by Adele Whitby
Papa handed us each a velvet box—mine was the one tied with the red ribbon, of course.
Inside was a stunning gold pendant. It was shaped like half a heart and set with rubies that glittered in the sunlight streaming through the window. I pressed it against my heart, realizing that the last hand to hold it had been Mama’s.
“Oh, Papa,” I breathed. “I’ll cherish it forever.”
It was only then that I looked across the table to see that Katherine held the other half of the heart, only hers was studded with sapphires as blue as the summer sky.
“Now I must show you what makes these necklaces even more special,” Papa said. He held out his hands, and we each placed our pendant in them. Then Papa slid the two halves of the heart together to form a single, perfect heart.
I started to say something, but Papa held a finger to his lips and motioned us to lean in and listen.
Click. Click, whirrrrrrr.
I heard the sound of a clockwork mechanism, like that of a music box, and then the quiet creaking of a hinge. Papa turned the necklace over to reveal that a secret panel had opened on the back of the heart when the two halves were joined together.
A secret compartment! The excitement in Katherine’s face reflected what I was feeling. I loved the necklace even more because I knew that Mama had chosen it for us—two halves of a whole.
Papa slid the necklaces apart and fastened them around our necks. The minute it touched my skin, falling just over my own heart, I knew I would wear this necklace until I passed it down to my own daughter.
As much as I loved the necklace, I knew that the tray held letters written by Mama. These would be her last words to me, and I took my envelope with trembling fingers. Like me, Papa was too overcome with emotion to speak.
I read my letter silently, wiping away bittersweet tears. My heart swelled with Mama’s love and advice, and I vowed to make her proud of me. I would be the daughter and sister she wished me to be.
When we had all had a good cry and gotten ahold of ourselves again, I offered to read my letter to Katherine and Papa.
9 January 1848
My dearest daughter,
The fates have not been kind to us that my life should dim at the dawn of your adulthood. It is my greatest regret that I will not live to see you and your sister as women grown, married, perhaps mothers to girls of your own. I hold hope that the hole I leave in your life will be filled many times over with others who will cherish you as much as I do. Yet there may come times when you wish you could seek my counsel, and so I write this letter now for whenever you find yourself longing for your mother’s advice.
I had to take a deep breath in order to continue. There were so many times already that I longed for Mama’s advice.
My sweet child, it has been my privilege to watch you grow for the past eleven—nearly twelve—years. And though your childhood has yet to end, your father and I have been charged with the challenging task of deciding your future. Let me assure you that our decision was made with great care. When you are of age, you will marry your cousin Maxwell Tynne to fulfill the rules of inheritance. Maxwell is an honest and honorable young man and, I think, well suited for you. It is my great hope that your marriage will be a long and happy one, filled with love.
I wonder if you have noticed yet how others look to you to lead them. Doubtless they are drawn to your strength, which I see reflected even in the fiery hues of your favorite color; your dedication to your family; your commitment to everyone you meet; and your compassion for those less fortunate. Daughter, you have been graced with all the characteristics you will need as the next lady of Chatswood Manor.
The hour grows late, and I still have one more letter to write before I retire. And so, my darling Elizabeth, I will conclude here. Please know today, tomorrow, and every day of your life how very proud you’ve made me and how very much I love you.
Your loving mother
I had to take a moment to compose myself before I could look up from my letter. I folded it and pressed it to my heart. Finally, when I was able to speak, I saw that Papa’s and Katherine’s cheeks were wet also with tears.
Katherine wiped her eyes and began to read her own letter. It began much the same as mine, filled with Mama’s regret about not being able to see us grow up and marry and have children of our own. When it came the subject of our future lives, however, the letters differed.
Your grace, elegance, and the air of peace you carry with you always, reflected in the soothing tones of your favorite color, inspire everyone around you to be their best. You have the soul of a poet and an artist. When you are of age, I hope you will seize every bright, new prospect that comes your way. You have all the characteristics you need to live life to its fullest and embrace the new opportunities available to the adventurous women of our times.
When the time is right, I hope you meet a wonderful man and marry for love. I wish you a long, happy marriage filled with love and children. Daughter, you have everything you need to lead a rich, fulfilling life.
I know you will always value your family above all else and that you and your dear sister will love and support each other forever.
I must conclude now, my darling Katherine. Please know today, tomorrow, and every day of your life how very proud you’ve made me and how very much I love you.
Your loving mother
Katherine and I embraced each other, vowing to love each other forever, just as Mama wished.
“I am very proud of both of you,” Papa said, blinking away tears. “And I know your mama is, too.”
At that moment, Mr. Fellows discreetly opened the door. “Milord, we really must let the staff into the room to prepare for the ball,” he said.
“Yes, of course, Fellows,” Papa said, ushering us toward the door. “It’s time for you two to start thinking about whatever young ladies think about when they’re getting ready for a ball.”
Katherine and I smiled, shaking off our sadness.
“The ball!” I said. Then I thought about our dresses. “Our necklaces are going to look perfect with our ball gowns!”
Katherine and I went upstairs to put Mama’s letters in a special place. I knew I would read mine many, many times.
We found Essie checking the mousetraps in Katherine’s room. “Nothing caught for two days now, Lady Katherine,” she announced. “I think we’ve completely eradicated Madame Dubois’s ‘army of rats.’ ”
I couldn’t help but giggle, remembering how terrified the dressmaker had been and her hopeless efforts to appear dignified at the same time.
Essie turned toward me and gasped when she saw our necklaces. “Oh, how beautiful,” she said. “I knew Lady Mary had something very special planned for this birthday, but I never imagined anything so perfect.”
“They are perfect,” I said.
“Mama wanted them to remind us that we must always love and support each other,” Katherine said.
She held up her half of the heart. “I will always love my sister, Elizabeth,” she said.
“And I will always love my sister, Katherine,” I answered, doing the same.
The second the two halves came together, we heard the miniature gears turning, and the secret panel opened.
“Just like the secret—”
I cut myself off. I couldn’t tell Essie about the secret staircase without telling her why we had used it.
Essie turned to me with what was becoming a too-familiar expression—suspicion.
Katherine saw my alarm and jumped in to save me. “Papa told us a secret,” she said. “He’s very proud of us and said Mama would be proud, too.”
Essie smiled, and her eyes softened. “That’s no secret, at least not to anyone who’s met the two of you. I’m proud of you, too, and no mistake. You’re becoming very fine young ladies. And I know you’ll cherish those necklaces forever because your dear mother chose them for you,” she said.
“I wish you had something of your mother’s to remember her by,”
I said.
“Something to love and cherish,” Katherine added. “Like we love you.”
“I have the love of two of the finest young ladies in England,” Essie said, reaching to pull us close for a hug. “What more could I need?”
Later that morning, with all of the servants busy with party preparations, Katherine and I did our best to stay out of the way. Luncheon was served on a tray in our room. The hours ticked by slowly until Katherine pulled out Mama’s trinket box.
“There must be something in here that would look pretty on a bit of ribbon. A necklace we can give to Essie to remind her of how much we care about her,” she said.
“That’s a wonderful idea,” I answered.
We sorted through the trinkets, searching for the perfect thing. And then Katherine found it—a Celtic knot, a symbol of Ireland. There was a long arrow dangling below it, which would point to Essie’s heart. We rubbed it with a cloth until it was shiny, and then I found a blue ribbon and Katherine a red one. We twisted them together before attaching them to the knot. The ribbon would remind her of how much we loved her while the knot would be a symbol of her Irish mama.
Finally, after what seemed like three days instead of one afternoon, Essie came to let us know it was time to dress for the ball.
“How does everything look?” I asked.
“Beautiful, milady. You’ll be very pleased,” she said. “I believe this is the finest Chatswood Manor has ever looked.”
“And you’re the finest lady’s maid,” Katherine said, smiling. She handed Essie the necklace we had made for her.
Listening to Essie’s exclamations over its beauty, you would have thought the necklace was covered in gemstones, and I told her so.
“But it’s covered in something much better, milady. The love of you two girls is worth more to me than all the jewels in the world.”
The three of us turned misty once again.
“None of that now, ladies,” Essie said, wiping her own eyes. “I won’t send you to your birthday ball with red eyes. Now, who wants her hair done first?”
I sat at my dressing table and watched in the mirror while Essie pulled my hair up into a sophisticated, grown-up knot and tucked small seed-pearl pins around it, alternating with red rosettes to match the red in my dress. Katherine and I had decided to wear our hair exactly the same, only hers would have tiny blue larkspurs instead of red roses.
I stepped into my dress so as not to muss my hair and watched myself in the mirror as Essie fastened the back. The dress’s neckline showed off my necklace beautifully. Wearing it, I felt like Mama was nearby, watching over me.
When I was finished and Essie had slipped on my dancing slippers, it was Katherine’s turn. I twirled, once, twice, three times around her bedchamber, practicing my waltz while she had her hair done. My dress swirled around me, and I didn’t step on my train once. Soon, Katherine joined me, holding my hands as we swept around her bedchamber and Essie clapped. Katherine’s sapphires glittered, and I knew my rubies must have been doing the same.
A few moments later, Papa knocked on Katherine’s door. Essie opened it to him and then slipped out of the room to join the other servants.
“The guests are gathered in the ballroom,” Papa said, “ready to greet the birthday girls.” He stopped to admire our dresses. “Are you turning twelve or sixteen?” he asked with a smile. “You’ll be leaving me any moment to begin your married lives.”
“Papa!” I said. “Don’t rush us away. Besides, I will be the lady of Chatswood Manor one day—unless you’d rather I run away and marry a pirate.”
“A pirate! Never, my dear girl,” he answered. “Cousin Maxwell will do quite well.” He kissed my forehead and then Katherine’s.
“I’ll marry a pirate, then,” Katherine teased.
“You will not!” Papa said.
“You look very elegant, Papa,” Katherine said, changing the subject.
“Not nearly as elegant as my lovely young ladies,” he answered. “I think many young men will be losing their hearts tonight.”
Katherine giggled and took one of Papa’s arms. I took the other. We walked to the grand staircase leading to the great hall, and I gasped at the beauty of it. All the chandeliers were ablaze, and flowers graced every table. There were vases of red roses, blue larkspur, and white lilies.
The staff waited for us in two lines at the bottom of the staircase. Mr. Fellows and Mrs. Cosgrove were at the front of the line, as always. Next to Mrs. Cosgrove was Mrs. Fields. I looked for Clarice but soon realized that she and the rest of the kitchen maids must be in the kitchen, busy with the food.
Papa’s valet and Essie also stood in positions of prominence, followed by the footmen, the housemaids, and other members of the vast staff.
They all looked up at Katherine and me, and I felt my heart swell with too many emotions—pride, happiness, nervous excitement, and the longing for Mama that always lurked underneath the rest.
As the three of us took our first step onto the staircase, the staff began to applaud. All of those feelings in my heart were now overwhelmed by one emotion: love. I saw it in Katherine’s face too, and Papa’s. We had the best staff in the world at Chatswood Manor.
As soon as we reached the bottom of the stairs, Mr. Fellows stepped forward to wish us a happy birthday on behalf of the entire staff.
“Many happy returns of the day, Lady Elizabeth. Lady Katherine,” he said.
I leaned forward and kissed the man on the cheek, as did Katherine. Our very formal butler was flustered by our unusual display of affection, but he quickly regained his dignity.
A moment later, the staff was back in full party mode, rushing about to take care of everything that needed to be done for the comfort of our guests.
Mr. Fellows threw open the doors of the ballroom. “Lord Chatswood, Earl of Chatswood Manor,” he announced. “Accompanied by Lady Elizabeth Chatswood and Lady Katherine Chatswood.”
The guests pressed forward to get a good look at us, and once again there was clapping. There was such a crush of people that it was hard to see who was there, but Papa led us on a promenade around the ballroom to greet our guests. As in the great hall, the chandeliers were ablaze. Ladies’ jewels sparkled, and I reached up to touch my ruby-studded heart and felt as if Mama was looking down at me.
The flowers in the ballroom were the purple ones we had requested, combining my favorite color, red, with Katherine’s blue. They adorned the walls, were woven through the chandeliers, and enormous vases of every type of purple flower were placed on either side of the orchestra. I knew they would grace the tables in the dining room as well.
I waved to Cousin Cecily, who looked regal in a dress of green silk organza with a green-and-gold brocade bodice. Her mother, my aunt Margaret, stepped forward to tell Katherine and me that we were the picture of Mama, while Cecily held my necklace in her hand for a moment to admire its beauty.
Katherine was nearer to Maxwell Tynne and his family than I was, and they exchanged a word, while I greeted the Clarksons and the Smythes.
Once we had made a complete circle of the room, Papa nodded to the orchestra, and they began to play a waltz. As I was the eldest, he swept me into his arms, and together we spun around the dance floor. Our guests’ faces blurred as he twirled me around to the music. I almost giggled when I heard my dancing master’s voice in my head, reminding me to hold my arms steady and to stay on my toes.
Too soon, Papa twirled me back to where Katherine stood, and it was her chance to dance with him. Her eyes sparkled and her cheeks were pink with happiness. My sister never had to be reminded to stay on her toes and keep her arms firm. She had a natural elegance that I lacked.
When the waltz was over, Papa brought my sister back to me. The orchestra struck up a reel, and our guests began to take to the dance floor. I had a brief moment of panic. What if no one asked me to dance? By the way Katherine squeezed my hand, I could tell she had the same fear. We both breathed a sigh of relief when we
spotted Cousin Maxwell making his way toward us. Behind him, looking sheepish and shy, were Charles Clarkson and Edward Smythe.
Cousin Maxwell bowed to my sister while the other two boys hung back, out of earshot.
“May I have this dance, Lady Elizabeth?” Maxwell asked.
Katherine’s cheeks went from pink to red and then were nearly the same purple as our flowers, but her eyes danced with excitement. “I’m Lady Katherine,” she said.
Now it was Maxwell’s turn to blush, but clearly there was something about my sister that drew his attention more than I did. I laughed, as much to spare their feelings as to save myself. I would much rather dance with Charles or Edward before I had to take the dance floor with a long string of relatives, including my cousin Maxwell.
“Do dance together, please,” I said. “Cousin Maxwell and I can dance later. We have all evening.”
“Are you sure?” Katherine asked. She knew, even more than I did, that decorum called for Maxwell to dance the first dance with me, not my twin.
“I’m sure,” I said, casting my eyes in the direction of the other boys. “I have other dance partners waiting.”
That was all the encouragement they needed. The pair joined the couples on the dance floor, and Edward Smythe stepped forward to offer me his hand, which I happily took.
My partner was rather too shy to offer much conversation, so I was free to keep an eye on Katherine and Maxwell. Their conversation was vigorous and lively, and I had never seen my sister look so beautiful.
Then I noticed that Aunt Edwina kept trying to signal the couple from the side of the ballroom. They were too intent on each other to notice, and finally my aunt drew her husband into the dance. I knew that a lady should never lead on the dance floor, but nevertheless, I led my partner in the same direction and reached the couple just when my aunt and uncle did.
“Maxwell,” his mother said, “you are dancing with the wrong sister. You were to dance the first dance with Lady Elizabeth.”
Maxwell’s face fell and Katherine looked away with a guilty expression, but I only laughed. “Surely you can tell us apart, Aunt Edwina. I’m not Elizabeth. I’m Katherine,” I said.
