by Tasha Fawkes
I chuckle and bounce her on my cock. She moans, stretching her arm out in front of her and resting it against the wall behind me. She rides me furiously, both forceful and aggressive, until I'm on the verge of exploding inside her. I growl, my hands clutching at her hips. I hold myself against her while she rides me back and forth. She gasps, groaning her thighs clench around me. She comes, and the feel of her body convulsing against my cock is all I need to push me over the edge.
“Fuck,” I mutter as my body jolts forward, my cock throbbing as I release. I grunt, thrusting into her wet pussy until she’s too much to handle.
Panting, she rolls off me.
We lie on the bed in silence, neither of us saying anything. She stares at the ceiling I glance at her. I don't even know want to know what she's thinking. I just want to know that she's okay. I'm not sure whether I stay or go, or what she wants from me. I roll onto my side and study her.
“Tell me how I can help you,” I say.
She turns to me, surprised by my question.
“I'm okay, I'm just…I don’t know. I feel a little bit off today, that’s all. I’m sure I’ll be fine tomorrow.”
“Okay. If you’re sure,” I say.
She takes my hand, entwining her fingers in mine. I’m enjoying lying here, with her, touching her fingers and stroking her skin. It's nice not having to think about everything that is going on between us outside of just being together. We don't need words to fill the silence. We’re comfortable with each other.
“I can stick around if you want me to,” I say after a while.
She shakes her head. “No, you need to go back to work. Do what you need to do. I think I need some time to clear my head, anyway.”
I nod then lean over and kiss her gently on the lips, before dragging myself off the bed. She watches me as I get dressed. Just before I walk out, I lean over her again, my mouth exploring hers.
“Call me if you need me,” I say.
She nods and smiles at me.
“I will.”
I drive home, deep in thought. I’m still not sure what to make of what happened back there. That wasn't her normal behavior. Not that I didn’t like her taking control, I just didn’t want it to be for the wrong reasons.
I shook my head, because the more I think about it, the more I realize I should've stopped that before it even started and made her talk to me. The problem was, once she started things, they progressed so quickly that I couldn't have stopped them, even if I’d wanted to.
Chapter 16
Angela
I wish I hadn’t have done that.
The sex was great, but it wasn’t like me to be so forward and aggressive with him. I took charge, which is something I wouldn’t normally do, and while it felt good, I wasn’t sure it had happened for the right reasons. I wanted to block out everything I was feeling and prove to myself that I could be that person. And I had done it, but now I feel embarrassed and no doubt Nate is wondering what the hell is wrong with me. I can't take back how that just went down, so I just need to get over it and move on. I wish it were that easy.
I want to crawl under a rock and stay there for a week and forget this ever happened. I can’t even explain it to myself, because I have no idea what came over me. I groan and roll over, burying my face in my pillow. I feel like I don't know myself anymore. Everything I thought I wanted has changed, since arriving here. And it’s not just Nate. It’s everything.
Sighing, I stalk into my bedroom and throw on some sweatpants and a top, then I sit on the couch with my legs tucked under me. I stare aimlessly at the TV, an empty feeling in my stomach. I can’t focus long enough to concentrate on what I’m watching. My head throbs and my body aches. I close my eyes and sigh.
I can’t even think straight at the moment.
I shake my head and reach for my phone, studying my recent messages. It's funny, in a really sad and lonely kind of way; I've had no calls from my current friends back in New York since I got here. Not even one. In fact, the only people in my recent call history are Nate, Charlene and Shana. Even my father has only called once and that was to berate me about work.
Maybe I should just move over here.
It seems that anyone who cares about me is already here. I wasn't serious when I thought it, but the more I think about it the more I can't quite convince myself why it's not a good idea. Maybe it's exactly what I need. A change. A fresh start. Nate. I shake my head.
If anything, he is a reason not to move over here. Or at least, he will be once I’m done ruining his life. I sigh, because nothing in my life is ever that simple. Everything comes with a layer of complication.
I jump when someone knocks on the door.
Did Nate forget something? Or is he checking up on me already?
I stand up and walk over to the door, opening it up. I'm shocked when I see my father standing there. I stare at him my heart pounding. What the hell is he doing here? He smiles at me.
“You can say hello,” he says.
“I think I'll start by asking what you’re doing here,” I say. If I don’t sound happy to hear from him, it’s because I’m not.
“Don't be like that,” he says, smirking at me. “How about you invite me inside and make me a coffee and we’ll talk?”
I step aside and let him, but I'm not making him anything until he tells me why he’s here.
“Will you stop frowning at me,” he says. I cross my arms over my chest in response. “I think you know damn well why I'm here.”
“Because you think you know how to do my job better than me?” I ask, sarcasm dripping off my voice.
“Well yes. I wouldn't be sleeping with my clients, for starters, so I guess that puts me ahead of you.”
My heart stops. I stare at him, positive that I must have heard him wrong. How could he know that? And more to the point, what the hell is he doing here? Did he fly over just because he knew chastising me in person would be more embarrassing than over the phone? That wouldn’t surprise me.
“Sit down.” He orders.
I sit, but I don’t look at him. I can’t. I’m way too embarrassed
“I got a call from my old pal Henry Burns. He’s concerned that your ruining an entire family’s fortune by sleeping with Nate. Do you think this is just about you two? Because it's not.”
“This thing with Nate isn’t interfering—”
“Do you really believe that? You’re avoiding doing what you need to do, and your actions are going to crush his entire family. That’s the reality you need to face.” He glares at me. “You might be okay with that, but I certainly won't be allowing it.”
“You don't know what you're talking about,” I say.
“I know exactly what I'm talking about and I think you know it too. Or is sleeping with Nate your idea of getting the job done? I wasn’t aware that’s how you did things,” he says. I glare at him, because now he’s just being mean.
“It's none of your business,” I say, gritting my teeth. “He's a client—"
“Who’s going to destroy you and his family.” He sighs and softens his approach. “How long until he turns on you and rejects you?” he asks. I tense, trying to ignore the rush of fear his comment brings. “It’s happened before, remember? It always happens. And Henry is pretty sure that Nate’s just playing you. He's trying to get you to change your mind, and by the sounds of it, it’s working.”
I don’t answer. Instead I stand there and listen to him undermine me. I’ve never been good enough for my father, I knew that much. I just hadn’t realized until now how little he thought of me.
“He doesn't care about you, Angie. The moment you give your recommendations, he'll drop you so fast…”
I sit down my heart racing. I hate him for saying that, and I don't want to believe him, but he’s planted the seed of doubt…what if he's right? What if this is all just a game for Nate and he doesn’t feel anything for me? I'm sure it started out that way, but I’m positive that there are real feelings there now�
�but what if there’s not?
Can I handle another rejection? My stomach churns. I don't think I can.
“Please,” I say to him. “Just go. I can't deal with this right now.”
He stands up and shakes his head.
“I'm staying at the Continental. Call me when you get some sense. I expected more from you, Angela. I thought I raised you better than to throw your career away over some guy. Especially a guy who doesn't really care for you.”
He walks out, closing the door behind him. I sit there, unable to move. My heart pounds as a panic attack begins to take hold of me. It’s coming on, no matter how hard I try and push it away. It's there eating, at me, slowly breaking me down. I can't do this. I can't risk ending up getting hurt. If I end this now, then at least I’ll save my face. I'll also save my dignity and my career. I won't be left with nothing. I can't risk everything for him.
Not when I'm not even sure that his feelings are genuine.
I have a shower and throw on my running gear, determined to give it half an hour before I call Nate. I need to make sure that I’m making the right decision, and the only best way I know how to do that is to run. I need to clear my head and then consider this.
I run my usual route and the moment my feet hit the pavement and my heart begins to pound, I automatically start to feel better. The more I think about it, the more I'm sure that I'm making the right decision. It has nothing to do with my father turning up or what he said, I came to this on my own. If he hadn't have turned up, I'm sure I would've made the decision anyway. When I get back to my apartment, I text Nate to tell him that I need to speak to him, then I call my father.
“Fine. I'll ended with him and I'll make my recommendations. Will you please leave now?”
“What? I flew all this way over here to see you. The least you can do is have dinner with me.”
“Fine,” I say. “I'll meet you at your hotel in an hour. I'll have dinner with you and then please, for the love of God, go home.”
“Okay, and Angela? I’m proud of you. I know it can’t have been easy to call me and admit that you're wrong.”
I frown and cover my face with my hands. Even a compliment from him sounds insulting. How does my father always manage to make me feel like I'm five years old again?
I sit through dinner with my father, not really listening to him talk. He goes on about things that I don’t really care about. To keep the peace and avoid another argument, I smile and nod and pretend that I'm listening. I even throw a few words out every now and then, which just happen to fit into whatever he was talking about. It's not until halfway through the meal that he puts down his fork and frowns at me.
“You haven't been listening to a word I’ve said, have you?” he asks.
I shake my head. “I'm sorry. I guess I'm just nervous about speaking to Nate.”
“Why?” he says. “You’re not having second thoughts, are you?”
“No, of course not. I just…”
It isn’t a complete lie. I wasn’t just having second thoughts. I was also having third, fourth and fifth thoughts. I keep going back and forth in my mind what the best thing to do is. I'm worried that once I tell him things are over between us, I'm going to regret it. Hell, I'm already regretting it, and I haven’t even told him. That has to mean something, doesn’t it?
“I just know that no man is worth ruining your career over. You know that, Angie,” he says. His brow creases as he stares at me.
“I understand that, but that isn't an ordinary case for me. Normally, the people who ask for my services want my help. Nate is running that foundation exactly the way he wants to, exactly the way he intended it to run and now I have to tell him that’s wrong?” I shake my head. “I'm just finding it hard to rationalize.”
“But that doesn't matter. His whole family is going to lose everything if that foundation doesn't turn a profit. It's that simple.” He sighs wipes his mouth with his napkin and then reaches for my hand. “Honey, I know you mean well, but think about it. Think about it long and hard. I know that foundation means a lot to Nate, but he needs to start putting his family first, because they're the ones who are going to suffer. Them and you. If you ask me, he's very selfish to only consider himself in this scenario. Is that the kind of man you want?”
I shake my head. Of course, I don’t want it. I honestly hadn't thought of it that way, but I guess he has a point. He is being very narrowminded when it comes to looking at everything. Has he considered his family, or what his plan is if he doesn’t meet the stipulation? What’s the plan if I don't give the recommendations I should, to turn a profit? He might not care about the money, but his family does. They stand to lose everything too.
He can't live with that, can he?
Chapter 17
Nate
I spend most of the morning lazing around the house, which is completely out of character for me. To be honest, I just want to enjoy the fact that I'm really starting to like Angela. We’ve been spending a lot of time together lately, but it still doesn’t feel like enough. I want more, and when we’re not together, I find myself thinking about her.
I close my eyes. I just want to lay back on this couch and think about her for five minutes and not have to worry about going into work or when we’re going to be ripped apart.
My phone vibrates, so I fish it out of my pocket. I see Angela's name pop up and I smile, until I read her message.
Angela: I'm sorry. I can't see you anymore.
What the fuck?
I sit up. I have to be reading that wrong. But no, the second time I read it, it says the same thing. My heart races. This has to be a joke. But why would she joke about something like that? This is no joke. She’s really ending this in a fucking text message.
Who does this?
My stomach churns as I try calling her. She doesn’t answer, which I half expect, but that doesn’t stop me trying again. Every time I press redial my anger builds until I'm ready to explode. She can't just text me and give me nothing else.
After the tenth call goes unanswered, I text her.
Me: Call me back now, or I'll come over there.
I smirk when my phone rings almost immediately.
“What are you doing, Nate?” she says.
“What am I doing?” I laugh. “You can't send me a message like that and then not speak to me about it. Tell me what's going on?”
“There's nothing going on,” she says quietly. “It's just not working.”
“It was working fine this morning while you were sucking my cock.” I growl.
I shake my head and run my hand through my hair, trying to calm myself down. I hold my hand out in front of me and study it. I'm shaking. That’s how worked up I am.
“Angela please, just tell me what's going on.”
“It's not going to work. We’re tiptoeing around the fact that I'm here to destroy your foundation and that you're going to hate me once I do it.”
“So don't do it, then.”
She laughs. “My God. You really are a selfish prick,” she says.
She hangs up on me before I can respond. I stare at the phone in disbelief. First, she breaks up with me by text message and then she says that? I shake my head because it's just not good enough. If this is ending, then it’s ending on my terms. The only thing I want is an explanation why.
I throw on some clothes and I drive straight over to her place, where I spin a sob story to her doorman and so he lets me up. I stand out the front of her apartment, taking a moment to compose myself before I start pounding on that door. She knows it’s me, so I’m surprised when the door swings open. She stares at me through the small crack in the door.
“Talk to me,” I say to her.
“Why did you come here?” she asks. I see the pain in her eyes and I soften, then I remember how much I’m hurting and the anger returns. “You’re wasting your time.”
“You can't do this without at least explaining to me why. You call me selfish, yet you’re trying
to rip apart my charity.” I laugh, because that’s just absurd.
She opens the door wider and motions for me to come in.
“The neighbors are probably about to call the police,” she mutters. “No doubt they’ll all be talking about this.” She adds, running her hands through her hair.
“I don't care if the whole fucking street is talking about us.” I snap. “What's going on? Why the sudden change of heart?”
“Because I realized the truth, what you're too scared to admit to yourself. This is going to end the moment I hand over my recommendations to you,” she says. “So why wait?
I stare at her. I'm not sure how to feel. Part of me is upset because I thought I was so close to convincing her, the other part of me wants to say fuck the recommendations, I don't care about them. But I do. We both know I do. I sit down on the arm of the couch and look at her.
“So what happened? I don’t believe all this came out of nowhere.”
She sighs. “Henry Burns called my father. He told him that we were sleeping together and that you were playing me to try and get me to change my mind.”
“This is because of your father?” I make the mistake of asking.
She lets out a loud sigh. “No. It's because of you and me, that's it. He made a point though, when he said that you were selfish. You're only seeing this from your point of view. Let's say that I don't hand over the recommendations. Let's say you carry on with the foundation the way it is, and you don’t get the inheritance. Are you the only one who suffers in that scenario?” she asks.
I don't answer, because we both know the answer to that is no.
“So what is it, Nate? Are you fine with your family losing everything, or not?” She stares at me, waiting for an answer. When it doesn’t come, she shakes her head. “I'm not sure I want to be with someone who would disregard their entire family’s inheritance and livelihood for the sake of themselves.”
“But it's not for me.” I snap. “This is nothing to do with me.”
