw my arms around the Wizard’s neck and held him tightly. He laughed and returned my embrace.
“I think you should try harder to knock me over next time, Azrel,” Rabryn teased from behind me, “or I might think you’re losing your aggressive touch.”
I smiled. “Silence, boy. Can’t you see I’m reuniting with a dear friend?” Rabryn chuckled.
Beldorn gave me a last squeeze then gently pulled away from me. “Azrel, you are stunning! You look more and more like your father every day.” He meant it as a compliment, but it wasn’t. My smile melted, and I looked at Rabryn, whose sad gaze met mine. There went some of the innocence.
“Yes,” I said softly, “so I’m told.” I stepped away from the Wizard and looked at the ground. My brother came up beside me and placed a comforting arm around my shoulders.
Beldorn’s eyes shifted from me to Rabryn, then back to me. “Are you still being ridiculed because of your father?”
Beldorn didn’t mean being ridiculed about being the White Warrior. No one, not even Rabryn, knew about that. He was talking about the general treatment I got because of my father. Due to the story that my mother was forced to make up about my father kidnapping me, they believed I had my father’s evil tendencies. I sighed to myself. My father just could not catch a break from anyone.
I had been sort of accepted when I arrived, but I was quickly labeled an outsider—a “wild walker” they called it, when rumors of my many travels got around. It was also known—though I don’t know how—that my father was a sword master and that he had taught me some serious swordplay. That didn’t help my reputation much. People here didn’t like warfare or weapons and they sneered at me for always carrying a sword at my belt. They believed weapons only brought trouble; thus, I was labeled, among other things, a “troublemaking outsider.”
“Mark my words, Priweth,” a land mate had said to my mother, “that girl will bring trouble here someday.” That was the day I knew things would go ill for me in The Pitt, and did they ever.
Another problem was the fact that I passed my fighting knowledge onto Rabryn in “secrecy,” yet everyone found out about it. We didn’t try to keep it secret, they just decided to add that little tidbit into the mix of the rumors about me so more emphasis was put on my “deviant nature.” The truth was I really liked teaching my brother how to fight and use protective tools. He favored the bow more than the blade and handled it very well. I could even say he was more accurate with a bow than I was. It gave me piece of mind that, whenever the Evil hunting me decided to rear its ugly head, my brother would be able to protect himself.
Rumors and hatred for me evolved and deepened over the years and eventually became downright absurd. I was “forcing” Rabryn to learn to fight, and I “cast a spell on him” to make him protect me from the hatred of the people as fiercely as he did.
Yes, a spell.
Though these rumors were hush-hush, the people also questioned why my appearance never changed. I had arrived here barely twenty-one years old, and though I was now twenty-nine, I still possessed the young, vibrant face of a twenty-year-old. Some thought it was evil sorcery I’d pick up from my father; which was halfway true. I retained the physical appearance I had when I was handed the White Sword.
That cursed sword! I could swear its only mission was to ruin the lives of those who possessed it. It had ruined my father’s life when he ran away to protect it, and it thanked him by allowing him to be scorned for thousands of years, forcing him into hiding from all of civilization. Now, for its new owner, it caused the people of The Pitt to hate me in such a way I didn’t think possible! All to protect the blasted thing!
The treatment here got so bad, I finally made a desperate attempt to get some peace by establishing myself as someone to be feared. It was the only escape. I brought my sword to a local girl’s neck and threatened her and anyone else that even looked at me crossly. I reasoned that no one would approach someone they feared or call them a “miserable waste of halfway-good flesh,” or dare do the things to me they had done for so many years. The torture I endured here was the cause of my brother’s lost innocence as he watched me deal with it.
I wouldn’t admit it, but as this hatred for me continued, I worried that my mother and Rabryn would turn on me as everyone else had. I’d already lost my stepfather, Derweldo. Though he didn’t exactly mistreat me, I could just feel his eyes on my back, always making sure I wouldn’t bring harm to his family. Thankfully, I didn’t lose Rabryn or my mother. They both actually defended me. That was a relief because I loved them both greatly.
I got more feared as time went on because I would threaten the life of anyone who dared glance my way. I developed a clever wit and a sharp tongue from facing hateful words, and soon I could ward off a verbal attack with the best of them. I showed off my master ability to wield a sword as much as I could in public in hope of striking more fear into their hearts. It paid off. Eventually the insults and abuse stopped, and only fear and hatred of me remained. There were still some gutsy enough to say something or do something from time to time, but I could deal with that. I decided before coming here that I would adjust to whatever treatment I got, positive or negative, and that’s just what I did.
After my mother and Derweldo died of illness, only Rabryn remained to defend me. He became so very precious to me. I’d protect that boy to my death because I would rather die than live without the only person left in the world who loved me. For years Rabryn was always going out of his way to see me happy or make me smile, something no one else had ever done. He suffered a lot for his attempts to defend and protect me from the hatred. Though most of his attempts were in vain, he continued to try.
I sighed now as I looked at my beautiful brother. Beldorn was watching us closely. My poor Rabryn. Today I didn’t want Rabryn to be unhappy on my account. The party was The Pitt’s annual celebration of the coming of Spring. Celebrations always made my brother’s happiness peak. I wasn’t going to let Rabryn be upset today. I was going to do my best to keep him happy, and he couldn’t be happy if he knew I was upset.
So, when Beldorn asked if I was still being ridiculed, I smiled and jumped into his arms again. “It doesn’t matter!” I said and laughed. “You’re here.” I hugged my brother. “Rabryn’s here and everything is wonderful!”
That worked. Rabryn and Beldorn laughed.
We spoke merrily as we went down the grassy cliffs toward the land, mostly about Beldorn’s travels. All the time my brother and I spent together here was devoted to little adventures and exploring the woods, where no one of The Pitt ever ventured. We often got in light trouble with our mother for running off. Though I was certainly old enough and skilled enough to take care of him, I suppose deep down she didn’t want us to travel up into the woods because she feared it would only give the townspeople something else to sneer about. Being so adventurous when he was younger, and having a big sister who’d had adventures in her life, helped shape Rabryn’s eager and curious appetite today. That is why we both enjoyed Beldorn’s visits so much.
“I’m happy to report,” Beldorn said to my brother, “that The Pitt’s existence still remains an evil rumor or unknown at all.”
“Oh, blast!” I threw my arms up and slapped them down onto my thighs. “After all the trouble we’ve gone to, to make our existence known throughout Casdanarus.” That sent Beldorn and Rabryn into hysterics. Rabryn draped his arm around my neck and kissed my temple.
As we passed people busily preparing the town center for the party, I was grateful to realize most were too preoccupied to notice me. I was about to smile at this when I looked up and saw two females on the side of the trail looking my way. It was Clyryan and Seana of the Southern Cliffs. My smiled faded as they began pointing at me and laughing. I was vaguely aware that Rabryn and Beldorn’s conversation had s
topped and that they were watching me. The girls then mocked me by using their broomsticks to start a fake and cruelly exaggerated sword fight.
I took a breath and sighed. “This is where I leave you two,” I told Rabryn and Beldorn. Rabryn glared at the girls, his handsome face twisting in anger. I hugged Beldorn. “I’m glad you’re here, my friend.” Then I took Rabryn’s hands in mine and looked up at him. I forced a smile, pretending it didn’t bother me, and in a way, it didn’t. It was more than just the people here that had put me in an ill mood. “I’ll see you later.” I kissed his cheek.
I turned off the main trail back toward the cliffs that served as the natural walls of this land, but served as more of a cage for me. I shot a nasty look back to Clyryan and Seana, then soon disappeared. The sound of their laughter followed me as I began to scale back up the cliff toward the woods, where I usually went to seek solitude. I didn’t want to deal with this today; it was supposed to be a happy day.
Night fell and the party was in full swing. Music was loud and everyone was drinking and dancing and having a grand old time. A good distance away, I rested under an arthol tree, the short, gnarled species that dotted the land. I knew I wasn’t welcome there. Still, I smiled as I watched Rabryn and Beldorn at the party. Beldorn was a traveler as well, but he was accepted here because he was a mere passerby rather than a citizen, and he was well known. Plus, he didn’t have my father, or his reputation. He was happily talking to everyone and telling stories to the children. Rabryn was dancing and chatting up with the few friends he did have, despite who his sister was.
I sat on the ground and watched the party for a bit, but eventually turned my eyes away to look up toward the woods. I sighed and picked a long blade of grass to chew on and leaned back against the tree, daydreaming about the lovely lands I’d seen years ago, lands I longed to see again. It was something I’d caught myself doing more and more frequently lately.
