by Jan Burchett
Contents
Cover
About the Book
Title Page
Dedication
Map
Max and Ben
1. Sports Day Mischief
2. Barney Cooks Up a Storm
3. Secret Plan: Free Theo
4. Midnight Feast Fun
Gargoylz Fact File
Also by Burchett and Vogler
Copyright
About the Book
Max and Ben are planning a midnight feast! But will their gargoyle guests make it to the party? Will there be enough cookies to go round? And can the boys outwit Ben’s older sister before she discovers the secret of the Gargoylz?
Find out in these four fabulous new stories about Max, Ben and the Gargoylz gang.
For Emily Groome, with love. Auntie Sara
- Burchett & Vogler
For my Nephew Hayden, who’s a bit like Ben
- Leighton Noyes
Gargoylz: grotesque stone creatures found on old buildings, spouting rainwater from the guttering. Sometimes seen causing mischief and mayhem before scampering away over rooftops.
* * *
Hello, I’m the Web Gargoyle. Look out for me – I’ll be hiding in one of the pictures in the book. When you spot me, be sure to make a note of the secret codeword I’m holding. The codeword unlocks a secret level of the amazing Gargoylz game on our fabulous website at www.gargolyz.co.uk
* * *
* * *
School Report – Max Black
Days absent: 0
Days late: 0
Max is a bright boy. If he spent as much time on his school work as he does on annoying Lucinda Tellingly he would get much better marks. I am pleased to see that he enjoys exercise – although I do not count running down corridors making racing car noises. Also I would be glad if he did not shout “Awesome” quite so loudly every time we have football practice.
Class teacher – Miss Deirdre Bleet
The only good thing I can say about Max Black is that he is always early for school. However, he is the last one into the classroom. He spends far too much time playing tricks with Ben Neal. Mrs Pumpkin is still off sick after discovering an earwig farm in her handbag. Max ignores all school rules. He has recently developed a curious interest in drainpipes and has been seen talking to the wall. This behaviour is outrageous and must stop.
Head teacher – Hagatha Hogsbottom (Mrs)
* * *
* * *
School Report – Ben Neal
Days absent: 0
Days late: 0
Ben has many abilities which he does not always use. He works very hard at dreaming up tricks to play, which gives him very little time to concentrate on his learning. He enjoys football and skateboarding – indeed, he and his board can frequently be found upside down in a flowerbed.
Class teacher – Miss Deirdre Bleet
Ben Neal is a strange boy. He is often to be found grinning at gutters.
He constantly breaks school rule number 742: boys must not break school rules.
Ben thinks he can get away with anything by flashing his blue eyes and looking innocent. I am not fooled. Indeed I am still waiting for him and Max Black to write a note of apology to Mr Bucket the caretaker. Gluing his wellington boots to the staffroom ceiling was outrageous!
Head teacher – Hagatha Hogsbottom (Mrs)
* * *
1. Sports Day Mischief
MAX BLACK AND his best friend, Ben Neal, nine-year-old super secret agents, were on their way to school. They had an important mission.
“Ready for action, Agent Neal?” asked Max.
Ben nodded. “Ready, Agent Black.”
Max bent down and tied his right leg tightly to Ben’s left with his school scarf. He straightened up. “We’re sure to win the three-legged race at Sports Day after all this practice. Go!”
The boys lurched forwards, wobbled and fell over.
“Better sort out our technique if we’re going to break the world record,” said Ben, rubbing his knee.
“Let’s try again,” said Max as they staggered to their feet. “The starter has raised his pistol . . . wait for it . . . BANG!”
They bounded off down the road, this time without a stumble.
Max’s spy radar picked up someone in the distance: pale, skinny, frilly socks. He knew what that meant. It was Enemy Agent Lucinda Tellingly, codename: Bossy Boots.
They whizzed past her, making her ponytail fly.
“You don’t stand a chance!” she called after them nastily.
Ben twisted round to stick his tongue out and fell into a hedge, taking Max with him. Lucinda cackled loudly.
“She’ll be sorry when we beat her and the rest of Year Four,” said Max, pulling leaves out of his spiky dark hair.
They untangled themselves and belted off again at breakneck speed.
“Awesome pace!” panted Ben. “I can’t wait for this afternoon. Sports Day’s the best day of the school year, apart from Christmas Dinner Day.”
“Every school day’s cool now we’ve got our secret friends,” said Max.
They reached the gates of Oldacre Primary and flung their arms round the gatepost to stop. Max peered up at the ancient church next door. The gutters and spouts were decorated with carved gargoylz. Only Max and Ben knew that the little stone creatures were alive and loved to play tricks – just like the boys.
They made for the wall between the playground and the church.
“Greetingz,” came a growly purr.
A gargoyle with a monkey face, big pointy ears and sparkling eyes was sitting on a gravestone in the churchyard. It was Toby.
“Dangling drainpipes!” he exclaimed. “Two headz? Three legz? Have you turned into a monster? I thought only gargoylz had special powerz.”
“We’re practising for Sports Day,” said Max. “We want to win the three-legged race.”
They heard a sharp squawk from the church roof. “Shiver me timbers!”
Max and Ben looked over in surprise to see a gargoyle they’d never set eyes on before. He had an eagle’s beak, small piercing eyes and a feathery stone head. He flapped his large wings up and down eagerly.
“This is Ira,” said Toby. “Ira, say hello to Max and Ben.”
“Humanz!” squawked Ira, flapping his wings at them. “Make ’em walk the plank!”
“I’ve told you about Max and Ben,” said Toby patiently. “They’re our friendz.”
“Part of the crew?” asked Ira suspiciously.
“Yes, they’ll keep our secret,” Toby assured him. “They’re almost as good as gargoylz.”
“Welcome aboard then,” said Ira, saluting with a wing.
“Why does he talk like that?” Ben whispered to Toby.
“He’s never been the same since a parrot from a pirate ship landed on him,” explained Toby. “Now he thinks he’s a pirate too.”
“Outrageous!” came a shriek from across the playground.
Toby and Ira froze.
Max’s radar burst into action: grey hair, beaky nose, evil eyes flashing. He knew what that meant. It was Enemy Agent Mrs Hogsbottom, commonly known as Mrs Hogsbum, codename: Evil Head Teacher.
Mrs Hogsbottom strode up to them, making the playground shake. “How dare you break school rule number eight hundred and forty-three: boys must not use their stripy school scarves to tie their legs together!”
“We’re practising for the three-legged race this afternoon,” Ben tried to explain.
“We want to break the world record,” added Max.
“No excuses!” snapped Mrs Hogsbottom. She marched off and shouted at some girls who were singing too happily.
The gargoylz
unfroze.
“Nasty old landlubber!” squawked Ira.
“I’d love to see you break the world record,” said Toby wistfully.
“Why don’t you come and watch?” suggested Max.
“We’ll be on the school field all afternoon.
You can hide in the hedge like you did last night when we played that trick on Science Club.”
“Spluttering gutterz!” Toby grinned. “What a good idea. See you there.”
It was a bright, sunny afternoon and Sports Day started right after lunch. Everything was ready.
When no one was looking, Max and Ben sidled over to the hedge and peered through the leaves. Seven pairs of stone eyes stared back at them.
“You’ve all come to watch,” said Max. “Awesome!”
A dog-faced gargoyle with spines down his back smiled at them shyly. “Toby says you’re going to break the world record.”
“Too right, Barney,” Ben told him. He looked over at the board of events. “Our race is last,” he groaned. “That’s ages.”
“Time for a trick then,” said Max.
The gargoylz gave a great cheer.
Max whipped a small pot out of his pocket. “This is the perfect way to get Lucinda back for being mean to us on the way to school. She’s in the sack race next, with all her friends. Time for Secret Plan: Itchy Surprise.”
Ben read the label aloud: “Jimmy Joker’s Best Itching Powder. Just the thing, Agent Black. I can’t wait to see Lucinda’s face when she starts scratching. But how do we put it in the sacks without being seen?”
“Ssspluttering guttersss! That sounds like a trick for me to play.” A gargoyle with a head covered with wriggling snakes grinned up at him.
“Brilliant plan, Eli,” said Max, handing the pot to him. “Off you go.”
Eli took the pot in his mouth, turned into a grass snake and slithered off towards the pile of brown sacks. He was soon back
Lucinda and the other racers climbed into their sacks and stood eagerly at the starting line.
“I haven’t bothered to practise,” Lucinda said loudly, seeing Max and Ben watching. “I’ll win anyway.”
“Ready, steady, wheeeee!” Mr Widget blew the starting whistle. The race began. The competitors bounced along the grass, cheered on by their classmates. But one by one they began to jump about wildly, scratching all over. Max and Ben found it hard to keep a straight face when Lucinda shot out of her sack and ran off, shrieking. Finally Mr Widget called the race off.
“OUTRAGEOUS!” bellowed Mrs Hogsbottom from her special head teacher’s chair. “Give them all extra homework!”
There was a volley of gargoyle cackles from the hedge.
“Exsssellent!” declared Eli, the snakes on his head hissing in delight. “What a prank!”
“We haven’t finished yet.” Max grinned. “I’ve thought of a brilliant way to make our race come sooner. We’ll speed up all the other races. What’s next?”
“Infants’ egg and spoon,” Ben read from the board.
“Time for Secret Plan: Sticky Egg and Spoon Race,” declared Max. He pulled a tube of glue from his pocket. “Follow me, Agent Neal. No one will see. They’re all watching the trampolining.” They sneaked over to where the special spoons and hard-boiled eggs were waiting for the infants’ race.
“We’ll stick every egg to a spoon,” chuckled Max. “The infants won’t have to wobble along for hours trying to balance them. It’ll be the fastest egg and spoon race on the planet.”
“Awesome plan, Agent Black,” said Ben.
Max had just blobbed a drop of glue onto the first spoon when he heard a bellow. It was Mrs Hogsbottom.
“What do you think you’re doing?”
“We’re helping the little ones out,” said Ben. “Making the race a bit easier for them.” He put on his best innocent look. It always worked on the dinner ladies, who cooed over his blond hair and blue eyes and gave him extra baked beans. It never worked on Mrs Hogsbottom.
“Outrageous!” she growled, taking the glue and putting it in her pocket. “Trying to help someone cheat, were you?”
“Oh no,” protested Max. “We were going to glue all of them the same.”
Mrs Hogsbottom marched them over to their class. “Sit down quietly and wait for your race. And no more nonsense.”
“Nonsense?” said Max indignantly when she’d stomped back to her chair. “We were being helpful. She could at least have said thank you.”
“No chance,” said Ben. “It’s probably against one of her school rules.” He looked over to where the obstacle race was just finishing. “It’s our turn soon,” he said excitedly. “Let’s practise.”
They charged along to their teacher, Miss Bleet.
“Can we have our leg tie, please, miss?” asked Ben. “We’re running together.”
“I can’t possibly let you do that!” she said nervously. “You’ll do something silly. I’ve not forgotten last year when you put flour bombs in the long jump sand.”
“But we have to run together,” pleaded Max. “We’re going to break the world record.”
“The world record will have to wait,” insisted Miss Bleet. “I have a better idea. Something that will keep you out of trouble.
Ben, you’ll be Tiffany’s partner, and Max, you go with Lucinda.”
Max and Ben gawped at their teacher.
“You can’t mean—” spluttered Max.
“Tied to girls!” groaned Ben. “And not just any girls – Lucinda and Tiffany are the most goody-goody girls in the history of goody-goody girls!”
“They smell all flowery, miss,” Max told her earnestly. “We’ll die from the pong and it’ll be your fault.”
Miss Bleet waved him away.
Max’s face suddenly lit up. “It’s Friday,” he hissed happily in Ben’s ear. “And it’s nearly three o’clock.”
Ben stared at him. “How’s that going to stop us being trapped with the ghastly girls?”
Max beamed. “My sister goes to gym at the sports centre on Fridays after school. I had to promise to be ready at three so that Mum could pick us both up and get Jessica there in time.” He peered at the crowd of spectators to find his mum. “She’ll be waving at me any minute to say it’s time to go. We’re saved.”
“You’re forgetting one thing,” said Ben miserably. “You might be saved but I’m not. I’m going to be tied to Tiffany Goodchild. My life is over.”
“I’d forgotten that.” Max frowned. “We need a special plan for you.”
“Got it!” said Ben. “I’ll tell Miss Bleet I’ve broken my leg. I can’t race then.”
“Excellent plan, Agent Neal,” said Max. “I’ll let Mum know I’m ready to go while you break the news to Miss Bleet.”
Ben ran off.
“Don’t forget to limp!” Max yelled after him.
Three minutes later Ben was back. Max was sitting by the hedge, his head in his hands.
“I can’t believe my idea didn’t work!” he groaned. “Nan’s taking Jessica to gym so that Mum can watch us break the world record.”
“And Miss Bleet didn’t believe I’d broken my leg,” said Ben sadly. “Even when I collapsed in front of her and rolled about like a footballer. Now we’re doomed to be tied to those smelly girls.”
“What’s wrong?” said a gurgly voice. Toby popped up between them.
They told him all about the terrible fate that awaited them.
Toby smiled. “Perhaps we could help. There must be one of our special powerz that will work.”
“Awesome,” said Max, cheering up. “But which one?”
Toby scratched his stony chin. “My flying won’t be much use.”
“And Barney’s stinky smells don’t work on people outdoors unless they’re really close to him,” said Ben.
Toby’s golden eyes suddenly lit up. “We need Zack!” he declared. “Zack can make himself invisible and steal those red things Miss Bleet is going to tie your legs with.”
“P
erfect!” exclaimed Max. “No ties, no race. But where is Zack?”
POP! Zack appeared out of nowhere. He ran up and down the grass, tail swishing eagerly. “Did someone call?” he panted.
Max quickly explained what they wanted him to do. POP! Zack vanished. In an instant he was back, some red ties in his mouth and some draped over his fuzzy mane. Ben shoved them under the hedge and covered them with leaves.
“Take your places for the three-legged race,” trumpeted Mrs Hogsbottom.
“Let’s go.” Max grinned. “We’d better look keen.”
Miss Bleet tripped off to find the ties and the boys ran over to stand next to their partners. Lucinda scowled at Max. Max smiled sweetly back. Any minute now their teacher would find there weren’t any ties and the race would be abandoned.
But now Miss Bleet was approaching – holding some ropes. The boys gawped at her in horror.
“Couldn’t find the ties,” she twittered nervously.
“But these will do just as well.”
“Help!” Max groaned as she tied him to his partner. “I’ll catch the Lucinda Lurgy being this close!”
“Shut up, horrible boy!” snapped Lucinda.
Ben tried to twist himself free from Tiffany. “I’m being overcome by dangerous girly fumes!” he gasped.
But it was too late. Mr Widget was starting the race. “Ready . . . steady . . .”
Suddenly the sky went dark and huge drops of rain began to fall, faster and faster. In seconds everyone was soaked to the skin.
“Outrageous!” bellowed Mrs Hogsbottom, putting up a huge black umbrella and not letting anyone share it. “School rule number four hundred and thirteen – it must not rain on Sports Day! Everybody inside. At the double!”
