by M. H. Soars
ME: “Nah, it’s safe.”
He texts me their address and ten minutes later I’m on my way to Littleton. The drive takes about forty-five minutes. When I arrive at the suburban, two-story home, I notice all the cars lining both sides of the street. Not such a small get together after all. I don’t mind. I peer at the neighboring house, Sebastian’s old home, and I feel a pang in my chest. I can’t believe my mate was able to keep going after the shitty deal life handed him. I know too well what’s like to lose someone you love. The hole in my chest festers; my guilt is like a flesh-eating parasite. I push the nasty visual back even though there’s bile in my mouth. My hands start to shake and I reach for the little plastic bottle inside the glove compartment. I take half my usual dose of Cody—I don’t want to meet Liv’s parents completely baked.
Feeling in control once more, I step out of the car and cross the street. I ring the doorbell and wonder if anyone will hear it. The sound of animated chatter and music is loud, even from where I stand. A minute later, the red door opens and there’s a tall young guy blocking the entrance.
“May I help you?”
“Is Sebastian here?” I ignore the suspicious stare the bloke is giving me.
“Who wants to know?” He crosses his arms and puffs up his chest.
“Are you a bouncer or something? I’m Bas’s best friend.”
“Really?” The idiot raises an eyebrow. “What was Sebastian’s name before he went through his gender reassignment treatment?”
His face is serious but I know this wanker is fucking with me. I grin. “That’s easy. Mathilda.”
“Jer, what are you doing there?” A woman’s voice asks from inside the house.
“Nothing, Mom. Just dealing with a party crasher.”
Ah, I should have known. The little fucker must be Liv’s younger brother Jeremy. He’s pushed aside and a beautiful woman takes his place. Her hair is light brown and straight, reaching her shoulders. Her eyes are the same shade as Liv’s, hazel. Liv’s mum must be near her fifties but she looks like she’s in her thirties. The pretty lady smiles at me and the action makes little creases appear in the corners of her eyes.
“Come on in, Oliver. Sebastian is out the back.”
My face betrays my puzzlement and I hear Jeremy chuckle behind me. I turn just in time to see his mother swat his arm.
“Ouch. What did I do?” The kid rubs the sore spot.
“I need help in the kitchen,” his mother says, her expression saying don’t mess with me.
I let them be and follow the noise of loud voices coming from outside. The sliding door to the backyard is open and from my vantage point, I spot Sebastian manning the grill. My eyes scan the rest of the open space, looking for Saylor. Disappointment twists my guts when I don’t see her anywhere. I push the sentiment aside and berate myself for even allowing it to sprout. She’s just a girl after all.
Squaring off my chest, I take the steps down to the grass and stride toward my friend. But he turns before I can reach him, his brows furrowed in annoyance.
“Bloody hell, it took you long enough to get here.”
“What…”
Someone grabs my shoulders from behind and yells, “Bazinga!”
My heart goes up to my throat and crashes back inside my ribcage. “What the hell!”
Liv and Sebastian laugh and laugh at my expense. I glare at the duo. “You knew I was coming?”
“Of course. Your poor excuse about a surprise wedding gift was a dead giveaway.”
I run a hand through my short hair. “Man, I thought I was being a fucking genius.”
“Relax, dude. I already knew you were in town. I saw you having lunch with Allan Eriksson two days ago. Thank you very much for letting me know, by the way.”
Sebastian tries to make an angry face, but the corners of his lips twitch up.
Liv engulfs me in a tight embrace. “It’s good to have you here, Ollie.”
I’m caught off guard. I’m not used to open displays of affection like this, unless it’s leading to sex. But I hug her back and push that thought out of my mind. Not that I fancy Liv, never had. She steps back and the smile on her face makes her eyes twinkle.
“It’s good to be here,” I say and mean it one hundred percent. I hadn’t realized how much I missed being around these two crazy-in-love kids until now. Their happiness is a contagious energy, and it’s impossible to stay immune to it.
Liv turns to Sebastian. “Are you gonna hug your best friend or what?”
Sebastian rolls his eyes. “I suppose.”
We do the manly half hug, clap on the back thing. Liv looks on, then shakes her head before muttering, “Boys.”
She walks away, and my mate follows her with his eyes like a lost puppy.
“I see Liv still has you wrapped around her finger.”
“Always.”
“Did you put Jeremy up to harass me at the door?”
Sebastian feigns innocence. “Me? I wouldn’t dream of it.”
“Right. So, when is your death sentence day?”
“Jesus, Ollie. I told you the last time we spoke. In two and a half months. I swear to God, you’re the worst best man ever.”
“Wait? I’m the best man?”
Sebastian stops what he’s doing and stares at me, the surprise in his eyes genuine. “You’re kidding, right?”
I let my grin unfurl. “Bazinga!”
Sebastian lets out a relieved sigh. “For a moment there I thought you were serious.”
“Do you think I would forget something that important? Wait until you hear where I’m taking you for your bachelor party.”
“Ollie, I told you nothing crazy. I don’t want any strippers or wild animals. I’ve seen enough random pussy to last me a lifetime.”
I raise my hands. “I hear you, mate. I can’t promise you no wild animals, though.”
Sebastian narrows his eyes at me. “What are you planning?”
“Ah, you’ll have to wait and see.” I glance at my surroundings. “So, where’s Saylor?”
I try to sound nonchalant, but it seems I’m just too fucking obvious.
“Okay, bro. I’m just going to say this once. Stay away from her. I don’t need you messing with Liv’s best friend right before the wedding.”
I glance at Bas, doing my best impression of being offended.
“Good Lord, take your mind out of the gutter. I just want to say hello to my partner in crime.”
“Well, I’m here,” that silky voice that makes my cock go hard on the spot comes from behind me. I turn around and come face to face with Saylor, my worst obsession.
SAYLOR
I brace myself for the impact, but as soon as Oliver turns around and my gaze collides with his electric blue eyes, I know I’ll have to bring my A-game if I’m to survive being near him. I haven’t seen the man in six months, but just being under his scorching gaze is enough to make me relive our fiery kiss and crave for more. I’ve never felt this crazy fixation for anyone before. It’s like an ice cold fever that won’t quit, a yearning that makes by body tingle all over in anticipation.
Oliver’s gaze skates over my body deliberately slowly, and a satisfied grin is plastered on his smug face when he focuses on my eyes again.
“Hello, there,” he says.
“What are you doing here?” I snap and my rude reply earns me a frown from Sebastian. Shit, I really need to work on tempering my bitchiness when I’m nervous.
Oliver chuckles. “I see you’re still mad at me. I’m kind of honored.”
I cross my arms in front of my chest and bite my tongue to keep from saying anything else that will give away how much Oliver is affecting me.
Someone touches my arm and with a side glance I see it’s Liv. “Be nice, Blue. I can’t have my maid of honor bickering with the best man.”
My shoulders sag as I let out a heavy sigh. I’ve never been part of a wedding party before so I have no idea how much interaction there is between the maid of
honor and the best man. I hope it’s minimal. Oliver keeps staring at me like he can read my mind. It’s unnerving.
“I gotta make a call.” I turn on my heel and walk away, trying to keep my steps slow and relaxed. But all I want to do is sprint back to the house. That’s how badly Oliver’s presence is turning my head around. I hate this.
Once inside, I veer to the powder room. The make-a-call excuse is terrible, but I need a moment to recover. Inside the small room, I stare at my reflection in the mirror and count to ten in my head. I tell my heart to calm the fuck down and to stop galloping at full speed. I feel like a teenager suffering from her first crush and that’s not an emotional state I want to revisit.
I splash cold water on my flushed face and redo my loose braid. After taking a couple of deep breaths and squaring my shoulders, I can almost pretend I’m ready to go back out. I refuse to let Oliver’s presence keep me from spending quality time with my best friend.
I place one foot out of the door when his voice startles me. “How was that call?”
I jump on the spot, placing a hand over my chest. “Jesus. Did you follow me?”
Oliver is leaning nonchalantly against the wall with his arms crossed. I notice for the first time what he’s wearing, a black T-shirt that highlights his muscled chest and arms. He is also blonder than I remember. But it’s his devious mouth that makes me lose the ability to form coherent thoughts. God, I want to kiss him again.
He pushes himself off of the wall and moves closer. I hold my ground, feigning a pissed off stance. He can’t know how much I crave his nearness.
“What if I did?” he whispers in my ear, making my skin break out in goose bumps.
“I’d say I don’t appreciate stalkers.”
Oliver takes a step back and stares at me. I wish I knew what he is thinking.
“You’ve changed your hair. I kind of liked the mermaid colors.”
I touch my white blonde locks before narrowing my eyes at Oliver. “Did you just follow me to comment on my hair?”
“I want to clear the air around us. I know that we started on the wrong foot—”
“You don’t say,” I cut him off and Oliver flattens his lips.
“But we’ve ended on a very interesting note,” he finishes his sentence with a smirk.
I cross my arms and keep on glaring at the infuriating man. “Don’t get any fancy ideas. That kiss meant nothing and there won’t be a repeat.”
He steps into my personal space again. “Are you sure? I thought that was a wicked kiss. It’s definitely worth an encore.”
I push him away. “It’s been months. Get over yourself. Don’t you have a line of ravenous groupies dying for your attention?”
“Ravenous groupies?” He chuckles. “The images you paint in my head, Saylor. Then you blame me for getting fancy ideas.”
“Listen, Oliver. I don’t know how long you’re in town for, but I would like for us to try to act amicable whenever we’re forced together thanks to our friends’ wedding. So you’d better quit with the sexual innuendo.”
Oliver sighs loudly like what I just asked him is a huge, inconvenient favor. “You’re killing me here, Saylor. Do you know how hard it will be for me to look at you and not want you?”
I suck in a breath as my heart lurches in my chest. It takes me a moment to find my ground again and answer him.
“Try your best,” I say, my voice thin and without substance.
Oliver reaches out and takes a strand of my hair, letting it slide through his fingers. I remain frozen on the spot.
“Maddening, but I will.” He drops my hair and takes a couple of steps back. “And since I’m being completely honest here, I’m seriously considering making California home.”
Oliver goes back to the party outside, leaving me alone to digest the news. Why does it bother me so much that he wants to move to the same state as me? It’s not like we’ll ever see each other besides when we’re doing wedding stuff. What annoys me the most is how my heart hasn’t gotten the memo yet that Oliver is a bad idea. It celebrates furiously in my chest, like it has just discovered how to beat.
Five
SAYLOR
“So, we’ve picked a date,” Liv makes the announcement to a group of twenty or so people. “Sebastian and I are getting married on September 3rd in Hawaii.”
“Hawaii? Sweet!” Jeremy says.
He’s the only one from Liv’s family who seems to be enthusiastic about the news, but like the awesome people the Dawson’s are, they don’t utter a single negative word. I’m surprised by the news as well. Liv has been dreaming about planning her wedding since she got engaged to Bas and she never once mentioned the desire to do it outside of Cali.
From the corner of my eye, I see Mandy gnaw her bottom lip as she stares at her lap. I turn on my seat to face her fully.
“What’s wrong?”
She looks up and tries to hide her distress, quite poorly, I might add. She has never been capable of masking her emotions. Her expression reads like an open book.
“I don’t know if I’ll be able to go with my grandmother being sick and all.”
She keeps her gaze lowered while her hands play with the napkin.
“Don’t be silly, Mandy. Grams will be fine,” Connor, Mandy’s brother, says from seat next to hers.
We lock gazes and he gives me a small smile. I don’t reciprocate. I can’t. After our brief and disastrous affair, I’m afraid that if I show him any affection, even innocently, he will try to rekindle what we had.
We never told Mandy that for two months last year, Connor and I spent most of our free time in bed together. I guess we both knew it was a mistake from the get-go and we wanted to spare Mandy the drama. Our fling ended badly when Connor received an out of town last minute job offer and he left in a hurry without saying a word. I thought that whatever we had had run its course and I hooked up with someone else while he was gone. He wasn’t happy when he found out. The blow out was ugly and it made things crystal clear to me—don’t ever hook up with someone you can’t escape from afterwards.
Something I have to remind myself when my body goes all crazy over Oliver.
When I don’t smile back at Connor, he averts his gaze and looks straight ahead. The hard set of his jaw tells me I’m right to act like a bitch. I know Connor doesn’t love me, he never did. We were awesome together in bed, but when we weren’t screwing, we couldn’t get along for two seconds to save our lives.
The atmosphere feels heavy and uncomfortable, so when I spot Liv walking back to the house, I take the opportunity to escape. I also want to talk to her in private. I corner her in the big open kitchen and I’m glad that no one else is around.
I’ve spent many mornings, afternoons, and nights in this particular room. I know where every single plate, utensil, and all of the appliances are. It was in this kitchen where Liv and I baked our very first and inedible cake, where Kimmy taught us how to make a strawberry daiquiri when we were all too young to drink it. We’ve made good memories here.
Liv is looking for something inside the fridge when I blurt out the question that has been burning a hole through my head since she announced her destination wedding.
“What’s up with this whole Hawaiian wedding business? I thought you wanted to organize it yourself. How are you going to do that from here?”
She closes the fridge door and looks at me.
“Oh, that was Sebastian’s idea.”
“And are you okay with it?” I search my friend’s face for any sign that she’s only agreeing to the idea to please her fiancé.
She gives me a small smile, but her eyes aren’t sad. “Oh, I was completely against the idea. We had a big fight about it actually. I’d started planning a local wedding, I had already found the perfect location and everything. But I got busier and busier at work and that, added to the stress of planning a wedding, almost caused me a break down. Sebastian wasn’t happy to see me like that.”
“How come this is the
first time I’m hearing about it?” I can’t help the sudden heaviness in my chest.
“You were doing your thing, Blue. You were so happy with Wreck of the Day, I didn’t want to bring you down with my problems.”
“Chica, that’s what best friends are for.”
Liv shakes her head. “It all worked out in the end. Sebastian and I talked, and I finally saw that his idea of a destination wedding was perfect. I still get to plan a bunch of stuff, so it’s not like I’m giving away complete control. Plus, it will be so much fun, having all my family and friends together in a gorgeous location. We’re staying for an entire week and Sebastian is paying for everything.”
“Well, he certainly has the means.” I raise an eyebrow.
“He truly wants to do this for me, Blue. He still carries a lot of guilt for what happened between us.”
“As long as you’re happy. That’s all that matters to me.”
Liv levels her gaze with mine. “I am truly happy. You don’t have to worry about me.”
I pull her into a bear hug. “Ugh, I don’t know what I’ll do once Sebastian takes you away from me forever.”
“Oh, there you are,” Kimmy says from behind me. “I’ve been looking all over for you two.”
Liv and I break apart and I turn to face Liv’s sister. “What’s up, Kimmy?”
“I need to have a word with you, Saylor.” I frown at Kimmy’s serious tone and expression.
I love Liv’s sister to death, but she can be a mean bitch when she puts her mind to it. I sense I’m about to witness that side of her. I search my brain for something I may have done to piss her off, but I’ve been on my best behavior today.
Kimmy whirls on her high heeled sandals and I follow her. I know Liv’s childhood home like the back of my hand, having spent countless days here when I was younger. I expect Kimmy to pull me to a corner of the living room, but she keeps marching on until we reach their dad’s office. Kimmy waits for me to enter first and I find Oliver there with his back to the door. He’s perusing the wall-to-wall bookshelf, but he turns when he hears me enter.
